TEARS BLURRED my eyes as I watched Ryan stalk out of the room towards his bedroom. Krista rushed towards me with a wet tea towel.
I looked at her for guidance.
“Go give this to Jensen.”
I moved to Jensen’s side and touched his arm. His eyes softened when he looked at me.
“I have a wet towel.”
“Thanks,” he said gruffly. I watched as he blindly tried to wipe the blood from his lip.
“Can I help?” I asked.
He handed me the towel. I dabbed away the blood. Around us, the party started again. People resumed laughing and talking.
“It’s like they don’t even care.”
He managed a smile. “There is an old time saying, there was a fight and a hockey game broke out.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means if there is a group of people that are used to fist fights, it’s this crowd.”
“I don’t understand why guys have to fight,” I complained.
He shrugged. “It’s just how we settle things.”
“Are you okay?”
He nodded. “Yeah, but I think I’m going to head out.”
“Okay.”
“Want to walk me down to the lobby?”
“Okay.”
I made eye contact with Krista as we slipped out the door. We rode the elevator downstairs in silence. Once we got to the lobby, he motioned to the chairs near the fireplace. “Want to sit down for a while?”
“Okay.”
“I’m sorry for fighting Ryan at your party. My intention was never to get into a fight and ruin your night.”
“It’s okay.” I didn’t know what else to say.
“Zoey, do you think I have a shot here?”
My eyes widened. “What?”
“With you?”
“You want a shot with me?” I sounded like an idiot, but I couldn’t keep up with the events of the night.
“Yeah. I do.”
I dropped my gaze to my hands that clenched tight in my lap. “There are things you don’t know about me.”
“Like what?”
“When I met Ryan, I was living in a homeless shelter.”
“I know.”
My head snapped up. “You do?”
“Mica isn’t advertising that fact, but after I begged him to tell me anything he knew about you, he told me after swearing me to secrecy.”
“When I met Ryan, I was just barely hanging on. He was super nice and he let me crash on his couch for a night when I had no place else to stay.”
Jensen’s eyes held mine. He was listening, so I continued. “He gave me his card, and I got beat up in the street. I was hurt pretty bad, and he took me home with him. Bought me clothes, meds. Fed me. I couldn’t understand his kindness and generosity. He gave freely without asking for anything in return.”
Jensen’s jaw tightened.
I sighed. “Ryan is the first person in a long time who stuck his neck out to help me.”
“Your loyalty is with him.”
“Yes.”
“Is he treating you okay?”
I knew tomorrow this fairytale would end. “I will tell you something I have not told anyone else. Promise me you won’t tell anyone?”
“I promise.”
“I’m not sure how long I will be around.”
“Why not?” his gaze darkened. “Is it Ryan?”
I reached across and put my hand on Jensen’s arm. “You need to understand that Ryan has treated me better than anyone in my life. Someone from my old life has come back.”
“What do you mean? Another boyfriend?”
I shook my head. “No, someone bad. And I think I need to go before this situation gets ugly.”
His eyes widened. “Don’t.”
“I need to.”
“Whatever the situation is, I can help you.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“It can be.”
I sighed, conflicted. “It’s not something that can be easily resolved.”
“Then promise me you’ll talk to Ryan before you leave.”
“What?”
“Promise me. Don’t just leave. Promise me you’ll talk to him.”
I couldn’t.
Jensen leaned forward. “If you don’t promise, I will go back upstairs and tell Ryan myself.”
“You wouldn’t!” I couldn’t tell Ryan. It wasn’t even an option.
“This is important.” He stood up. “I mean it, Zoey.”
Desperation overcame me. I stood up and grabbed his arm. “He can’t help me.”
“You don’t know that.”
I did know that, but it would be a disaster if Jensen went back up to the party and tried to talk to Ryan. “Okay. I’ll tell him.”
He pinned me with a serious expression. “Are you telling me the truth? Do you promise me that you’ll tell him?”
I couldn’t lie to him. If I promised something, I’d follow through. “I promise. But I need a few days. I need to find the right moment.”
He gave me a tight smile. “That works for me.”
We stood there, looking at each other. Before me, stood a man who truly cared about me. I wished I felt for him what he felt for me. I wished I felt for him what I felt for Ryan.
“Can I give you a birthday hug?”
I nodded. He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tight. It felt good. Not as good as Ryan’s hugs, but it still felt like a friend’s hug should. “Thank you, Jensen.”
He stepped back. “Happy birthday.”
I gave a short laugh. “Thank you. This was the best birthday I can remember.”
“Even though I started a fight?”
“Already forgotten.”
He rubbed my arm and then walked out of the lobby.
I MET Krista’s eyes when I slipped back into the party. She moved towards me. Around us, everyone continued to drink and party.
“Everything okay?” she asked me.
I nodded. “Where’s Ryan?”
“He’s still in his bedroom.”
I looked around at all the people, who continued to drink and party.
“I want to go talk to him.”
She gave me a thoughtful look. “I think he’d like that.”
Without knocking on the bedroom door, I slipped into Ryan’s room. He sat on the edge of his bed. He wore a clean shirt that was open, revealing an expanse of hard muscles. He had two white plastic bandages over a cut that looked painful.
I moved to sit down on the bed beside him. He turned to look at me, studying my face.
“How are you doing?” his voice was gruff.
“I came here to ask you the same question.”
“How’s Jensen?”
“Fine, but he left the party.”
His eyes held true regret. “I’m sorry.”
I shrugged. “I don’t understand why guys always need to fight.”
“It’s how we settle things.”
“Are things settled between you and Jensen?”
He looked away from me, but didn’t answer. I knew I needed to talk to Ryan. I promised Jensen I would, but this was not the moment. Ryan felt too wound up, too tense, to share my problems with.
“How’s the rest of the party?”
I lay back on the bed. “Still going strong. Do you think they need us out there?”
Ryan lay back down beside me. “Not for a while.”
“It was a fun party.”
“What was your favorite part?”
I thought about that for a moment. “The cake and when everyone sang.”
Ryan rolled over, propping his head on his elbow, looking at me. “Anything else?”
I loved the way Ryan had pulled me onto his lap during the game. Those moments when his arms had been wrapped around me had made me feel things I had never felt before. “I liked the game.”
“Me too.” He grimaced. “Right up until the fist fight.”
“How’s your eye?”
“It’s fine.”
“I have to talk to you about something.”
He waited.
I took a deep breath. “But I’m not ready to tell you yet.”
“Whatever it is, you know you can tell me anything.”
Just the thought of bringing Ryan into contact with my old life, made my heart hurt. “I will. Just not yet.”
“You want to go back to the party?”
“Not really. Do you think we should?”
“Krista’s out there.”
“Let’s wait a few more minutes.”
“Okay.”
I WOKE up to Ryan coming into the bedroom. “What time is it?”
“Just after three.”
“Is everyone gone?”
“There are a few stragglers passed out.”
I struggled to sit up. “I should go to my bed.”
“Justin took your bed again.”
“He really likes that room.”
“That he does. You can sleep here tonight.”
“Can I borrow a t-shirt?”
He dug through his dresser and tossed me a soft green shirt. “All yours.”
I waited until he disappeared into the bathroom before peeling off my clothes and pulling on his shirt. Then I dove under the covers. I could hear the water running. Would he touch me again in his sleep? I curled up on my side, my back to him. I felt him get into bed beside me.
“Ryan?”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks for the best birthday I’ve ever had.”
“You’re welcome.”
“You didn’t have to do that, you know.”
“I wanted to.”
I snuggled deeper into the pillow. “I hope one day someone makes you as happy as you make me.”
THE SOUND of laughter woke me up. And then Bianca’s voice pulled me out of my warm cocoon. I lifted my head. I was alone in Ryan’s bed. I pulled on my skirt from the night and crept down the hallway.
Ryan and Bianca stood in the kitchen.
“You have to try this,” Bianca lifted a spoon to his lips.
“Oh man, that’s amazing, what is that?”
“Organic Saskatoon compote.”
“Give me another spoonful.”
She lifted the spoon to his lips. “This is a recipe from my grandma.”
“It’s so good.”
I didn’t know how I felt watching Bianca spoon feed Ryan, but based on the churning in my gut, it wasn’t a good emotion. It almost felt like he was consorting with the enemy.
“Just wait until you try it on your waffle,” she expertly spooned some onto his plate.
The rational side of me understood that Bianca was his PA. He needed to be friends with her, but it filled me with angst to see how easily they got along.
With practiced silence, I moved towards my bedroom.
“Zoey,” Ryan spoke my name.
I paused and turned around, pretending I was just noticing them. “Oh, hey.”
“Bianca made the most amazing pecan waffles. Come have some.”
“Oh, well, I didn’t make enough for three,” Bianca stood behind him, giving me the stare down.
“Oh, Zoey can share with me,” Ryan motioned for me to come closer. “Come try this.”
“It’s okay,” I said, moving to stand near the island.
He moved towards me and then he lifted his fork to my lips. Our eyes met as I opened my mouth. Tantalizing tastes exploded on my taste buds. I shut my eyes and moaned. When I opened them again, Ryan’s eyes were on my mouth.
“What is that?”
“Pecan waffles and Saskatoon compote. I came back from my run and Bianca was here on her day off cooking us breakfast.”
Bianca gave me another hard look from behind Ryan’s back.
“That was nice of her,” I lied.
“Ryan and I need to go over his website changes,” her eyes cut into me.
“I’ll leave you to it,” I backed away.
“You can stay,” Ryan watched me.
“I have some things to do,” I lied, moving towards my room.
I lay on my bed, conflicted about the promises I had made Ryan. I needed to talk to him and tell him about Terrance, I just wasn’t sure how.
I’d find the right moment. Maybe he’d agree that I needed to leave. What I knew for sure was that Terrance was not someone anyone wanted to get involved with.
