Go ahead and say it.
I was wrong.
Until about five minutes ago, I thought the biggest mistake of my life was abandoning a lovable grouch of a man plus the best job I’ll probably ever have thanks to said lovable grouch and his dumb mouth.
Nope.
Turns out, my biggest mistake was getting in the car with this babbling psychopath.
How did I never notice how strange Troy Clement is?
We’re outside Seattle now, and this is definitely not the way to the UPS store or the airport.
The way the rain keeps coming, it’s hard to tell exactly where we are.
But that smug smile he always wears is gone and he’s driving like a bat out of hell.
He keeps muttering to himself—whining about his own ‘jackass stupidity’—and I’m long past scared.
I managed to send Cole a semi-clear picture of a mile marker not too far back, and then sent the same blurry image to Dakota. All while trying to hide my screen from Troy.
Everyone must be out fighting the rain on their own, though, because neither of them have responded.
“Hey, Troy, any idea how the route looks now?” I ask, trying so hard to keep my voice neutral, free from panic.
“Yeah. We’ll be at UPS shortly. I know a better store out this way,” he says coldly.
I frown, wiping the condensation from the side window, peering at nothing but more wet darkness. “Oh. I thought you didn’t want me mailing the necklace? It’s okay, I can always do it from San Diego…”
“Not my choice.” He gives me a frosty, almost menacing look that chills me to the bone. “Nothing ever fucking is.”
Big yikes.
His eyes flick to my hands again, focusing on the small black turtle still dangling idly from the chain. He’s been staring at it for the last five minutes, ever since I made the mistake of fidgeting with the necklace again.
Not good. He needs to keep his eyes on the road.
“Why do you keep looking?” I ask gently.
He clenches the steering wheel so hard it’s amazing he doesn’t snap a finger.
“Doing what?” He flicks his eyes back to the road.
“You keep staring at my hands and the necklace… I’m not in the driver’s seat, but if you don’t watch the road, we could have an accident.”
With a nasty curl of his lip, he stomps the gas, flying into heavy sheets of rain. His eyes land on my hands again, anchored on that turtle.
“I know how to drive, Eliza. Relax,” he growls.
Oh, okay. I’ll just lie back and start Googling funeral arrangements while he rams us head-on into a truck.
I take a deep breath, trying my best not to explode.
“Please tell me what’s going on? Troy, I’m serious.”
He answers with another dull chuckle that sounds like there’s nobody home behind the silver spark in his eyes. “You want to know? Fuck it. First, what did Cole tell you about Aster’s suicide?”
Huh?
“Not much. He just told me he didn’t have all the details. Her death was strange and untimely, he said.”
Blinding headlights flash in my eyes. A long, blaring honk from a passing truck cuts through the storm.
For a second, I’m about to scream, but it whips past.
A red car swerves ahead just behind it and goes skidding off the road, sending a wave of water spraying across our windshield. The lights skim diagonally over Troy’s wild-eyed snarl.
“Oh my God,” I whisper, gripping my thigh.
“Dickheads! They should pay more attention to the storm, right?” His voice is pure ice.
You were probably in their lane, jackass.
“We should stop. What if they’re hurt?” I venture, latching on to any small reason to get away from this madness.
I’ll take my chances getting drenched.
But he’s not stopping. The car speeds up, lurching ahead faster.
“Troy!”
“Not our problem. You’ve got a flight to catch and I’m not going to make you late.” The worst part is, he almost sounds normal now.
Jesus, what have I gotten myself into?
“Troy, it doesn’t matter. I can always take a later plane. They…they slid off the road. They could be hurt, and I think it might be because—”
He snorts loudly, sending me a caustic look. “Don’t be so dramatic. There’s plenty of traffic around, and someone else will call it in. They’ll just have to wait for a tow truck, that’s all.”
I hope he’s right.
I hope something stops him before we’re a lot less lucky than the spinout car.
And his eyes are on my hand again. I know it before I even look.
“Troy, please,” I whisper. “You need to watch the road.”
“You know what I don’t need?” he asks quietly.
“What?”
“Directions from a twenty-something who thinks she’s hot shit because she slept with the CEO and got a job she didn’t deserve.”
My breath cuts off and my face goes hot.
He laughs again, and I finally notice how cruel that loud, obnoxious laugh of his sounds.
“You’re not going to try to deny it, huh? Or does my driving freak you out that much?”
I glance over, trying not to glare. “I had the job first. Long before Cole and I ever…”
“Ever what?” he urges.
“Jesus. I didn’t do anything underhanded to get the job. I already had it. Not that it’s any of your business,” I add, probably against my better judgment.
Again, that horrible grinding laugh echoes through the car. “Good for you! What did he say about me?”
I stare at him. “What do you mean?”
“Cole. Old friend, old buddy, old bossman. What the fuck did he say about me, Eliza?”
Just when I didn’t think the eerie glint in his eyes could get crazier…
“Not much, honestly. Before Hawaii, he never mentioned you much at all.”
You’re not that important, prick.
“Did he ever mention me when he talked about Aster?”
I blink slowly.
What is he talking about?
“No. But why would he? Everyone says she was sick and killed herself. No big mystery.”
“I was there that week,” he says, his voice dropping an octave to this soft, restless rumble. “I thought my name would come up.”
“He might have told me you were there when it happened. I don’t remember.” I don’t have to lie about that. I’m sure this road trip with a psycho is doing wonders for my memory.
“E-liz-ah,” he sings my name in three eerie syllables. “Think harder. I need you to remember what your boyfriend said about me.”
I eye him for a minute, not wanting to, pushing down the lump of ice in my throat.
“Troy, you know how Cole is. He cares about two things: Wired Cup and himself. And yeah, to be fair, he cares about Destiny, too. He barely ever mentioned you. I’m really not sure what you’re looking for.”
When I shake my head, it feels so light it could float away.
He inhales sharply, squeezing the steering wheel a few times, pumping blood in and out of his fingers.
“What?” I force out when I can’t take the killing silence. “Troy, what is it you’re so worried about?”
“Right now, you, Miss Eliza. You really shouldn’t bullshit a master bullshitter.”
What the hell does that mean?
I glare at him, searching his face for any way to deescalate this total insanity.
“You really want the truth?” I whisper, racking my brain. “He says…he says you’re immature and self-centered.”
He tosses his head from side to side. “Fuck him. He always said that about her.”
“Her?” I echo dryly.
“He thought Aster was self-centered. But she wasn’t nearly as self-centered as he thinks. He was always too harsh on her, too serious when she just wanted to have fun. He didn’t fucking deserve her, and if he wasn’t Mr. Gold Dick, she’d have never married him in a billion years.”
I swallow again, another lump of fear scratching my throat.
It’s the first thing he’s said that sounds genuinely connected to someone else.
“You knew her well then?” I ask.
His eyes flick to the turtle again. “Never well enough. Don’t try to make it something it wasn’t.”
“I’m not trying to make it anything.”
“Whatever. Can’t say I like your tone or the way you’re looking at me like—oh, shit!” He jerks the wheel.
We’re sliding—right into the other lane with its oncoming traffic.
I brace for the bone-splitting impact that’s surely coming.
But Troy finds traction at the last second, wrenching us back into our lane.
I hold my breath. Shaking.
Maybe we’ll end up in a ditch, and if I’m lucky I can make a proper run for it.
But this stupid turtle is driving him crazy.
It’s going to get us both killed, so I pull the chain, reeling it in so I can drop it in my purse.
“Leave it out!” he screams.
I jump, nearly dropping the necklace on the floor.
“It seems like it’s bothering you.” I take a deep breath. “You know what, you can have it, if you want. I’ll leave it and let you decide what you want to do with it. Can you just let me out at the next gas station? Even a bus shelter or—anywhere, really? I can manage.”
His gaze snaps to me like he’s seriously considering it, his face set like stone.
“Troy…”
“If you give me that fucking curse before you get out of this car,” he whispers.
Oh my God.
I might live after all.
Still suspicious, I look at him and whisper, “Why does it mean so much to you?”
“Didn’t I tell you? We can’t let Destiny get that goddamn thing. She doesn’t need to be reminded of Aster again. She damn sure doesn’t need to go squawking to her old man, either.”
I sense the car speeding up as he glares into the rain.
Here we go again.
He has a death grip on the wheel, his hands pressed so tight his knuckles are bone-white.
“Troy, I’m in no hurry. You can slow down until we see the next gas station. It’s fine.”
“Not fine!” he roars. “Goddammit, don’t you understand?”
I really don’t.
So far, I haven’t understood much of this conversation at all. I just know I don’t want to set this guy off more.
“What don’t I understand, Troy?” I ask gently, holding back tears.
It’s weird how people talk to hurt animals and dangerous lunatics with the same soothing voice.
“I never meant to do it. I never meant for any of this shit to happen. And…and if I thought you could just disappear and keep your yap shut, I wouldn’t have more regrets.” His sigh sounds like a death rattle. “But you won’t, will you? You won’t just give me that piece of shit and get on with your life?”
“Whatever you want,” I whisper, gripping my thigh to keep my hand from shaking. “Troy, I—I don’t even know what you didn’t mean to do. I don’t need to know. You can drop me off and you’ll never have to think of me again.”
“Oh, fuck you, Eliza.” He’s straining to breathe, almost gasping, his huge shoulders rolling and his nostrils flared.
Holy shit.
“These goddamned things never stay buried,” he whispers. “They always surface—always!—just like that fucking sea turtle. After I tried so hard to get rid of it.”
I’m reeling.
What is he talking about?
When he looks at me again, his face is blood-red. He takes a hand off the wheel to point at my hand. “That thing. That miserable fucking thing. No matter what I do, it keeps coming back, and so does everything else—”
A loud, wet screech cuts him off.
Aaand we’re hydroplaning again.
I’m not even sure we’re on all four wheels this time.
I’m guaranteed to die tonight, I just don’t know how yet.
“Y-you can have the n-necklace, Troy,” I try, stumbling over my words. “I’ve already told you…”
“No. I’m cleaning house once and for all. Tonight, everything goes.”
“Like what? What goes?” My gut sinks.
Dread consumes me.
I’m afraid the biggest thing that’s going, going, gone is me.
While he drives on, no longer responding like he’s retreated fully into his own crazy brain, I text a group chat I have with my parents.
I love you.
Then I text Cole one last time. I hate how things ended, and I’m sorry. I don’t blame you anymore, though. You can’t help that we’re from two different worlds any more than I can. You had good reason to look into Aster again. I love you.
The car skids to an unexpected halt, making me look up.
I let out a slow breath and look out the passenger window, but between the heavy rain and the darkness, I don’t see much.
No cars, no buildings, and only faint, blurry lights. But at least we’ve stopped somewhere.
I reach for the door, eager to get away. But where are we?
“Turn your phone off. Stay calm,” he bites off. “It’s just a marina.”
A marina? Why the hell would we go to a marina on such a stormy night?
I open the door and step into ankle-deep water.
That’s when I decide it’s now or never.
I bolt as he screams after me, hoofing it as fast as a person can through streams of water swirling around my feet.
I have no idea where I’ll go or how I’ll get away from this guy, but right now action is my only hope.
There’s a building in the distance, maybe a boathouse or a bar or something.
Please, for the love of God, let it be open. Anywhere with people.
But something hits me from the back just when I start to make out the door, slamming me to the ground.
I splash down on my hands and knees, hitting a puddle of murky water and cracked concrete face-first.
Two big, angry arms wrap around my stomach, pulling me up like a puppet. “Just try anything cute like that again, bitch. C’mon. We’re taking a boat ride.”
My heart sinks to my knees.
“In this weather?” I sputter.
That laugh. That ugly, maniacal, throaty laugh.
I cringe. If I make it out of this alive, I’ll be hearing it in my nightmares for a long time to come. But right now, even walking away feels like a big ask.
“That’s the point, sweet cheeks,” he snarls in my ear. “Who could ever deny an accident in these conditions?” He leans forward, shoving something hard into my back. “Yes, it’s a gun. Pull another stunt like that and I’ll shoot your spine in half.”
Oh, God.
Oh, God, I’m shaking and I don’t have any choice but to listen.
I look around helplessly. There’s no one through the haze.
Just flat pavement and that taunting, blinding rain, all the way to the docks.
So when he leads me down to where the boats are, I don’t fight. We stalk along rows of tall ships tied up and soldiering together on the stormy sea.
Troy pushes us forward, stopping near a small boat. When we climb on, he drags me to the main cabin, opens a tall door, and shoves me inside.
“Sit!” he barks. “Don’t move.”
There are only two seats. Shivering, I sit down on what looks like the passenger seat next to the controls.
I just hope I don’t wind up tied to this chair while the cabin floods.
“I know what you’re thinking, Eliza, but I’m no monster.” So says the guy who’s dragging me to a watery grave. “One mistake ten years ago and it balloons into this. She seduced me, you know. Good enough to fuck, but not to love. Cole just can’t let her go, and neither can I.”
I hug myself, the words not registering at first.
The woman Cole loved…his wife, his one and only, seduced another man? His best friend?
“What do you mean?” I ask absently.
His jaw clenches, but he doesn’t say anything more.
As much as I hate him, I should make him talk.
I just wonder if I’m buying myself precious time or only prolonging my torture.
I’m so not ready to die.
“What happened?” I force out.
His eyes flick to me, bright like boiling mercury.
“Their marriage was already a dumpster fire. That shit had nothing to do with me. The kid, she was the final straw. Aster had a ‘wicked stepmother.’” He chuckles, shaking his head. “That’s what she called her, anyway, but Aster could be dramatic. You had to know her. Anyhow, that’s why she wouldn’t cut Cole loose from a miserable marriage. She didn’t want that for Destiny, another woman butting into her life.”
I stare at him numbly as he shoves his face in his palms, stretching his skin before he glowers at me again.
“Everyone acts like she was a terrible mom. She couldn’t deal with the kid—it didn’t come naturally with her issues—but fuck, she loved Destiny. She tried. If she hadn’t been so jealous of the nannies, it wouldn’t have been so bad. It’s like she thought Cole had it in him to start fucking strange women behind her back.” Troy pauses and snorts. “I wish. It never would’ve happened if he’d just cheated. No, he had to stick around like a stubborn goddamned mule, expecting too much from her—”
“Too much?” I whisper.
Troy nods. “Just because he walks around like he’s citizen of the year doesn’t mean he isn’t a demanding cock. You already know. Every time he told her why he stuck around—because he took their marriage seriously—it stressed her the fuck out. By the end, she only stayed with Cole because she didn’t want him falling in love again. She couldn’t stand anybody else coming into the picture for Destiny.”
He sighs and then pulls a cigarette from his pocket. Flicking the lighter sounds like a gunshot.
I watch the smoke, curling from the tip like a wagging finger.
“A year before that last trip, we all spent a long winter in Hawaii,” he says, pausing to inhale again. “Let’s just say it turned into something special. Something beautiful. Something between Aster and me happened neither of us wanted to end. She wanted it too—or so I thought.”
She wanted it too. That sounds so gross and rapey it takes all my willpower to keep listening to this deranged story.
But I can’t cut him off.
Not when it’s the only thing keeping me alive.
“We stayed in touch after they went home to the mainland. We wrote old-school letters back and forth constantly. We texted. Shit, some nights, Cole would lie there in bed with her, dumb and oblivious. She’d be up until dawn talking to me.” He grins like he’s so proud of it.
I try not to gag, wishing I could punch him.
He flicks ash on the floor before continuing. “When we could arrange it, we’d meet up in swanky hotels and resorts on her wellness retreats. Sure, we fucked like rabbits, but it was more, Eliza. We mapped out a future.” He smiles bitterly. “Cole thought she was frigid? Fuck that. She was an ice queen for him. And he paid so little attention to his wife, he had no clue. That last trip, it was obvious there was nothing between them. She all but hated him. He saw her as a burden—a bitchy, overstressed nuisance who just happened to live with him.”
“Cole?” I can’t see it.
That’s not the man I know.
It’s Troy’s warped version of the truth.
“Yeah, yeah, I know.” He nods in agreement when I haven’t said a word. “The jackass didn’t know what he had. But I never meant for our talk that night to get so heated. I didn’t—”
He stops, flinging a look at me that’s all murderous suspicion again.
“Talk? What talk, Troy?”
“Aw, fuck.” His face falls. “I gave Aster an ultimatum. I told her to leave Cole for me—or else I was ending it. I was sick of the sneaking around, playing second fiddle, getting paid by a dude who kept my woman on a leash. She wouldn’t leave him…”
I lean forward slightly, feigning interest in this horror story.
“And…and when I told her it was over on the beach, she screamed. She said she didn’t care if he knew because he’d never leave her because of Destiny. And she refused to do it, too. So she said it’d be fine if Cole knew about us. Hell, it’s like she wanted him to know. As if the three of us could just go along our merry, fucked up little way. She didn’t care that I’d lose my job. She came from money and she didn’t fucking get it.”
I shiver.
“What did you do?”
“Ifuckingpanicked, okay?” It comes out like one rushed, awful word. “I didn’t want to be caught on the beach with my boss’ wife, but I didn’t mean to grab her. She pushed me first, tripped me over a rock. I fell in the sand. She wouldn’t stop yelling—she just wouldn’t shut the fuck up,” he growls, staring at the glowing end of his cigarette. “Still. I only wanted to drag her into the water to cool her off. Make her stop kicking. I damn sure didn’t mean to hold her under that long. I just wanted her to be quiet. I…I lost control.”
“Holy shit. You drowned her.”
Whoops. It’s too late to take back my words.
He looks at me like he’s about to use that gun.
“Wait, I mean, are you sure you drowned her, though? I heard they found her shoes on the beach, but they thought she could’ve gone off a cliff, right?”
He gives me a smile that scars my soul. “That was me. I dragged her up the hiking trail and flung her back down to make it look like an accident. The rain that morning washed away the footprints.”
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
I’m going to pass out.
He dragged a dead woman up a cliff to throw her back into the ocean, and he’s proud of it.
But his face contorts back into the angry, sad expression he’s worn all night.
“It was ruled an accident. Whenever anybody doubted it, I had the suicide theory to fall back on. For ten goddamn years, it worked—until you popped up. You made Destiny go pawing through her mom’s things—”
“What? Troy, no. I didn’t tell her to look for anything—”
“No? She didn’t bother until you showed up.”
I inhale sharply. “She hadn’t been back to Hawaii before then, remember? That was all her, trying to make peace with what happened…”
I’m not sure why I’m still reasoning with a rabid dog.
He balls his fists up and swings them back and forth at his sides before pounding on the ship’s cabin several times. The noise reverberates through the night.
I wince.
“Are you that stupid, witch? Just you being there made her more curious about the mother she’d lost. I kept everything under wraps for years, and now it’s spilling everywhere.” He folds his arms over his chest. “But it won’t. It can’t. Just as soon as I get rid of you and your mouth, I’m back to square one. Just another well-paid nobody who doesn’t matter. If Cole forgets I exist in his grief, all the better.”
I stare right through him.
“Still a goddamned shame about the girl. I never meant for those guys to hurt her…” He makes a frustrated sound, shaking his head.
My stomach lurches.
After listening to this maniac’s sick excuses, I knew it.
But hearing him confirm it cuts me open.
“Was Aster wearing that necklace the night she—” I can’t make myself say died. Somehow, admitting she died—admitting he murdered her—feels like I’m accepting the same fate. “—the night they found her?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” He raises his fist over his head.
I flinch.
But he pulls back at the last second and the cabin echoes with his rough sigh.
“If you weren’t there, they would’ve moped their way through the whole trope. Dess wouldn’t have set one foot on the beach, much less gone pilfering through that dejected house. All of this could’ve been avoided. You’re the reason he hired an investigator. You and the goddamned feelings you stirred up. You made them think too much. Now you want to go reminding Destiny of Aster nonstop with that ugly fucking knockoff?”
“Well…”
He lunges, stopping just short of hitting me again. “I worked so hard! So fucking hard to save her the pain—both of them—and you just waltz in like a wrecking ball whore.” He glares at me, his eyes mean slits. “You may be good enough to be Cole’s fucktoy, but you’re not fit to hold Aster’s tea—”
“Wait.” I grit my teeth. “Hold on. You’re getting this out. That’s good. It must’ve been hell bottling it up for years.” I grimace, hating that I’m pretending to have sympathy for this hideous man. “So, are you really upset because you think someone might find out what you did or because Destiny wears her jewelry?”
“Both!” he bellows, throwing his head back.
“So that’s it. You’re going to kill me, aren’t you?” I ask flatly.
“What the hell else can I do? You go, you’ll run to the police or that big, sappy idiot the first chance you get.” He stares, waiting for an argument or at least a lie. “Don’t worry, though. Cole won’t get his happily ever after. It’s his fault she’s dead. He drove her away, and he already did the same with you in record time.”
My heart twists.
Everything that drove us apart seems so petty now, so pathetic in the grand scheme.
And now I’ll never get the chance for either of us to set things right.
“If you kill me, it’s not going down like you think,” I warn, summoning my fiercest glare. “You won’t get away with this like you did with Aster. You’ll go away for life. There’s no chance my parents ever let it go. And neither will Cole—not without hunting you to whatever island cave you crawl back to.”
His eyes flash with cruel amusement. “I might care if I thought there was a chance he had a clue. He doesn’t.”
“I texted him,” I say, knowing it’s a huge risk. “When he finds out I’m dead and who I was with, guess what he’ll do?”
His eyes beam pure murder at me. “Then I’ll just kill him, too.”
“O-kay. Good luck, I guess. So you’ve got me, Cole—oh, and Dakota Burns. I sent her another message. And if you kill Dakota, you’ll definitely have to kill Lincoln, or he’ll kill you. You might have a one percent chance of getting through one hardass billionaire’s security, but two? I’m not liking your odds, dude.”
“How many people did you text?” he flares, his fists trembling at his sides.
“As many as I could?” I smile.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
One day, I hope I’ll laugh at the irony of his question.
“At first, I thought we were going to have a wreck. I had no idea you were a full-blown psycho killer, but hey, it’s almost like insurance. If you kill me, you’ve got a whole laundry list to deal with. Or you can just let me go and hightail it out of the country while you still can,” I say hopefully.
“Goddamn,” he mutters. “Do you need a reminder your life is hanging by a thread?”
“Is it?” I spit at him.
“And Cole had the nuts to call Aster stubborn! You’re one dumb uppity cunt,” he snaps.
I shrug. “Hey, if I’m dumb and alive… Whatever, though. If I’m going to die anyway, I might as well get my zingers in while I can, right?”
He cocks his head like he’s considering it.
Christ on a cracker.
He’s so deranged we’re actually having a mundane conversation between his casual comments about slaughtering me.
I’ve got to keep him talking, though. If his mouth is running, he can’t just shoot me.
“Do you have chocolate, Troy?” I ask.
“Chocolate?”
I offer a wry smile. “You know, something sweet, a last meal sort of thing.”
He pauses, considering it before shaking his head. “Whatever you ate for lunch will have to do. This isn’t prison, lady. What the hell do I look like?”
I laugh loudly.
“What’s so funny?”
“I’m just lovin’ the irony here. You’re a funny, funny guy, Mr. Clement. Criminals get last meals, but I don’t. And besides accidentally meeting Cole and Destiny, I’ve done nothing wrong.”
He turns away and stomps out the door. I watch his silhouette through the rain. It looks like he’s pulling up the anchor.
When he comes back inside, he’s reaching into the waistband of his pants.
Ugh. Do I even want to know? “What are you doing?”
He turns back to face me, but before he’s even spun around, I can tell from his shadow there’s something in his hands.
I gasp, forgetting how to breathe.
Looks like I won’t be talking my way out of this.
I’m on a boat, heading out to sea, with no one around for miles.
Cole, I’m so flipping sorry, I think miserably. I wish I could’ve been the one to love you like Aster never did.
Whatever dumb things you said aside, I wish you’d let me be yours.
