I closed the door, listening to the sound of the truck leaving behind me, and watched Holden.
Holden shifted on the couch. She noticed my solemn face. I rubbed my eyes, not sure if I wanted to have this conversation but knowing we had to have it.
“What is it?”
I blew out a puff of air and rubbed my face. Moving towards her, I opted to take the chair across from her. I slumped, my eyes closed.
“Edward got away.” My words were quiet, except they seemed to boom out into the room.
She stiffened, her eyes searching my face. “He…. got away?” She didn’t understand. I don’t think she wanted to understand.
I nodded and turned my head to look at her. “Somehow, in all the confusion, he slipped away. Baron said he was unconscious when he had turned to get Tessa out of the cage but Edward had disappeared when he returned for him minutes later. We thought we had all the mercenaries, but there may have been one or two hidden that helped him escape.”
She sat there, shaking. She pulled a blanket around her, bundling herself up before pulling up her feet so she could rest her chin on her knees and hide everything up to her head.
“He is dangerous, Shane.”
“I know.”
“And he will come after me again. He thinks I am this hybrid human-lycanthrope being. He doesn’t understand that I am not a wolf, that I cannot shift.”
I wanted to reach out and hold her, but I suspected she wouldn’t welcome me right then. “Yet you can talk via the Pack bonds. You smell just like a wolf to us – enough that you drove the Pack males wild.” I hesitated, and then continued even softer, deciding to lay all my cards on the table. “And my wolf says you are my mate. He has always wanted you. I have always agreed with him — I want you. Something is different about you — more than any other human woman I have met.”
We sat there, the room growing darker as night fell outside. Holden just stared at the floor while I watched her. I couldn’t take the silence any longer and I stood, moving towards the kitchen. I opened the refrigerator and took out a casserole dish.
“Lasagna okay?” I asked over a shoulder, diving back inside to pull out a salad. Not waiting for her answer, I placed both on the counter and turned the dial on the stove to preheat it. Turning back around, I leaned against the counter to wait for it to get warm.
Holden stared out into the room, her voice almost a murmur to herself. “My father always called me his pup. My mother would call me her miracle child. I never thought those endearments would be hints I was different.”
“What else did they say that seemed a little odd?”
Holden snorted. “I was a child, Shane. Much of what they said seemed odd. I remember them being so in love, and yet they never let me feel like a third wheel. They would finish each other’s sentences and seemed to communicate without words.” A small smile touched her lips. “They were always touching each other, little touches that showed how much they were in love.”
I nodded. Mate bond.
Her eyes widened. “They were bonded, weren’t they? They could talk in their heads like we do?”
I smiled, nodding. My mate was learning what it meant to be a lycanthrope. Her whole past was being rewritten as she learned about my world. I wished that Edward and his crazy issues hadn’t forced it on her like this. And yet, I wasn’t sure if there was a good way to get to this point.
The oven beeped, and I turned to place the dish in it, setting the timer for twenty minutes. I stared at the salad bowl, realizing that I had taken it out too early. I returned it to the frig, pulling out a beer instead.
“Beer? Wine?” I held the frig door open, looking towards Holden.
“Hot tea on the list?”
I nodded, shutting the door before filling the kettle and plugging it in to heat. I pulled out a tea bag and a mug from the cabinet.
This felt homey and yet tension filled the room.
I turned and looked at her, deciding to just come clean.
“I am a wolf, Holden.”
She looked at me, wary. “I know.”
“My wolf is certain that you are our mate. He feels that you could shift if you wanted to. I think that is what Edward was trying to force. You to shift. To activate the lycanthrope part of you.”
She stared back at me. “That is what I don’t understand, Shane. Lycanthropes, by definition, are both human and wolf. What makes me different? Why did he call me a hybrid, as if I was a different breed?”
Shit. She was right. I wasn’t sure what the difference was, just that Holden felt different to me from other lycanthropes.
Max. I searched for the doctor, finding him talking with Maggie and Sarah, his wife, at the compound.
I wondered when you would ask. The reply was instantaneous.
You should have just said something. So, what makes Holden different? What makes a hybrid different?
I could hear the doctor’s sigh across the bond. There’s not much difference, that we know. But there haven’t been that many hybrids and most of them have been male – and sterile. Holden not only isn’t male but also can breed, given the pheromones she was giving off earlier. Hybrid females should have an easier time carrying our young, since they won’t have the same urge to shift, if they can even shift at all. Which is one of the larger differences. We – lycanthropes – cannot breed with humans. We might breed with a hybrid, even if they cannot shift. They share our DNA, which would make it easier for them to have pups.
I interjected. So, she may not shift?
What Holden is, Shane, is unknown. One male could shift, but it was slow and painful. So much so he didn’t do it, outside of twice, the first time because something had frightened him into it. Another got stuck between wolf and human and they executed him. I am not sure if any of the others even tried.
Do you know if any of them had mates? I wondered if mate bonding would make a difference.
That caused Max to pause. I could imagine the wheels turning, the doctor accessing the vast information in his brain.
Good point. The response came slower. I don’t think any of them were. The researchers isolated them after they found the hybrids, so I would have to presume that, no, they didn’t have mates. He paused again. Are you going to bond with Holden? Are you going to mate bond with her?
I think I already have. With that, I closed the communication pathway, blocking the doctor. I knew that Max might otherwise have checked in to see how things were going if I left it open. And this, whatever it was between Holden and me, was only between the two of us.
Looking up, I saw that Holden was waiting, her impatience showing. Damn, that was rude of me.
“Sorry.” I raised my eyebrows in placation, twisting my mouth. “I was, well…. Talking with Max. I wasn’t sure of the answer to your question and wanted to ask him.”
“And?” I could see she was resisting jiggling her leg.
“And a hybrid is different because it is possible you may not shift, even though you have some DNA of a lycanthrope. Most of the other hybrids had been male and sterile. First, you are not male. And we doubt you are sterile. The result? We are not sure what you can do.”
“Sterile?” There was a touch of horror in her tone. I remembered that Holden had tried to have a child before, with Thomas. I sought to ease her mind, rushing over and taking her hand.
“Holden, Edward did one thing right. He gave you something that proved you are fertile and that you can attract other lycanthropes. Even though, I could have told you that, years ago. My wolf stood up inside me and wanted to make you ours back then. He thought you were our mate, but the human me needed to wait, to make sure. And then the war came, the explosion happened, and you got married because you thought I was dead.”
My thumb rubbed a soft circle on her palm, as I continued.
“There are no studies that explain you. We have found no one like you, that we know of. Except, perhaps, one of your parents. Given what you said about your father, the hybrid would have been your mother. Your parents conceived you. And you…”
I lifted her hand and placed a gentle kiss on her palm.
“You might have pups. You might not. But to tell you the truth, I don’t care. I have my nieces and my nephew. I want you, not your ability to breed. If we have pups, great. But I want you, Holden. I want to mate with you.”
Her eyes shone with tears, but her voice didn’t shake.
“How does one mate?”
I stood, rushing back into the kitchen to turn the oven down to warm and unplugging the kettle, before returning to her. Pulling her hand towards me, I lifted her so she stood up against my body. We moved through the living room and entered the bedroom, standing beside the bed. Dropping her hand, I cradled her face in my large hands and stared down at her.
“It entails making love with you, Holden. I have been looking forward to this moment for so very long. It means giving you everything that I am – the wolf, the man, the Beta and the Alpha parts of me. There is a lot of pleasure and a little of pain, because every relationship has these facets. But then the pleasure comes back ten fold.”
She looked up at me, her eyes wide. I lowered my head slowly, holding her face. I wanted to give her time to move, to put a stop to this if she wanted to. But if she didn’t, I would make her mine.
Mine! My wolf howled inside my head.
Yours. A soft voice whispered in response.
And then my lips touched hers.
Holden
Having Shane kiss me was like nothing I have ever experienced. Thomas was a good kisser, except there had been something missing. Something I never knew I searched for. I thought the thing missing was my fault. But with Shane, I found that it wasn’t me; it had been us. What had been missing was Shane.
Home.
He tasted like home. He felt like home, as I slid my hands around him, sliding them under his T-shirt and up his back, feeling the hard muscles there.
It didn’t matter that this man was not human. That he turned into a big, bad, furry wolf. All that mattered is that this was my friend, someone I could talk to, the one I had thought I had lost because of a stupid war.
I wanted to climb up him and wrap my limbs around him, holding him to me forever so he could never leave me again.
His lips left mine and moved down my neck, leaving a trail of kisses, before stopping at my shoulder. He took in a breath, his large body shuddering, before he returned to my mouth, his lips moving over my own. I opened my mouth, and he grabbed my bottom lip with his teeth before releasing it. One large hand slipped down to my ass, massaging the muscle there. My stomach quivered in anticipation.
I grew desperate to feel him, all of him. Pulling his shirt up, I grunted. He laughed, raising his arms up so I could push it up as high as I could. Shane was a large man and I couldn’t get it over his head. He laughed again and helped me, throwing the shirt into a corner before wrapping me in his arms again.
His skin smelled wonderful – warm and musky, like pine trees and fur. I rubbed my cheek on his chest, the light hairs tickling my chin. I heard his heart speed up, a growl building inside his chest. I smiled, sticking out my tongue to lick at a nipple.
Shane shivered and then groaned. One big hand came up to hold my head against him. I smiled again, knowing what he wanted. I latched onto the nipple and sucked, my teeth holding the small bud between them before releasing and sucking again.
He pulled on my hair, tilting my head back until his nipple came out of my mouth with a slight pop. He took my mouth, as if he was searching for something that he needed to find. I opened to him, my fingers digging into his back muscles. His kiss softened and his hands moved to remove my shirt before his mouth moved down to lick that area where my neck met my shoulder.
Now it was my turn to shudder.
He looked up at me and his smile was seductive.
“Mine.”
The word hung in the air as we delved into each other, learning what it meant to be soul-bound. Mated.
