I slam the door to Danny’s truck so hard his truck vibrates in response. I land on my heels, successfully landing without twisting an ankle on the frozen snowed lawn.
That was definitely hate fucking in there, and every second he buried his wrath inside of me, it only made me lust for him that much stronger.
My ass is sore, and my pussy throbs with pain because I only want to feel myself shatter one last time before I force myself to move on without him.
He wasn’t lying about punishing me tonight.
I walk away with tears flowing down my cheeks, a fraction of me pissed off that he did that to me.
I’ll never want to share what we have with someone else. He’s the only man that makes me feel safe and scared at the same time.
But I loved every second of it, which makes me cry even harder. My chest tightens when I reach for my spare key hidden underneath a large red pot of plants I keep next to my front door.
All I want to do is erase the past few months. I want to erase the night I lost my brother and my baby. And maybe the only way to erase the pain is to leave any association with this military life…for good.
I’m stuck in between; I’m hopelessly devoted, and I need to cut these ties from him for good…if I want a chance at a normal life.
I am so lost in my thoughts, I don’t hear Danny get out of his truck. I don’t hear his footsteps behind me, and now all I feel is his big hand stopping me from entering my front door.
When I try to swing the door open, he holds my hand tight, and I try to wrestle it out of his grasp.
I turn around to see that he’s only wearing a button up long sleeve and his slacks. He took off his top with all his medals, and now he’s staring at me with eyes reflecting an emotion I’m not sure I’m seeing right. His dark, sandy blond hair is messy, making him more attractive.
“What are you doing, Ari?” His question catches me off guard, and another tear escapes me.
My lips trembling, I stare back at him.
“I hate you.”
He grimaces when I spew out the words. He looks away from me, stunned, staring at the floor instead. He doesn’t let me go, though.
He licks his lips. “No, you don’t.”
“I do actually. Don’t you get it? I need you to leave me alone! I need to move on! And you’re not letting me!”
Maybe if I say these words out loud to him and to myself, things will start to change. I’ll manifest it into reality.
I’ll free myself from this sorrow. It’s everyone else’s fault I’m feeling this way.
“Let me move on because the more we do this, the more I’ll just fall back into you,” I plead once again.
“I’m sorry, but no.”
“Danny, let me go!” Finally, my hands are free, and I glare at him.
He’s so beautiful, I can’t look at him without feeling like I will melt away, even in intense moments like this.
“Someone taught me that instead of running from our problems, instead of letting them consume us, we have to learn to let go of the past.”
I snort, trying to hide my sorrow, raising my brow sarcastically as my eyes water. A hateful smirk crosses my face.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t save your brother. I’m sorry that you think of me as some fucking curse. I’m sorry I couldn’t stop Shane from hurting you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the bullshit that continues to haunt us. I should’ve told you, and I’m sorry.” He gets closer. I’m inches away from his chest. I can smell his intoxicating scent as I sniffle. I’m doing my damn hardest to keep myself standing when all I want to do is crumble to the floor. I tighten every single leg muscle to stay upright.
“I’m sorry. If you need to blame me for everything, if you need to burden me for all the horrible things that you’ve gone through so that you can live in peace again,” he tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear, “if it means my little angel can smile bright again,” he forces a smile like he’s begging me to return one with my own, still holding onto the strands behind my ear. Then I feel his thumb brush over my bottom lip gently.
“Then hate me,” he states simply like it’s easy for him. “Hate me because the love I have for you is enough to withstand all the pain we’ve endured together and the pain that we’ll continue to go through.”
My stomach swirls with magic as he continues to stare into my broken heart.
I’m crying even more grimly. I place my hands on his chest, and I’m about to embrace him because I think I know what’s coming.
“Don’t you fucking dare say it,” I cry out.
His eyes flash with tranquility as he stares into mine. My heart beats harder, thrashing.
“Damn it, Ari Natalia, I knew it from the moment I met you. I was ruined.” He clenches his jaw, cupping the back of my head, bringing me closer. “I lo—”
He freezes, and my eyebrows raise in confusion. My heart sinks like an anchor overcome by gravity when he stops talking. His eyes squint hard, and his whole demeanor tenses like a rock. He’s not looking at me anymore. Instead, his gaze is behind me, looking inside my dark house like he’s searching for something, on high alert. His eyes flash with worry.
“Wha—?” My lips start to move, confused, but then Danny’s eyes widen.
“Baby, move!” he barks out. He throws me to the side so hard I fall to the ground in a split second. My hip collides with the ground, and I yelp from the sensation. He forced me away from him with extreme purpose. My hand burns when I fall. The collision scrapes my skin off in a split second.
It all happens like a fever dream because a gunshot ricochets, and my ears are in instant agony from the loud ringing. I look through my messy black hair strands to see my worst nightmare.
The blood drains from my face when I realize Danny’s been shot. He falls to the floor, and I can’t see him anymore.
I can’t see where he was hit, but I know it’s somewhere by his chest. Maybe his heart.
My whole soul decimates into a trillion pieces when I realize we’re in trouble.
“DANNY!” The sound that comes out of my mouth bellows with hysteria. It echoes into the dreadful night, with nothing and no one to hear me. I scramble up, trying to find some balance and strength to move my way up from the floor, but I slip and fall, my knees colliding with the ground. I’m too fucking shaken, and I feel like I’m going into shock.
What the fuck is happening?
Footsteps surround us.
I turn to see the shadow that appears out of my house, and my eyes widen when I see a familiar face holding a gun.
“You?!” I gasp, and I can feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, my spirit leaving my body.
It’s her.
It’s—
Suddenly, my vision goes dark.
Danny can’t die! He’s been shot! He can’t die!
I start to thrash against someone’s hold; they’re covering my eyes with no remorse, and I smell something strong as I begin to breathe hard.
Is this fucking chloroform?!
“We fucking got him! We killed him!” a male celebrates with a manic tone.
“NO!” I cry out.
I kick my heels hard against my porch. I scratch my attacker’s arms and I know it’s a man. He grunts in response and throws my body more arduously to the floor with revenge. His knee digs into my chest, pinning me to the icy floor, and he grabs my hair, pulling my head up off the wood, then smashing it back down so hard I’m seeing stars. I almost go unconscious. I groan through heavy breaths, and I feel like I’m moving in slow motion.
But then my adrenaline finally starts to kick in, and I shout again in excruciating pain.
“Help! Someone help!”
The closest neighbor I have is two miles away from here, but I’m hopeful by some miracle someone will hear me.
“Danny!” I scream for the love of my life. My protector. I hope I can hear his voice again, telling me that he’s fine. But instead, the last thing I hear before I black out and succumb to the toxic fumes forced into my lungs, into dark shadows that have me traumatized…is another gunshot.
