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Lust: Chapter 34

Mariana

Brandon is headed my way with an urgency that sends my heart pounding. His eyes are wild, his brow furrowed.

What is this about?

“Mariana.” His voice is choked. “Can I… Can I speak with you for a moment?”

Warmth radiates within me. There’s no mistaking the look of longing in his eyes. I nod and stand up from my chair in a daze, the whole world around me growing fuzzy and bright. He leads me away from the crowd, down to the beach. The sand beneath our feet muffles our steps.

Finally, when we’ve reached a spot away from the noise of the party, he stops. He turns to me, swallowing hard. “I’ve been a fool.” His voice shakes.

I wait for him to say more, but he seems too full of emotion to speak. I stand with him in delicious silence. The setting sun bathes his face in blinding golden light, his thick lashes casting shadows down his cheek. He’s so damn beautiful.

I’ll remember this moment forever. It will be burned in my memory, like the light of a distant star.

“I didn’t listen to you. It was… I hate myself for not seeing…” He shuts his eyes, shaking his head. “Sorry. I’m just overwhelmed.”

Lightness lifts at my limbs, making me feel like I could float away. This is the man who delivers sermons with the fluidity of a watercolor brush on a canvas. Now, he’s struggling to form basic sentences.

When he opens his eyes, they’re dark and intense. “I love you so much it scares me. I was so afraid that I…” He swallows. “I was so afraid that you’d resent me for stealing your youth…”

When his voice shakes, I set my hand on his arm. “It wouldn’t be stealing when I’m giving it to you freely. I love you, Brandon. I want you to have my youth and my old age. I want you to have all of it.”

His eyes grow misty, sparkling under the setting sun. “I understand what the Bible says about marriage. About two people becoming one flesh. This past week and a half…” He sniffles and wipes under his eyes. “It was like I lost a limb.” He shakes his head. “Even more than that. It was like I was disembodied, walking the earth like a revenant. It’s only now that I’m with you that I… That I feel human again.”

My heart squeezes inside my chest. “Brandon…”

“Mariana.” His voice cracks, and tears trail down his cheeks. “Please forgive me. Be with me. Be with me forever.”

His words hit me like a wave, making me momentarily dizzy. I sway toward him, and he takes me into his arms. His lips find mine, and he kisses me gently. Sweetly. He reaches up to cup my face, his fingers threading through my hair as his mouth moves against mine.

“I could have given it all up for you, my sweet Mariana. I could have given up everything. Even the church.”

I melt into him, wrapping my arms around his neck. “You’d never have to. You can have everything.”

He lets out a low groan. “And I want it all, Mari. I’m a greedy man. It’s my greatest sin. And I’ve never been as greedy for anything as I am for you.”

I kiss his neck. “I’ve wanted you to be greedy for me since the first time you touched me.”

He kisses me hard, and heat ignites between us, a blaze of longing engulfing my senses. Every touch, every sigh is a silent pledge.

As we break apart, both of our chests are rising and falling rapidly.

“You’re mine after this,” he says. “You’re coming home with me and never leaving.” His eyes grow hesitant. “Is that okay?”

A hysterical giggle bubbles from my chest. “There’s nothing I want more than to go home with you. And stay.”

We stand without speaking, the sound of the waves crashing in the distance. Brandon’s fingers trail down my arm. “Forever?”

I nod, warm trickles running down my face. “Forever.”


Brandon is so giddy he seems drunk, but I know he didn’t have a drop of alcohol after he confessed his love. He just stared at me with a tender expression that made my heart squeeze in my chest until the reception ended. After Livvy and Cole made their grand exit in a helicopter, he nearly dragged me to his car, determined to take me home.

Home.

That’s what this house feels like now.

“I want you living in this house.” He kisses the tip of my nose. “I want to put babies in you.” He yanks the hem of my dress up, exposing my lower half. “Right here.”

His warm palm touches my belly, and I giggle. “Is that where babies go?”

He smiles ruefully, though his eyes are still wild and dazed. “I think so.” He lowers his palm to my naval. “Here?”

I lift his hand from my skin and bring it to my mouth, kissing his palm. “I think you’re getting a little ahead of yourself, Pastor.”

His smile fades. “Do you want kids? Someday, I mean.”

Something wicked rises within me. “Would it change your mind about me if I said no?”

He scowls. “Of course it wouldn’t. How dare you even ask me that?”

I shriek when he lifts me into the air and cradles me to his chest. “I want you, Mariana Isabel Hernandez. I do want kids, but I don’t need them if I have you.”

My head is fuzzy as he carries me into his bedroom. My God, I feel like I could die of happiness.

I never thought we’d be here.

“I do want kids,” I say dreamily as he sets me onto the bed.

Brandon’s eyes alight. “Really?”

I smile at the joy in his expression. “I’ve always wanted a family, even more so now.” I reach up and place my hands on his shoulders. “Now that I’ve found you.”

He leans down and kisses me, his hands roaming over my body. “Fuck, Mari, I can’t believe I was so stupid. How could I have ever lived without this?”

A moan escapes my lips as his hands find their way under my shirt, his fingers exploring every inch of my skin.

I arch my back, pressing my body closer to his as his lips trail down my neck, leaving a trail of hot kisses in their wake.

He wastes no time, yanking down his pants and pressing himself inside me. “Fuck!” he nearly shouts after burying himself to the hilt. “I’ve missed this.”

I moan. “Me too.”

“I’m not letting you leave this bed for days. I hope you’re ready for it.”

I hum in response, lost in the pleasure of his hard body covering mine and his big cock stretching my insides.

The next few minutes are fevered and frantic. The room is filled with the sounds of our gasps and moans. Brandon is relentless, but I match him thrust for thrust.

My fingers dig into his skin as I feel my release building, the pressure in my core becoming almost too much to bear. But Brandon doesn’t let up, his movements becoming faster and more frenzied as he drives me closer and closer to the edge.

“That’s it, my girl,” he says, his wild eyes fixed on my face. “Let go. Show me you’re mine. Cry out for me.”

His words send me over the edge, and I release a shriek, my body convulsing as I ride out the waves of ecstasy. Brandon follows soon after, his own release filling me with a warmth that spreads through my body.

We lie there for a while, our bodies still entwined, our breaths slowly returning to normal. I look up at him, his face soft and gentle, and I know that I’ve never been happier than I am right now.

Just a few weeks ago, he gave me a similar dreamy look, except that one was edged with guilt.

Letting go of it all is heaven. Here I am, lying in bed with the man I love, and he never wants me to leave.

His smile is sleepy as he strokes my cheek. “I want to make you my wife soon. Does that scare you?”

Warmth washes over my whole body like a gentle tropical wave. Did I fantasize about this moment?

No, my fantasies were much more modest than this. I would have been overjoyed if he’d simply held my hand in front of my family.

“No,” I say, and his smile grows. He brushes his mouth lightly against my shoulder.

“I don’t want to suffocate you, because I know you have so much life to explore, but I’m impatient to make you mine.”

Mine. The word pulls a soft groan from my chest.

“I want to explore with you,” he says. “I don’t want you to miss out on anything. If you want to travel the world, we’ll do it together.” He smiles softly. “We’ll start by hiking Machu Picchu. If you want to get your PhD after you finish your masters, I’ll follow you wherever you need to go to get it. I don’t want to cage you, my darling Mariana. I want to fly with you.”

His words hit me like a meteor. My God, have I ever been loved like this before?

“I love you, Brandon.” My voice quivers.

He grabs my face and kisses my mouth hard. “I love you too, my beautiful, fierce, perfect Mariana.”


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