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Kid: Chapter 2

Blobfish

I groan, grabbing my head at the loud noise reverberating through my painful skull. It feels like metal, and the noise is like an annoying ping-pong ball bouncing back and forth inside.

“Kid, get up!”

I get hit in the head with a pillow, making me sit up straight, eyes unable to open in the brightness of this room. Why the fuck did they put me up in the room with all the sun? Don’t they know me at all? I need darkness. Lots of fucking darkness.

“Leave me to die in my own waste, please.” My cracked, gravely tone sounds like I was on a bender. Accurate.

“Bro, you’ve been here two nights already, haven’t seen you in the light. Get the fuck up and wash your nasty greasy-ass mop. We have a guest coming over,” Hawke says, opening the windows of their disgustingly gorgeous beach home.

Yep. I’m at Hawke and Cole’s beach house. My good friends and newfound lovers told me to come fly out for the summer, specifically to work with my over-protective brother-from-another-mother, Hawke, now that they are all comfortably moved in.

A fresh start for me in their new fresh start. His reasons for bringing me here are probably different from the reasons I came. I want a new sea of fish to fuck. He wants me to get an actual job that doesn’t involve slinging dope. We’ll meet somewhere in the middle, I’m sure.

The place is insane. It’s got nothing but views of the ocean in every floor length window that faces it. The beach is down below, ready for me to fuck it up with some wild, sandy sex. I’ve already envisioned it. Just like the ocean sex. Salt and sand in places unimaginable. I can’t wait for the chafe.

“You know me. I thrive in the night. Call me Goliath. Stone by day, warrior by night.” I recite the opening to my favorite cartoon in a dark voice.

“Ten minutes. She’ll be here in ten minutes.”

“We were betrayed by the humans we were sworn to protect…” I continue the introduction to Gargoyles in my drunken state before sitting up abruptly. “Wait, did you say she?”

I snap out of my nostalgic moment when I hear the mention of a chick.

“Cole’s sister, you idiot. She’ll be here soon, so get yourself together. You smell like a wet dog.”

I lift my arm, smelling my armpit before making a funny face at him.

“I like the smell of mutt. It’s endearing. Bitches love it.”

He scowls at me, looking down at me in disgust.

“I mean bitches, like literally bitches.” I sigh as he continues to glare at me. “Female dogs? Because I’m a…dog? Do you, you get it? Fuck, it’s too early for this.” I run a hand down my burning face.

He rolls his eyes and walks back out into the massive living space separating my room from the other half of the house.

After showering, snorting a line off the bathroom counter, and throwing on my black ripped jeans paired with a ripped-up, holey t-shirt from an Ohio band concert, I scruff my white blonde hair in the mirror. My eyes are still bloodshot from the night before, but the eyebrow ring distracts from it. I think. Fuck, who am I kidding? This is me. Strung out and living off stimulants. Take it or leave it.

“Big Bird! Come to mama!” Cole screams out, running towards me in the living room once I make my appearance, grabbing me into a big hug.

Big Bird. She still hasn’t dropped it. I got high as fuck hanging with them back home before they left and, for some strange reason, started announcing every letter of the last word of the conversations. “D” is for disaster, “C” is for cunt. I began teaching an alphabet lesson, and apparently the nickname stuck.

Truth be told, I feel kind of bad right now. I’ve been here for two days and haven’t even seen her yet. I’m so shady for that shit. I need to get my act together.

I lift her up and she wraps her legs around my waist as I twirl her while she squeals. I set her down as she scruffs my blonde, unruly hair playfully.

“I see you’ve changed your mind and realized this connection we have,” I say in a serious tone, knowing Hawke’s watching.

I live for pissing him off. It’s so easy. Just hit on his Cole and he’ll send flames at you through his eyes.

“Hmm…not quite,” she says with furrowed brows. Her expression changes and I can feel the excitement radiating off her. “Let me show you around!”

She drags me all around the place, showing me everything with such excitement. The house is literally outstanding. I’m really fucking happy for them. I am.

After everything Hawke’s gone through, they deserve every bit of the happiness they seem to share. I never thought I’d see Hawke wifed up, but Cole changed him. She saved him. Literally put her life on the line for him. Loyalty, a beautiful thing. It almost makes me want to see if I can find a connection like that. Almost.

“My sis is gonna be here soon to have lunch with us before the party tonight,” she says, smiling, checking her watch as we sit down at the outdoor patio on the ground floor of their place.

Her cheerful face immediately drops into a scowl as she glares at me, scaring me with a sharp look in her once kind eyes.

“What?” I ask, with wide eyes.

“Don’t you even think about touching her,” she scolds abruptly. “She won’t like you, so don’t even try.”

“What?! This is ridiculous!” I scoff. “You have a sister. I’m definitely going to fuck her, just off principal.”

Hawke pinches the bridge of his nose, shaking his head while blowing air to the ground.

“I’m sorry, but it’s true. If I’m not allowed to fuck you, I’m definitely fucking your blood sister. Like, duh.”

Cole stands immediately, walking towards me with a finger pointed aggressively. “I’m telling you for your own good. Don’t go down that dark hole.”

“I’ma be all in that hole.” I wiggle my head back and forth, taunting her as I talk. “Sliding through again and again. I’m about to set up camp in that hole and live there all summer like a hippie mountain man.”

“Nic-Nac!” a voice yells, disrupting our conversation.

Both of our eyes stay focused on each other. Hers widening in shock, mine widening in excitement as a grin grows.

Cole’s scowl changes into a big smile that’s more like the Cole I know. We all turn our heads up to face the voice that’s coming from the patio above us.

My heart nearly stops in my chest. It might have, if not for the coke, keeping me alive.

She’s leaning over the railing, her black hair falling around her face, her green eyes focused on us, her mischievous grin already in place.

It’s her.

It’s fucking Han.

She bounces her quirky ass down to us on the patio, giving Cole a huge, squealing hug before turning to face me. I stand from my seat, awkwardly trying to put my hands in my pockets but failing miserably because, fucking skinny jeans.

She’s wearing this black crop top shirt with the phases of the moon, paired with these shiny latex shorts that are tied up with string. Her huge clunky black boots don’t seem very beach friendly. This is not a brunch-type outfit, but her not caring at all makes me like it all the more. Her tattoos are all exposed now, and I see the snake wrapped around her thigh that slips up her side, coming out of the top of her shorts near her hip.

Good fucking God. How is this Cole’s sister?!

I see it now that they’re standing next to each other. That button nose. I should’ve known.

She smiles at me and I can’t tell if she’s doing it on purpose or not. Does she remember me?

“Jo, this is Kid, Hawke’s good friend. He’s staying with us for the summer.”

She tucks her stick-straight black hair behind her ear, tilting her chin up to me as I wait to see where we go from here.

Jo?

“Wait. Oh, yeah!” Her eyebrows knit together as her mouth drops open in surprise. “You’re the guy I was making out with last night,” she says bluntly, smiling while nodding her head.

I bite my bottom lip, making a pained face at Cole. Hawke falls back into the patio chair, his head facing the clouds as his hands drop to the ground beside him as if someone just shot him dead with an arrow from the sky.

“No, you didn’t,” Cole says disappointingly, her face a sad little frown.

“Yep,” I say, more to Han than her. “And I’m the guy you’re going to be fucking tonight.”

“Dude,” Hawke groans from his seat, shaking his head at the clouds.

Han laughs, turning to face Cole, pointing at me with an upturned hand. “Is he always like this?”

Yep. I love amusing her. Favorite new hobby. Fuck competitive duck herding. I’m making Han laugh.

“Unfortunately, yes,” Cole admits.

“I thought your name was Han? That’s what your boyfriend called you,” I say to her.

“Boyfriend? She doesn’t have a boyfriend,” Cole interrupts, looking sideways at her. “Why did you tell him you had a boyfriend?”

“I just wanted to fuck with him,” she says to Cole like I’m not even there before turning back to face me. “I’m Johanna. Jo by family, Han by the people I fuck.”

My mouth drops open as I gaze between her and Cole.

She’s as blunt as they come.

I think I’m drooling.

“I knew this was going to be bad.” Cole sighs, running a hand through her hair as she joins Hawke on the seat.

After the fun little introduction, I sit back on one of the lounge chairs facing the beach, letting the warm air hit my face as I try to sober up.

Han eventually plops herself directly in the same seat as me, even though there are like seven of them available, while Cole and Hawke head inside to get some food and drinks from the kitchen. No bubble.

“So, Kid,” she begins, leaning in closer to me, tucking her chin against her bony little shoulder with a knowing smirk. I’m waiting for it, waiting for her to hit on me so we can hurry and do this already. “What’s your favorite sea animal?”

I’ve never heard a question asked in such a sexy tone. God, she’s so random and constantly throwing me off guard.

“Blobfish,” I answer after a moment to think.

“Random,” she responds, drawing her brows together.

“Honest.”

“Why?” she asks.

“They have no bones. The dark environment in which they survive literally supports them. Plus, they got a bad rep. They aren’t ugly until you remove them from their comfort zone.”

“So you can relate?” she questions, rolling to her stomach, our thighs touching, crossing her legs up behind her.

She’s attempting to get to know me by acting like she’s not getting to know me.

“My dark environment is the only sustainable living situation for me. So yeah, I guess so.” I shrug, then stop myself. “But, I do have bones. One big one in particular.” I give her the sex eyes.

“A femur?” she asks with excitement. “No way, I got one too!”

She’s playing with me. I narrow my eyes at her, grinning, while trying to figure her out.

Before I can come back with something, she’s standing up at the edge of the chair, facing me. I sit there, watching her next move like she owns the world and I’m just the blobfish living in it. She instantly has all of my attention. Grabbing the hem of her crop top, she pulls it up and over her chest and down her tatted up arms, revealing a green, string bikini.

Yep, that bone is coming into play.

Her playful green eyes stay on mine as she unties her shorts, pulling them down her legs before removing her shoes. She stands there in nothing but the suit before me and my eyes are darting all over to every part of her I can see. I cough, choking on phlegm as I get the full view of her nipple ring pressed against this tiny suit. The snake on her thigh begging me to pet it just like the nipple ring is begging me to suck it.

“I’m going surfing,” she says nonchalantly, as if this is normal while she walks backwards towards the beach, her black chin length hair blowing into her face. “Come on!”

I look back at the house in search of Cole and Hawke.

“They’re fucking again. C’mon! Let’s go!” she demands, grabbing a board that’s stuck in the sand and carrying it out into the water.

Who the fuck is this chick? She’s blunt, sexy, likes to party, likes to fuck, keeps me on my toes, never know what she’s going to say, eyes that melt, and a body that’s too hot for her own good, oh, and now she surfs? Yeah, okay.

I slap myself across the face quickly just to make sure I can feel it. Reality for me tends to bend from time to time. I walk towards the water, the warm sand beneath my bare feet. I find a spot and plop down, leaning back on my hands to see her in action. She’s insane. I’m watching her as she does a duck dive with her board under a wave, wetting her hair as she turns back to me with a smile.

She perches herself in the takeoff zone, waiting for her wave. Finding it, she drops in and quickly pops up on her board. She rides like she owns the water and it owes her a favor. Riding the wave out, her thighs move the board beneath her like a professional. Saluting me at the end of her ride with her two fingers, she hops off and disappears into the water.

Her board washes up towards the beach and it’s then that I realize she didn’t even have it tethered to her. I stand up, squinting my eyes as I search the water. I get nervous when I don’t see her. It’s been a full minute at least. I take my shirt off and start running towards her. I walk through the waves, swimming out towards where she disappeared beneath the surface.

“Fuck!” I yell nervously, pushing my lengthy body through the water. “Han!”

Just as I get far enough out to where the water hits the middle of my chest, she pops up out of the water, the smile already in place.

“Jesus, fuck…” I groan, gripping my chest.

I can’t take the stress. My lungs are burning.

“I saw a blobfish,” she calls out, swimming over to me. “Tried to bring it up, but remembered it’d be uglier up here.”

I shake my head, running my hands through my hair as I attempt to regulate my breathing.

“You’re insane.” I groan.

Her eyes narrow as her smile drops.

“What is sanity?” she questions, challenging me, and I feel the depth of her in three words.

She swims up beside me, our bodies being lifted and dropped softly by the waves of the salty water surrounding us. She faces me as our knees gently rub together beneath the surface. The reflection of the ocean makes those eyes even more bright. They’re striking, making me feel small in her vision.

“Did you come to save me?” she questions, cocking her head to the side, keeping herself afloat with her hands.

It’s clear by the fact I still have my jeans on that this wasn’t a casual swim.

“Yeah. Yeah, I did,” I breathe, still trying to calm my nerves. “I got scared.”

Her thigh rubs against mine beneath the surface, sending a bolt of electricity through me. We’re moving in closer and closer. She places her hands on my shoulders, wrapping her thighs around my hips, holding on. I grab her waist, holding her in place, loving the feel of her warm skin against my hands beneath the cool water.

It’s strange that it feels so natural to just be touching her like this when I don’t know her at all. Placing her nose against mine, I wonder for a moment if she’s going to kiss me. But she doesn’t. She just stares at me with our noses touching, looking like she has so much to say, yet no reason to tell me.

“You can’t save a person who doesn’t want to be saved,” she whispers through her smile.

A wave comes crashing into us as we separate. She swims back towards the shore, so I follow her like a curious scientist, discovering a new rare specimen from the sea. I’ve never been the type to follow the lead. I’m the leader, I’m the smooth-talker. Yet here I float, waiting on her next move.

Nothing about her is normal, and it’s got me hooked like a fish out of water.

A blobfish, to be exact, set to die a slow, torturous, and ugly death.


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