Back at the villa, I find Flick, Stacey, and the boys lounging on the wicker sofas in the private alfresco. The night is balmy. I’ve sweated the alcohol from my system though, so I feel a little more content now. Eager to meet the groom and thank him for the opportunity he’s given me by letting me be a part of his wedding, I meander over to them.
I suddenly freeze when I catch sight of two beautiful girls dressed scantily. They shuffle around, clearing empty beer bottles from the tables and making eyes at the ridiculously attractive gang of Butcher boys.
Great. . .
Bronson twists around and winks at me. ‘Hey, sister Cassidy. Lovely dress. See, Maxipad, she could just about join a convent.’
Max appears unfazed by the comment and my presence in general, which is fine by me because I don’t want to talk to him anyway. I sit down beside Bronson. He’s so welcoming and charismatic, I instantly feel accepted beside him.
‘Wanna drink?’ Stacey asks me, bouncing to her feet and walking over to the fridge.
‘Sit down, Stacey,’ Xander orders. ‘We have serving bitches to do that.’
Bronson gasps in mock horror. ‘Xander! Serving goddesses. Seriously, who taught you manners?’
They all laugh and say, ‘Max.’
‘I don’t mind, Xan,’ Stacey insists.
‘Sit down. Relax,’ Xander says.
Shuffling to the edge of the sofa, I lean across to Clay. ‘Hi. I’m Cassidy. I’m-
‘Our ballerina.’ He nods. He looks a little like Max, but with sharper features and salt and pepper hair in his beard. ‘I know. Aurora hasn’t shut up about you.’
‘Try sticking your dick in her mouth. That usually works,’ Xander says.
Max laughs. ‘That’s what your boyfriend told me he does with you, Xander.’
I’ve entered boy land.
One of the serving girls passes me a beer. ‘Terima kasih,’ I say with a tight smile, trying not to scowl at her beautiful breasts, suddenly conscious of my own small ones.
‘I apologise for my brothers, Cassidy.’ Clay smiles and leans further into his chair. He has a powerful presence. The way my throat tightens warns me to be cautious around him. ‘We’re not heathens. They’re just not always around such beautiful girls.’
‘Now I know that’s not true,’ I say, crossing my legs.
Max stares at Stacey. ‘On the subject of beautiful girls, where are you three fucking off to on Thursday?’
‘Eloquent as always, Max.’ Bronson leans closer to me and mutters, ‘Buck’s party.’
My stomach rolls with unease. Toni’s voice sounds in my mind. You shouldn’t be going.
Stacey pats Flick’s thigh. ‘We’re all staying somewhere else.’
‘Yeah, you are,’ Max states, his gaze shifting to me for a brief moment.
Bronson grins at me a moment before I’m in his arms and being bombed into the pool. The water hits us. My dress floats up and when I surface again, all I can hear is laughter. ‘Oh my gawd! Bronson.’
‘You love it,’ he says, splashing me.
I crack up laughing, my hair dripping down my face. The feelings I’d felt when I’d heard about the buck’s party have mellowed, replaced by his contagious playfulness. ‘You and me and pools are a no no.’
He shrugs. ‘It’s our bit.’
I beam at him. ‘Who decided this?’
‘Ah, you did that day you were the last in the pool.’
The next few hours are buzzing with laughter and playful insults, but at 10:00 p.m. I decide to retire to my room. Stripping out of my damp dress, I step into the garden-style shower and spin the faucet to cold. But even cold water in this sticky humidity is perfectly warm. After washing the chlorine from my hair, I press my hands to the tiles, dip my head under the refreshing water, and think about Max.
He’d completely ignored me tonight. Of course, the exceptions being his many passive-aggressive comments.
Finished in the shower, I step out and let the thick warm air lick me dry. When I crawl into bed and lay down, I remember how Max and I share a wall – the wall behind my head.
As the soft white sheets bunch around my naked body, I grab a pillow and stuff it between my legs. My eyes close as I mount it. Rubbing into it, I imagine Max’s lips on my clit, his erection pulsing inside me as he comes. His taut muscles. His hot breath.
Beginning to moan, I feel a tingle between my thighs. I fist the sheets and pull my body up, rubbing fast against the pillow.
But it’s no use. I’m not getting there.
Frustrated, I give up and rearrange the pillow and sheets. At the sudden sound of the doorknob twisting, I sit up, my cheeks smouldering.
Max walks in and tilts his head. ‘You’re a naughty little girl.’
I frown at him. ‘I’m a silly little girl, remember?’
He grins and that darn dimple mocks me. ‘Cassidy.’
‘No!’ I pull the sheets up. ‘Get out. You’ve been nothing but a jerk to me.’
He closes the door behind him and presses his back to it. ‘I thought you knew I was a jerk?’
‘I’m not playing this game anymore,’ I say, my voice shaking.
‘Little one, you just put on a little auditory show for me.’
‘No.’ I bunch the sheets around me. ‘You can’t do this to me. You humiliate me every time I see you.’ I did just put on a show for him and now I’m angry with him and myself.
He frowns and takes one step forward. ‘How could I humiliate you? No one knows about us.’
‘Bronson does.’ I watch him intently.
He pauses. ‘Yeah.’
‘It’s pretty obvious he’s, like, damage control for you.’
‘Like, is he?’
I tighten my arms around myself and scoot backwards until I hit the headboard. ‘Yes. Why is he so nice to me when you’re such a jerk?’
‘He likes you. And that’s all him.’
‘And you don’t and that’s why you’re a butthead.’
He chuckles and I hate that I love that sound. ‘A butthead?’ he says.
‘Does he know everything about us?’
His gaze bounces around for a moment. ‘Yes.’
I breathe out in rush. ‘What does he think?’
‘He thinks I’m an idiot,’ he says with a shrug.
‘You are!’
He rolls his head is frustration. ‘Yeah, and he also doesn’t think. . . about you. Goddamn it. . . protecting you. Like I do.’
I frown tightly. ‘You’ve upset me, Max. Leaving like that. Talking to me like that.’
‘I know.’ He nods, his gaze lacking its usual arrogance.
‘And you think I’m a silly little girl?’
‘Yes.’ He walks until he’s sitting on the end on my bed. ‘Sometimes you are.’
‘Okay-‘
‘But. . . ‘ He starts to speak and then changes his mind. ‘Sometimes I like it.’
‘You like silly now?’ I say with mock amusement.
‘No. . .’ He exhales loudly and frowns at me contemplatively. ‘I like how you. . . soften. . . my life.’
I take a big breath in and out. ‘I do?’
‘Yeah.’
I sigh, wanting to crawl towards him and hold him close, but I don’t. ‘Is this still just sex?’
‘Yes.’
I laugh once in disbelief. ‘What!?’
‘And . . .’ He reaches for the word. ‘Friendship.’
‘Okay?’ I’m not sure what I’d expected him to say, but I hadn’t been prepared for that blatant answer. I compromise. . . again, and a stone adds to the collection in my belly weighing me down these days. ‘But are you gonna disappear again?’
‘Are you gonna stick your nose into places that might get it broken?’
‘No,’ I say, and I really mean it. ‘Are you gonna-‘
Before I can finish my sentence, he’s pulling me to him. His lips are on mine, and he’s crawling with me until we are laying on the mattress. His hands are everywhere, exploring. I moan, letting my body become mouldable as he nips and licks and gets carried away with my naked figure beneath his fingers.
‘Fuck, Cassidy.’
His clothes come off in a rush. Pressing his hot, heavy, naked body to mine, he rubs up against me, his lips unable to break away from mine.
‘Just be a good girl from now on,’ he groans into my mouth. He’s impatient as he lifts my legs over his shoulders and thrusts into me, pulsing with sharp pumps that send us both over the edge. We struggle for breath between kissing and moaning. It’s not sensual like last time. It’s needy. It’s fast. It’s desperate. He’s pinning me to the mattress, thrusting harder and harder.
He groans again, ‘Fuck, Cassidy.’
His thick erection sinks deeper inside me. All the way to the end before sliding back out again. And then in. As he grips the bedhead with white knuckles, I wriggle in an attempt to adjust to his girth. ‘You’re fucking beautiful.’ Those words make my body soften and relax around his. I slide my hand down his muscular back and onto the cheeks of his perfect flexing arse. I’m hot everywhere. He drops one of my legs as he slides down to lick the tight bud of my nipple. My other leg is still weightless over his shoulder. He growls, ‘Take me.’
The muscles inside me hold his penis like a vice, squeezing with every inward thrust and outward draw. He strokes his hand between my legs, kneading my clit as his stormy grey eyes stare into mine. ‘Come, Cassidy. I need you to.’
I wriggle around and then out of nowhere he flips me onto my belly. Lifting my backside, he spreads my thighs and enters me again in sharp, quick pulses.
‘Fuck,’ he growls, ‘those bathers.’ I fist the sheets as he lifts me by the hips. Hard pumps. So deep.
‘You’re so wet, little one. Such a tight fit but so wet.’ While he moves in and out of me, his fingers collect the slickness of my arousal and paints it across my bum hole. ‘I know what you want.’ Slowly, his thumb inches inside and I bite the pillow. Moaning into the soft fabric, I’m overwhelmed by being so completely taken by him. He’s inside me, in everywhere. A tickle twists at my clit, making me cry out. And a force rushes down to where he opens me wide. And I come hard around his precise thrusts, squeezing his penis and tightening around his thumb.
‘Good girl,’ he says, pulling his thumb out and tilting my body up until my back meets his chest. His tongue is on my neck. His hands move around to my breasts.
He pumps his hips up into me until he starts to tremble. Groaning, his hips thrust with each grunt of his orgasm. ‘Fuck.’
Breathing hard, we collapse onto the bed. He pulls me into his big arms, wrapping them around me as he buries his head into my hair. We stay like this for several minutes, breathing deeply together.
Tears begin to burn the backs of my eyes because I’m feeling so much right now – too much. It’s uncomfortable. The way I want him. The way his presence makes my insides flip around. The way I give myself to him. I begin to shake.
I didn’t seek out these feelings for him. I fell into them.
I’m still falling – hard.
I’m in trouble.
Max brushes the hair from my cheeks and shuffles to study my face. ‘You’re crying.’
I shake my head, eyes squeezed shut. ‘No.’
‘Yes, you are. Did I hurt you?’
‘No, Max.’ I open my eyes and stare through wet lashes. ‘Not yet.’
His brows tighten and he looks sad for a moment. ‘Don’t say that.’
I sniffle. ‘I’m sorry. I am a silly little girl.’
His jaw clenches just briefly. ‘I’m gonna take care of things, okay?’
‘Things?’
He pulls me down beside him and we share a pillow, facing each other. ‘You. I’m gonna take care with you. I’m not gonna hurt you.’
‘You might not mean to.’
‘Try not to expect anything and you’ll be fine.’
My eyes drop as I remember the image of him with the red-headed girl. He doesn’t owe me anything. I know this. He couldn’t have been clearer that day in the pool. Monogamy is worse than polio. . . Despite this, I’m feeling things. Excitement, yes. But also fear. An emptiness in my belly. A kind of tightening in my throat. ‘Easier said than done.’
He brushes his fingers through my hair. ‘You’re gonna be fine.’
‘What do you feel?’ I whisper. ‘Like right now?’
A lazy grin spreads across his cheeks. ‘Which part of me?’
‘I mean inside.’ I roll my eyes.’ After you have sex with me, do you feel anything?’
He keeps playing with my hair, his face relaxed. ‘I feel tired.’
‘Max.’ I blink at him. ‘Because I feel kinda emotional.’
He wipes at a tear beading on my cheek. ‘I can see that.’
‘Do you feel emotional?’
‘I wouldn’t use the word emotional.’
‘Use another word then?’
He laughs once. ‘Well, I’m becoming irritated.’
I can’t help but smile. ‘A different word.’
‘Agitated.‘
‘Max.’
‘Happy, little one.’ He kisses the tip of my nose. ‘I’m happy.’
