It’s been a week since arriving at the Milazzo home, and I’m still not sure what to think. Matias has gone out of his way to prove he isn’t a horrible man, but flashes of the house fire that killed my parents when I was a child flip through my mind. At the end, when someone is carrying me out, it’s his face I see.
Which is impossible.
Why would he save me and why would he come into the house?
Unless he was the one who started it.
I shake the thought out of my head, because there is no way he’d do that to me or anyone. He seems too kind.
Then again, he is a mafia boss, and no man gets to that position by being kind. I just find it hard to believe that he’d start the fire, save me, and then all these years later, hire me as a nanny.
Unless, he wants to finish the job. I am the only one who survived the blaze.
But then why would he take me shopping and spend thousands of dollars on me?
I groan in frustration as I make lunch. I have too many conflicting thoughts going on. If they don’t make sense, then there is no reason why I should be thinking of them at all.
I flip the grilled cheese sandwich in the pan and scoop a ladle of tomato soup into a bowl. It’s homemade and I hope Matias likes it. I made enough for everyone.
“Ella? Lunch is ready,” I shout, and hear her little feet pounding down the hallway. She slides to a stop and almost runs into me while my hands are full. “Woah. Be careful,” I chuckle, not wanting to say it too harshly.
“Do you think we can go to the park today?” she asks, climbing onto the high barstool.
I set the soup and grilled cheese sandwich in front of her, and she digs in, the cheese stretching as she pulls it away from her mouth. Ella giggles the further away the creamy, yellow melted cheese gets.
“I’ll ask your dad when I take him lunch, okay? I don’t see why we can’t.” I bring down a tray from the cabinet, then a bowl, a small plate, and load it up with food. Then, I pair it with some sparkling water that I noticed he likes. “I’ll be right back.”
I head to his office, hearing his voice rising as he speaks to someone.
“I don’t give a fuck what it takes. You’ll find him. He will not steal from me. When you have him, bring him to me.” I hear him smack the phone on the receiver.
Swallowing, I choose to knock.
“What?” The word sharp as a knife with frustration.
I enter the room with his lunch, not meeting his eyes. “I’m sorry to bother you. I’ll just leave this here.”
Right as I set the tray down, his fingers encompass my wrist.
“Wait— I’m sorry, Sophie. I didn’t mean to yell at you.” His thumb rubs over my inner wrist and I can’t remember how to breathe because of his touch. “It’s been a rough morning. I found out one of my runners stole from me. I’m not happy, but it’s not a reason to take it out on you.”
“You didn’t know it was me. It’s okay.”
I can tell by his stare that he doesn’t believe me, then sees his lunch. “Tomato soup and grilled cheese? I haven’t had this since I was a child.” He sits in his chair, contemplating the meal in front of him. I should have asked if he even liked it. Great. “This looks delicious… Thank you.” He dips the sandwich into the soup, taking a huge bite, then groans.
That sound does something to my entire body. His eyes close and his tongue flicks out to lick the tomato soup from his lip. “God, that’s good.”
“I’m glad. I was wondering if I could take Ella back to the park? She’s asking and I’d love to get her around kids again.”
He nods and swallows. “I don’t see why not. I can’t go with you, but Gianni will.”
“Oh, it’s okay. You don’t have to do that. I’ll be fine.”
“There’s no way I’m letting my daughter or you out of this house without protection. Never trust anyone outside this house. Now that you’ve been seen with me, it won’t be long before it might cause you issues.”
“Issues, as in, another mafia boss could kidnap me?”
“Yes.”
Well, he doesn’t hold back any punches.
I gulp, wondering if I made the right decision taking this job. “I understand.”
“You won’t be gone long?” he questions, finishing his grilled cheese sandwich.
“I’m not sure, why?”
“I was hoping we could have a movie night. I have a theater—”
“—How about just the living room? In front of that beautiful fireplace.”
“I can have a TV installed by the time you get home.”
I was about to argue, but I really wanted a night in front of the fireplace, and I knew better than to fight with a man who has more money than I’ve ever seen in my life.
“Sounds great. I’ll see you later then. I’m going to get Ella ready, and we will be ready to go.”
“Gianni will be waiting out front for you,” he says, polishing off the soup already.
“I can take that—” I reach for it, but he slides it out of the way.
“Nonsense. I can do it. You’d be surprised what all I can do, Ms. Matthews.”
I nibble on my bottom lip, thinking about all the things I wouldn’t be surprised at all that he could do. “Okay,” I manage to say. “I will leave you to wash your own dish.”
I hurry out of the room, closing the door behind me, and sigh as I lean against it.
Holy hell, that man has power.
I don’t stand a chance.
“Ella!” I shout. “Make sure you get ready. We’re going to the park.”
A loud shrieking pierces the air while her tiny footsteps cause such loud stomps. I chuckle, getting myself ready. I stay in the same pair of jeans and long sleeve shirt, but slip on my Converse shoes. I pack a bag of snacks, juice, and water.
I’m barely at the front door for a minute when Ella comes flying through the foyer.
“I’m ready. I’m ready! Let’s go!”
“Say bye to your dad,” I tell her, pointing to his office.
She snags my hand and pulls me out the door. “Bye, Daddy!”
I hear his voice echo from behind the doors, and I can just imagine the gorgeous smile that paints his face as he speaks. “Bye, Ella Bella. Have fun. Be safe. Love you.”
“Love you too!” Her eyes are straight ahead, locked on the car, and I nearly miss grabbing the handle to shut the door because she’s tugging me so hard.
“Slow down. The park isn’t going anywhere,” I muse, finding her excitement adorable.
Gianni opens the car door for us, and she leaps into her booster seat, buckling herself in.
“Let’s go! Let’s go!” she shouts.
I toss the bag in and take a seat. “You heard the lady, Gianni.”
He cracks a smile, shaking his head before closing us in and hurrying around the front of the car. As Gianni puts on his seatbelt, I look to the right to see Matias standing by his window. Our eyes lock as he watches us drive away. He lifts his hand to wave goodbye, and I do the same in return, wondering why it feels like I’m leaving something important behind.
He’s just a man. A man I barely know. A man who is dangerous and would hurt me in the long run, anyway. The chemistry between us needs to stop. A way to do that would be to meet someone else. I should start dating again and leave Mr. Milazzo as my boss.
Only my boss.
Ella has on headphones while watching Paw Patrol on the small screen that unfolds from the ceiling, while Gianni drives. I’m lost in my thoughts about Matias. I don’t even realize when we pull into the parking lot.
“Where do you want to go first? Playground or Carousel?”
“The playground.”
“You got it.” I climb out of the car and swing the bag over my shoulder, take Ella’s hand, and walk to the massive playground. It’s overwhelming. There are swings, monkey bars, slides, a water pad, anything and everything a kid could want, it is here.
I don’t have to peer behind me to see Gianni. I feel his presence. His shadow follows us to make sure we are safe.
I take a seat on an empty bench and drop the bag next to me. “Ella, make sure you stay where I can see you, okay? And you don’t talk to strangers. You don’t walk away with anyone. Understand?”
She rolls her eyes at me. “I know that. Daddy taught me that. Never talk to strangers.”
“That’s right. Okay, go, go have fun. I’ll be right here if you need me.” I didn’t bring a book or anything to keep me busy. My eyes are going to stay locked on Ella. I cannot lose Matias Milazzo’s daughter. If I do, I’m sure my body will never be discovered again.
Immediately, Ella makes a friend. Another girl. She has braided red hair and fair skin with a hefty amount of freckles. She looks adorable.
What would Matias think about setting up play dates with new friends? I’ll have to talk to him about that.
Ella runs with a big smile on her face while her new friend chases her. I think they might be playing tag by the looks of it.
“Which one is yours?”
I glance up to see a very handsome man sitting down next to me. He has salt and pepper hair and green eyes, the color of the sea on a beautiful day. He is wearing slacks and a button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled to the elbow.
Why do men become so much hotter when they do that?
“I’m sorry. I don’t know you and I’m not going to point out which child is mine,” I say with a tight smile.
“I understand. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. My daughter is the redhead right there. Her name is Gwen,” he states. “I can prove it.”
“By all means.”
“Gwen!” he shouts, his daughter stopping in her tracks as she chases Ella. “Come here.”
Gwen whispers something to Ella and the two girls skip towards us hand in hand. Kids make having friendships seem so easy. I miss that kind of carefree life.
“Is everything okay, Nanny Sophie? Did we do something wrong?” Ella asks, snagging a juice box from the bag.
“No, nothing is wrong. Are you having fun?”
“Yes! Gwen is so fun.”
“Are you hungry or thirsty?” the stranger asks his daughter.
“Nope. I’m fine, Daddy.”
“Great. Okay, go on. Be careful,” he says.
And just like that, they are off running around the playground again.
I chuckle and admit defeat. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be such a bitch about it. I’m Sophie.” I hold out my hand.
“Dean.” He takes my hand and squeezes it lightly. “Don’t apologize for looking after your child. I would have done the same thing. I guess it’s a little weird for a stranger to come up to you and just start talking.” He places a hand against the middle of his chest and smiles genuinely. “I apologize for that. I just wanted to come sit next to the prettiest woman at the playground.”
I toss my head back and laugh, cheeks heating from the obvious pickup line. “Do you say that to all the women at the playground?”
He crinkles his nose at the distaste of his line. “It was bad, wasn’t it? God, I’m sorry. It’s been a while since I’ve done this.”
I can’t stop smiling. “It’s okay. It wasn’t a bad line. It was… sweet. Only if you were sincere?” I state, hoping he hears the question.
“Very.” He scoots a little closer, keeping his eyes on me until a loud happy squeal rings through the air, ruining the moment.
I look away, watching Ella on the swing.
“So, I heard her call you Nanny Sophie. Who do you nanny for, if you don’t mind me asking?”
A flip in my stomach tells me that’s something I always need to keep to myself. I can’t imagine what would happen if people find out I work for Mr. Milazzo.
“I’m sorry. I can’t talk about who I nanny for. I hope you understand.”
His brows raise in surprise, but he doesn’t seem angered. “No, it’s okay. I understand. Your job must be very hard—” A hand on Dean’s shoulder stops him midsentence.
We turn our heads to see Matias standing there behind the bench. Even behind the dark lens of his sunglasses, his eyes are on me, and the scowl twisting his lips says everything that needs to be said.
He isn’t happy.
“Her job is hard, but you speaking to her only makes it harder.”
“Excuse me?” Dean stands to defend himself. “She’s a single, capable woman who can speak for herself.”
Matias grips Dean by the shirt and yanks him across the bench.
“Seriously? At the playground? Get it together,” I hiss, then plaster on a fake smile as people walk by. “This is not okay. Matias, back off.”
He doesn’t listen. “She is capable. She can speak for herself, but do not think she is single because she is here alone.”
“And who are you to speak for her?” Dean asks, ripping himself away from Matias’s grip.
“Matias Milazzo.”
The color drains from Dean’s face as he takes a step away. “You work for the mafia?”
“Mafia,” Matias snorts. “That’s all hearsay, isn’t it?” Matias walks around the bench and takes a seat. “But I’d go if I were you.”
“Matias,” I clip his name in frustration.
“Gwen!” Dean shouts. “Gwen, we are leaving!”
“I don’t want to leave.” Gwen cries from the monkey bars.
“We will come back another time.” Dean rushes to his daughter and snags her, running in the other direction and leaving Ella alone, wondering what she did.
I stand to run after him to explain that I am single when a hand wraps around my wrist and tugs me to the bench.
“Leave him.”
I rip my hand from his grip. “How dare you? Who the hell do you think you are? You are my boss. You don’t get to decide who I spend my time with.”
He wraps an arm around my waist and tugs me to his side, then grips the side of my hair, and tugs. Matias forces my head down so he can whisper in my ear.
I hate to admit it, but the roughness is turning me on more than I am mad.
“Make no mistake, Sweet Sophie, you are mine. You and I both know that.”
I lick my dry lips, my heart pounding with desire as he drags his lips across my neck. “I only work for you,” I say weakly, my voice shaking. I can’t believe he would be so blunt about whatever has been going on between us.
He scoffs out a laugh, but it’s dark and full of disbelief. “Whatever you need to tell yourself.”
I somehow find the strength to pull away from his magnetism, but it’s difficult. The more I try, the more I want to sink into his embrace. He is a force, a pull, and resisting is nearly impossible.
He can’t get away with thinking he can control my life.
“Just because I’m your nanny doesn’t make me your property, Matias.” I stand, stepping away. “You are my boss. This can’t happen. And for you to come here and interrupt a good day because of your… ego? I’m actually not sure why you came at all. Now, Ella is playing by herself when she had met a friend. You shouldn’t have been thinking about me, but about Ella. You could have talked to me if you think it’s inappropriate for me to speak to other people while I’m with your daughter.”
He’s up and in front of my face before I can blink. He towers over me. His scent invades my headspace and causes me to lose my train of thought. There’s a hint of his body wash, something with pine like all men use, but his cologne is different. It’s warm, reminding me of the sweet twist of honey bourbon and how it slips down your throat with ease.
“It isn’t about you talking to people when you’re with Ella. It’s about you talking to other men. With or without Ella. You feel this between us, and you can fight it all you want, but you can’t ignore there’s something here. So yes, when I find out there’s a man wanting what I want, I tend to go a little feral. You are mine in my mind, Sophie. Right here.” He taps his temple. “But if it helps you, then you need to know, you will be mine.” His voice deepens to such a low point, the baritone rasps.
The kids laughing and running around us fade away. All that’s left is me and him, the breeze trying to push me closer, and the curious watchful eyes of Gianni.
“I won’t be,” I manage to say, hating that I have to say it. “While I can feel something here, it’s something that cannot happen. I don’t trust men like you to be in my life so intimately, Matias. Men like you changed my entire life for the worse when I was younger. Men like you take. I refuse to be another object of your desires only to leave me wounded again.” I hike the bag that’s full of snacks up onto my shoulder.
He stares at me, lost, a bit hurt, and I can tell he has no idea what to say to that. “I am not those men,” he says in a whisper just as Ella runs and slams against his legs.
We’ll see about that.
“You came!” Ella squeals.
He looks down and the turmoil on his face disappears when he sees Ella. The smile is real. He is so happy to see her. He picks her up and swings her around.
“I couldn’t stay away from you. I had to come see you. Have you tried the monkey bars?”
She rolls her eyes. “Daddy, you know I can’t reach them yet.”
He scoffs and starts walking. “I’m here now. You can do anything.”
He makes it so hard to fight him when he is such an amazing father. Maybe he isn’t the kind of man to take until there is nothing left, but it’s a chance I’m not willing to risk. Matias is powerful, in more ways than one. He has the ability to play me like a damn violin until all my strings break. I can build myself back up, connect the strings again, but instruments never sound the same when their originality is broken.
I watch from the bench as Matias helps Ella onto the monkey bars. He looks so out of place in his expensive suit, but he’s just like any other parent. He stays with Ella the entire time, his arms open and ready to catch her so she doesn’t fall and hurt herself.
“You’re doing it! You’re almost there!” he celebrates her as she swings her body to grab the other bar.
She’s nowhere near close to the end. She’s four bars in, but his belief in her causes Ella to smile, pushing her forward.
“He isn’t like those men. None of the Milazzo brothers are takers. They are givers.” Gianni sits down next to me and crosses one leg over the other.
“You told him someone was talking to me. That would be the only way he would know.”
“I did.” He doesn’t bother lying.
“Why? You had no right to do that. I am my own person. I can choose who I want to spend time with.”
“Whether you like it or not, Sophie, your life will never be the same. You agreed to that when you took this job. If you want other men in your life, you need to be prepared that Matias is willing to fight to be the only man you consider.”
“Why?” I ask, just as Ella screams.
Gianni and I both stand thinking she fell and hurt herself, but she’s jumping up and own and Matias is swinging her around. When he sets her on the ground, she bolts to me.
“Sophie! Nanny Sophie, did you see me? I did it!”
“I did see you. You did such a great job.”
“How about we get ice cream to celebrate?” Matias asks.
Ice cream seems to be a common theme in this family.
Sad? Ice cream. Happy? Ice cream. Celebration? Ice cream.
There’s no fault in that logic.
“Because he knows a gem when he sees one, Sophie. To him, you’re the rarest of them all,” Gianni whispers, so no one else can hear.
His words still my breath and I watch them walk ahead of me. There’s no way he feels like that so soon.
But why do I feel the same?
