“CAN’T WE JUST stay here?” She asked the words I’d been thinking since I’d woken up with her in my arms.
The sun was just starting to rise outside the floor-to-ceiling window of our hotel room. It was our last day in Vegas. We would be hitting the road the next morning, only about four hours away from our final destination and real life.
“What do you want to do?”
“Stay here with you,” she immediately answered, and I peeked down to see her. God, she was fucking beautiful.
“Done. Order room service.” Her eyes went wide and she shook her head, the gratitude clear in her eyes.
“That’s sweet, but we can’t. We shouldn’t.” She sighed.
“Why not?”
“It’s expensive,” she huffed, and I kissed her. “Plus, Leti is in town.”
“Nina’s sister,” I clarified, and she nodded, tracing the bridge of my nose.
“They want to go shopping.”
“She brought a friend, right?” I asked, trying to find a way to suggest she let them go on their own so she could stay with me.
“Yeah.” She stilled but then relaxed, and I wondered what that was about.
“Anyhow, I should probably book a massage…” She kept talking, but an idea sparked. If we couldn’t have the whole day to ourselves hidden away in our little bubble, I would at least take two hours to show her how much I loved her.
Loved her? No. I couldn’t. I didn’t know what that was.
Cared for her, of course.
Appreciated her, sure, but loved?
Fuck.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, quickly picking up on my silence, and I shook my head trying to ignore the squeeze of something in the pit of my stomach.
“Nothing.” I tried to smile at her. “How about I rub you down?” I offered, never taking my eyes from her.
“Hmm, I don’t know.” She was so fucking cute. “Your sexy hands all over me might end up with us locked in and ordering room service.”
“I’m serious. I’ll behave.”
“What if I don’t want you to?”
“Captain,” I warned as I rolled out of bed, headed to my bag, and searched for what would help me talk her into my plan. “Here it is,” I said, showing her the bottle behind me.
“Lotion?” she asked as I grabbed and put on a pair of basketball shorts. “Wait, why are you getting dressed?” she pouted as she sat up, her breasts on display. I licked my lips.
“You’re a fucking temptation.” She blushed. “Body oil,” I clarified.
“Body oil.” The amusement was clear in her voice, and I winked at her. “Marines use body oil?” she asked, lifting the sheet to cover herself up, and I missed the sight instantly.
“I do.”
“Very metro of you.”
“Ha-ha. Lie on your stomach,” I ordered. Her hand moved up, her fingers tapping her pretty lips.
“Hmm, that’s an offer I don’t think I can refuse.”
“Then get on it, Cap.” I pointed at the bed and got the most incredible view: her smile.
She tossed a pillow toward the end of the bed, and the sheet dropped. Her breasts, perky and supple, all too quickly disappeared as she moved to the center of the bed and did as I ordered. The view of her willowy back and plump ass all on display for me. Mine, a voice in my head growled, and I swallowed hard.
“You changing your mind?” she sassed over her shoulder, and I shook my head and got to work. The entire time I worked out every knot and kink in her back, I thought about what I needed to do so I could keep her. So I could claim her as mine. Was that even possible?
Before I knew it, the minutes melted into more than an hour. My hands tired, but her satisfied, boneless body in bed made the ache worthwhile.
“That okay?” I asked, and she purred, a soft smile on her face as I sat on the edge of the bed next to her, my hand on the back of her thigh.
“You have magic hands,” she sighed. “Thank you.”
“Thank you for letting me.” I squeezed her thigh, tempted like hell to touch and rub even further.
“Mmm… maybe next time you can work in some naughty hand time?” Fuck, it was like she could read my mind.
“Why wait?” I teased, my hand moving up slightly, and she laughed. She rolled over and sat up next to me, her head resting on my shoulder. I liked how she fit with me. Like she was made to be right where she was.
“I wish we had the time.” Her smile faltered, and it made it hard for me to swallow.
Time. It was quickly running out and too soon she’d be gone. Not forever, she’d be around, but if I didn’t do something quick, I would lose her.
“Right.”
“We go home tomorrow,” she said, faking the chipper tone in her voice.
“Home,” I repeated, my eyes on her lips. The concept was a fucking foreign word to me. A week ago, I would have told you there was no such thing, willing to go where the wind blew me. But now… Now it was different. How the hell she had changed the game in less than an entire week was beyond me. Home, the one thing I never let myself hope for, was quickly becoming something easier to imagine.
“You’re going to room with Brandon?” she asked. It was weird we were only now talking about this for the first time.
“Till the wedding.” I shrugged.
“And then? I mean after the wedding?” she fished, and I had no fucking clue what to tell her. My lifestyle to this point no longer made sense, and it was all her damn fault for making me want more.
“Macie.” I didn’t know what to tell her. I wanted to tell her I had a plan. A solid one. One she could count on, so she could rely on me as a partner.
Partner?
Rely on me?
I’d never had people who needed those things from me. Only my buds in the Marines, but that was different. Suddenly, the air felt too hot and the walls felt like they were closing in on me.
“Baby,” I started to say, but she quickly cut me off, a fake smile on her face that killed the panic and made me pause.
“It’s cool.” She shrugged, then she stood and grabbed my shirt from the night before and tossed it over her head. I loved how she looked wearing my clothes. But that was not for here or now. Not when she was avoiding my eyes. It wasn’t cool, not even close.
Fuck. Why couldn’t I have my shit together? Why couldn’t I have something more than a good time to offer her?
“I should get ready.” She picked up her phone and groaned, running her fingers through her wild strawberry hair. “They texted. They wanna leave in… crap, I have, like, ten minutes to get ready.” She started to rush around the room, and I felt like I was losing her. Get a grip, Santino.
“Macie.” I stood, tossing on my shorts, but I didn’t move any further.
“I’ll probably see you tonight.”
“Tonight?”
“Lunch and shopping with Nina are one thing. But add in Leti and her friend, and it’s a whole other ball game,” she enlightened me.
“But we leave tomorrow,” I pointed out, wincing at the poutiness in my tone.
“I know, but…’
“But?” My heart fucking froze in my chest.
“Might be better this way.” The softness and vulnerability in her tone made it feel like an anchor landed in my stomach.
“Cap—“ My cell phone rang, killing my words in their wake.
“You should get that. I really need to get ready.” She grabbed clothes from her bag, and something inside me broke.
“Wait.” I rushed over and pulled her into me.
“Don’t do this,” she quickly said, her eyes cast down, hand on my chest.
“Baby, please—”
“I get it, okay? You…” She sighed and looked up at me, the light in her eyes slightly dimmed. “You don’t want anything more than now. It’s fine. You didn’t make any promises and—’
“I told you I wanted more, right?”
“And you got it,” she pointed out, her brows bunched together. “You got Vegas, and Vegas is almost done.”
“I don’t have a pot to piss in, Mace.” I groaned hating how pathetic I sounded.
“And you think I care about that?” she argued.
“Babe, I got eyes,” I clipped.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’re pure class, Straight up, no bullshit—”
“Sam—”
“And I can’t give you that. We get back, I have a place to live for three months. I gotta find a job and shit. Three months. I have savings and shit, but—“
“Did I ask you to buy me a designer purse in my sleep or something?” she cut me off and crossed her arms over her chest, no longer touching me. Attitude dripping off her.
“Babe.”
“I didn’t. I don’t need stuff, Sam.” She shook her head, and her cheek muscles twitched. “My dad… Sam, he’s loaded, but I don’t take a fucking thing from him. Not one dime.”
“I’m just saying I—’
“Oh, I get what you’re saying.” She shook me off, taking another step away from me. “I just don’t think you get what I’m saying back.”
“Macie…” I sighed.
“I don’t care about those kinds of things. I like you,” she blurted out, obviously ticked off. “I like being with you, and I’m not talking about sex, though that’s nice too.”
“Just nice?” Fuck, I was lame.
“Don’t do that,” she said seriously. “Not when I’m being real with you.”
“But Macie…” My phone started ringing again, and then hers joined in, and I ran my fingers through my hair, frustrated as hell.
“I gotta get that and get ready.” She added another two steps as she moved closer to the bathroom. “Worst case, we still have tonight. Right?” I didn’t say a thing as she disappeared into the bathroom. Not one damn word. I couldn’t.
It was do or die time. I had to shit or get off the pot.
I wasn’t the kind of man to live with regrets. I’d made it a point to live life to its fullest.
With the fucking childhood I’d had, no people of my own and the indifference of my existence to those who had to put up with me, I’d seen enough. I didn’t want to be that person who lived with regrets and what ifs. One of my foster moms had taught me that. She had quietly pined away for a man she could never have, the story between them probably more complicated than my nine-year-old self could possibly understand, but it had always made me sad for her.
The question now was, what the hell was I going to do?
Macie
“Men are pigs,” Leti toasted, and I giggled.
“Aye, aye!” Leti’s pretty friend agreed, and my buzz made me sigh.
“Not all men, but Jeffrey is a total pig.” Nina raised her glass, and I laughed, putting my hands up.
“Okay, I’m sorry, let me get this right.” I was more than a little tipsy from our martini lunch. It could have been because I’d had more martinis than actual lunch. “You’re telling me that you”—I pointed to Leti—“got home early to your apartment and found her”—I pointed to the brunette with us—“screwing the guy you were seeing?”
“Yup,” Let said with a pop.
“Pretty much,” the brunette nodded. It stumped me as I looked at both of them sitting together with us.
“And now you two, no offense, babe.” I looked at the brunette.
“None taken.” She grinned.
“And you two are buddies now?” I asked. Leti Montenegro was a badass and sweetheart all in one, but I didn’t know anyone who would end up being friends after all that.
“Pretty much,” the brunette said.
“Yup.” Only Leti could do something like that.
“So, are you going to tell us what has you drinking like a three-humped camel?” Leti bluntly asked, and I snorted, coughing up some of my cherry martini.
“Leti, it’s because men are…” I leaned forward, and the three women leaned in too. I looked over my shoulder and whispered, “Complicated.”
“Well, yeah.” “Duh.” “Mmmhmm.” One by one, all three agreed with me. Of course, they would! Girl power!
“She’s so drunk,” Nina giggled, and I frowned.
“I’m not dronk.” I caught the slur and covered my lips with my fingers as they giggled. “You know what I am?” I said and winced. Oops. That had been a little too loud. Oh well! It was Vegas, not Disneyland!
“What, sweetie?” Leti’s pretty friend, whose name I kept forgetting, asked. I felt like a jerk for not remembering, but I was too tipsy to retain anything other than how I was feeling about Sam.
“I’m just… I’m over the games. You know?” They nodded, and it made me a little dizzy, so I looked away, “College was for games and stuff… I’m graduated. Wait, I graduated.” There. I corrected myself.
“Oh brother,” Leti mumbled under her breath.
“I shouldn’t have to deal with bullshit. You know?”
“Babe, there are issues with Sam that I don’t think you—”
“I know all about it. Well, sorta. He’s shared some.” I sighed, resting my chin on my hand. “And I get it. I do,” I confessed, ignoring Leti and her friend’s confused looks , but it wasn’t my story to share. “I’m not asking for forever, like you and Brandon! You know? I’m not asking to be wooed on crazy dates like they do on The Bachelorette. I just…” I swallowed and blinked away the tears. “I want someone to care enough about me to try to be there.” How sad was that? “Being there isn’t about money or having your shit together. It’s about giving a shit. Especially when it’s hard.” My voice quickly lost its volume. “I didn’t have that after my mom died. My dad…”
“Was a dick.” Leti filled in, and the tears that were starting to pile up faded away and a smile crawled up on my face.
“Jesus, Leti!” Nina scolded, and I smiled, wiping away the wetness from my eyes.
“What? It’s true! Her dad’s a huge asshole,” Leti argued. “Macie is the shit, and he didn’t even go to ger graduation. No offense, Mace.”
“None taken.” I shrugged, smiling. “Anyhow, we hooked up with boundaries set up, and it made sense. It was only for the trip.” My tongue was way too loose.
“And now the lines are blurred?” Nina clued in, and I nodded.
“I know better, you know? You know I know better!”
“The heart wants what the heart wants,” Leti weirdly added. It surprised me because she wasn’t the sentimental type.
“Stupid, stupid heart,” I mumbled, finishing off my martini. When had I gotten to the bottom of that glass?
“You know what we need?” Leti’s friend, whose name again, for the fucking life of me, I couldn’t remember, chimed in. “We need to go dancing!” she said too excitedly, and I tilted my head in her direction, her suggestion marinating in my mind.
“Dancing? I don’t know…” Leave it to Nina to be the party pooper.
“Vegas has amazing clubs!” she shared. Rosalee! That was her name!
“We could go get new dresses and get all dolled up together.” Leti shrugged.
“And dance until our feet fall off!” Rosalee added, and I pointed at her.
“I like you.” I turned to my bestie. “Come on, Nina! Please! That sounds like so much fun!”
“Is this a girls thing or—”
“You can invite the guys.” Leti shrugged. “Brandon is going to be my bro-in-law, so he might as well know what kind of crazy comes along with you,” she teased, and Nina rolled her eyes.
“Fine,” she sighed. “I’ll call B and let him know.”
“YAY!” I cheered loudly, catching some stares from the other tables around us but not caring.
“But first you need to eat something,” she ordered, and I hugged her.
“Whatever you want, bestie friend ever.”
“Yeah, let’s get an extra breadbasket to soak up her lunch,” Leti mumbled, looking over her shoulder.
The men in my life might have been a hot mess, but thankfully the women in my life, my sisters from another mister, were the shiznit!
