When I left Rome’s apartment to walk down the hall to mine the next morning, I wasn’t prepared for Vick to be sitting at my small table like a sergeant.
She greeted me with as much venom as a blonde fairy could muster. “Well, I was right. You look like shit.” Then, she shoved a thermos of coffee my way because, truth be told, Vick couldn’t be rude to anyone for long.
I also had a hard time being rude to anyone and could never turn down caffeine even if it came with an insult. So I mumbled, “Thanks.”
“Katie will be here any minute. You want to talk about your walk of shame?”
I took a long drink of the scalding hot coffee and then lied through my teeth. “It wasn’t a walk of shame. I just watched a movie over there.”
“Fine. But Katie’s right. You are a terrible liar.” Her honey-colored eyes said everything she felt about me and Rome.
Katie barreled through the door at just the right time.
“Saved by your warrior princess,” Vick mumbled.
“What the hell are you going on about?” Katie asked as she threw her keys on the counter and beelined for the coffee pot.
Coffee addiction ran rampant through my friends.
“She doesn’t know.” I waved away Vick’s comment. “Are we starting this early?”
Vick put some music on her phone and pulled out a chair for me. “You bet we’re starting this early.”
I groaned and fell into the chair that would be my torture chamber for the next few hours.
“Don’t worry, I will somehow make this mop look like it did once upon a time.” She picked at my messy bun as if it was diseased. “Katie, go get my hair kit bag. I left it in Brey’s bathroom yesterday.”
I tried to jump out of the chair. “You never said we were going that far! That hair kit bag has things in it that will keep me tied down here for days, Vick!”
Vick shoved my shoulders down to keep me seated. “Don’t be dramatic.”
Katie laughed as she walked down the hall. “Coming from you, that’s rich, Vick.”
Vick ignored her. “Your hair is a disaster, Brey.” She motioned for me to move the chair over to the sink.
Reluctantly, I did. Katie handed over her bag and she dug through it while I told her, “Just wash it. You can’t cut it today anyway.” If Vick brought out that bag, I figured that’s what it meant. She’d cut hair part-time while in undergrad. Now, she was focused solely on completing her law degree.
“Cut it?” Vick shrieked.
Katie winced. “Brey, remind me how we ended up becoming friends with someone who can’t hear how loud she is. Have the neighbors complained about you having her over yet?”
I snickered because after only a month in the new apartment, I’d received a complaint.
Vick just waved her off. “Someone has got to be vocal about her hair being the perfect length, Katie, and we all know it isn’t going to be you.”
Katie snorted and for good reason. She sported a pixie haircut with black-and-lavender highlights. It matched her bold, take-no-shit attitude.
“Sure. I know, you both don’t care,” Vick continued. “But guys love long hair. You can’t cut it, Brey. You can, however, never put black temporary dye in it again.” She squirted about ten different products in my hair and then leaned my head back into the sink to start scrubbing.
“That feels much better than I would have thought today. I need this every day after a hangover.” I sighed in bliss.
“Yeah well, from my end, this is absolutely gross.” I looked up to see the temporary dye smeared up on her wrists. “No offense, Katie. You pull it off just fine but Brey has the most gorgeous natural hair color, and quite frankly, I don’t know what your natural hair color is.”
“Neither do I,” Katie deadpanned.
I started to giggle when I felt Vick pause and hesitate. Vick reminded me of a roadrunner on speed when she talked. She couldn’t even keep up with the words that were coming out of her mouth half the time, so she’d shoot off something offensive and catch herself too late.
Katie and I actually loved that about her, but it didn’t mean we wouldn’t give her hell for it. And Katie was never one to pass up a joke about not knowing her mother. She loved making everyone else feel awkward. Growing up with her, I was immune, but Vick still tiptoed.
When Vick realized Katie and I were barely containing laughter, she yanked my hair a little too hard as she wrung out the water and started to towel dry it. I let out a yelp. “Serves you right. Why I keep you two brats in my company is beyond me.”
Katie shrugged her shoulders, still laughing. “Vick, it’s just too easy.”
“Yeah, well, be happy I’m not doing your hair today. Brey, remember I am doing your hair and you have to hang out with the equivalent of America’s royal family.”
That killed the mood. Katie grumbled something along the lines of “who gives a shit” because she’d grown up around them too.
I spoke up with, “Don’t remind me.”
“I know from both of your stories that he’s an ass. I get it, and I’m not even saying he’s worth your time, but don’t you want to look so good that you knock him on his ass when he sees you?”
Katie stopped her. “She’ll already knock him on his ass without all this.” She swung her hands around the room. “I’m telling you, Vick, he could never take his eyes off her. He—”
“That was years ago, Katie. Honestly, I just want to look good enough for Jay’s graduation and for him. He has to be seen with me, and who knows what the paparazzi will come up with this time. Can we get this over with?”
They exchanged looks as if battling with what they wanted to say. I knew how it went. We all had our weaknesses, and they knew mine was the Stonewood family, a specific Stonewood to be exact.
“Well, I’ll reiterate, you should never cover up this dark auburn color. It looks fantastic and it’s really hard to achieve. You could ruin it by continuing with the temporary dye.” She shoved a piece of it in my face as if I didn’t know my real hair color. “Did you know the chemicals in—”
“Vick!” I winced at my own loud voice. “Can you save it for a different day?”
She rolled her eyes. “You shouldn’t be hiding this hair or that body of yours.” She continued on as if I hadn’t just asked her to stop. “The fact that you have the greatest ass in the state and work to keep it should be evidence enough that you shouldn’t be wearing clothes that hang to the floor. No one can tell that you even work out.”
I snorted at her ludicrous way of thinking. Vick worked with what God gave her. And boy, did she know how to work it. She looked like a sex kitten everywhere she went, and it got her a lot of attention. She didn’t understand how someone could not want that attention.
I could try to explain to her why I didn’t want to be noticed, that being noticed for the wrong reason and being a local celebrity for my father’s crime wasn’t exactly rainbows and roses. But Vick was different in a brilliant, blinding way. She would have probably taken that tragedy and turned her life into a reality TV show.
For a few more hours, I submitted to Vick’s torture of getting ready.
I submitted to my hair being curled. I submitted to blush and eye makeup being put on. I submitted to Vick complaining about being a hairstylist until she could merge into the legal field. I even submitted to a rub-on tan while Vick whined about getting an A minus on her last exam.
After one hour, I wanted to scream.
After two, I definitely did not want to put on the strapless flowy dress Vick picked out for me with wedge sandals.
Three hours in, I wanted to kill Katie because she was trying to ditch with some excuse about having to go to another pre-commencement gathering. I knew it was a lie. Vick mentioned Rome was coming to get us, and she practically beelined for the door.
“You told me we were walking, Brey!” she accused when Vick informed her.
Vick snapped her head around to bug her eyes out at Katie. “You think I’m walking all the way to the ceremony in these heels?”
I sighed. “Vick, take it down a notch.”
Katie and Vick started to bicker over how walking would be just fine. I smiled at their useless argument as I examined the specimen that stared back at me in the mirror.
She didn’t look like me. She looked happy, light, pretty. Her hair fell below her chest in soft waves, shining a little hint of dark red when the light hit it just right. Her green eyes popped a little more as if trying to win the fight for the most attention against the long hair. The pastel-colored dress she wore clung in all the right places, flowing out just above the knee.
I sighed, realizing Vick had done her job. I would look the part, and I was thankful for that. I wanted to look as though I could hold my own in front of the equivalent of America’s royal family. Today, after gruesome hours of hard labor, I guess I looked it.
“I’m leaving,” Katie chimed from behind me.
I looked over my shoulder through the mirror to meet her eyes.
She must have seen my panic because she wrapped her arms around my waist and squeezed the life out of me. “You look hot as fuck, best friend. I promise you’ll get through this and if he makes it difficult for you, you tell me and I’ll gut him like the floppy fish he is.”
I squeezed her wrists. “I can walk with you. We don’t have to go with Rome.”
She rolled her eyes. “I hate the guy.” Her voice got loud enough for Vick to hear. “Don’t know why you two hang out with his dumbass.”
I snickered. “You told me to hook up with the hot bartender when we first met him.”
“That was before I knew he was the owner of said bar and an egotistical ass.”
I sighed. “I’ll walk with you.”
She shook her head. “He’s an ass but Rome will look good on your arm today. Plus, you guys have killer chemistry. It’ll make Jax sick.”
I rolled my eyes this time. The woman was evil.
She swung open the door on her way out just as Rome arrived.
Their usual stare down happened. Rome raked his eyes over her body like he did with every woman, and honestly, Katie could have a sign that said Keep Away or I’ll Shoot You on her shirt with holstered guns strapped to her, and men would still look. She surpassed Vick’s sex kitten and my blandness by miles. With her combat boots, cut-off black top, and denim shorts that left little to the imagination, she looked like a badass Tomb Raider.
Although we didn’t know her ethnicity, we knew it was a phenomenal mix. Her eyes slanted a little and their gray color contrasted nicely against her caramel skin. On top of that, she rocked a Victoria’s Secret model body with a little less height.
Rome and her didn’t get along but he eyed her up like he wanted to eat her alive. He leaned on the doorframe, blocking her exit. “Going somewhere, Kate-Bait?”
“Yes. So, move.”
He flicked his gaze to Vick, not listening to Katie at all. “I thought I was driving all of you.”
Katie didn’t wait for Vick to answer. She just shoved him hard enough in the shoulder to slide past him.
He smirked as her body grazed his and grumbled, “What a waste.”
She mumbled something along the lines of him being a dirty asshole. Then she was gone.
Rome snickered to himself at his own antics.
When he looked up, the hours seemed worth it. His jaw dropped open so wide, I almost asked if he was trying to show us something in the back of his throat.
He growled and moved toward me. “You look hot and fuckable. You sure we have to go to this graduation?”
My eyes bulged as I snapped my neck around to see if Vick had heard him.
“Vick’s in the next room, Brey,” he whispered. His hands slid around my waist, and he was already licking my ear.
I slapped him on the shoulder, and then slid my hands down to his chest. “I told her we aren’t sleeping together anymore.”
His jaw ticked as he pulled back from me. “Is that the truth? We stopping this?”
I sighed. “I don’t know. Do you want to?”
He eyed me up and down. “Absolutely not.”
“Rome, are you thinking with your head and not something else?” I smirked and looked down.
“Brey, I’ll stop if you want. We do it because it’s a release for both of us. I care about you and you know that, but I can’t do relationships. Every girl I sleep with knows that. If you’re thinking that you want a relationship …” He trailed off, looking heartbroken.
I placed my hand on his chest and sighed in relief. His words were the comfort I needed to hear. “Vick keeps making me think you may want something more like a relationship, and then I’ll hurt you or you’ll hurt me. I can’t do more than what we are doing now either. I like what we have.”
“Vick’s just being over protective.”
“She protects our little crew even before there’s a problem.” I laughed as Rome cringed like he hated being a part of it.
Things were good between us. We reveled in each other sexually. Yes, Rome could have other women, he did have other women.
I liked that. I liked knowing I wasn’t anything special to him and he knew he wasn’t special to me either. He was just safe and hot and easy. He’d been the only other guy I’d trusted myself with and the only one who hadn’t hurt me.
Was I close enough for him to hurt me? No, but that was the point.
Because, today, I was facing the one man who’d hurt me the most.
We were in the car, about to face my worst nightmare.
I had to see each and every Stonewood today.
I had to see my heartbreak. My first love. My ultimate ruin.
Jax Stonewood.
Thankfully, Jay had requested tickets for Vick and Roman, also. We were the first to show and it gave me a moment to get my bearings.
“Vick, you sit on this side of me and Rome you sit on this side.” I motioned as I took a seat.
“Seriously?” Vick looked at me, hands on hips. “You look cute as hell. Leave this spot open and hope he sits down right next to you. Make him sweat it out. You have nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“Cut her some slack,” Roman grumbled and looked at me like I was pathetic. He plopped down next to me and swung his arm over my shoulders. “Want me to act like your boyfriend?”
Vick huffed. “You two might as well be dating. You eat together, you watch horrible television together. I also know for a fact you are still sleeping together …”
I flinched. “Vick, come on! You know that is none of your business.”
“Why the hell not?” Her arms flailed along with her blonde ponytail. “You’re my best friends and you guys are barring yourselves off from real relationships so you both can wallow in your past fucked-up ones.”
Rome stopped her by leaning forward and glaring at her. His glare stopped traffic if it needed to. “Vick, not your business. We’re all fine. No one’s getting hurt. So leave it alone.”
Vick’s ponytail swished through the air like a white flag, giving up for now but letting us both know she didn’t agree as she slammed back into her seat with her arms crossed.
I tried to relax under Rome’s arm and let the sun warm me while we waited. The breeze kept me cool in my light sundress and rustled the budding trees.
We should have all been enjoying the comfortable weather while we waited for the ceremony to start. Instead, people buzzed through the seats, trying to get the best ones, and the graduates sat as straight as they could, sporting their caps and gowns.
I searched out Jay. I smiled to myself as I saw him talking to the person next to him and then that person laughed along at whatever he’d said. Jay deserved this moment more than anyone I knew. He’d never stopped making everyone around him laugh even as he studied through school.
Roman whispered in my ear, “You gonna miss him?”
“Like the deserts miss the rain.”
He laughed, shaking his head. “Sade?”
“I only quote the best.” I patted his leg. “You’ll miss him too. He’s been just as good of a friend to you as Vick and me.”
“And I’m barely either of your friends at the moment,” Vick mumbled at my right.
“His filming in LA starts in a few weeks, right?”
I sighed. “Don’t remind me. I’ll barely see him.”
Rome squeezed my shoulder. “If you need me to, I’ll go to his movie trailer and drag him back here.”
I shrugged. “If not, we’ll just have to go see every rom-com he’s in for the next two years.”
“He’s booked for two years?” Rome’s voice went up in disbelief.
I nodded. “He’ll come visit. He’s starting to get time off when he asks for it.”
Vick and Rome didn’t look convinced.
“I’m serious! After being in three blockbuster movies, they have to give him time off set to decompress.”
Vick nodded, staying positive. “You’re totally right.”
Like a breeze bringing in a storm, whispers started to travel around me. Goose bumps formed on the back of my neck. My heart raced as if my body was preparing for battle.
As I turned, I knew who I would see, but bracing for an explosion never worked.
The Stonewood family walked toward us from a distance. The crowd that buzzed before, rumbled with excited whispers.
Celebrities were in their presence. Men in suits fanned out around the family, and although it wasn’t obvious, I knew they were bodyguards.
Nancy Stonewood stood at her estranged husband’s side, a small smile on her lips as her dark hair waved in the wind. She wore a white dress that matched Senior Stonewood’s white tie. As she looked up at her husband, his blue eyes twinkled like he held the secret of the world and shared it with only her. She smiled like she knew it too.
Jax and Jett walked beside them, sunglasses shielding their gorgeous eyes. Both were dressed in suits that probably cost more than my entire wardrobe. They mirrored each other with their dark hair and sun-kissed skin. Jett stood stiffer, like the weight of the world rested on his shoulders.
Jax, on the other hand, moved like molten lava. I knew firsthand how dangerous it was to be in his presence. He warmed everyone he passed, could make them feel alive. And yet, if someone got too close, he’d singe them. He didn’t carry weight on his shoulders, he swallowed it all up and formed it into a power to wield as his own.
I crossed my legs as they all made their way over to us, and I reminded myself that I hated him. I hated everything about his confidence and the attitude that made him not worry about a thing. It allowed him to leave me behind to become a rock star who slept with another woman every night without a second thought. It was that attitude that had made him a billionaire mogul investor who could get whatever he wanted.
I stood to greet them as they neared. Nancy Stonewood rushed forward.
“Brey, you look beautiful.” Her hand ran through my hair. She pulled me in for a hug. “I always loved your natural hair color. Keep it, okay?”
I smiled as I hugged her back. “Nancy, you told me you liked my dark hair.”
“Honey, I lied,” she whispered, pulling back to look over at my friends. “You all look so good. Much better than the last time I saw you.”
All three of us threw glances at one another. Last time Jay bought us all a little too much wine. Vick faced it head-on. “Ugh, I don’t remember a thing from that night, Mrs. Stonewood.”
“Me either.” Her candid, bright response had us all laughing hard enough that I forgot about who was around.
She moved to hug me quickly again. “Lunch soon?”
I smiled. “Sounds perfect.”
She winked. “I’ll see you all tonight.”
I moved to shake Senior Stonewood’s hand. “So good to see you.” I emphasized each word and stood tall, letting the mannerisms from family breeding take over because Senior Stonewood scared formalities out of everyone.
His blue eyes held the wisdom and power of one of the most lucrative businessmen in the world. Everyone shrank away under his cold stare. I’d only seen his expression warm for one person and that was Nancy. He was a man of few words which he only chose to speak to Nancy. He was also a man nobody dared say more than a few words to.
If Senior Stonewood wasn’t enough to make my nervous ticks come out, knowing that the bane of my existence was just feet from me did the trick.
“Pleasure as always, Aubrey.” Mr. Stonewood patted my back and stepped away quickly. He nudged Jett forward and latched back onto his wife.
Jett’s formalities overpowered any friendship we’d built over the years. He knew who watched and who didn’t. He smiled friendly enough as he hugged me. “Account meeting soon? And …” He leaned closer still. His next words started the tremor in me. “Don’t crumble. They’re watching.”
I swallowed hard and avoided looking in Jax’s direction, afraid I wouldn’t be able to breathe. I didn’t say a word, just tightened my grip on Jett.
He squeezed my waist before he pulled back. “You ready?” He searched my eyes while holding a friendly smile. I tried to mimic his grin, attempting to squelch the shaking I could feel creeping out. He gave me a quick nod as if to reassure me that I could face Jax.
I wanted to scream at him to wait. I wasn’t ready and never would be. Mostly because if I talked with him, I’d want to yell while I threw whatever was nearby directly at his head. I wanted to claw at him the way he clawed at my heart and ripped it apart.
None of that was for the public.
Instead, I would have to appear calm and collected while I felt the presence of his molten heat burn over my skin as he sauntered toward me.
Formal and polite had been ingrained into me in the most brutal way growing up. My father’s insistence that I remain a quiet, well-mannered girl cloaked me like a blanket would on a cold night. The feeling that I was a coward, unable to express myself, made that blanket scratchy and uncomfortable. But it also allowed me to blend in, never cause a stir, and rarely get noticed. It allowed me to survive. So, I snuggled in and resorted back to the formalities like the coward I was.
Avoiding eye contact and looking on at his family, I breathed deeply before I said to him, “Good to see you’re all doing well. I’m sure Jay will be happy to see you could make it.”
From afar, Jax’s presence weakened me. Up close, it just about destroyed me. I tried to ignore the pull to look at him and crossed my arms over my chest. Like a plague, I’d known this greeting was coming and that it had the ability to annihilate me. I’d prepared to just barely make it through, to survive. Instead of getting a quick, polite response from Jax that basically would have amounted to him brushing off the whole greeting like I’d hoped, he stayed silent.
I waited longer.
I watched the Stonewoods talking to my friends, seemingly engaged enough to not be concerned with my turmoil. Or maybe they were pretending to be engaged and hoping I could make it through this.
Probably the latter.
The silence, or maybe just his presence, willed me. No, it taunted me, forced me to look at him. My eyes shifted, slow as molasses dripping from a spoon, toward him. I felt my eyes widen without my permission, betraying me.
He towered over me, even in my heels, and had a smirk on his face that made me weak all over. The wind blew through his dark hair, tousling it just a bit. A dimple stood out while sunglasses hid the blue eyes I remembered so well.
I glanced at Rome and Vick, who were both suddenly by my side, as if sensing my panic, or as if they’d been watching the whole time.
Vick popped forward. “I’m Vick,” she practically yelled and stuck her hand out for Jax to shake.
“Always good to meet a friend of yours, Whitfield.” He shook her hand but addressed me. Both my knees, and it looked like Vick’s too, practically buckled at the sound of his voice. It rumbled out soft and smooth, like a rolling hill meeting the horizon. This voice that made women literally throw their panties on a damn stage.
Jax continued, “I’m sure you’ve heard a little about me …”
“Yup. I know who you are.” Vick’s back straightened and she snapped her hand back as if trying to steel herself. “I’ve heard all about you.”
Jax’s eyebrows raised for just a second before he smiled. “I hope all good things.”
“Not a single good thing, actually.” Vick crossed her arms. I smiled at how quickly she’d recovered and dropped her formalities for me.
Rome cleared his throat and introduced himself. “I’m Roman.”
Jax slid off his glasses to stare at Rome by my side. I thought I saw jealousy behind those piercing blue eyes that matched the color of the Caribbean Sea. They pulled me in, mesmerizing me like waves on the beach. I blinked to look away, knowing that when anyone basked in the blue sea, reveling in the beauty, those eyes turned ice cold, drowning those locked on them.
When I heard Vick gasp at seeing Jax without glasses, I glared at her. As I turned back, I realized I’d imagined Jax’s jealousy. His eyes were calm, light blue, and beautiful.
“Another of Aubrey’s friends?”
Rome let loose one of his devilish smiles and I saw the mischief in his eyes like he’d been ready to unleash it all day. “Something like that.”
Jax’s gaze shifted over to me, and I definitely didn’t miss the warning there that time.
I lifted my chin a little, ready for a snide remark.
He ran a hand through his hair, as if knowing now wasn’t the place. “You all going to Jay’s premiere in a couple days?”
Rome’s arm snaked around my shoulder and he pulled me into him. My support and my comfort. I sank into him, knowing he was my anchor, the one who would keep me grounded through this. “Whatever Brey wants, I give her.” I don’t think the innuendo was lost on any of us as he paused. “She wants Jay happy for the night,” he shrugged his shoulders like it was no skin off his nose. “They’ve been talking about this premiere night for a year. They’ll kill us if we don’t show. Right, babe?”
Jax’s eyes were glued to Rome’s arm until Rome called me babe. He looked at me. The relaxing Caribbean Sea turned into the Arctic Ocean. Cold, relentless, hard.
He started backing away toward his family. “And dinner tonight?”
We all nodded.
“We’ll talk more then,” he remarked flippantly. Then he was back to zeroing in on me. “Peaches, you and I have a lot to catch up on.” He slid his sunglasses back on and turned to join his family.
Throughout the graduation ceremony, everyone watched the Stonewoods who sat near us. We watched Jay accepting his diploma.
The only eyes that seemed to roam were Jax’s and mine. Every now and then, mine would ignore the chant in my head that was supposed to will them not to look at him. Every now and then, I would see Jax’s eyes roam over to mine, and then stare at Rome’s arm wrapped around my shoulder.
It was the first time I contemplated shrugging out of Rome’s hold.
But I didn’t.
Instead, I snuggled in closer.
