“Come on man, poop already,” I mutter.
Sy is taking his sweet fuckin’ time this morning. Usually, we try to get over to the beach and do a sunrise walk, or he roams around while I surf. But I’ve got an earlier start than usual today. This dog needs to hurry up and make so I can bring him back upstairs.
I check my phone, tapping the message thread for Jake. Last night was weird. He disappeared into the bathroom for like twenty minutes. When he came out, he looked all flushed and glassy eyed. If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear to god he was hooking up in there. But I was right there when the door opened, and he came out alone.
I asked him about it on the drive home and he got all cagey, changing the subject. Something is up. I hate thinking he’s hiding something from me. That’s not how we are together. Or at least it wasn’t…but he’s been weird for a few months now.
I blame his Seattle Girl.
Jake went out to Seattle to meet up with Amy before training camp. He was so excited about it too. For weeks, it was all he could talk about. I mean, I don’t blame him. Amy is awesome. But then I got a desperate call from him that Amy’s flight was cancelled, and he was alone. Jake hates being alone. I talked him down and he promised to call me back after he got his flights changed.
Next thing I know, I don’t hear from the asshole for two fucking days. I was ready to call the Seattle police and start a manhunt. Then he shows up back in Jax with stars in his eyes, talking about his precious Seattle Girl. Best sex of his life, his every dream come true. Blah, blah, blah.
If she was so great, why did she ghost him? She snuck out before sunrise without leaving her name or her number. I’m not out here trying to rain on my best friend’s parade, but it doesn’t sound like the start to any love story I know.
For the past two months, I’ve watched him change. He’s gotten quieter, moodier. I mean, it’s all relative, so we’re talking Jake’s version of quiet. The man has no filter, no shame, and no ‘off’ switch. He used to drop everything and call me if he saw an interesting bird while driving. He can’t eat a meal unless he sends me a picture of it first. Now he’s doing fishy shit in the bathroom and hiding it from me.
I think the start of the season is coming at just the right time. We’ll get back on the road, and he can vent his frustrations over his lost Seattle Girl with a few bunnies. Not gonna lie, I’m squirming a bit just thinking about it. After a few bad experiences in college, the luster of the puck bunny life faded fast for me.
It took losing everything with my knee injury to face the truth I hid from everyone, including myself: I’m queer. Growing up in men’s locker rooms, I found ways to dissociate with that part of myself. If you’d tried telling twenty-year-old me that he liked sex with men, he would have laughed in your face.
When the burden of being an NHL star was suddenly yanked from my shoulders, I took my first unrestricted queer breath. I was free to explore what I’d kept buried all those years. A few drunken hookups in the back of bars revealed the surprising truth. Turns out I really like the feel of a dick in my mouth.
Not that I indulge very often. In fact, I haven’t gotten laid in like a year. I’m over the emptiness of bar hookups. I can take care of the urge with my hand. What I crave is something…deeper. I want connection and intimacy. Someone who challenges me. Someone who just…gets me.
If I can’t have that, I think I’d rather be alone.
I give Sy’s leash a little tug, turning to head back towards the apartment building. As I turn, I spot Rachel hopping down the stairs, phone in one hand, travel coffee mug in the other. Her dark hair is twisted up in a knot.
She doesn’t notice me or Sy as she heads over to her truck. I watch her slide to halt in front of the driver’s side door. She just stands there, looking at the handle. After a minute, she gets inside and shuts the door, but she doesn’t take off.
Curious, I wait. She turns the truck on, and it roars to life. She all but jumps in her seat at the sound and I smirk. What is this girl doing driving so much truck? She just sits there, both hands clutching to the top of the wheel, engine running.
Goddamn it.
I wander over, giving Sy’s leash another soft tug. He trots along happily. I step up to her window and tap.
She jumps, one hand flying to her chest, as she rolls down the window. “Ohmygod, you scared me half to death! Don’t you know you’re not supposed to sneak up on a woman in a parking lot?”
“I was right here the whole time,” I reply with a shrug. “You just weren’t paying attention to your surroundings.”
“Still,” she mutters, her hand going back on the wheel.
“Sooo…what are you doing in there, Hurricane?”
She narrows her dark eyes at me. “If I tell you, you’ll just mock me.”
I raise both hands, one wrist wrapped up in Sy’s leash. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”
She sighs. “Fine. I’m hyping myself up.”
I raise a brow. “What?”
“I may be a little bit nervous about driving this truck,” she admits. “I’m just not used to it yet,” she adds quickly.
“Why did you pick something so big if—”
“I didn’t,” she huffs. “I—it was the only option, apparently. Vicki said they got a deal.”
“You do know how to drive, right? Like, you’re legally licensed to operate a motorized vehicle?”
“Yes, Caleb,” she says with a roll of her eyes. “I’m a grown woman, a full medical doctor, and I have a driver’s license, okay? I just—” She goes silent, both hands still clutching the wheel.
“You just…what?”
“Ugh, fine! I’m just not a very confident driver, okay? I hate driving, and I’m not good at it. Some people are good driver’s and I’m just—I’m not. The gene totally skipped me,” she adds under her breath with a sniff.
Oh shit, is she about to fucking cry again?
“I’m sure you’re fine,” I say, shifting on my feet. I should walk away now. She’s clearly got this under control. Nothing to see here, folks.
She laughs, but it sounds weird. It’s too high and squeaky. “Oh yeah, I’m great. Super safe and reliable. I only failed my driver’s test three times!”
“You—three times? How is that even possible—”
“Hey, I aced my MCAT, thank you very much!” she snaps. “Driving is hard for some people. And I never had to learn growing up.”
“Where the hell did you live that you didn’t need to drive?”
“I always had a driver,” she says with a shrug.
I put the pieces together and grin. “Oh…shit. Hurricane, are you a silver spoon girl?”
She glances sharply over at me before dropping her gaze back to the wheel. “More like multi-platinum.”
“Rachel—”
“I’m fine, Caleb. I’m a big girl with a big freakin’ truck. I’d just maybe wait a few minutes before following me on the road,” she adds. “You know, for your own safety.”
Making the decision I should have made three minutes go, I shrug. “Why don’t I just drive you to work?”
Her gaze darts back over to me. “No.”
“Why not? We’re going to the same place. It’s better this way. More eco-friendly.”
“I don’t need to be driven around like some spoiled little rich girl. And I don’t want to upset Vicki either,” she adds. “The team is paying for me to have a truck as part of my fellowship. I can’t just not drive it. I’m fine, really,” she says again.
I shake my head with a laugh, patting my pockets. This girl is so damn stubborn. I’ve already got my keys and my wallet. I jerk open her car door.
She shrieks. “Caleb—what—”
“Move over.”
“What the hell are you doing?”
“You won’t let me drive you in my car, so I’m gonna drive this one. Unlike you, I love to drive, and I’m excellent at it. Now, move over.”
“God, this is so embarrassing,” she mumbles, unbuckling her seatbelt and climbing over the center console. I get a nice shot of her ass as she scrambles across.
“Sy, up,” I say, patting the seat.
He leaps into the driver’s seat, and she gasps with delight. “Oh my goodness. Is he coming with us?” She’s already got both hands out, rubbing his ears. The little traitor has his tail wagging in my face. I try to slap it down.
“Yeah—Sy, over,” I direct with a snap of my fingers.
Sy hops the seats into her lap.
“You’re such a cutie patootie. Yes, you are. Ugh, I’m obsessed with his eyes,” she coos, wrapping both arms around him as he straddles her lap and licks her face. “You’re coming to work with me. Daddy gets to see you all the time. Yes, he does. I’m never letting you go ever.” She kisses his face, and he eats it up like a total ham.
Lucky jerk.
I huff to myself. I have no idea where that thought came from. Sure, she’s gorgeous, but she’s also neurotic and kind of annoying. I smile to myself. She and Jake would be perfect for each other. My smile falls as I go still, my hand on the truck door.
Rachel and Jake. Why does the thought of them together turn me on as much as it terrifies me? I glance over at her, watching her buckle in as she talks nonsense to my dog. If this gorgeous, sophisticated, slightly neurotic doctor ever decided to give Jake Compton the time of day, it would be game over. She’d have him as her shadow for the rest of her natural life.
And then I’d lose him.
A reformed puck bunny-turned-kindergarten teacher I could compete with no problem. But Hurricane? Hell, no. She’d sweep him off his feet and drag him out to sea.
Shit, why do I suddenly feel like I’m sweating?
He took her number out of my phone the other day. Said he wanted it to haze her. He and Novy have taken it upon themselves to haze all the new staff, so I didn’t think much about it in the moment. Now I’m thinking I was a fucking idiot.
But her quiet confession from our first night together still simmers in the back of my mind. I held her on the balcony, her bare skin like heated silk under my fingertips. I miss him, she said, tears in her eyes. She’s already got a guy she’s totally hung up on. For the moment at least, Jake is safe.
