(Five years ago)
“Sammi?” I whisper-shout into the dark night as I approach our secret hideaway, a little alcove hidden in the rocks beneath her parents’ fishing dock.
The wind is really whipping tonight, making the trek down a challenge.
Her sullen voice sounds as my feet slip and slide on the wet rocks near the shallow opening. “I’m here.”
“Why’d you run away from my party, Jailbait?” I bend at the waist, resting my hands on my knees to catch my breath from the jog over.
Her ocean blue eyes roll up and she sniffs, rubbing the end of her sleeve beneath her dripping nose. A humorless chuckle pushes through her pouty lips, and she shrugs.
“Tired of pretending.”
I exaggerate a gasp as I collapse beside her, nudging an elbow into her ribs. “Thought you’d be happy for me. Getting signed with The Rhett Taylor Band, and at 19, no less, is a huge deal.” And that’s putting it mildly. In recent months, they’ve taken country music by storm. I knew she’d be upset that I’d have to leave, but she must see what an incredible opportunity this is for me.
“Yeah? Well, you thought wrong.” Not only is she not excited—she’s pissed.
I snort, tilting her face up so her eyes meet mine. “That’s a childish thing to say, Li’l Bit.”
Her throat bobs on a hard swallow. “Well, at sixteen, you love to remind me I’m nothing more than a child.” She clears a bit of emotion from her throat and rasps the nickname I coined for her four years ago, “Jailbait.”
“Don’t put words into my mouth, Sam. And never assume where we’re concerned. You’re so much more to me than just a kid, and you know it.”
“Do I?”
I give her a hard look. “You damn well better. Every minute I’ve spent beneath this dock with you, I’ve risked everything. My reputation. My best friend. And a fucking felony charge.”
Teeth clenched, her jaw warbles. “I just…I don’t want you to go.”
Without thought, I kiss away the plump tear that spills from her right eye. “Los Angeles isn’t more than an hour’s drive from here. It’ll be like I never even left.”
She stares up at me, eyes wide with shock. “You…you kissed me.” Sammi brings the fingers of one hand to rest on her cheek.
“I shouldn’t have done that. It was nothing,” I lie, actively denying the tingle I still feel in my lips. The heat coursing through my veins. The aching mass of dread forming in my throat.
“Why do you always do this?” she says with a sob.
“Don’t cry, Li’l Bit.” I scrub a hand over my face. “Not because of me. I can’t bear it.”
“Stop pushing me away.”
The moonlight makes her appear ethereal. She’s so damned beautiful it hurts to look at her. Because I know, no matter how badly I want to run my tongue over every inch of her creamy skin… To taste her lips… To drown in her scent… To give in to the temptation that’s plagued me for far longer than is decent… I can’t. Not yet.
“Only a few more years…”
She pulls her lower lip between her teeth and nods in defeat.
“Hey,” I say, moving to crouch in front of her. “Maybe with me out of the way, you might actually be ready to date a few boys your own age.”
The thought churns in my gut. But it’s something I really want for her. I hate that she’s wasting her high-school years pining away for me. She should be out with her friends, experimenting and experiencing life. And, selfishly, it’d make me feel a hell of a lot less guilty for the girls I hook up with.
“Maybe,” she agrees, shocking me to silence when she doesn’t put up her usual argument. “Okay,” Sammi says, scrubbing her palms over the front of her jeans, “I’ll date… On one condition.”
“Name it.”
“I want you to be my first—”
“Goddamn it, Jailbait! You can’t ask that of me.”
“Kiss,” she amends with a devilish smirk. “My first kiss.” Her hand darts out to cup my cheek, the pad of her thumb gently running back and forth over my days-old stubble.
“You’re playing with fire, Li’l Bit.”
She winks up at me. “Damn sure trying.”
“Come here.” I grip her around the waist and pull her into my lap as I plop down in the wet rocks. It’s the first time I’ve held her. Really held her. I don’t ever want to let this girl go. “I’ll come back for you, you know.” I swoop an errant tuft of long blonde hair behind her shoulder. “You’ll always be my girl.”
“You’ve had plenty of girls, Lyle,” she huffs. “You claim to care about me…to—to want me. Yet, I’m the only one you won’t touch.” Her eyes shine with the pain she no longer tries to conceal. “Do you have any idea what that does to me?”
“But I love you.” The words rush out before I have the chance to overthink them. “Only you.”
Her head jerks back in shock. “You—you do?”
I nod, cupping her chin in my hand. “You’re the only girl I’ve ever had any real feelings for. And if the timing were better—if it wouldn’t land me in jail or six feet under at the hand of your father—I’d have laid claim to you so long ago.”
Her tongue slips out to lick the tears from her lips.
“It’s not our time yet, Li’l Bit… but it will be. Someday in the not-so-distant future when we finally have our moment… Fuck, babe. It’s gonna be explosive.”
“I’m going to explode now, if you don’t kiss me.”
I bury a hand into the back of her hair, pulling her close and pressing my lips to her forehead. Every cell of my body comes alive as I take a moment to breathe her in. It’s like I can actually hear the universe screaming at me to stand up and take notice. She’s the one. The only one.
“Lyle,” she whimpers, grinding into my lap. “I want…”
“Me too.” I cut her off, trailing kisses along her temple and cheek before finally landing on her lips. I rest there for a beat, absorbing her soft mewls and committing to memory the feel of her. The salty taste of her tears. The rapid beat of her heart.
Our breath mingles, and I feel the cosmos exploding. Cheering. Screaming that this is right.
It’s when my tongue darts out and licks the seam of her lips—when hers ever so hesitantly brushes mine—that I force myself to pull away.
“Please don’t go,” my love begs.
“I have to,” I say, backing toward the exit. “Fuck, Jailbait. Now more than ever. I—”
Her head shakes as tears blindly spill from her desolate eyes. “But I love you too.”
Fuck. I bring a hand to my chest. “I’m coming back for you, Li’l Bit.”
Lyle, don’t go!” Her desperate cry hangs in the night air as I stumble back down to the shore.
“Live your life, Sam. Just don’t give away my heart.”
