Venezuela
“You sure about this?” Nick asked as we made our way onto the tarmac of the little, private airport.
“Sure we can do it? Absolutely. The question is if you’re sure about it,” I answered. “You know Pax will keep the cameras off you if that’s why you’re worried.”
“It’s not the cameras.” He stopped close to the ramp that had been put up to the door of the small plane. “I just don’t want to get my hopes up, to think it’s something I can do only to find out he’s wrong.”
“I’m never wrong,” Cruz said, coming up behind him.
I made the mistake of looking at him, and immediately lost my train of thought. He had on simple cargo shorts, a tight, mouthwatering black Under Armour T-shirt, and a backward baseball hat.
He looked every inch of my Cruz and none of Dr. Delgado.
Six weeks together—almost three months since we’d met—and I couldn’t imagine not having him in my life. Sure, I was annoyed to hell that I couldn’t kiss him in public, that we had to watch our hands, our eyes, and our words, but in less than two weeks that would all be over.
Eleven days.
We could go public, and I couldn’t wait.
“You sure?” Nick asked, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Absolutely. I’ve done the research, Little John ordered the gear, and we’re going to do this. But only if you want. I’m not in the habit of throwing people off mountains who don’t want to jump,” Cruz told him.
“And you don’t mind not wingsuiting with these nuts?” Nick motioned to where Pax and Landon handed over Rachel’s and Leah’s gear.
“I have hundreds of jumps under my belt, and I’m completely happy never looking like a flying squirrel. A man has to have some dignity. Besides, it would be my honor to jump next to you.”
Nick sucked in a breath and looked around our small posse. It was an Originals-only trip, but with the cameras on board, Cruz was here in an official capacity. Unofficially, he’d found a way to light a fire in Nick I hadn’t seen in the last year, and I was immeasurably thankful.
“Hey, can we do some tape real fast?” Bobby asked me, and I grimaced.
“Absolutely. Now seems like the perfect time, don’t you think?” I quipped sarcastically.
“They’re still loading the plane, and Pax told us that we’d be in the distance for most of this trip. We’re only allowed to capture the jump from below the falls. GoPros only on top.”
I could have kissed Pax. That gave Nick a sense of privacy for the moment he’d have to make the actual decision.
“Ask away,” I told him.
“So we’re here in Venezuela, and you’re taking two days off the super ramp. This close to the open, when you haven’t landed the double back, do you think that’s the smartest course of action?”
And I was back to wanting to punch him.
I forced the Rebel smile. “I think we’re in Venezuela. Angel Falls is a BASE jumper’s dream, let alone with wingsuits. It’s hard to pass that up.”
“And the double backflip?”
“We still have the ramps in Aruba and the day before in Cuba. If I nail it, I’ll use it in the Open.”
“And if you don’t?”
“Then I won’t use it.”
Bobby’s face fell. Crashes had always brought more hits than successful jumps. Nothing like the promise of watching someone demolish his or her body to get the clicks.
“And now that Zoe’s been sent back to the States, do you feel like you should reevaluate the training regimen? It’s hard to lose another Renegade this close to the end.”
“Zoe’s injury was definitely unfortunate, but as Renegades, we’re personally liable for our own safety and our own decisions. We wish her the best for recovery and can’t wait to see her back in L.A. at the Renegade Ranch.”
Bobby’s gaze narrowed. “And how is the loss of another Renegade woman affecting you? It can’t be easy being one of the only women in the company, and especially with the loss of your sister—”
“And we’re done!” I gave Bobby a go-to-hell smile and turned on my heel to find Cruz waiting.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Fan-fucking-tastic,” I answered, climbing up the stairs to the plane.
At some point I was going to have to answer the questions, especially the ones I asked myself whenever Brooke came to mind.
…
Four hours and another airport later, we lifted off with a fleet of three helicopters. The leafy green canopy fell away from us as we flew across the Canaima National Park toward the tabletop mountain.
Our helicopter was Originals-only. Nick, Pax, Landon, and me.
It felt like it had with every stunt before Nick had been injured—the four of us setting out to see what record we could break, what experience we could capture. Except we were in a foreign country, headed toward the tallest waterfall in the world, and one of us couldn’t walk.
We weren’t indestructible anymore, and we knew it, but we still had one another.
“How are you feeling?” I asked Nick through the headset.
“I haven’t decided,” he answered.
“Don’t take this as a hallmark moment, but damn, it’s nice to be back together,” Landon said, looking at me over his shoulder.
“Yeah, it really is,” I told him. My heart was full as we curved along the river, coming closer to the flat-topped mountain. The waterfall came into view, and my breath stalled in my chest. How was I so lucky that this was my life? “There she is.”
“Whoa,” Nick said, looking out the window.
“I’m glad you’re here,” I told him.
“Me, too.”
“Hey,” Bobby said through the headset. We’d left him on the ground with the rest of the production crew. “You know there’s still time just in case you’ve chosen to let us tape this…” He sounded hopeful.
“Not a chance in hell,” Pax said with a small laugh. “Whatever we record on the GoPros is fair game, but the rest is for us and us alone. Just this one time.”
Bobby sighed. “Yeah, I figured it was going to be something like that.”
“You’ve got guys on the ground?” Landon asked.
“Two crews. One at the landing site for the wingsuits, and one for the BASE jumpers. That BASE footage is just for you. Not the documentary. You know I’d kill to include it, but this is your private moment, and that footage is for your personal use.”
“Thank you. I appreciate it,” Nick said.
“Thank you for choosing me for this job in the first place. You guys enjoy your jump.”
We landed before the others, giving Landon and Pax time to get Nick into his chair. We’d chosen the smoothest drop-off location, the one with the easiest path to get Nick to the edge.
The plateau was lush and green with trees and giant boulders, with no hint that the edge dropped off over three thousand feet to the bottom. I stepped out onto the rough gray stone and stood as close to the edge as I dared without a chute and looked over the view, trying to take in every detail. A few moments later, the helicopter took off, and the guys flanked me. I’d never felt so small and yet a part of something so big.
There were so many things about this trip I could do again if I wanted. Anytime I felt like it, I could hop a flight to Istanbul, or hike up to Everest base camp, or visit Machu Picchu. But this—standing on the top of Angel Falls with all of my best friends—this was a once-in-a-lifetime kind of moment and was all the more precious for it.
“Some life we have,” Pax said.
“Not too bad,” Nick added.
“Ever wonder why it is we find the best views, highest peaks, and then hurl ourselves off them?” Landon asked.
“Because it’s fun,” I answered with a shrug.
The guys laughed, and our moment passed as the next helicopter landed. Cruz got out, helping Rachel down.
As the chopper lifted off, it felt like it took a few hundred pounds of pressure with it. No production crew this time, just us. I glanced around at my friends, all working their gear, even Cruz latching Nick into the chair with the harness he designed, and I smiled.
This is more like it.
Here we weren’t documentary stars. There was no pressure for ratings, for the perfect shot. We were just a group of friends with a few GoPros about to pull off something epic.
I picked the spot next to Pax and laid out my gear, winding the straps of the rig through my wingsuit.
“What are you thinking about?” Pax asked.
“We’re about to hurl ourselves off a three-thousand-foot cliff.”
“Right.”
“With no parachute.”
“True.”
“Interesting day.”
“Interesting life,” he said with a grin.
Rachel motioned to me, and I walked up the hill to meet her. “What’s up? You ready to jump with Cruz?” I asked. She’d be BASE jumping just ahead of Nick on Cruz’s team.
“As ready as I’ll ever be. He chose the best place with the sheerest drop for Nick, so there’s almost no chance of…”
“Of him slamming into one of the outcroppings beneath?” I suggested.
“Yeah, that. I’ll jump first, then Cruz is going to literally push our friend off the mountain. The plan is damn near flawless.”
“Good.”
“Oh, and he wants to see you,” she said, motioning to the rock formation to my right, closer to the falls.
“Thank you. And thanks again for not telling anyone. I know it’s above and beyond.”
Her eyes darted to Landon. “I hate keeping something from him. You need to tell them soon.”
“I’m scared they won’t understand.” Pax would think I’d been taken advantage of, and Landon would simply think I’d lost my mind.
“It’s not their job to understand. It’s their job to support and protect you, the same way you’ve done for them time and again. But you owe them the chance to be that for you.”
She was right. We’d be at the Cuba Open in a week, and then Miami. I needed to tell them first as long as Cruz was okay with it. I’d promised to keep us a secret, and I would until he was in the clear. I thanked her for covering for me and raced over to the rock formation.
“I hate sneaking around like this,” Cruz said, pulling me into his arms.
We were sheltered here, hidden from the others.
“We won’t have to for much longer, right?”
He nodded, his chin resting on the top of my head. “Just a couple weeks. Then we’ll be back in Miami, heading to L.A., and you’ll no longer be my student.”
“And we can be open?” There was still a part of me, as small as it was, that was terrified he’d change his mind—that I was nothing more than a ship fling with a touch of taboo for excitement.
“I’ll change my Facebook relationship status and everything,” he said, laughing.
I tilted my head up for a kiss, and he more than obliged. Our tongues tangled and danced to the symphony of rushing water behind us. That same energy took hold of me, all of my senses focusing on Cruz—his taste, scent, the feel of his hair in my fingers, the sound of my name on his lips. How did this get better every time?
“We should get back to the others,” I said, reluctantly pulling myself from the kiss.
“True. Be careful, okay?” His thumbs stroked my cheekbones.
“Always. You, too.”
Our eyes locked, and I leaned up on my toes, kissing him softly. “I love you.”
“I love you more,” he said, pressing a small, pink flower into my hand. “I found it near the edge of the cliff.”
“Thank you,” I told him, holding the flower as I walked away. It had narrow petals in the shape of a triangle with a smaller bud at the end. I’d never seen anything like it. It was an original, just like the man who gave it to me.
Careful with my footsteps, I made my way back down to the launch zone, tucking the flower into my breast pocket for safekeeping.
“Everything okay?” Landon asked.
“Perfect,” I said with a smile, and meant it.
“Okay, then let’s get to it,” he ordered with a clap of his hands and a mile-wide grin.
A few moments later, I’d threaded myself through the harness straps and zipped up all but the leg portion of the suit. Helmet clasped, double checked, and nerves setting off fireworks in my belly, I walked to the edge of the outcropping we’d chosen. We were only a couple dozen feet from the falls, and I turned to look at the gorgeous cascade of water, glad my GoPro was on to capture the moment.
A quick look to our right saw Rachel, Cruz, and Nick ready to go on their ledge.
“You ready?” Nick shouted over the distance as I zipped up my leg panels and pulled the boot portion over my shoes. Flying squirrel, indeed.
“You first!” Landon yelled back.
“You always were a chickenshit!” Nick answered. “Let me guess, you’ve made Pax go first in everything since I’ve been out, right?”
“I was just trying to be polite,” Landon muttered as Paxton laughed uncontrollably. “Oh, just fuck off and go! No, not you, baby. You go when you’re ready,” Landon added when Rachel crossed her arms. “Love you!”
“Yeah, yeah. Love you, too,” she answered.
She and Cruz shared a nod, and then she jumped. I noticed Landon didn’t take a breath until her chute deployed, and then he rocked back on his heels with a huge sigh.
“We’ll see you at the bottom!” I called out to Nick.
He gave us a thumbs-up, and then Cruz backed up about fifteen feet with Nick. They said something to each other—man, I wished we were closer—and then Cruz took off at a run, shoving Nick with all his might at the edge of the cliff before skidding back himself.
My heart lurched into my throat as the chair tumbled once, twice, and then the chute deployed, the sight allowing air into my lungs. “He did it.”
“Hell yeah, he did,” Pax said softly.
Cruz nodded to me—well, toward us, but I knew it was for me—and jumped off the cliff. He dove fast, and I found myself leaning way too far over the edge to watch him pass Nick and then pull his own chute.
“Ballsy to wait that long,” Landon remarked.
“He wants to land before Nick so he can help him,” I said.
“He’s a good guy,” Pax added.
“The best,” I said before I thought.
They both looked at me, and I avoided eye contact. Rachel was right. It might get me bitten in the ass, but I was going to have to tell them. Keeping a secret like this from my best friends was wrong, no matter how much I loved Cruz.
“Shall we do this?” I asked, changing the subject.
“I’m going first,” Landon said, and I smothered a laugh.
“Yes, you should do that.”
“Same plan. Watch the curve of the canyon.”
“Yes, Dad,” Pax drawled.
“See you at the bottom!” Landon gave us a grin and then raced to the edge of the cliff and was gone.
“You’re up,” Pax told me. “And hey, random, but you know you can always talk to me, right?”
“Like, right now?” I eyed the drop-off.
“Well, no. I mean, yeah, if you wanted to.”
I patted him on the shoulder. “I hear you, and I love you for it. But I was thinking I’d jump off this mountain right now, if you don’t mind.”
“After you,” he said, sweeping his arm toward the cliff edge.
My heart galloped as I backed up, already feeling the rush of adrenaline through my veins. Restrained by the suit, I took as big of steps as I could and ran toward the edge of the cliff.
Then I flew.
No parachute. No engine. No sounds but the wind through my helmet and the rush of blood through my ears.
Arms and legs spread, with the webbing of nylon that turned me into my own sail, I glided through the air, careful to watch the curve of the canyon. A single mistake up here would be my last.
I flew past the falls, taking precious seconds to stare up at the sheer majesty of the breathtaking sight, and then focused fully on the flight, tracking Landon as he soared ahead of me. I dropped my right arm slightly to change course, avoiding the giant pillar of cliff that loomed, and headed toward the green vegetation that marked our planned landing zone. It was just beside the river, but treeless, so hopefully I wouldn’t end up skewered in the middle of Venezuela.
Landon waved me down, having already landed, and I concentrated on my angle, speed, and descent as the field flew up rapidly to meet me. I ran through my landing, tripping on some of the foliage but catching myself before I ended up on a blooper reel.
The flight was beautiful, life-affirming, empowering, and over all too soon.
Landon whooped and gathered me into his arms, swinging me around. I was mid-swing when Pax landed, and we became a Penna-sandwich hug.
“Thank you for this,” I told them as Bobby’s Jeeps drove over.
“I’ll admit, I thought you were nuts when you suggested it,” Pax said as Bobby parked and the cameras rushed us. “But I should know better by now than to question your judgment.”
A few quick interviews later, we were out of the wingsuits and headed to meet up with the BASE jumpers.
I smiled at Cruz, but the three of us walked straight to Nick, who grinned wider than when he’d medaled in the X Games a couple years ago.
“How do you feel?” I asked him.
He looked at each of us in turn and then laughed incredulously, his expression torn between wonder, joy, and a touch of confusion. “Like a Renegade.”
