Iwas crushed against the tile in the shower as Cruz was pumping into me from behind. His arms were wrapped around me, and one hand slid down my stomach, finding my clit. I moaned, pleasure rushing through me as I couldn’t even stand anymore. He was holding me up, but I didn’t think he was aware of it. Both his legs were planted between mine, and I was just skimming the bottom of the shower floor.
He was rolling over my clit, and I moaned, my head falling back against him.
His mouth dropped to my shoulder.
He kept pumping up into me.
This. God, this.
We’d come a long way from our first time. An impromptu study session in my room. I’d been horny. He asked to massage my ass, and I wasn’t about to turn that down. We ended up screwing twice that night. I almost smiled now, remembering how we sixty-nined each other first, but then a wave of pleasure shot through me, almost making me bend in half, or I would’ve if Cruz wasn’t firmly plastered to my back.
“Fuck,” he grunted in my ear. “You feel so good.”
I felt my climax coming, but I didn’t want it. Not yet. He always made me come first and held off for his. I started shaking my head, pushing back from the wall and into him.
He chuckled, that sound in my ear a caress by itself. “No way, babe.” He was playing my body, his fingers going slow and smooth, sooo slow and smooth over my clit.
Another thrust up, and he held–I screamed, my head hitting his shoulder, and I arched all the way up as I went over the edge. It ripped through me, and I was almost weeping from how good that felt.
I loved sex. There was nothing better in the world.
The sensations were still coursing through me, and I realized in a daze that Cruz was waiting until I was done. He had moved back a little so he was fully holding me up, and then as I let loose a deep sigh, as I could feel the trembling starting to wane, he nipped my ear. “My turn.”
I was switched in the air, my legs wrapped around his waist once again, from instinct. My arms came up around his neck, and he carried me out to his bed. I was beyond able to process, but I had the thought we were going to soak his bed when he dropped me down. He didn’t break contact, coming right on top of me. He reached over, getting a condom. Then he buried his head into my shoulder, slid in, and he was thrusting all for himself now.
He went hard, growling as he ground in for the last pump.
I held him tight, my legs and arms keeping him to me, and then he let out one last savage roar as he finished.
He lay on me for a moment.
Sometimes I didn’t mind this, sometimes I hated it.
Cruz was a nice guy. He could be a dick at times, but generally he was decent, but because of my baggage and the rules, we didn’t make a lot of conversation once the sex was done. Earlier had been an exception. I blamed the alcohol in me, or other stuff…
I waited to see what he’d do.
He groaned, rising and separating from me, but he only dropped down to the bed beside me. He had a hand on his stomach, his very ripped stomach, as he was catching his breath.
I still lay there, my mind very blessedly blank. For now.
After another few minutes, he frowned at me. “You want to go again? Usually, you’re getting dressed and out the door before I can pull the condom off.” He did just that as he was speaking, twisting to toss it into the garbage by his nightstand. He lay back down next to me, his gaze focusing on me.
I knew I should get going. It wasn’t good to be here when everything would catch up to me, because that’s what I’d been doing since leaving Fallen Crest. Keeping busy, drinking, the game, being around others, and now sex–all to keep the shit from my mom out of my head.
I felt the wall starting to crumble and sat up.
“Hey.”
I paused, staring at him.
Still frowning, he studied me a moment before sitting up, his hand going to the inside of my leg. “Stay a bit.” His hand moved in, finding my center, but he only teased me, running his fingers around me. “Guys are here. I’ll grab some food, and come back for round two?”
We could hear them in the house. Cruz’s room was on the back section of the hockey house. He had a decent room considering he was a freshman, with his own bathroom and that was realty gold in the hockey house. The drawback of his room versus my place was that if I didn’t want to slip through the house, running into his teammates or who else they invited back tonight, I’d have to slip out through his window and go around to the stairs that are attached on the side of the house.
But I considered his offer and knew better. “You’re going to go down there, get food, and the guys will pull you into their party.” Which meant, it was time to go. I sat on the edge of his bed, noting how he had the thought to throw down a giant towel before we landed on his mattress. I picked at it. This thing was huge and thick. “Where’d you get this thing?”
He laughed, laying back. “No personal questions, Daniels.”
I snorted, reaching for and pulling on my underwear then my bra before I stood and looked for the rest. “I didn’t know that was a personal question. My bad.”
“It is because my sister made it.”
He was right. That was personal.
I saw him grinning at me and couldn’t help but grin back. That was his effect, but not just on me. On everyone. Everyone liked Cruz, even if he was being a dick, they still liked Cruz. I blamed whatever star-power charisma he had going for him.
I tugged on my jeans, then my shirt.
“I drove you here. Need a ride back?”
“Uh…” I was looking for my shoes.
He sat up and reached down on his side of the bed. His hand came back up holding my shoes, and he handed them over. “Here.”
“Thanks.” I took them and sat back on the bed to pull them on.
I felt the mattress depress beneath me and looked over. He was standing, going to his closet.
I sat there, watching as he dressed, pulling on a pair of sweats and sweatshirt, not so much unlike the ones Miles wore earlier to his game. I hadn’t given him an answer, but I was seeing that he wasn’t giving me an option.
He grabbed a hat, pulling it over his head, before putting his phone and wallet in his pocket. His keys were last.
“Guess I’m getting a ride home?”
His eyebrows shot up in response, but that was it.
This was our norm, bare minimum talking. Once I was ready to go, he held the door for me.
There was an exit at the end of his hallway that went down on the outside of the house, but I was glad not to run into anyone else on this floor. The doors were closed or the few that weren’t, the rooms were empty as we passed by.
His roommates knew our deal, but I still tensed.
Cruz followed me in the hallway, out the door, and down the set of stairs to a gravel alley by their house. We passed the rest of the house; all the lights were on, and music could be heard from inside.
“Here.”
I would’ve gone past his truck, but he had parked it so we wouldn’t have to go past the front lawn. I could hear people out there so who knew who was all there.
Going around to the other side, I got in, and drew in a breath as I decided it was time to start handling some shit, no matter the time of night. I turned my phone on as he was reversing to the road.
“Hey!”
Cruz paused the truck and rolled down his window. One of his teammates came over, but I focused on my phone though I could hear him grinning as he asked, “Where are you two headed?”
“Dropping her off, then I’m coming back.”
“Sweet. We gotta celebrate tonight. Though it looks like you alr–”
“Don’t go there.”
I paused at hearing Cruz’s dark tone, starting to go through the first text that showed up and looked up, seeing AJ Atwater looking me over. Messy blonde hair, a slight curl to it, and wide green eyes. His face was a little long. Tall, and a little gangly, but I knew he wasn’t gangly at all on the ice. I could guess what he was going to say and gave him a look. “Don’t be a dick, Atwater. You spread shit about me, and there’ll be payback. Real easy to tell a few of the right girls you got an STD. You hear me?”
I did not play with this shit. Ever.
Guys were total assholes. Doing their best, coaxing, being all nice for girls to have sex with them. Then when they did, the worst ones ruined the girls’ reputation, disrespecting them. I liked sex. I’d been having it for a long time. It’s how I handled my life, but I was safe. I picked decent guys, and I liked what Cruz and I had. He got off. I got off. He didn’t disrespect me, and I wasn’t a girl who wanted to be a girlfriend. It would work until assholes like this started saying shit.
He swallowed hard. “Right. I mean…right.”
Cruz said, “Keep your mouth shut. You know the deal.”
Atwater stood back, straightening, and he nodded quickly. “Sorry. Honestly. Post-game celebrations got to me. Meant no offense, Daniels, but it’d be fun if you came to a party every now and then. I know you’re cool to hang out with.”
I relaxed a little and gave him a small grin. “Maybe next time?”
“Cool, cool.”
I went back to my phone as he and Cruz had a small conversation. I tuned them out, hearing Atwater ask him something about hockey because that’s how these guys were. One was a jackass. Threats were made, then bam, after the apology, back to their normal guy chit chat.
I scrolled through my texts.
My dad.
Kit sent another couple texts.
A few other friends from high school, the girls I hadn’t spoken to since graduation.
Then, crap. Tasmin Shaw. I checked the time. She must’ve texted me after the game, but I scrolled through and didn’t see any other surprising texts.
“See you, man.”
Cruz and Atwater were finishing up.
I put my phone away, still hearing it buzz from my notifications. I waited till we’d driven a block. “I’m not in the dorm anymore.”
He glanced over, but there was no reaction. “Okay.”
I gave him directions until we were outside my new place. He leaned forward, scoping it out. “I’ve been here before.”
“Miles Gaynor lives here. There’s a place in the attic.”
“You’re in the attic?”
I nodded before opening the door and sliding out. “It’s not that bad. Like a small apartment.” I headed off, giving him a wave.
He waited till I got in my door. Once inside, I paused and listened to the house. It was silent. I hadn’t noticed any lights on from outside, but I went upstairs. And after taking another shower, I dressed in my pajamas, grabbed a bottle of wine, and curled up on my little couch with it.
I needed more numbing.
