Even though I knew it could happen, I can’t believe Dad’s gone.
I didn’t get to say goodbye.
Staring at my reflection in the mirror, I don’t take in the black dress Liam got for me. My sight blurs, my throat constricting while I try to remember our last conversation.
I’m sure I told him I loved him.
Closing my burning eyes, I swallow the tears down.
Daddy, I’m sorry.
What Finn couldn’t do, Dad’s death did. I feel broken as if my heart is nothing but shards. I tried so hard to not upset Dad, and then the news of the attack made his heart give out.
Guilt rears up, swirling into a ball of darkness inside me as it mixes with the grief.
I hear movement behind me, and opening my eyes, I suck in a fortifying breath. Today’s going to be difficult.
I turn around as Liam stops behind me, and looking up at the man that’s kept me from falling apart the past week, I don’t know what I would’ve done without him.
First, the attack. Then, Dad died.
I can’t handle anything else. It’s all too much.
Taking a step forward, I wrap my arms around Liam’s waist and rest my head against his chest. I feel the bulge of his gun behind his back, and it serves as a reminder of who he really is.
He holds me until I pull back. I suck in a quivering breath, feeling smaller than a speck of dust.
“Ready?” Liam asks, his tone gentle as always. I’ve started picking up on the fact that he only talks to me like this. There’s a dangerous edge to his tone whenever he’s speaking to another person.
He treats me as if I’m precious.
Nodding, I take hold of Liam’s hand, following him out of the penthouse.
The drive to the church fills my stomach with burning coals. I keep glancing at Liam, the power he holds becoming more evident every day.
The church comes into view, and the hollow bitterness of death fills me.
I’m not ready.
After Liam parks the car and we get out, Mom comes walking toward me, Rowan hovering behind her. Silently we hug before we walk into the church.
Mom didn’t have much of a relationship with Dad. They haven’t even seen each other since I turned sixteen, so at least I don’t have to worry about how she’s handling this. But she’s still worried that I’m staying at Liam’s place.
Entering the church, I’m surprised to see the pews filled with people I’ve never met.
The mafia.
My eyes lock on the casket upfront. There’s a beautiful photo of Dad that’s been enlarged. It’s one of the rare ones where he’s smiling. My eyes mist as Mom takes a seat in the front row.
I suck in a trembling breath as I stop by the casket. Closing my eyes, it takes all the strength I have to keep the tears back. Slowly, I lift my lashes, then look down.
The sight of Dad’s body, cold and lifeless, crushes my heart to dust.
Daddy.
Unable to stop it, my body shakes as sobs burst from me.
I’m going to miss you so much. I’m so sorry I didn’t listen to you, and I took the job at Byrne Enterprises. If I had done as you asked, you’d still be here.
God, I’m sorry.
Leaning forward, I press a kiss to Dad’s cold skin.
“Please forgive me,” I whisper.
When I turn around, Liam’s right behind me. His eyes are filled with compassion and worry as he takes hold of my arm, leading me to where Mom’s sitting.
My eyes lock on Dad’s photo, and when the priest starts the service, I don’t take in a single word.
I snap out of the trance I slipped into when Liam gets up to say a couple of words. He walks to the front and takes a moment to look at the photo of Dad, then he chuckles and says, “I can hear him cursing us all for sitting here, telling us to get back to work.”
There’s a murmur of chuckles throughout the church, then Liam glances over all the people. “Jimmy was family. Jesus, he raised half of you.”
Murmurs of agreement spread out behind me.
Liam looks at the photo again. “I’ve never been good with words, so I’m going to steal for you, Jimmy. The words of Clare Harner.” He clears his throat, then recites, “Do not stand by my grave and weep. I am not there. I do not sleep. I am the thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints in snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain.” Liam pauses to take a breath, then turns his eyes to me. “Do not stand by my grave and cry. I am not there. I did not die.” He pauses for a moment, just looking at me. “Jimmy left a piece of himself behind for us.” He looks at Dad’s photo again. “We’ll take care of her for you, old man. It’s time for you to rest.”
Liam gestures for me to come.
Taking a deep breath, I get up and walk to the front. When Liam gives me a hug, I whisper, “Thank you. That was beautiful.”
I wait for him to sit down, then glance over all the faces.
So many men called Dad family.
“You probably knew my dad better than me.” I swallow hard. “I only saw him when he took a break from work. But the times I got to spend with him are some of my favorite memories.” I have to take a moment to get air into my lungs. “I’d give anything to hear him call me lass one last time.” I turn my gaze to the photo and have to breathe through the wave of grief his smiling face brings. “It was an honor to be your daughter. I love you. Always will.”
After the service, Liam drove us to a warehouse.
A long table’s been set up on the side with snacks. There’s also coffee and tea. Not that I can force myself to have any.
I keep looking at all the men. Some seem normal, but others are downright scary.
Liam keeps his hand on my lower back, and when he starts steering me through the group of men, I instinctively inch closer to him.
A man glances at me, then turns and heads our way. He has a scar across his cheek, and every step he takes makes it look like he’s prowling for a victim.
I’m practically glued against Liam by the time the man stops in front of us, then he looks at Liam with respect. “Boss.”
Liam glances down at me. “This is Declan. He’ll guard you.”
“What?” the word burst from me.
I knew I was getting guards, but…
My eyes fly back to Declan’s face.
God, he looks scary.
Three more men come to join us. Liam gestures to each of them. “Waylon, Ezra, and Ryan. They’re Declan’s team.”
With wide eyes, I stare at the four men who will follow me around like shadows.
Declan tilts his head, his features softening a little but not enough to make him look any less threatening. “Sorry for your loss. Jimmy saved my arse. He was like a da to me.”
Hearing his Irish accent and how close he was to Dad eases some of the tension in me.
Then he adds, “Don’t worry. I’ll keep you safe.”
“Thank you,” I manage to whisper.
Declan turns his attention to Liam, who says, “I have to be back at work first thing tomorrow morning. Be at the penthouse at five am.”
“Aye, boss.” Declan nods, then turns and walks away, the other three guards following him.
“I know he’s intimidating, but he’s one of my best,” Liam murmurs.
I glance up at him. “I’m not going to lie, he looks scary.”
“You’ll be safe with Declan. I trust him.”
My eyes search Liam’s eyes. If he trusts Declan… God, I’ll just have to take his word for it. He hasn’t given me any reason to doubt him. “Okay.”
Slowly the men take turns to pay their respect to me. It’s clear all of them are loyal to Liam.
Just like Dad was.
My gaze rests on the man who’s quickly becoming a huge part of my life. I got to know him as a CEO, but I’m seeing a different side to him surrounded by the mafia.
The powerful side.
Liam’s eyes meet mine. “Something wrong?”
With our gazes locked, I ask, “So this is who you are?”
He nods. “You okay with it?”
Just like when I found out who Dad was and what he did for a living, I realize it doesn’t really matter. It didn’t change my love for Dad.
And it won’t stop me from falling for Liam.
“Yeah, I’m okay with it.”
The corner of his mouth lifts, and wrapping an arm around my shoulders, he tugs me to his side and presses a kiss to the top of my head. “Good.”
