Daisy
“It’s not too hot, is it?” Ronan is holding my hand as I sink my toes into the water, my whole leg being swallowed up by lavender-scented bubbles.
“It’s perfect,” I reply. Just hot enough to feel the sting, but not too hot to hurt.
Of course when my ass hits the water, I’m singing a different tune. I let out a squeal as the hot water stings my tender backside, and I notice Ronan’s evil grin when I do.
“I’ll rub something on it after your bath that should help, but I can’t promise it won’t bruise.”
“I sort of hope it does,” I reply, resting my chin against the side of the tub.
“Why? You want a bruised-up ass?” He smiles, while grabbing a white fluffy towel from the cabinet.
“Sort of. Like a trophy.”
He freezes for a moment and closes his eyes before reopening them and taking a deep breath, which makes me laugh. I do like the idea of him leaving marks on my body, and I’m not entirely sure if that’s a good thing or not. That was my first time being properly spanked as an adult, and while I was a little terrified, it wasn’t because of the pain. I was more afraid of what it would do to our relationship. Would him punishing me make me resentful of him? Would it make him angrier, since he doesn’t like doling out punishment?
Clearly, neither of those things happened. While he had me pinned to the bed, his hand landing hard against my ass, I loved the thought of him making me pay for what I had done more than I ought to. Not all of our issues can be resolved with a spanking, but the fire that burned in that moment was like an inferno, and I don’t think I’ve ever been so aroused in my life—albeit a filthy, degrading sort of arousal.
It’s not something I want to feel all the time, and now I really need him to pamper me a little to make up for it, but the guilt and embarrassment of what happened earlier today is gone.
Hence the bubble bath and the doting behavior. Things between us went back to normal. For which I’m very grateful. I hated him being so upset with me.
I’ve never been in a relationship like this, one that feels so comfortable. Yes, Ronan acts like my daddy from time to time, but for all of the moments when he doesn’t, he treats me as his equal. He doesn’t laugh at me or talk down to me or treat me like I can’t do things. Our connection is refreshingly balanced.
And as much as I worried about it before, I know Ronan doesn’t think I’m too young or too irresponsible for him. All the fears I’ve had about him, he’s proven wrong.
Realizing that only reminds me I’m falling deeper and deeper into a relationship that is doomed to fail when he learns the truth.
The harsh reality is that I’m faced with two options now.
One, come clean about my mother. Eventually, it’s going to come out. If we truly stay together long enough, he’ll find out who my mother is, so I can’t hide it forever.
Two, I lie and pretend I know nothing. But that option makes me sick to even think about it. I hate lying. And just the idea of outright lying to him is unthinkable.
So, I have to be honest…eventually. And there’s a good chance that when I am, everything between us will change and he won’t want me anymore. I need to be ready for that, but I don’t know if I can truly prepare myself for that outcome.
I’m not just falling for Ronan Kade. I’m addicted to him. I crave him in a way I don’t fully understand. He doesn’t make the pain of my grief go away, but he does make me forget about it for a while. And when I’m with him, I’m not wading in the water alone. He’s right there next to me.
“Will you get in with me?” I ask, reaching a bubbly hand toward him. “This tub is more than big enough for both of us.”
He’s leaning against the bathroom counter, his arms folded in front of his chest as he stares down at me with a quizzical notch in his brow. He’s thinking about it.
Then, one by one, he unbuttons his shirt before sliding it off and starting on his pants.
When he’s naked, he slides into the hot water behind me, pulling my back against his chest, and I relax in his arms. We’re silent for a moment, the hot water calming us both.
“That wasn’t too much for you, was it?” he asks, referring to the spanking.
I shake my head. “Not at all.”
“How are you feeling now?”
Taking a long breath and a moment to think, only one word comes to mind. “Content.”
“Good,” he replies. “Is there anything else you’d like to try? Maybe something at the club that piques your interest.”
With my head resting against his chest, I give it some thought. Before Ronan, everything at the club sounded impersonal and intimidating. Now the idea of being in there with him changes everything. I adore the prospect of exploring all the possibilities, knowing that he will keep me safe and make me feel good.
“What do you like?” I ask, turning my head toward him.
“It’s not about what I like. I’m asking you.”
My face stretches into a smile. “Well, you have to have some tastes of your own.”
“My taste is watching the person I’m with get off, Daisy. If you get off with whips and paddles, I want to do that. If you get off when people are watching you, then I want that too.”
When I let out a small laugh, he turns my chin to face him. “What was that for?”
“Nothing,” I reply. “I just…don’t think you’d really paddle me. At least, I don’t think you’d like it.”
“You’re right. I wouldn’t.” He’s very blunt and matter-of-fact with his response.
“But you’d still do it?”
His features twist in thought before he licks his lips and gives me a pointed stare. “Would you ever let someone else join us? Someone who would like to do that?”
My jaw nearly drops to the floor. “Like a threesome?”
He pauses, his brows pinched inward. “Not necessarily. More like a scene. I think I’d love to watch, but I don’t know if I could be the one to do it.”
Goosebumps erupt along the flesh of my arms at the idea, and I try to control my excitement as I eagerly reply, “Yeah, I think I might like that. As long as it’s someone you trust. And they go easy on me.”
“Always at your pace, baby girl. I’d never let anyone hurt you.”
He presses my sweat-soaked hair back from my forehead, and I can’t help but ask, “That wouldn’t bother you? To see me with someone else?”
“Again,” he replies, “it’s not sex. But yes, the thought of you wanting to be with someone else does bother me.”
He dribbles water down my arm, watching the rivulets slide off my skin and into the soapy water, and I let his words replay in my mind. That was incredibly vulnerable of him, and as much as I loved hearing it, it drove this knife of guilt in a little further. As much as he portrays confidence and control, there’s a part of Ronan that feels insecure, which guts me to think about.
I reach for his fingers, squeezing them tightly in mine. “That would bother me too. But,” I say, kissing the back of his hand, “I don’t want anyone else.”
“No?” he asks so nonchalantly. “Not someone younger?”
My chest aches at that question. “No. Do you want someone older?”
He presses his lips against the side of my head. “No.”
Then I lean back against him, feeling his hard body wrapped around mine. “Close your eyes, Ronan.”
His head rests next to mine, his breath on my cheek. “Okay, they’re closed,” he says with a chuckle, clearly humoring me.
“Mine are too,” I whisper. Our fingers are mingled, rubbing and touching each other. Our legs are pressed together, and I can feel his heartbeat through my back, so we’re practically fused.
“Right here, in this moment, do you feel any different than me? Just because you’re older.”
“No,” he whispers in my ear.
Then he wraps our clasped arms around my body, squeezing me tight.
“It’s just years,” I say. “Who cares about the difference when it feels like this?”
“That’s right, baby girl.” His voice is soothing in my ear as he holds me.
We sit together in silence until the water cools, not saying another word and not touching each other more than this. I’ve never enjoyed silence with someone so much in my life.
Eventually, he gets out, drying himself before wrapping me up in a towel, our warm bodies pressed together. Then he lifts me like a child in his arms and carries me to the bed.
As we crawl under the covers together, I write another song in my head as I drift off to sleep. This one is about a man who looks good in hospital lighting and the weight of secrets so heavy, they nearly drown me in the bubble bath.
