HIDING my reaction to him for the rest of the trip proved more difficult. His presence weighed me down at every turn.
We would go out to eat and he’d sit next to me as if he thought we’d suddenly become friends. When I ordered a helping of the pig roast, he scrunched up his nose as if I offended him. Then he went on to tell the table about the detriment of meat to our health.
Of course Jett was vegan. His overly practical mind couldn’t fathom eating food for pleasure. Food was fuel and, according to him, meat was like feeding your body unleaded when you could have diesel.
Nope, he corrected to electric.
We’d have sundowners on the hotel beach and he’d hover at my elbow like a pesky fly, a very large, very sexy pesky fly.
We would go for a hike and he’d decide to come with, even though he complained the whole time.
On a particularly rigorous hike, he critiqued my hiking style the whole way, telling me I needed better shoes and I was going to fall, and then he smiled smugly when I did.
I didn’t give in to the weight of his negativity. Even on that hike, covered in mud from my fall, I made it all the way to the Queen’s Bath. The rocks jutted up against one another as we climbed them along the water’s edge. A steep slope fed into a pool of crystal-blue water. The surf lapped at the rock surrounding it as one wave crashed in and the bath swelled with more water.
I turned to him and said it would be the best way to get rid of the mud but he scolded me about my clothes getting wet.
So I started to pull my shirt over my head, undeterred, but he growled as he grabbed my arm and told me I’d better fucking not. I wasn’t sure if he was possessive or concerned others would judge us, but I let it go. Instead, I waded in with my outfit on and made sure to tell him how amazing the water felt. I sighed and moaned as I washed the mud off, like it was the most pleasurable experience of my life. I told him it was even better because I’d fallen and could wash the mud off.
Then my last morning in Kauai came. I sat on top of a cliff, watching the water down below.
The day was chilly and cloudy, but the sea was calm, waves barely lapping at the rocks. The soft breeze blew through my hair, reminding me to relax and let the wind whisk away any anxieties.
I ducked under the chain fence that kept people away from the cliff’s edge and stepped right up to it. All I saw was green mountains and water meeting the clouds on the horizon. Standing on the bluff, witnessing nature in all its glory, made me feel bigger and smaller than ever before at precisely the same time. I sat down and let the feeling wash over me.
“Fuck me, woman. You shouldn’t sit so close to the edge.” His voice made me jump.
‘Jesus! Warn someone when you’re behind them. Especially when they’re on the edge of a cliff.’
‘Like I said, move back. There’s a reason for the fence,’ he commanded as he wiggled the chain.
I turned back toward the sea. “I’m not moving.”
I heard a low grumble and then he sighed. ‘God damn it.’
I turned to find him maneuvering under the chain before sitting right behind me. I furrowed my brows. “What are you doing?”
He tucked his legs on either side of me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. ‘Making sure you don’t die on this trip because apparently you have a death wish.’
I glared. ‘No, I don’t.’
‘You went on about a hundred dangerous hikes and whenever you came across a sign saying danger or caution, you did exactly what it said not to do.’
I shrugged. ‘You only live once, right?’
‘Can’t enjoy it if you’re dead because you fell off a cliff.’
‘I’m aware that I can’t enjoy things if I’m dead, Jett.’
‘Could have fooled me,’ he murmured as he nuzzled into my neck and looked out at the sea.
I let the conversation die. I didn’t want to argue while I took in the sun on the water or the waves breaking against the rock wall. We stayed cuddled against one another for too long. So long that I memorized the way I felt secured in his arms. I memorized how he smelled—like a citrus soap mixed with sea water—and how his chest felt like solid, steady ground against my back. I tried to catch my heart as it fell for Jett but it may as well have been plunging over that cliff. The slope was steep, jagged, and too severe to correct.
Just as I was about to drag myself away from Jett, I saw a movement against the waves. At first, the tiny splash drew my attention because it deviated from the natural current. When nothing more happened, I scanned the water one last time and started to stand.
Jett’s hand grabbed my thigh, holding me there. He pointed just a little way from where I had seen the first splash. ‘Baby whale,’ he whispered.
I tried not to blink.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
The sound in my head reminded me to absorb this moment as once in a lifetime, as a moment I may have never gotten.
My eyes scoured the water again. I didn’t want to miss anything. I stared so hard I began to think I’d imagined the splash. From the water, breaking the slight ripples, jumped a baby humpback whale. Right after, the mother followed. She soared through the sky like she could fly and the sun rays caught the water glistening over her body. She sparkled, she glimmered, she erupted with life.
I didn’t realize I was squealing until Jett nudged his chest into my back. “They can’t hear you, Vick.”
“I saw a humpback whale.” I looked over my shoulder at him and he attempted to hide his grin, but his lips curled at the corners.
“Yes, you saw a humpback whale and a baby one too.”
“It jumped out of the freaking ocean, Jett.” I couldn’t be quiet if I wanted to.
“They do that sometimes, Pix.”
“This is officially the best trip I’ve ever been on. I can’t believe that happened. I mean, we were just sitting here, and they jumped out like they wanted us to see them, like they wanted to be a part of my day.”
“They jumped out because that’s what they do. They have to breathe,” he deadpanned.
“Fine.” I would give him that. “They probably didn’t care if I saw them, but still ….”
His smile finally came out to play, and it reached all the way across his face, enough to crinkle the corners of his eyes.
He was so appealing when he smiled, like he had all this happiness bottled up in him he didn’t want to share with anyone. When he unleashed it, it blinded me to everything but him. The wind had tousled his jet black hair, and his blue eyes mirrored the sea below us.
On the edge of the world, I didn’t question myself when I leaned in and kissed him.
He wrapped a hand around my neck and kissed me back.
He tasted of Hawaiian sea and sun and love.
We made out on the edge of that cliff for maybe a minute. Maybe an hour. I lost track of time. I was more focused on how his hands slid over every part of my body he could reach, how his mouth owned every part of mine.
When he finally leaned back to stop us from going too far, he raked his gaze over me and grumbled, “I would screw you on the edge of this cliff if it wasn’t so dangerous.”
I smirked. “I’m game if you are.”
“You have a death wish, Pix.” He stood up and pulled me with him, lifting me over the chain with no struggle.
“I don’t. I just like to–”
“Have fun. I know. But vacation ends today when we fly back. You ready to face the real world?”
“My real world is still fun. I’m happy to get back to my day-to-day.”
We started walking back to our places. “You enjoy the city that much?”
“I’m loving it.” I practically burst with emotion. The city had always seemed out of my reach. I was so damn happy to be experiencing the hustle and bustle of it all over the past month that I would tell anyone about it. “The jostling to get to work every morning, the way people are so driven they would literally fight you to get one step ahead. Sounds weird, but the pulse of the city is amazing.”
He grunted.
“I’m lucky. I get to work near my best friend and do what I love. Steven gave me a great opportunity.”
He nodded. “Yes. Sounds like Stevie really does you a lot of favors.”
“He’s an exceptional friend.”
Jett looked my way, and his smile was slow. “If that’s what you call it.”
I quirked a brow. “That’s what I call it. And I know what you’re insinuating. I’m honest. I’d let you know if I’d slept my way into a position. But I’m an associate and Steven hasn’t even asked me out yet. I hope he does though.”
We came to the fork in the road where our paths separated. Jett didn’t stop walking like I expected.
I thought maybe he would confess that he wanted my number, that we should try to give it a go back home. He turned to the right and said over his shoulder, “I hope he does too. I’m sure, even having only seen him on your annoying FaceTime, you would make a picture-perfect couple and your wedding would be just as beautiful as Brey and Jax’s.”
I glared at him. “You say that sarcastically, but it could happen.”
He kept walking away without looking back at me. So I yelled after him, “One day you’ll come across the love of your life and your cynical ass will miss it. You’ll regret it too. Just wait and see.”
His laugh carried over the wind. “Goodbye, Victoria.”
I let him go. That man wasn’t mine to change.
He was a glorious distraction that I had gotten too wrapped up in.
I had indulged myself and allowed everything I did with him to touch me deeply. But I refused to have regrets.
On the flight back, I wrote him off.
And back in Chicago, I forgot all about him.
Or so I told myself.
