MATEO HOLDS TRUE to his word, and he even lets me sit on his lap while he types out an encrypted email, informing his contacts in the United States that I’m alive and well and to put out the word to my family.
After that’s done, he takes me on the surface of his desk. He fucks me slow with emotion hidden behind every thrust. I think he’s scared of losing me. And honestly, I’m scared of losing him too. I know deep down we shouldn’t be doing any of this for a billion different reasons, but I can’t seem to slow down or stop. And maybe I don’t want to.
Mateo gets a phone call shortly after our lovemaking, and I retreat to our room to take a hot shower. The water feels so good cascading over my sore muscles. It feels like I just did an hourlong cardio session. Sex with Mateo is just like doing a workout, but better. I get to come afterwards. And I don’t remember that happening in my old spin class.
Stepping out of the shower, I go to the sink and comb out my long hair and brush my teeth. I stare down at my flat stomach, studying it in the bathroom mirror with a frown on my face. The thought of getting pregnant with my captor’s child should scare me. The part of my brain with rational thought is definitely terrified, but then there’s a curious part that wonders…what if. What if I get pregnant with Mateo’s baby? Would he be a good father? Would he take care of us?
I think the answer to those last two questions would be yes. I think he would be an amazing and extremely protective father. But the thought of having a baby down here in Mexico away from my family and in captivity scares the living hell out of me. The realistic part of my brain overrides all curiosity. And that is why when I emerge from the bathroom and see Mateo, I tell him, “I need to take Plan B. Do they have that down here?”
“No,” he simply answers as he goes to the walk-in closet, ignoring me.
I follow him. “No as in they don’t or…?” I ask, my voice trailing off.
“No as in you are not taking it,” he says as he begins stuffing clothes into a black duffle bag.
“But…but what if I get pregnant?”
He turns and looks at me. I can practically hear the gears in his mind working as he looks down at my stomach. I bet he’s imagining me pregnant with his child right now. And I can’t help but wonder what he’s thinking. Self-consciously, I wrap my arms protectively around my naked body; and as if the spell has been broken, he blinks and tears his eyes away.
“I have to go,” he says, dismissing me, as he grabs a few suits on hangers, loading his hands.
“Mateo, we need to talk about this,” I say urgently. “Do you not understand how babies are made?” I ask incredulously.
He stops and pins me with narrowed eyes. “I’m not an idiot.”
“I didn’t say you were,” I say exasperatedly, throwing my hands up in the air. “But it’s like you’re not understanding me right now. Maybe I need to get on birth control or something,” I spit out, rambling.
“We’ll discuss this after I get home.”
“Where are you going?” I ask, annoyed.
I don’t expect him to answer me, and I’m amazed when he does. “There was an explosion at one of our warehouses down south. I need to go and make sure everything is all right. Should only take a day or two at the most.”
So, he’s leaving…for a day or two? I should feel relieved, but I don’t. I feel quite the opposite. Mateo has never left me alone for that length of time before.
“Ignacio will watch over you,” he assures me, and I’m not sure if that’s supposed to make me feel better, but it doesn’t. Ignacio isn’t exactly the friendly type, and we haven’t really gotten along ever since I arrived. I think he feels like I have some kind of powerful ulterior motive when it comes to his boss and friend, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Mateo walks over to me. Placing a finger under my chin, he tips my face up to his. And then he leans down and places a searing hot kiss to my lips, leaving me breathless.
“Behave yourself while I’m gone,” he tells me before he walks out the door, closing it behind him.
I stare after him in disbelief. My fingertips sweep over my lips, reliving that kiss in my mind for a long time after he leaves.
