“GIRLS, we are so going to the bar! Logan’s, watch out, here we come!” Rita starts clapping, her red nails flashing every time her hands fly through the air.
Cheyenne yells out an extra loud whoop, making me jump. “Yes, girl, YES. I am so sick of sitting in the library studying every night.”
Please. They don’t sit in the library every night. Every time I’m in there, I never see them, but the building is large and multi-leveled, so maybe they are?
Huh. Doubtful.
“Let’s go find some men tonight,” Cheyenne finishes with a big grin.
“Stat!” Rita adds because she’s been on a Grey’s Anatomy kick and likes to talk as if she works at a hospital every chance she gets.
I watch them with trepidation in my chest, wondering how I can get out of this. Don’t get me wrong, I like Rita and Cheyenne, but they are so high energy while I’m…
Not.
I leave that sort of behavior to my sister Ruby. She’s full of it. Loud and obvious and wanting all the attention, all the time. She would adore Rita and Cheyenne. They’d become fast friends. Maybe I should call her.
“Blair!” I nearly jump out of my chair when Cheyenne screams in my face. “You’re going with us, right?”
My gaze goes to Cheyenne, then to Rita, and back to Cheyenne. I can tell from the looks on their faces, they won’t take no for an answer.
But I gotta try anyway.
“I don’t know…” I let my voice trail off, grimacing slightly. “I have a test tomorrow.”
“Oh, please.” Rita rolls her eyes, reaching for me. “You’ll have to take a bazillion tests. That first one of the semester doesn’t count.”
I back away from her grabby red claws. “It definitely counts.”
“Come on, Blair. Please?” Cheyenne puts her hands together like she’s begging. Praying. With those big blue eyes and the subtle lash extensions that she’s currently batting at me, she’s hard to resist. “It’ll be so much fun.”
“Plus, maybe you can introduce us to your brother’s teammates.” Rita and Cheyenne share a look. “They’re always at Logan’s.”
My heart sinks. They’re using me to get closer to the guys. Not because they want to hang out with me and get to know me better.
Ouch.
“I don’t really talk to them,” I start, but Rita cuts me off.
“Please. Girl, you talk to them all the time. Knox Maguire is your brother. We want the connection. I’ve been dying to meet that dude since freshman year, but he doesn’t pay any attention to me.”
“Maybe if you let him feel you up in a bathroom at a frat party he might notice you,” Cheyenne jokes, making me wince.
I don’t want to think about my brother feeling anyone up in any sort of bathroom, eww.
“God, Chey! I let one frat boy feel me up in his bathroom and I never hear the end of it!” Rita goes stomping off, leaving Cheyenne and me alone in our tiny living room.
Cheyenne shrugs, her eyes a little wild. “I didn’t mean to make her mad.”
Before I can tell her not to worry about it, Cheyenne is bolting down the hallway, banging on Rita’s closed bedroom door. “Come on, Rita! Let me in! I was just kidding!”
I scoot past her and continue down the hall, locking myself in my room and collapsing on my double bed with a loud sigh. Thank God I have my own bedroom, so I can lock myself away from the chaos that is my roommates.
They love each other fiercely, but they’re like sisters, which means they fight fiercely too. And witnessing their chaotic relationship makes me miss my sister.
Grabbing my phone, I FaceTime Ruby. She picks up on the second ring, though her face doesn’t appear. I can tell she’s in her dorm room. I see movement in the background and I assume it’s her roommate, Becca.
“What are you doing?” I ask, frowning when I hear something crash.
Ruby’s head pops up, a big smile on her face. My sister is gorgeous. Her sparkling personality makes her even more appealing. Guys have been chasing her since she was twelve.
Twelve.
She’s never interested in any of them. Not really. She’s dated guys, here and there, but it never turns into anything, which always makes our dad happy. He thinks we’re all too young to settle down—well, us girls at least.
Doesn’t matter that he got with Mom when she was only eighteen and they’re still blissfully happy, but whatever.
“Sorry, I just dropped my pencil box and it spilled everywhere,” Ruby says.
Ruby likes to draw. She’s always sketching something, though she insists it’s just a hobby and she can’t make a business out of it. I beg to differ, but she doesn’t listen to me ever. I’m just her big sister, always trying to tell her what to do, according to her.
“How’s it going?” I smile at her, watching as she settles into her desk chair, brushing the wild blonde strands away from her face.
“Good! Busy.” She glances over her shoulder, waving at her roommate before she turns to face the camera once more. “I hate it here.”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“I’m bored. Campus life is dead. I thought it would have more of a nightlife but nope. The sidewalks roll up at nine and there’s nothing going on, ever. Plus,” she leans her head closer to her phone, “I don’t like my roommate.”
“Ruby!” I press my lips together, hating how loud I just was. I’m reminding myself of my roommates. “Isn’t she right there?”
“She already left. And it doesn’t really matter. I don’t think she likes me either.” Ruby leans back, exhaling loudly. “I didn’t think it would feel so good, confessing that. It’s like a weight just lifted off my shoulders.”
I shake my head. “Is it really that bad there?”
“Worse than you can imagine. At least for me. You know how I am. But enough about me. I always make it about me.”
This is not a lie. Ruby used to be one of the most self-centered people I knew, though that might have something to do with the fact that she’s my little sister and was always in my business, in my stuff, in my face, all the damn time when we were younger. But at her core, she cares about others. Her circle is small, just like mine. Just like Knox’s.
I prefer a smaller group of friends. People I adore and trust. People who don’t care that once upon a time, our dad was famous. My brother and sister feel the same way.
“What are you up to? How’s school? How are your roommates? Met any cute guys yet?” Ruby asks.
“Nothing much, school is going well, my roommates are okay, and no, I haven’t met any cute guys yet.” Cam doesn’t count. I’ve known him for a while, so I can’t put him in the ‘just met’ category.
“Why aren’t you hanging out with Knox and all his friends?”
I roll my eyes. “Because the majority of them are ridiculous. And Knox doesn’t want me hanging around them. He’s afraid I might run off and hook up with one of them, as if I have no control over myself.”
“Like Cam?”
Her question hangs heavy in the air, and as always, I regret that I ever told her I was interested in him.
“That was years ago. I’m over him,” I say, but I sound unconvincing even to myself.
“Liar.” Ruby laughs when I give her the finger. “It’s okay that you still have a crush on him, Blair.”
“Not when he doesn’t notice me.” I think about what he said earlier, and what I told him. I then spill my guts to my little sister, giving her an entire replay of the encounter that I had with Cam at the library.
“So, he actually said he’s thought about having sex with you?” Ruby sounds scandalized.
“And then I basically admitted the same thing.” I pause, all my insecurities rushing through me. “Was that a mistake?”
“No, not at all. I’m proud of you. How long have you been lusting after this guy again? And you only just now put it out there?”
“Stop. It’s not easy for me to say stuff like that.” I’m embarrassed. I feel like a child with a crush on some unattainable teen idol or something. Which is fairly accurate when it comes to my relationship with Cam. He feels completely out of reach. He always has.
“I’m not trying to make you feel bad. I’m trying to lift you up. It’s been a long time that you’ve felt this way about Camden Fields. I feel like you’re finally making progress.”
“Nothing happened, Ruby. You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”
“We all have to start somewhere, and this is your start with Cam. When do you think you’ll see him again?”
“I don’t know.” I think about the roomies going to Logan’s. “There’s a chance I could run into him tonight if I go out with the girls.”
“For all you know, you might still be on his mind. Right now is the perfect time to go out and hopefully run into him.”
“I feel like Rita and Cheyenne only want to drag me along with them because of my connection to Knox.” And I don’t like feeling used. It’s not fun. Not at all.
“So? Use that to your advantage to get closer to Cam,” Ruby points out.
“Right, only for Knox to ruin it because he’s so overprotective that he’ll drive Cam away forever.” I sound morose. I am morose. Our brother has this way of ruining everything when it comes to guys.
Poor Knox. I know he means well, but he’s too much sometimes.
Okay fine, most of the time.
“Ugh, forget him. He can say whatever he wants, but ultimately, he doesn’t control our lives, right? I say go for it. Let Cam know you’re interested.”
“But that’s so…” Scary. Intimidating. Terrifying.
All the above.
“It’s what you need to do,” Ruby says firmly. “How else will Cam know you’re interested, if you don’t tell him?”
I wish I had even an ounce of Ruby’s confidence.
“Maybe he isn’t interested. Maybe he just said that for…whatever reason. I don’t know what to think. But it’s hard for me to put myself out there like that. I mean, he’s the freaking college quarterback, and he’s gorgeous. Everyone knows who he is. He could have whomever he wants, and I’m just—”
“You’re Blair fucking Maguire, that’s who you are. Have you taken a good look at yourself lately? You’re smart, you’re kind, you’re gorgeous. Cam would be an idiot not to be interested in you.”
We may have fought like cats and dogs when we were younger, but Ruby is the best hype woman ever. “I wish you were here right now.”
“Me too. I’d make you talk to him tonight. I’d probably make you text him right now, if I was with you. In fact, you should totally do that.”
“I don’t even have his number,” I mutter.
“One text to our brother and you’d have it.”
“Along with a ton of questions I don’t want to answer.”
“True that.” Ruby’s smile is soft and encouraging. “Just go out with your wild roommates to that bar and see what happens. You might run into him.”
“And then again, I probably won’t. Or he’ll be there surrounded by a ton of gorgeous girls and he won’t even notice me.”
“Please. How could he not notice you?”
After I get off the call with Ruby, I venture out of my bedroom to find Rita and Cheyenne in Rita’s bedroom, Cheyenne lounging on the bed on her phone, while Rita searches through her closet. I stand in the open doorway, take a deep breath and announce, “I’ll go out with you tonight.”
Rita whirls around, a giant smile on her face. “You will? That’s great!”
“But I have one condition.”
“What is it?” Cheyenne asks.
“I’d love to introduce you to my brother.” Not really. That sounds like torture. But I have to say this. “But I can’t guarantee it’s going to happen. Or that he’ll even be there.”
“He goes to Logan’s a lot,” Rita says with complete confidence. “And hey, I get it if you can’t help us meet Knox. He’s a popular guy.”
“Right.” Was that an insult? “Let’s just go to Logan’s and have fun, and if we run into Knox and his friends, well, lucky us, right?”
“Lucky us!” Rita does a little shimmy, waving her hands above her head. “We need to pre-party first. I refuse to spend too much money on alcohol.”
“Perfect. I’ll go make us some shots.” Cheyenne is off the bed and out of the room in seconds.
“Hey, Blair,” Rita calls when I’m about to turn and head back to my bedroom.
I glance over my shoulder. “Yeah?”
“Thanks. I know sometimes we can be…a lot. And you probably think we’re just using you for your connection to the football team, but I swear we’re not. We like you.” Rita smiles and I smile in return. “You’re a true homie though, going out with us tonight.”
“Thanks for including me,” I tell her before I go to my bedroom, shutting the door behind me and leaning against it.
I want to believe Rita, but there’s a tiny part of me that makes me think she is just using me to get closer to Knox. It’s happened before. Actually, it used to happen all the time when we were in high school. That’s the main reason I like keeping my friend circle small.
Hopefully, my instincts are wrong.
