My world feels like it finally makes sense again. The darkness doesn’t feel lonely anymore, as long as I have Danny by my side. I kept telling myself I accepted everything about him this past year just to throw it in his face.
Being taken from him and my life made me realize I never want to live without him ever again.
He’s the strongest man I’ve ever known, and I feel lucky every time he embraces me in his big arms.
He’s my home. Wherever he goes, I will follow.
“Lie down.”
We’re both naked. As soon as we got home, it didn’t take long for him to undress me as soon as we walked into his front door. All of my clothes are scattered across the hallway to the living room like a route.
He turned on his fireplace and undressed himself. He pulls off his belt, removes his uniform, and climbs on me.
“Mrs. Rider.” He kisses my forehead as he hovers over me. I stare at his chest where he’s been shot. There’s a massive bandage over it as he palms his hands on either side of my face.
“It feels weird to say it.” I look at the diamond ring on my left hand as I brush my hands on the left side of his face.
I’m still wearing the same dog tags he gave me when he proposed. They fall over in my hair, and he plays with them for a couple of seconds before he lets them go.
It’s late at night, and the fire from the fireplace keeps us warm. It stopped snowing, but it continues to freeze.
He grabs my hand and looks at the ring on my finger.
“You’re never taking this off,” he murmurs as he lets my hand go. He trails kisses all the way down my chest to my stomach. He stops when he sees the scar Nora and Shane gave me. I feel his beard skim over it before he plants a kiss on the fading scar, and my anguish falls into nothing.
Then, he pushes himself into me, slow at first. I moan loudly at the harsh intrusion. I was already wet and ready for him when we entered his house. The need to dominate me consumes him. He wants me to submit to him as always, and I will. But I’m not the only one submitting tonight, and I’ll show him that.
I feel so full, and I scratch his back as he pushes himself deeper inside me.
I grab his ring finger. I pull it into my mouth, sucking on his black wedding band, earning a growl from him.
“My husband,” I tell him.
After I was discharged from the hospital, Danny wasn’t kidding about not wanting to wait any longer. He called the courthouse while I was being taken to the hospital for rehydration, and after, he let Lori finish treating his gunshot wound.
We got married when we were discharged. It wasn’t easy finding a judge to marry us, but then they saw who was asking, and they were suddenly available on a holiday.
My mom bought me a white dress from Target, and it was perfect. I didn’t want a wedding. I wanted to be married to him. Finally start our lives intertwined, now that a huge chapter in our lives has closed.
My mother and Enzo Rooker were the only ones to attend our courthouse wedding.
But Danny promised me we would have a bigger one if I wanted.
He didn’t want his parents there, and I don’t blame him. They play a big part in his demons, but it’s still not my place to tell him what to do about his estranged relationship with them.
We’re on the same couch where we shared our first kiss.
The way he’s moving, it’s different. It’s like he’s savoring every second. He’s moving into me slowly and deeply, and I can feel everything. I can feel the head of his dick move in and out of my entrance.
He groans every time he pulls out and then pushes himself in.
“You’re so fucking tight…fuck,” he whispers as he kisses down my neck. He trails his tongue down to my chest and then takes my right breast into his mouth. He sucks on it hard, humming, and then puts my other breast into his mouth.
His movements start to speed up, burying himself deeper and deeper inside of me. When he pulls my waist closer to him like he’s starving, the way his fingers dig into my ass like he’s greedy to have all of me until I’m consumed by him enlightens more and more.
“Baby, you smell so good…taste so fucking good.” He breathes onto the skin of my neck, then he sucks on my nipple again as he moves inside me. Holding it tight in his palm, squeezing my chest, I throw my head back and close my eyes tight as his grip tightens.
The pain is world-shattering.
I’d let him do anything to me.
He keeps hitting the same spot deep inside of me, and I’m screaming, moaning at the top of my lungs every time he touches it, and my clit brushes against him.
He knows how to work my body every fucking time. He’s so much taller than me, bigger than me, and yet he’s careful not to actually hurt me.
Suddenly, he’s pulling me up, keeping his cock deep inside me as he shifts positions. He sits on the couch, facing the fireplace and television like he’s watching, and I’m on top.
I’m breathing heavenly, and he’s looking at me intensely right before he pulls the back of my head closer to his. His big hand grips me with desperation.
His eyebrows furrow when I lift myself off of him to tease him.
“Jesus Christ, Ari…” he growls with lustrous need. “Get back down,” he demands impatiently.
I smirk at his stunned anger.
His hands go to my waist, and he digs his fingers into my skin, forcing me to sit on his length, but I hold my ground.
“Promise me something?” I look at him, my lips curving into a soft smile. I can feel my cheeks heat, and the warmth from what I feel for Danny only spreads faster.
“Anything.” One of his hands moves down to palm my ass, and he cups it, grasping it like he owns me.
He wants me to ride him.
“Promise me you won’t ever hide the things you don’t like about yourself to me? I want the vulnerability and the sadistic parts of you. You can be every variant of yourself with me. I hope you know that,” I whisper. I reach out to feel his abs. Each of my fingers goes across his abs, down to his groin.
The veins near his lower stomach pop out, and I trace them with my fingers.
It’s important that he knows this. I’m not sure if he ever had anyone to tell him that he’s the most amazing man in this world, even with all of his scarred, haunted past.
I love all of him.
He swallows, and I can see his Adam’s apple move as he does. His chest rising and falling. Sweat flows down his chest hair, and I can feel myself growing clammy.
I don’t want him to treat me like I’m fragile. Ever since we got back to Iraq this past year, he hasn’t belittled me like when we first met.
When he returned home after his deployment, he was the opposite. He looks at me like a queen. Especially after we lost our baby, I don’t want to let Shane and Nora have this hold on me. I’m stronger than their hatred for me. I won’t let them destroy my future with Danny or my mental health.
“I promise you.” He moves his hand to my face, pushing my bangs behind my ear.
I bite my lip, and then I rock my hips into him, and he throws his head back onto the couch. I move my hips forward and back, and he tightens both ass cheeks, squeezing them hard.
I ride him, and all you can hear is moans and the fireplace crackling.
“Just don’t run. Because I plan on destroying your ass while you wear my hands like a choker necklace until you black out.”
He gave me a taste of that in his truck after the military ball. The thought of getting choked out was horrifying, but why am I so fucking intrigued? Why does it only turn me on, sparking a desire so hot inside me? If he thinks he can spook me, he’s only heightening my curiosity.
“Choking me out completely?!” I squeak out and stop moving. He grins sinfully before he flips me over so that I’m no longer riding him. I’m facing the end of the couch, my ass in the air, and he pushes my head into the cushion. My cheek glides on the soft fabric, my teeth sink into my lip. “Let me see you come for me.”
I think I gave him the green light to welcome his darkest desires. And I’m so ready.
He drives himself inside me, and instead of grabbing my waist for balance, he grips the back of my hair like a leash, and my head is the collar. His chest on my back.
“On second thought, maybe you should run. My ranch has lots of land, and I would love to see you try it. Because when I catch you.” He pulls my hair harder, causing me to cry out in pain and lust. It drives my head to be pulled backward, and I hiss from the tug. He keeps thrusting himself inside me as he grips my hair.
“You’ll pay the price, Mrs. Rider. You’re my wife. And there’s no escaping the devil, little angel. You’re in my hell now.” He picks up his pace, pulling my hair toward him so he can fuck my pussy ruthlessly with no regard for my threshold.
I’m whimpering, moaning into the air as he unleashes more strength onto my body as he rails me. My body shakes from his greed to fuck me rough.
Then I hear a loud grunt drift into the living room. He roars with satisfaction as he comes inside of me. He lets go of my hair as his last thrust moves in and out, emptying himself completely.
“I can’t wait to see you carry my child again.”
We’re lying on his living room floor and Danny has me lying on top of his chest. My cheek lies on top of his hourglass tattoo. I touch the Latin words, trailing them like a puzzle.
My God, this man is too beautiful.
His hands play with my back, and he kisses my head.
We just finished round four, and it’s nearing two in the morning. I’m exhausted, but this feels like paradise. It’s a beautiful start to our honeymoon. Admiral Ravenmore granted his team a month of leave after taking out Omar.
Danny made him pay.
There’s no one else I’d rather be married to.
I love Kane, but Danny owns my heart and soul.
As Kane pops into my head, our last moments together flash through.
“My favorite nurse lies in a bed this time. I get to be the SEAL that impersonates one…this will be fun.” Kane plops down on a chair next to me.
Danny left to get me new clothes and take care of our upcoming wedding. He’s been the best fiancé I could ever ask for, but his friendship with Kane will never be the same. They like each other enough to stay on the same team, but they will never again hang out like they used to, and that sucks.
“What are you doing here?” I close my thriller book, placing it on my lap, and study him. He’s dressed in a dark blue sweater with the same beanie he wore that night we played soccer together.
His warm smile disappears, and I glare at him. I love him…but my heart belongs to Danny.
He sighs, and I notice that he hasn’t shaved in a while, leaving stubble over his sharpened chin.
He intertwines his hands, resting his forearms on his thighs that are spread apart. I cross my arms over my chest, hugging myself.
“I’m sorry, Ari. That’s why I’m here. I’m here to let you know that I’m sorry.”
I nod, giving him a cold expression. I don’t know what to say…I’m scared I’ll say the wrong things, and I’ll hurt him further. I’m so in love with Danny, and if he didn’t feel the same way for me…it would hurt. Words wouldn’t be able to describe if our love ended…so I feel like I get an idea of what Kane is feeling.
“But I’m not sorry about being in love with you. I think I’ll always be in love with you.” I take a deep breath when he says it again. I break away from his gaze, and I do my best to refrain from blushing. I tense up because a part of me loves Kane too…just not like how he needs me to be with him in return.
“And that’s okay, because at the end of the day, I just want…” He shakes his head. He licks his lips, and my heart skips. He grabs my hand, gripping it gently. “No, I need you to be happy.”
I chew the inside of my lip before I let myself relax. He’s always been there for me, and we’ll always have a relationship. But I know my boundaries, and Danny will have no problem reminding Kane of his. He almost killed Kane at the military ball if it hadn’t been for Rooker.
“Well, I am happy, Kane. Danny makes me happy, but so do you. Just in different ways.” I squeeze his hand back before pulling my hand away…letting him go.
“I know.” He clenches his jaw, and then his dark blue eyes flash with hope.
“Do you accept my apology?” he asks, smirking.
I chew the inside of my lip.
“Of course. Just don’t bite me again, or I’ll kick your ass,” I threaten.
“Is that a promise?” he teases.
I roll my eyes playfully before laughing. I point to the door to my room, ordering him out.
“All right, get out, Mr. Slaughter.”
He chuckles before pushing himself out of the chair, surrendering.
“Fine.” He sighs sarcastically. He knows this will be the last time we’ll ever be alone again together. He reaches for the door, and I grab my book, tempted to dive back in. It’s nearing the end of the book, and I can feel a plot twist coming.
“Goodbye, Ari Alvarez.” His soft voice flows like an airy rose, and I meet his dark cobalt blue pools.
His eyes are sad, but his smile is sunshine like it always is. He holds onto the doorknob, one foot in and one foot out of the exit to my room.
Nurses and doctors pass by him in the background, giving me a bit of déjà vu.
“Goodbye, Kane Slaughter,” I tell him, returning his sunshine with my own.
My fingers track the edges of his hourglass tattoo. A skull sits at the bottom, and I repeat the Latin words repeatedly in my head, and a part of me feels like I’m back in Iraq with him the first time I saw it.
His fireplace continues to crackle. I’m finally at peace, and I didn’t have to sleep or drink countless wine bottles to achieve it. I’m warm.
Danny is the fire I constantly keep burning myself with.
Usually, when you play with fire, you get burned and don’t do it again. But Danny makes the pain feel good and normalized.
He holds me like I’ll never shatter again, and if I do, he’ll be there to find every piece and put me back together.
“You have a thing for cherries, don’t you?” My eyebrows raise when I realize there’s more to his first nickname for me.
“You caught that?”
“Tell me why.”
He clears his throat, his hand palms the edges of his beard, and looks at the fire behind me as he continues to massage my shoulder blades.
“I had a v-very lonely childhood. No siblings. No cousins. Work on my dad’s properties, mixed martial arts, and shooting ranges was all I knew growing up.” He stops drawing circles on my shoulder blades, and I glance at him.
“My maternal grandmother was the only person that would make me feel…normal. Like it was okay to be a child and not grow up so fast. She passed away when I was in high school.”
He sighs.
“Once a year, we would visit her. Every January, we would drive up to her house on the lake, and she would always have freshly baked cherry pie. She said it was for her favorite grandson. Granted, I was her only grandchild, but…it was the only glimpse of normalcy I had in my entire life… a cherry pie was the one thing that made me feel like I was deserving of love.”
My throat constricts when he lifts my chin to meet his ocean eyes.
“Until you came along. You make me feel like I deserve more.”
I blink fast, trying hard not to fall apart. “I wish I could have met her.”
He pushes my hair back, stroking the side of my head repeatedly. “You were always there all these years…”
I reach over and tangle my hands in his hair, kissing him and he kisses me back softly while gripping my jaw hard.
“Danny?” I break our kiss. “Don’t leave your team for me.”
He goes rigid, and he stops holding me. I sit up so I’m now beside him, and I’m blocking his view to the fireplace. He merges onto his side, lifting his head onto his palm, looking at me intensely.
“If you’re going to leave the Navy or whatever it is, do it because you feel like that’s the best choice for you…not for me. Because I’m not going anywhere, my love. When I said yes, I meant it. I’m not going to lie, though. This life is frustrating and, most of all, terrifying, but I need you to know that no matter what you choose to do. I’m here. I’m not leaving you ever again, I promise.”
“I don’t need you worrying about me all the time. I don’t want you in danger anymore because the longer I stay in the Navy, the more I put you at risk.”
“I understand, and I’ve accepted it. But the military needs you. You help people just like I do. It’s our job.” I pull the blankets higher over my breasts. “Those children you saved…Violet…me.” I point to myself, and his blue eyes soften. I have his full attention, and his jaw ticks.
Grabbing my hand, he brushes his finger over the giant diamond that sits on my hand. He stares at the ring on my finger, and then he scoffs. He crawls, moving his knees on either side of me, and pushes me back down on the pillow beside the coffee table.
“You’re smart, too beautiful, you know that?” He pulls me in for another kiss before he rips the blanket off me. My nipples harden and graze against his chest when he closes the distance. His beard tickles my skin, and I moan when I feel him push into me again, and I claw at his back as he picks up his pace.
Oh, God.
He feels so damn good. Round number five, in less than twelve hours, takes off, and he grips my jaw, forcing my head off the pillow. He kisses me, whispering I love yous against my mouth the entire time.
