Lucas had to see everything available in every party-supplies department in every store that Elena, Allison, and Elena’s parents visited. He wanted square plates, not round plates or divided plates, and he wanted the hard plastic ones instead of the Styrofoam ones, because the former felt better when he squeezed them between his small fingers. He wanted napkins with dinosaurs on them and tablecloths that matched, but at least one of the dinosaurs shown had to be a T. rex. He wanted streamers and party horns, but the horns had to make the right sound, which meant testing a few sample horns to the annoyance of other shoppers.
He wanted a bounce house, despite Elena claiming they had no room for one, which meant their house could no longer be his party venue. He decided they would have to have the party in a park or some other open space large enough for a small bounce house. Nora was on her phone within seconds making arrangements.
Lucas wanted a dinosaur piñata, but three different stores had three different dinosaur piñatas, which meant three piñatas at Lucas’s party, because although Elena said, “No, dear, three is too many,” Nora responded with a resounding “Of course, darling. One can never have too many piñatas.” Apparently, Gram’s approval trumped Momma’s disapproval.
He wanted balloons as well, tons of them, but not just any balloons.
“Green balloons, Momma,” he said as he bounced on Elena’s hip and pointed at all the different greens available. He had been alternating between walking on his own while holding someone’s hand, and throwing his arms up so that he could be toted around on someone’s hip. He had just rotated back around to Elena’s hip after she scolded him for his daring attempt to climb on top of Allison’s shoulders with the speed of a baby cheetah, a move which took Allison completely by surprise.
“This green?” Elena asked, pointing to the nearest one. It was a vivid green, a grass green as Allison put it.
“Reminds me of the park,” Allison said, and Elena smiled, remembering the day her son barreled over Allison in Central Park.
“It does me as well,” she said, bumping Allison with her side.
“No.” Lucas shook his head with certainty. “Too green.”
“Too green?” Allison gasped. “There’s no such thing, kid.”
Lucas stuck his tongue out at her as he continued shaking his head. “Too green.” He giggled around the words.
“Perhaps a nice chartreuse, dear?” Nora asked, pointing to one of the balloons that was a much yellower green.
“Too yellow.” Lucas shook his head while Allison nodded in agreement.
“What about this one, munchkin?” Elena pointed to a teal balloon. “This is lovely.”
Lucas sighed dramatically. “Too blue.”
“It really is.” Allison said.
“It is,” Nora said as well.
“Excuse me, chartreuse,” Elena teased, rolling her eyes at her mother. It wasn’t as if her mother’s choice had been any more successful.
“Mi nieto quiere verde, mija.” Lucas Sr. grinned as he came around to poke Elena’s side, before patting her back.
Elena rubbed her temple and sighed. “Tu nieto está siendo difícil.”
Allison cleared her throat and stepped a little closer to Elena. “So, I know that ‘nieto’ is grandson,” she whispered, and Elena turned to her, surprised. “And ‘verde’ is green, so I think I got what your dad said, but can I ask what you said? Something about Lucas…”
Allison’s pronunciation was a little bland and slightly off, but Elena’s heart swelled all the same. “Being difficult,” she said. She squeezed Allison’s hand. “I thought you didn’t speak any Spanish.”
Allison shrugged and scratched awkwardly at the back of her neck. “Yeah, well, I don’t, but I told you I wanted to learn.”
“Yes, and I agreed to teach you.”
Allison nodded. “I just wanted to know a little before we started so that I wouldn’t sound like a total dork. So, I’ve just been reading on the Internet some.”
“Skilled guitarist,” Lucas Sr. said before his daughter could speak a word. “And now learning Spanish for my Elena?”
Allison blushed as the man stepped around Elena in the store aisle to place a hand on Allison’s shoulder. “Dear, if you haven’t yet won my daughter’s heart, you have certainly won mine.”
“Winning over my grandson, my daughter, and now my husband.” Nora winked at Allison. “You are quite the charmer, Miss Sawyer.”
Allison chuckled, still red-faced. “Uh, I think you’re forgetting someone.”
“Oh, am I?” Nora asked.
“Yeah,” Allison told her. “Don’t you remember when I won you over? I charmed you with all my confidence and Elena Vega adoration.”
“I believe I can clearly recall that as well, Mother,” Elena said, positively giddy that Allison was joking around with her mother of all people and gaining her father’s approval as well.
Despite the vast differences in social status and lifestyle, Allison seemed to fit so easily into the family; and watching that fluid integration happen right before her eyes was a privilege Elena cherished deeply. It felt simultaneously like a rush of adrenaline and a soothing bath—both thrilling and comforting, and beautiful in its simplicity and delicacy.
Pure and easy and beautiful—that was it. That was she and Allison since the beginning. In fact, Elena found it breathtaking just how easy it had actually been and continued to be with Allison. Even when it should have been hard, it was easy. They connected instantly, even if there had been a bit of awkwardness throughout. The transition from strangers to friends had been fast and fluid, which was rare for Elena. The transition then from friends to confidants had been faster and even easier, and the transition from confidants to lovers had felt like the most natural progression in the world.
“Mhm. I distinctly remember charming you, Nora. It definitely happened.”
“I believe I remember you mentioning something about how charming ‘that Sawyer girl’ was as well, dear,” Lucas Sr. said, and Nora offered him a playful glare.
“Oh, see there,” Allison said, nudging Nora with her elbow. “You can’t deny it any longer. May as well ‘fess up.”
“Never,” Nora replied, making them all laugh. She then surprised Allison by nudging her back and whispering, “Quite charmed, my dear.”
Allison smiled. “Same.”
Elena cleared her throat, bringing the attention back to her. “Does no one here find me charming?” She looked over at her mother. “Are you going to throw me out and adopt Allison instead, Mother?”
“Of course not, darling,” Nora told her. “How would I ever see my precious grandson?”
“Oh ha ha.” Elena bounced Lucas and squeezed his hand. “You hear that, baby? Gram only keeps me around because of you.”
Lucas completely ignored her, still staring up at the selection of balloons, his mouth hanging open.
Stepping over, Allison kissed Elena’s temple. “Well, I think you’re charming.”
Elena leaned into her touch when Allison wrapped an arm around her, her hand coming up to rest on Lucas’s warm back.
“This feels good,” Allison whispered against Elena’s ear. “All of us together, like a family.”
The sincerity in Allison’s voice made Elena’s chest ache in the best way. “I—”
“Miss Vega?”
Elena startled, turning to face the end of the aisle. Her blood ran cold as she saw Elliot standing there, watching her.
“Elliot.” She tried to offer him a courteous smile, but she knew it likely looked as tight and forced as it felt. “How are you?”
Elliot didn’t answer her as his sharp gaze narrowed and flicked back and forth between her and Allison, zeroing in on Allison’s arm where it was still wrapped around her body. One thick eyebrow rose as his gaze tracked the length of Allison’s body, obviously taking in her attire, and Elena didn’t miss the subtle way the man shook his head in disapproval.
“Family outing?” Elliot asked, eyes locking onto Elena’s.
Elena felt her anger begin to boil beneath the surface. She could see the calculating glint in Elliot’s eyes, the near-glee at gaining more dirt to spread around her own office about her. She had never had much patience for people like him.
“Yes, actually,” she replied, and, had it been anyone else, she might have actually moved to introduce everyone, but this was Elliot. She knew the man did not care beyond gaining more gossip material, which meant he was only interested in one of Elena’s companions—Allison.
“I see,” he said, smirking. He then pointed to Allison. “And who’s this?”
Elena sucked in a sharp breath through her nose. Her jaw remained rigid as she grit her teeth before straightening her back, readjusting Lucas on her hip, and moving closer to Allison. “This is Allison,” she said, hesitating only a moment before adding, “my partner.”
She felt Allison stiffen beside her, and Elena bit the inside of her cheek. She hoped the term wasn’t too much too soon.
“Partner.” Elliot’s eyes flicked back and forth between them again. His gaze scanned down Allison once more, and then Elena nearly burst into flame as the man snickered softly.
Her stomach lurched and then bottomed out when she felt Allison practically concave beside her. She saw her shoulders slump out of the corner of her eye, deflating. Elena wanted to scream, mentally damning Elliot to all kinds of hell.
“Well,” Elliot said. “I won’t hold you up.” He nodded at Elena. “Miss Vega.”
He disappeared around the end of the aisle.
Silence flooded the aisle for several long moments before Nora smacked her lips and drawled, “Well, he was quite the delight.”
Elena’s jaw hurt from clenching her teeth. She placed a hand on Allison’s arm but it was gently shrugged off as Allison took a shaky breath and quickly walked off.
“Allison, wait!” Elena quickly passed Lucas off to her mother before chasing after her.
She caught Allison a few aisles over. “Allison, please don’t go.” She grabbed her hands.
Allison avoided her eyes. “I wasn’t going to leave,” she said. “I just needed a minute.”
Elena’s eyes stung when before she could get a word out, Allison looked up at her and whispered, “It’s always going to be like this, isn’t it?”
“I’m so sorry,” Elena whispered.
“So am I.” Allison sighed. “People are always going to think you’re crazy for being with me. I mean, you saw the way he looked at me. You look like you just stepped out of a magazine. I mean, your clothes and your jewelry…everything about you screams money, but I look like I just walked out of the thrift shop, and that’s never bothered me. Not once in my life has that ever bothered me, but it did just now.” A quiet strangled sob escaped her, and she wiped hard at her eyes. “He laughed at the idea of us together, Elena. He laughed!”
Elena’s throat burned, and no matter how many times she swallowed, she never found any relief. Her chest felt tight. Her eyes welled with tears as she let go of Allison’s hands and cupped her cheeks instead. “I don’t care what he thinks,” she said. “That man is not worth your emotions or even a second thought. That was not about you. It was about me. I told you the man despises me.”
“But it’s not just him,” Allison argued, pulling Elena’s hands from her face. “Those people at your office looked at me the same way. People are always going to look at us like that, because you’re, you know, you, and I’m—”
“You are every bit as good as me.” Elena latched onto her again. “Look at me, Allison.”
Allison struggled against her hands for a second before sighing and relenting.
“You are every bit as good as me,” Elena repeated when Allison looked into her eyes. “Every bit, and please don’t ever let anyone make you feel otherwise.” She wiped at the tears escaping Allison’s glossy green eyes. “I don’t give a damn what he or anyone thinks. Do you hear me?”
Allison huffed and leaned into Elena’s palm, her hands coming up to gently grip her wrists. “Yeah, I hear you.”
A smile slowly stretched Elena’s lips. “I am so proud to be with you, Allison,” she said. “So proud.”
“Really?”
Elena nodded and kissed her lips. “Really.”
* * *
When Allison and Elena reentered the balloon aisle, Nora wrapped an arm around Allison’s back and squeezed her. “I believe Lucas has made a decision,” she said, and Allison appreciated that she didn’t bring up what happened with Elliot.
“Oh yeah?” Allison asked, leaning into Nora’s embrace as Lucas dove from his grandmother’s hip to Allison’s. “Which one, buddy?”
“That one!”
Everyone followed his finger, and Allison burst into laughter upon seeing it while Elena merely sighed and shook her head. It wasn’t a green balloon at all. It was a white balloon with a green dinosaur on it.
“Son, that balloon is not even green,” Elena said.
“Uh-huh! I want it.”
“Kid, I showed you that same green a minute ago and you said it was too dark,” Allison said.
“But this green is a dinosaur!” Because apparently that made all the difference in the world. “I want it!”
“Very well, Lucas.” Elena looked to her mother. “We should thank Vivian for beginning this obsession of Lucas’s.”
“Eh,” Allison said, shrugging. “The kid loves dinosaurs. Don’t most little boys?”
“Alson likes dinosaurs too,” Lucas sang, a large smile spreading over his lips.
“Yeah I do.” Allison high-fived him. “We play dinosaurs together a lot, don’t we buddy?”
“Yup!”
“Were you one of those young girls who preferred G.I. Joe’s to Barbies, dear?” Nora gave a small laugh. “Elena loved her Barbies.”
“I didn’t really get into either,” Allison said. “I didn’t have toys when I was a kid.”
“None?” Lucas Sr. asked. “Were your parents strict?”
Nora nudged him with her elbow, hard, and Allison chuckled as the elder woman pinned her husband with a glare. Face purpling, he cleared his throat.
“My apologies, Allison,” he offered, and Allison shook her head to dismiss the apology.
“Don’t worry about it. It’s not something you guys have to tiptoe around, you know. People always seem to do that, and maybe it’s just because I don’t really talk about my time in the system, but you don’t have to. If you want to know things, just ask me. I’ll tell you.”
“You don’t have to do that,” Elena whispered, reaching over to squeeze Allison’s hand that was wrapped around Lucas’s leg.
“It’s okay,” Allison said, shrugging and giving Lucas a small bounce. She took a deep breath and let it out in a soft sigh. “Anyway, there’s not a ton to tell. Like I said, I didn’t have toys. I never really had anything of my own. I remember a few stuffed animals but that’s it. The few group homes I spent some time in had toy chests, but most of the toys were broken. And I rotated families pretty often, so I never got much there either.”
Everything in the aisle drew her eye as she spoke, unable to really hold anyone’s gaze. Her throat felt too tight to speak but she labored through it. She wanted to share with these people, even the parts that were hard to talk about and even harder to recall.
“I had nine different families just by the time I was sixteen. They never felt like families to me, though. Family is supposed to be permanent, and they were all so temporary. No one ever kept me for long, because either they ended up having a baby of their own or I was too much of a troublemaker or the house was just overcrowded.” She swiped a hand down her face, lingering for a moment under her left eye. “So, yeah, anyway, I never really had any toys or a family, for that matter. I guess I was never very good at finding one.”
Nora’s fingers pressed tightly against Allison’s shoulder as she was pulled even closer to the woman. “You have found one now, dear.”
Eyes glossy but alight with affection, Elena stepped closer and wrapped her arm around Allison from the other side, Lucas tucked snugly between them. Her voice was slightly choked as she said, “You have.”
“Absolutely,” Lucas Sr. said with a firm nod.
Allison closed her eyes a moment and let those words sink in so deep that she knew they would always remain. Her breath released in a staggered sigh before she whispered, “Thank you.”
“Of course,” Nora said, giving Allison one last squeeze before stepping away and clapping her hands together. “Now, how about we place an order for some balloons? We are going to need more than what is available here.”
“Yes,” Elena said, clearing her throat and sniffling. “Could you and Daddy take care of that with the clerk, please?”
Nora nodded before she and her husband took off for the front of the store. Once they were out of sight, Elena slipped her hand into Allison’s and smirked. “So, tell me, what else have you learned in Spanish?”
“Uh, a few things. Mostly simple stuff like colors and some items and then, like, family terms. But there is one sentence I learned that I want to say to you.”
“Oh? And what is that, dear?”
Allison ducked her head. “I, uh, maybe now isn’t the best time or place.”
Smile widening, Elena’s tone turned lascivious. “Well, well, Miss Sawyer.”
Allison nudged her shoulder. “It’s not like that.”
“That’s a shame.” Elena clucked her tongue.
They stepped around the corner and into the next aisle. “Momma, I need these!” Lucas pointed to a package of green invitations.
Allison laughed. “Yeah, Elena, surely all the toddlers coming to the party would love some invitations that none of them can read.”
“I can read!” Lucas crossed his arms over his chest.
“Yes, dear, you have already learned to read many things.” Elena pointed to a word on one of the packages. “Tell Allison what this says.”
Lucas eagerly leaned forward so that Allison had to tighten her arm around him to keep him attached to her hip. “Um,” he said, scrunching his face up as he stared at the word.
“Sound it out, munchkin.”
“Ha—Hhhha…p…Happy!” He clapped his hands and turned wide eyes to his mother. “Is it happy, Momma?”
“It is! Well done, Lucas!”
He beamed at her before sticking his tongue out at Allison. “See?” Allison grinned despite Elena telling Lucas that it wasn’t nice to boast.
“I see, buddy,” Allison said. “Good job!”
Lucas leaned his head over and rested his forehead against Allison’s, one of his hands curling into her bun. “Alson, am I heavy?” He stared into her eyes from less than an inch away, pressing his face against hers.
Allison kissed the tip of his nose and shook her head against his. “Not at all.”
“But I’m a big boy.”
Allison and Elena both glanced to one another, sharing a smile that somehow felt intimate. “Yes, you are,” Allison agreed.
“So why I’m not heavy?”
“Why am I not, Lucas,” Elena said.
“Right,” he said. He then looked back to Allison, waiting for her answer.
“Um,” Allison muttered, contemplating what to say. She didn’t want to call the boy scrawny or skinny, because he might not like that. She patted a hand over his chest. “Because you’re a big boy in here, and big hearts aren’t heavy.”
“Why?”
“Because they’re full of love, kid.” She caught Elena’s eye for a moment and couldn’t help but blush a bit. “And love doesn’t weigh anything.”
“Even if there’s a lot?”
“Even if there’s a ton.”
Lucas quickly looked over at his mother for confirmation. “No matter how much love you have in your heart, it is always light as a feather,” Elena said, and Lucas narrowed his eyes.
“You sure, Momma?” he asked. “I got lots.”
“I know you do.” Elena tickled his belly and he giggled and squirmed in Allison’s arms. “You love Momma, don’t you?”
“Yup!”
“And Aunt Viv.”
“And Gram and Pop,” he said.
“That’s right.”
“That’s a lot of love, kid,” Allison said.
She then practically swooned as he leaned in and rested his head against hers again and said, “And Alson.”
Allison’s eyes instantly watered. She squeezed Lucas.
Elena smiled. “Yes, you love Allison.”
A tear slipped down her cheek. Wiping it away quickly, she smiled at Elena. “It’s crazy how that gets to me so easily.”
Elena stroked Allison’s cheek and nodded. “It does me as well, dear.”
Allison kissed Elena’s palm where it rested around her cheek before squeezing Lucas again. “I love you too, kid.”
“Well, this looks cozy.”
Nora and Lucas Sr. both stood at the end of the aisle watching them. Nora rolled her eyes, despite her smile. “My daughter is canoodling in the middle of the party supplies.”
“No one is canoodling, Mother.” Elena rolled her eyes in just the same fashion.
“Nah.” Allison laughed. “I was totally canoodling.”
“I like her,” Lucas Sr. told Elena.
Allison and little Lucas beamed while Elena smirked at her father. “So you’ve said, Daddy.”
“Well, some things need to be said more than once.” His voice was deep and cheerful. He then clapped his hands together and asked, “So, who is ready for lunch?”
