Our flight left early the next morning and I made sure I was back in my room before everyone else was up. Wes didn’t even stir when I snuck in and got into my bed. I laid there, still thinking about her as Wes’s alarm went off. Those damn bruises on her face—I fucking hated them. I wanted to wash them all away.
I wanted to take her pain and give it all to him, but I couldn’t. She was right. It was over and I had to let it go… for now, until I saw him on the ice again.
We all boarded onto the jet and flew back to the city with the weight of our loss hanging heavily over our heads. Our coach wasn’t particularly thrilled about it and he wanted us on the ice as soon as we touched down in Orchid Beach.
I didn’t even get to say anything to Harper because she disappeared as soon as we got off the jet. Wes and I both walked to our cars in silence before heading back to the training facility. It was a brutal practice, one that we had to do without pucks. Those were always the worst and as if we didn’t work our asses off last night… we were all fucking exhausted after practice.
As I sat in the locker room after getting a shower, I pulled out my phone and sent Harper a message. I was able to clear my mind while out on the ice because of the intensity of the drills we were forced to do, but as soon as I was back in the locker room, I couldn’t help myself as my thoughts drifting back to her.
NICO
Did you get home all right? I didn’t even see you leave.
She responded almost instantly, sending me a selfie of her lying on her couch. My eyebrows pinched together in disapproval as I saw the bruises that were deepening in color under her eyes. The tip of her nose was scraped from the camera and my jaw clenched.
HARPER
I did. I was exhausted after traveling and haven’t left my couch since.
NICO
Good. You need to rest. Call me later?
Wes walked over to me and stopped in front of me. His hair was damp from his shower and he was wearing a sweat suit. “You want to hang out?”
My phone vibrated in my hand and I looked up at my friend. “Come over if you want. I planned on just lying around.”
“You’re not going to go see her?”
I shook my head, as I quickly read her message. “I’m pretty sure she just wants to lay low and I don’t want to overstep at all.”
HARPER
I’m going to take a nap, but I’ll call you later this evening.
Wes nodded with a look of approval. “Probably a good idea. You don’t want to scare her away with your obsessiveness.”
I cut my eyes at him. “I am not obsessive.”
Wes snorted. “Dude… you know what—I’m not even going to argue with you. If you can’t see your obsession with her, then you have some serious issues.”
I laughed as I shook my head at him as everyone began to clear out of the locker room. “You know I would never admit something like that.”
“Smart of you not to,” he agreed with a smirk. “Although, I’m not stupid. I see shit.”
“I’m sure you do,” I told him as I grabbed my stuff. “Meet me over at my place. We can play Call of Duty or something.”
“Deal.”
Wes and I were both sitting on my couch, each of us drinking a beer while we waited for our pizza to be delivered. We were playing video games, just talking about mindless shit. We went over the shit show of our game until it started to shift into a territory that I wasn’t sure I wanted to talk to him about.
“So, things are getting pretty serious between the two of you?”
I lifted my beer to my mouth and took a swig as we waited to join another match on Call of Duty. “Yeah, and I don’t know what to do about it.”
Wes glanced over at me as he leaned forward to be closer to the TV. “What do you mean? I mean, I know shit between the two of you is different since there’s a lot at stake with her job and everything.”
“I tried to get her to quit. I told her to just move in with me and let me take care of her.”
A string of laughter escaped Wes as he threw his head backward. He leaned against the back of the couch just as the game started and he instantly got shot. “Fuck,” he grumbled as he sat upright again. His focus was on the game, but he wasn’t going to let the conversation go. “Bro. You’re such a liar saying that you aren’t obsessed with her. I’m assuming she declined your proposition?”
“Oh, of course,” I told him with a laugh. “I didn’t think she would actually agree. She’s too independent to do something like that, but I figured it was worth a shot. She’s been working on shooting weddings and other things to try and get away from sports. Her dream is to have her own business doing that kind of stuff instead.”
Wes was silent for a moment. “You want my honest opinion?”
I stared at the TV as I ducked around some objects in the game. “No, but I’m thinking you’re going to give it to me anyways.”
“I think you need to tell her how you really feel. You know how short life is and I don’t know what the hell you’re waiting for anymore.”
Our round ended and I looked over at him just as the bell rang. “I did tell her how I feel.” I rose to my feet and grabbed my wallet before disappearing from my apartment to go get our pizza from the lobby. As I reached my floor again and brought the box back into the living room, Wes took a sip of his beer and stared at me.
“Did you tell her that you’re in love with her?”
I froze in place just as I flipped open the pizza box. “What? No. Why the fuck would I do that?”
“Because that’s how you really feel,” he said matter-of-factly while he grabbed a piece of pizza. “You’re only lying to yourself if you think you’re not in love with her.”
The heaviness of his words settled in my bones and I sat there for a moment as I stared at the TV. My eyes weren’t focused on what was happening on the screen as my mind ran wild with possibilities. I swallowed hard over the lump that had lodged itself in my throat. Were my feelings for her that obvious?
“Don’t worry,” Wes cut through my thoughts as he chewed a mouthful of pizza. “I won’t tell anyone your secret. I’m like a vault.”
I let out an exasperated sigh as I finally grabbed a slice for myself. “Am I that obvious?”
Wes shrugged. “Nah, not really. I just know you well enough that I can tell.”
“I can’t tell her.”
His brow furrowed. “Why not?”
“Because I don’t want to complicate things any more than I already have. It will only make things messier.”
Wes took another sip of his beer. “I don’t know, bro. Things are always complicated. There’s nothing you can do to change it, but I think it’s worth telling her.” He set his beer down on the coffee table. “You might be surprised when you find out she feels the same way.”
“How could you possibly know that?” I questioned him as I sank back into the couch.
“If you can’t tell then you really are in fucking denial,” Wes told me as he rolled his eyes. “She looks at you like you’re the only thing that matters, Nico. I think you’ll be surprised when you finally tell her how you feel.”
I mulled over his words as I sipped on my beer. Wes directed his attention away from me as he typed something out on his phone. My mind drifted to my mother and how quickly she slipped away from us. Life was unpredictable. Things could change in the blink of an eye. Wes was right. I needed to come clean with Harper and tell her how I actually felt about her, but it terrified me.
There was something about being that vulnerable with someone that was frightening. She already had the power to destroy me, she just didn’t know it yet.
From the moment I met Harper Jensen, I knew I needed to make her mine. Even after that night at the club, something about her had struck something deep inside me. I couldn’t get her out of my head, and then it was as if the universe heard my thoughts and brought her back into my life.
I wasn’t looking for a relationship when I met her. What happened between us was just supposed to be something fun. She was a good luck charm that I knew I couldn’t lose; she was just looking for an escape. Our arrangement was supposed to serve two simple purposes. But things between us shifted into something more.
Harper was under my skin, she was in my heart and in my soul. I wanted her to be a permanent fixture in my life. I wanted to savor the moments between us and never let them go.
“I hate to be the one who eats and runs, but I’m going to head out.”
I looked back at Wes who was already standing up from the couch. “Since when do you have plans that I don’t know about?”
He glanced at me with a look of guilt in his eyes, almost as if he got caught doing something. “Who said I have any plans?”
I scowled at him. “You’re abruptly leaving to go home and hang out by yourself?”
A chuckle escaped him. “Touché.” He paused for a second as mischief danced in his irises. “I’m just going to go help a friend out with some research stuff.”
“You have other friends?”
Wes gave me the middle finger. “You’re a dick.”
I stared at him as I raised a suspicious eyebrow. “How do you know all my secrets, but I don’t know yours?”
Wes gave me a crooked grin. “Because I’m the vault, not you.”
“Please tell me it’s not Harper’s friend, Ava.”
“What?” His brow furrowed. “Absolutely not. I promise it’s no one you know. It’s just this girl I met and I promised I’d help her with some research for the books she’s writing—”
I held my hands up to stop him. “Forget I asked,” I laughed as I shook my head. “I don’t even want to know about the shit you’ve gotten yourself into.”
Wes laughed along with me as he headed toward the elevator door. “I’m not quite sure what I’ve even gotten myself into, but I’m along for the ride now. Wish me luck!”
“Good luck?” I spoke the words half in question, half in declaration as I heard the elevator doors open. He stepped inside and they quickly closed behind him before he began his descent down to the lobby.
Wes was definitely more of a free spirit than anyone else, so I wasn’t really surprised by his new adventure. It sounded pretty on-brand for him. It made sense why he was reading romance books on the plane now. I wondered if he was reading her books. I didn’t need to wonder about what kind of research he’d be helping her with.
As I began to clean up the pizza and the empty beer bottles, my mind drifted back to Harper. I needed to be honest with her. I had given her the watered-down version of my feelings, and she deserved to know the truth. Being so open and vulnerable with someone wasn’t the only thing that scared me about it. I was afraid I would scare her away too, and that was the last thing I wanted to do.
She deserved to know and I knew I had to tell her. It wasn’t something I could just do over the phone. I needed to tell her in person and just prepare myself for the possibility of sending her running in the opposite direction.
All I could do was hope for the best.
And hope she felt the same way I did.
