I leaned over the black granite counter, carefully wiggling my mascara wand through my lashes. In the mirror, Bennett appeared in the doorway. His biceps bulged as he folded his arms, leaning against the doorframe, and I nearly smeared blackest-black all over my eyelid.
“Need something?” I asked.
His lips were folded into a sulky frown, and his eyes were dark as he watched me. In short, he looked about as frustrated as I felt. I liked to think I was hiding it better, even if I was about two seconds away from letting him tear off my bikini.
“You.” Bennett pushed off the doorway and crossed the room, coming to stand in front of me.
My heart tripped and all thoughts vacated my mind. All I knew was that he was close. Too close.
I quickly screwed the cap back on my mascara, setting it aside. My eyes fixed on his throat, watching the pulse jump in the base of his neck. He reached for me, and my breath caught. His fingertips landed on my chin, tilting it up to face him.
“You said you wanted an excursion, so I picked one. Already talked to the front desk. We leave after lunch.” His lips tugged into a delicious smirk that told me I was in trouble. Bennett was a thrill-seeker. Knowing him, we were probably going tequila tasting. Or to play with guns.
“You picked one,” I echoed, not even remotely trusting his judgement.
“Sure did.” He held out the green and yellow brochure, intentionally poking me in the arm with the corner.
My gaze fell, followed by my stomach. No. No way.
I read and re-read the glossy brochure, scouring for alternate activities provided by the Jungle Adventure excursion company. Maybe they offered hiking, boat tours, or something else—anything else. After my third pass, it became clear my searching was in vain. Jungle Adventure offered one activity and one activity only.
With my chin still tilted down, my traitorous eyes lifted a few inches and landed on Bennett’s six-pack, tracing the stacks of solid muscle that clad his torso. Grey board shorts rested low on his hips, highlighting the V chiseled into his sides, drawing my gaze even lower. My breath snagged and something inside me stirred; something I would have called attraction if it was anyone else, but it wasn’t.
Bennett cleared his throat. I lifted my gaze to find him watching me expectantly, his dark blue eyes gleaming mischievously. He just busted me checking him out for the second time this morning. I needed to get some self-control. Or to start wearing sunglasses at all times. The second option was probably a safer bet.
“I don’t even like getting on planes.” My voice echoed through the tiled bathroom, sounding impressively level despite my stomach spinning like a carnival ride. “There is no way I’m going zip-lining. It’s got to be about a thousand times riskier than flying.”
I shoved the colorful pamphlet back at him. He took it from my hands, his mouth tugging in a barely concealed grin, and set it down on the speckled counter behind me.
“It’s perfectly safe,” he said. “About as safe as rock climbing.”
Was that supposed to make me feel better?
“When was the last time you saw me hooked up to a belay?”
“Don’t you want to try something new?”
I shook my head, letting out a little grunt that meant ‘not a chance in hell.’ But we both knew my resolve was already weakening.
“Come on, Thay.” He bumped me with his hip and flashed me his patented, La-Perla-dropping smile in a one-two punch combination meant to knock out my objections.
Saying no was the only sensible course of action, but saying no to that face was nearly impossible, and he knew it. The fact that we were both still woefully under-clothed didn’t help, either. His muscular bare chest was directly at my eye level, and it was more than a little distracting.
“It’s all fun and games until someone drops to their death.”
“Tell you what.” He lowered his voice in a way that made me think all sorts of sordid thoughts. My eyes landed on a white terrycloth robe hanging on the back of the door, and I strongly considered asking him to put it on. “I’ll make you a deal.”
The angel on my shoulder told me not to bite, but the devil on the other shoulder yanked out her pitchfork and pushed the angel off, seizing control of my mouth. “What’s that?”
“If we go zip-lining and you hate it, I’ll let you have the bed to yourself tonight. Hell, I’ll let you have it for the rest of the trip. All three nights.”
Irritation gritted at me, wearing on my threadbare patience like sandpaper. Well played, Bennett. Backing me into a corner where I either had to go zip-lining or admit that I didn’t mind sleeping in the same bed with him. Too bad for him, I did mind it. I minded it very much. Especially the part where I woke up this morning with his warm chest pressed against my back and his top arm draped around my waist.
Okay, I didn’t mind that part at all. And that was the problem. It took considerable willpower to drag myself out of bed this morning, and I hated myself for it. Fortunately, Bennett slept like he was six feet under. He hadn’t even stirred when I slipped out of bed, which meant he was still blissfully ignorant to the fact that he spooned me for some indeterminate length of time.
“Unless you want me to sleep in the bed,” he added, his grin turning suggestive.
“Not even a little,” I lied.
Though, I was confident I would hate zip-lining anyway, so it was a moot point. Nothing about leaping off a perfectly sturdy tree and flying through the air attached to a thin tether sounded appealing. Especially not the part where you could die.
“It’s a win for you either way, then. Either you have fun, or you get rid of me.”
I eyed Bennett suspiciously. “What do you get out of this?” His offer almost seemed like a compromise, except Bennett didn’t compromise—ever—which meant there had to be an ulterior motive involved.
He heaved a sigh and combed through his dark hair with his fingers, turning sheepish. “A distraction? I sure fucking need one.”
I did too, just not in the form of adrenaline-seeking antics. More like, on a therapist’s couch with a box of tissues handy so we could explore why I was attracted to someone I didn’t even like. Make it a double session for good measure. I’d be sure to book that upon my return home.
Worse still, part of me felt strangely guilty at the thought of saying no. Even though Bennett had withheld the details from me, I knew he was facing an immense amount of pressure when it came to work and his mother’s relapse. Moreover, he was shouldering much of it alone. Once in a while, his trademark self-possessed facade faltered, letting me see how much it affected him.
He shifted his weight, and his leather-vanilla cologne drifted my way, further weakening my defenses. I took a step back to distance myself, hitting the granite countertop behind me. My heart tap danced against my ribcage. He had me cornered.
“Fine.” I was desperate to end this half-clothed standoff in the bathroom. It was more dangerous than zip-lining could ever be. “We can go. I hope you enjoy the couch or floor for the rest of the trip. I’ll be sure to spare you a few pillows.”
Because ziplining would be terrible, obviously, and then I’d be forced to evict him from the bed. Admitting I wanted anything to the contrary wasn’t an option.
He winked at me and turned, strolling out of the bathroom. “Don’t worry,” he called over his shoulder. “I plan on having a fantastic night’s sleep in that bed later. Or not sleeping, if you’d prefer. But I’ll be in the bed either way.”
Like a ping pong ball, I’d gone from attraction to sympathy to annoyance in a matter of seconds. I’d never felt so conflicted toward someone in my life.
AS LUCK WOULD HAVE IT, we ran into everyone else having lunch at the tiki bar beside the beach. Before you could say ‘bad idea,’ our excursion had expanded to include the entire bridal party. I was a little surprised Quinn was up for it, but once Adam pounced on the idea, maybe she felt like she had to join.
For the entire thirty-minute shuttle ride, unspoken tension lingered between Quinn and Adam. Adam acted like the douche that he was. Millie kept making eyes at Bennett like I wasn’t even there. Louis kept making eyes at me like Bennett wasn’t even there. And Bennett looked like he wanted to strangle both Adam and Louis with his bare hands.
By the end, I was actually eager to get off the bus. Falling to my death was a more appealing alternative.
Our tour guides quickly ran us through a safety orientation and what to expect. Then they broke us into two groups and directed us to our respective stations to suit up with safety gear, pairing Adam and Quinn with the others, and leaving me and Bennett with Millie and Louis.
“Bennett, can you help me clip this harness?” Millie pouted, batting her lashes at him. “I think it’s stuck.”
Despite our entire relationship’s sham status, it irked me. Fake fiancé or not, he was still mine as far as everyone else was concerned. Louis’s eyes bounced between the three of us in amusement, probably hoping it would spark a fight. Bennett shot an uneasy look in my direction.
“I can help you,” I offered, making a point to sound sickeningly sweet. Everyone knew I was never that nice, which got my point across perfectly. Annoyance flashed across her face, matching the way I felt inside.
Stepping closer, I grabbed hold of the clip on Millie’s harness and fastened it for her quickly. “There.” I patted her shoulder, giving her a fake smile. “I know those things can be tricky for some people.”
Once we were suited up, we held back and let Millie and Louis lead the way along the narrow path to the first platform.
“Still think this was a good idea?” I muttered under my breath.
Bennett stepped closer to me, throwing an arm around my shoulder specifically to annoy me. Or to seduce me. Either way, it was working. “You’re the one who told them where we were going.”
“What did you want me to do, lie?”
“Yes,” he hissed.
Inside his pocket, his phone vibrated. He withdrew his arm, stepping away from me before checking his screen. Ever so slightly, he tilted the phone away from me as we continued to walk along the path. I bristled. Of course. I shouldn’t have been surprised.
He exchanged a few texts with whoever was on the other end, completely ignoring my presence. After several more minutes of walking in silence, my patience ran out. It was a Saturday, and I was pretty sure this wasn’t work-related.
“Really?”
His gaze flicked up to mine, brow creased. “What?”
“Tell me you aren’t texting with another woman right now.”
“I’m not,” he said quietly, his tone taking on a knife edge. There was an unfamiliar hardness behind his eyes. “It’s Holden. He’s been having a hard time.”
Irritation dissolved into guilt. Maybe I shouldn’t have assumed the worst, but could you blame me? Bennett didn’t exactly have a stellar track record with women.
“Oh,” I whispered. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah,” was all he said.
I TRIED TO HATE ZIP-LINING. I wanted to hate zip-lining. And I really, really wanted Bennett to be wrong. Unfortunately, he won—again.
While stepping off the platform for the first time was legitimately terrifying, by mid-descent, I was enjoying the view, and as much as I hated to admit it, having fun. In fact, I wasn’t going to admit it, but Bennett had gone first and was already waiting for me on the other side. He caught me smiling as I sailed to the platform.
He even took a picture for proof.
Sneaky bastard.
Despite that, a blanket of unease hung between us ever since the text incident, following us all the way home on the shuttle. The emotional tug-of-war was starting to take a toll on my sanity. Sometimes he softened toward me, other times he withdrew and acted like he resented the fact that I existed.
And clearly, neither of us trusted each other.
We showered and changed back at the room, engaging in polite, stifled talk only when necessary. By the time we were due to meet everyone for dinner, the formality between us was too much to bear. Between my pale blue maxi-dress and his light blue dress shirt, we had accidentally coordinated our outfits. Outwardly, we looked the part, but we wouldn’t be convincing anyone while acting this way.
I caught hold of his arm before we strolled into the seafood restaurant, bringing us to a stop. “Hey,” I said. “I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have assumed…”
Bennett turned to face me. “It’s fine.” But his face said otherwise because his jaw was wound more tightly than the zip-line earlier.
“I didn’t mean to jump to conclusions.”
He huffed. “I just thought you might realize by now that—”
High heels clicked on the path behind us, and a feminine voice rang out. “Bennett? Oh my God, is that you?”
We both looked to the left to find a pretty blonde in a gauzy, bright orange dress sauntering toward us. Her eyes were glued to Bennett, face lit up like she’d seen a long-lost friend. The two other women she was with lingered by a nearby flowerbed, waiting at a distance.
“Oh, hey…” Bennett forced a smile that looked more like a grimace. I’d never seen him look so uneasy. He was completely off his game. It took me a second to figure out why, but then it hit me head on: he didn’t remember her name. And he’d definitely, definitely slept with her.
I half-wished a coconut would drop out of the tree above us and bonk him on the head.
“Small world, huh?” she cooed. “Can’t believe we ran into each other here.”
“Totally,” he agreed, wrapping an arm around my waist like it would somehow help his predicament.
The girl blinked at him expectantly, waiting for an introduction. For him to say something. For him to do something. Several blinks later, the awkwardness grew to the point where it began to give me second-hand embarrassment.
“I’m Thayer.” I extended my hand to her. “Bennett’s fiancée. Sorry about him, he’s had a little bit too much tequila already.”
Her bright coral lips parted into a smile, and she giggled. “Sounds like he hasn’t changed one bit. I’m Nina.”
Bennett snapped out of his stupor and managed to engage in some small talk, though it was clear he didn’t remember who this woman was. On the one hand, I tried not to judge people for what they did in the bedroom; it’s not like I was a virgin. On the other, I could have written a list of first and last names of everyone I’d been with, along with identifying details like their birthdays, addresses, and parents’ names.
“Oh dear. Would you look at the time?” I said, glancing at my watch. “We have to get inside or they’re going to give away our table. It was so lovely to meet you, Nina.”
With a wave in her direction, I steered Bennett back to the doors of the restaurant while the scaffolding holding up my hopes came crashing down around my feet. Hope I didn’t want to have in the first place. In its wake, all of my doubts multiplied exponentially, branching off to spawn additional doubts of their own.
I’d been beating myself up for being off base with the text, when I wasn’t that off base after all. Not to mention, I had been about one make out session away from letting Bennett get into my Agent Provocateur panties. What the hell was I thinking?
Bennett held the door open for me and followed behind, striding quickly to catch up. “That isn’t—that was a long time ago. Like four years ago.”
“Yup.” I didn’t look at him, coming to a halt at the empty hostess station and waiting for them to return. The restaurant had two rooms, and I couldn’t see the rest of our group.
“Thayer.”
Where was the hostess? This was a four-and-a-half-star resort. The service was supposed to be prompt.
“Look at me.” He grabbed my hand, stepping into my line of sight. I complied, pointedly looking at the pearly button on his shirt at eye level. He didn’t say where to look.
“I know that looks bad,” he said. “But it was a long time ago. I’d just graduated, I was working eighty-hour weeks, and I was partying lots to blow off steam.”
“You don’t have to explain it to me.” It wasn’t like I had a right to be upset about something he did in the past. Or about what he did now, even. This tangled web of lies we’d woven wasn’t real.
Before he could say anything further, the hostess sashayed up and grabbed a stack of menus, greeting us with a smile. Neither of us spoke as she led us to our table in the back, Bennett’s fingers were still interlaced in mine, but it didn’t have the same effect it had before. Now I knew it was just for show—and it had to stay that way, because I wasn’t in the habit of making bad decisions.
Running into Bennett’s past solidified what I already knew: he was a terrible emotional investment, and I wasn’t going to let myself end up like Nina.
