The tension in the car is thick. Like suffocatingly so.
When I listened to Collin’s message, I wanted nothing more than for a Hellmouth to open up beneath me and swallow me whole. There would be no badass Slayer coming in and saving the day either.
I’d deserve all the pain and the punishment.
Because I told him his ass was nice.
I fucking told him his ass was nice!
And what did he say to me?
It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because all I could think to say was something stupid, and every word he uttered in that deep, seductive voice of his was the opposite of that.
It was perfect.
It made my heart race. Made my fingertips tingle.
It made me feel alive.
And I screwed it all up.
“Col—”
“I think we should stop seeing each other.”
Those eight words feel like a thousand tiny razorblades slicing into my skin all at once.
But…I think he’s right. I think we should stop seeing each other too. Because clearly we’re not on the same page.
I think he has a nice ass, and him? He…
I can’t say it. I can’t even think it.
It hurts too much.
“Okay.”
“Okay,” he echoes, pulling into my apartment complex.
He pushes the gearshift into park and shuts off the car. He opens his door and rounds the front of the vehicle to mine.
Of course he’s going to walk me.
Of course he’s going to be a damn gentleman.
He pops open my door and holds his hand out for me.
Reflexively, I slide my palm against his, letting him help me out. I don’t bother acknowledging the tingles making their way through my body.
He clicks the key fob to lock his car, then rests his hand on my lower back, guiding me into the building.
We don’t speak as we step into the old, cramped elevator.
When we get to my door and I push the key into the hole, we’re quiet.
Even when Collin follows me inside and down the hallway to my bedroom, it’s silence.
When he peels my dress from my body and buries himself inside of me…nothing.
This is our goodbye.
He knows it and so do I.
We don’t try to ruin it with words.
In the morning when I wake up to a cold, empty bed, that’s when tears come.
I held him at arm’s length. Refused to let him in for fear of getting my heart broken.
I was a fool to think he wouldn’t break it anyway.
