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Hopeless: Chapter 45

Tuesday, January 6th, 1998 6:20 a.m.

“Shh,” she says, brushing the hair behind my ears. We’re both lying on my bed and she’s behind me, snuggling me against her chest. I’ve been up sick all night. I don’t like being sick, but I love the way my mommy takes care of me when I am.

I close my eyes and try to fall asleep so I’ll feel better. I’m almost asleep when I hear my doorknob turn, so I open my eyes. My daddy walks in and smiles down at my mommy and me. He stops smiling when he sees me, though, because he can tell I don’t feel good. My daddy doesn’t like it when I feel sick because he loves me and it makes him sad.

He sits down on his knees next to me and touches my face with his hand. “How’s my baby girl feeling?” he says.

“I don’t feel good, Daddy,” I whisper. He frowns when I say that. I should have just told him I felt good so he wouldn’t frown.

He looks up at my mommy, lying in bed behind me, and he smiles at her. He touches her face just like he touched mine. “How’s my other girl?” he says to her.

I can feel her touch his hand when he talks to her. “Tired,” she says. “I’ve been up all night with her.”

He stands up and lifts her hand until she stands up, too. I watch him wrap his arms around her and hug her, then he kisses her on the cheek. “I’ll take it from here,” he says, running his hand down her hair. “You go get some rest, okay?”

My mommy nods and kisses him again, then walks out of the room. My daddy walks around the bed and he lies in the same spot my mommy was laying in. He wraps his arms around me just like she did, and he starts singing me his favorite song. He says it’s his favorite song, because it’s about me.

 

“I’ve lost a lot in my long life.

Yes, I’ve seen pain and I’ve seen strife.

But I’ll never give up; I’ll never let go.

Because I’ll always have my ray of hope.”

 

I smile, even though I don’t feel good. My daddy keeps singing to me until I close my eyes and fall asleep…


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