Present
Kai left the room, followed by Will and Michael, and the office fell silent until we heard the dull thud of the front door slamming shut.
Then my father launched out of his chair, swung around, and grabbed me with one hand, squeezing my jaw.
I gasped as his fingers dug in.
“I wish I could kill you,” he bit out, getting in my face. “I would snap your fucking neck in a second if I didn’t know that piece-of-shit son of mine would lose his little temper and do something stupid.”
He shoved me away, and I fell into David, who grabbed me before I fell and righted me.
“Make sure he gets her used,” he told David.
My breath shook. “What?”
But he didn’t answer me. He swung around the desk and charged out of the room, leaving me alone with the guys.
I pulled away from David and scurried off to the side, putting everyone in front of me. What the hell did he mean?
One of the young guys, McCandless, moved toward me slowly, a smile in his blue eyes.
But Ilia stepped up from the other side, putting a hand on his chest, stopping him.
A moment of relief hit me. I could take on one, but I couldn’t take them all. David, Lev, and Ilia wouldn’t hurt me.
But then Ilia’s icy blue eyes turned toward me, and he moved, taking off his jacket. “I’ve wanted this for a long time,” he said, tossing his jacket on my father’s desk.
My stomach sank to my feet, and my mouth fell open. God, I was going to throw up.
Combing a hand through his blond hair, he reached out and grabbed me, pulling me into his body.
I growled, twisting away, shoving him, and bolting. I ran for the door, but the two guards were there, and Ilia grabbed my jacket from behind, hauling me back and throwing me to the ground.
“Ah!” I cried out, pain shooting up my back, but I quickly flipped over and scrambled away.
The patio doors were there. It was only late afternoon, but it was getting dark. I could lose them in the forest.
Something caught my ankle, though, and pulled me back. I dug my nails into the hardwood floor, trying to get my knees under me to push off, but his weight crushed down, and I was panting for air as my lungs constricted.
My jacket, only secured with buttons, was ripped off me from behind, and hair hung in my face, my hat having fallen off at some point.
I looked around for David and Lev, not able to get my head up very far, but I couldn’t see them. Where were they? They wouldn’t let this happen, would they?
I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking with a silent sob I refused to let out.
I heard a shuffle behind me, more grunts, and it sounded like a table was falling over, but I couldn’t see.
And then his hand was in my jeans. They were being yanked against my hips, and everything inside kicked in. I thrashed, kicking and trying to twist around as I bared my teeth. As soon as I could face him, I was going to bite. Everything I’d told Rika to do.
He gripped my hair tight at my scalp, pushing my head into the floor as he pulled down my jeans. I clenched my jaw together, my face twisted and every muscle tight.
No.
No!
“Aren’t you going to scream?” he taunted in my ear. “Cry?”
No.
I felt him working his own jeans behind me, and then he leaned in again, slipping a hand down between my legs. “You can be mine,” he whispered. “Such a sweet, little whore.”
And I jerked up, twisting my neck more than it should’ve gone, and bit his cheek.
“Ugh!” he growled and turned away, loosening his grip long enough for me to shoot over and grab anything I could reach.
I latched onto the leg of a small, round end table and pulled, catching a crystal bowl that tumbled off. Taking it, I swung around and smashed it into the side of Ilia’s head, shards of glass falling everywhere as the dish crumbled in my hand.
Pressing the pieces left into his skin, I barely even noticed the sharp pain in my own hand as the chunks dug through my glove.
He cried out, tumbling to the side. I quickly kicked off my boots and jeans, still around my knees, and scrambled away from him. I slammed my hand down on Gabriel’s desk, pushing myself up, and saw the gold letter opener laying there.
“Come here, you bitch.”
Grabbing the sharp object and gripping it tight, I whipped around, not sure how close he was. It caught the side of his face, slicing a crimson line from ear to mouth.
He grabbed hold of his cheek, falling to his knees again. I fisted my hand, feeling the pain of the glass, and hit him as hard as I could again and again and again until I couldn’t breathe anymore.
He fell to his back, spent, and I stared at him, fingers still gripping the knife tightly. I fought not to go and sink the blade into his chest.
I wanted them all—everyone—to know they can’t hurt me. I don’t allow it.
Raising my eyes, I glared at Lev and David who stood on the other side of the room with Gabriel’s guards. David had one in a choke-hold, and Lev had the other pinned to the wall. That was what the scuffle was about that I’d heard.
They were protecting me, after all.
I dropped the letter opener on the floor and picked up the napkin sitting on top of Gabriel’s dinner dishes on his desk. Blood trickled down from my nose, around my lips, and dripped from my chin, and I wiped it away, tasting the metallic saltiness filter through my teeth.
I wrapped the napkin around my cut hand and stalked over to the man at David’s feet, squeezing my fist in his hair. “Get him and get out of here,” I said in a low tone, pushing him toward Ilia.
I’d be dead in a day if I called the police.
But justice would come. I’d make sure of it.
Lev released his guard, and the two of them stumbled out of the office, taking Ilia with them.
I sniffled, tasting more blood drip down my throat as I walked for the guys. I was still in my underwear and a T-shirt, and there was blood in my hair, making a few strands stick to my face. That’s all Lev and David saw as they watched me warily, as if they no longer knew me.
Shit, I wasn’t even sure I did.
But strangely, I didn’t mind. This was who I was supposed to be.
“Get Marina,” I told David, walking past him and out of the office. “I need a dress.”
I stood outside the cathedral doors, in the entryway, holding my arms out to give Marina room to work. My body was tugged in a dozen different directions as she pinned, sewed, and tightened the gown she’d given me when I was sixteen but never wore. It was the only dress we could find so quickly.
I stared at the closed doors in front of me. I hate him. But why wasn’t I more nervous? Why wasn’t I scared?
All I felt was anger. And drive. I didn’t care what happened to me right now. Let him do his worst.
“Can I put mascara on you?” Alex asked.
“Why not?” I mumbled. I rubbed my lips together, feeling the red lipstick she’d already dabbed on them. I wanted to look nice, but not for him. Something inside me was different. I wasn’t thinking about all the things I wanted to be anymore.
I just needed to be louder about it.
She worked on my eyes, adding some liner, and yanked the plug of the flat iron out of the wall, having finished curling chunks of my hair into loose waves.
“I have flowers for you,” Marina thrust a bouquet in my hands.
But I just cocked an eyebrow, staring down at the white roses. And then I tossed them off to the side, letting them land on a velvet bench. It was nice of her to go to the trouble, but she knew better.
I couldn’t hear anything happening inside the church, other than the echo of the odd kneeler being pushed up or down in the pews. Alex quickly dabbed more powder on my nose, probably still a little red from the attack before.
My body was still knotted from it. I hadn’t seen my father, Ilia, or the two guards, since I threw on my clothes and bolted from the house before he found out what went down. I wasn’t scared for myself so much as for David and Lev, who went against orders and protected me. We all dove into a car and drove away, Marina meeting us here shortly after, having snatched the gown on her way out.
I was actually grateful. To have the dress and Alex fixing my face. I felt armed. I wanted to be bold, not invisible. Not look how I always look, fucking apologetic and like I was always trying to make up for existing. I was here, and fuck ’em.
I waved Alex away, and grabbed my dress, lifting it up to walk toward the doors.
“What are you wearing?” Alex burst out.
I turned to see her looking at my feet.
I glanced down to try to see what the problem was.
My combat boots, some of the black scuffed off the toe, sat on my feet loose with the shoestrings untied, as usual.
“They match,” I told her and turned back around.
But I heard her heavy sigh behind me.
Dropping the dress, I pulled open the doors, not waiting for a cue. I hated formalities, and if Kai wanted to suffer so badly, why not just go to City Hall?
People lingered around the front of the nearly empty church, a few random parishioners in the pews toward the back. Everyone, one by one, stopped to stare.
I hoped my black dress made a statement. The bodice was charcoal and tight, leaving my shoulders and arms completely bare, while the white tulle was full around the bottom with a sheer black overlay.
Kai stood at the front of the church, facing Michael to the side, but his head was turned toward me. The dress was dreamy and beautiful, and I hoped like hell I looked good in it.
Without waiting for any music to start, I walked, fixing my eyes on the altar as I marched down the aisle. The room was silent, and I absorbed the heat of a dozen pairs of eyes on me.
My father sat in the front, but I knew he was going to be here. Hanson found me a while ago to sign the marriage license.
Michael stood at front, next to Kai, while Will and Rika were off to my left.
I could sense other bodies here, too, but I assumed they belonged to my father’s side. Once he calmed down and stopped blaming himself for not getting rid of me sooner, he must’ve realized that while I went into this marriage with nothing, I’d come out with my rightful half.
Or all of it if Kai should happen to get hit by an untimely bus.
A priest with white hair and glasses came out from behind a podium, noticing me, and moved quickly down the small set of stairs to stand center. He looked nervously to Kai, probably realizing how abnormal this “ceremony” was.
Kai uncrossed his arms and let his eyes fall down my form, a skeptical look on his face. Walking over to me, he nodded, and we both stepped up to the priest.
“You wore a dress,” he said under his breath. “Color me surprised.”
Ass.
But I gave the tall man in front of us a sweet smile, taking in his fancy white robe with gold embroidery.
“I’ve never worn one,” I replied quietly. “A gown, I mean. And since I’m only getting married once…”
“Oh, you’ll have plenty of opportunities to wear gowns, married to me,” he assured. “I plan on making this marriage as torturous as possible for you.”
But I shot back, tipping my chin up. “Go for it while you can. I’ll be a widow soon, I’m sure.”
I heard his quiet laugh at my side, but he dropped the banter as the priest looked beyond us to our pathetic guest list.
“Be attentive to our prayers, O Lord,” he rang out, opening his arms to everyone, “and in your kindness, pour out your grace on these, your servants, Kai and Nikova, who, coming together before your altar, they may be confirmed in love for one anoth—.
“Skip to the vows,” Kai gritted out.
The priest halted his script, looking flustered. I almost snorted. Poor guy. It was weird, though, hearing my name like that. No one used it, except my mom and Damon, and they called me Nik.
My father didn’t like Nikova, though, so I got used to using Banks. That’s who I was now.
The priest cleared his throat, taking a deep breath. “Kai and Nikova, have you come here to enter into Marriage without coercion, freely and wholeheartedly?
“I have,” Kai answered.
I hesitated but finally nodded, feeling the weight of my father in the room. “I have.”
“And are you prepared, as you follow the path of Marriage, to love and honor each other for as long as you both shall live?
“Yes,” Kai hissed, sounding in a hurry. “I am.”
My heart jumped. God, was this really happening? “Yes,” I replied.
I couldn’t detect Will behind me, and Michael was as still as stone, but I could hear Rika’s constant fidgeting on my left.
“Are you prepared to accept children lovingly from God and to bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?”
What? I shot my eyes to Kai, who simply stared at the priest with his eyebrow arched.
No fucking way. We might be here under false pretenses, but this was horse shit. I wasn’t even going to pretend to agree to that.
“Keep going,” Kai told him, and I realized he wasn’t having it, either.
I breathed a sigh of relief.
The priest looked down at his book, seeming flustered before stuttering on. “Since…since it is your intention to enter the covenant of Holy Matrimony,” he said, finding his voice again, “join your right hands, and declare your consent before God and his Church.
Kai turned toward me, and all I could do was lock my jaw, so no bad words slipped out. I faced him, and he took my hands, but I refused to close my fingers around his. Even despite the tingling that was shooting up my arms.
“Kai Genato Mori,” the priest began, “do you take Nikova for your lawful wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?
Until death…
He stared at me, his gaze faltering, and I saw a glimpse of the man sitting at his father’s table, telling me the story about steak.
And then he smirked. “Until death,” he specified. “I do.”
My lungs emptied, and I squeezed his hands only because I needed mine to stop shaking.
“Nikova Sarah Banks.” The older man turned to me. “Do you take Kai for your lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?”
I couldn’t believe this was happening.
He squeezed my hands back, signaling it was my turn to talk, and I pulled out of his grasp, shooting him a glare.
“Until death do us part,” I mumbled. “Which shouldn’t be long from now, so yes, I do.”
Kai smiled, laughing quietly at me.
Fuck you, it wasn’t a joke.
“May the Lord in his kindness strengthen the consent…”
The priest carried on with his blessing, and the rest passed in a blur as we exchanged rings, and the priest offered kind words to those in attendance.
The breath I’d been holding expelled, and I dropped my eyes. Shit.
We were married.
I glanced at Kai, both of us facing the priest again, and anger boiled under my skin. I’m going to be the worst fucking wife you ever have.
“Your kiss is your promise to each other,” the cleric said to Kai. “Go in peace to glorify your union, and you may now kiss your bride.”
Kai turned toward me, and my heart jumped into my throat, but…
But he didn’t stop turning.
He spun all the way around and charged off, back down the aisle from where I came, leaving me standing there like an idiot. I blinked long and hard, embarrassment warming my cheeks. Prick.
One by one, Michael, Will, and Rika fell in behind him, every one of his witnesses storming down the aisle and leaving the church. He didn’t look back, but I knew every other eye in the place was on me. The priest didn’t even know what to do. He just fucking stood there.
So, Kai was going to be the worst husband, too, from the looks of it. Slow clap for him. That was vile, and I was actually impressed.
