‘He should have been here by now.’ Leo sighed, playing anxiously with his lip piercings. We had both tried calling him but hadn’t received a response. There was no text or call back. Anytime we tried to call, it went straight to voicemail. From there, we started to worry.
‘His phone is probably dead,’ I said, knowing that wasn’t the case. I don’t know what it is, but I have this sinking feeling in my stomach that something is wrong. I couldn’t tell you what it was, however; having Lucas not answering the phone was only making the feeling worse. My mind kept coming up with worse case scenarios to torture me further.
‘Yeah probably,’ he sighed, not convinced.
‘What should we do? Want to try to see if anyone else has heard from him?,” I asked, hoping he would say yes, because I don’t have Lisa or Rachel’s number.
‘Shit.’ I heard Leo curse under his breath before he answered his phone. ‘Hello?’ His voice sounded so scared, like he was bracing himself for the worst news. He stood up immediately, as if the couch had caught fire beneath him. ‘Is he okay?….What hospital?….We’re on our way.’
‘What is it?’ I asked, feeling my heart race with worry. I felt myself taking panicked breaths and tried to calm myself until he answered.
‘Lucas has been in an accident. We need to go to the hospital. Grab your stuff, let’s go.’ Leo didn’t give me a chance to ask anything more, as we practically ran to his car. He sped through the streets, straight to the hospital with a look of determination. I chewed at the side of my nail the entire time from the anxiety festering inside of me. I’m scared as hell right now. My worry and anxiety only rose more with each step I took towards the hospital.
When the double doors slid open to the emergency room, we were met by a crying Sarah and Lisa. Rachel was off in the corner, looking tortured as hell as she stared at the ground like a comatose patient. Kane was beside his daughter in a lab coat, holding her hand for comfort.
‘What happened?’ Leo asked before I could even find my voice.
‘That asshole ran a red light and hit his car!’ Rachel seethed, pointing at a teenage boy with a baseball cap and a look of utter horrification. He saw her finger pointed at him and he physically paled. It was obvious the kid was full of remorse and deep regret.
‘He’s got a bad head wound and a broken arm. They are stitching him up and taking an MRI. He’s currently unconscious, but they said they would come get us when he woke,’ Lisa added, holding Sarah in her arms.
Leo seemed so scared, probably having a lot of trauma brought up. I can’t imagine what it must be like to hear someone you love is in a car accident after you’ve lost people in a wreck. I am starting to understand the whole ‘celebrate the good when you can’ thing now. I felt so sick to my stomach thinking of Lucas being hurt. I felt like I was going to throw up.
‘He’s okay.’ Rachel looked at Leo as she spoke. ‘He’s going to be okay.’
‘Rachel’s right. It could have been so much worse. Lucas is going to be okay, and in a little while, we’ll all be with him.’ Kane added, trying to persuade us all since he’s the doctor of the group. We all sat in the lobby for what felt like eons before a nurse came out. We all stood up and rushed towards her. I am sure we scared her as her eyes widened and her voice shook.
‘He’s awake now. You’re welcome to visit him two at a time. We don’t want to strain him too much at once. He’s got a concussion with a large laceration to the forehead. His arm is currently pinned until we can go in tomorrow and surgically fix its fragments. Be careful not to move his arm when you go in,’ she explained. ‘Who would like to go first?’
‘I would. I’m his mother.’ Sarah stepped up, tears in her eyes. ‘Lisa and I shall go first.’
‘Follow me.’
The nurse took them down the hall past the double doors and to his room. I stood planted to my spot like the roots of a tree. I didn’t want to move. Leo stood beside me, taking my hand and squeezing it as we both stared at those double doors, waiting for them to open again. Nothing needed to be said, we knew exactly how the other was feeling. Eventually, Lisa and Sarah came back out. They seemed in better spirits than before, but there was still a look of concern on their faces.
‘Rachel, Leo, you guys go next.’ Sarah called to them. Leo gave me an apologetic look as he stepped forward. I shook my head motioning for him to go. He was his best friend and Rachel was his family, of course, they would all go before me. I’m just the girlfriend…the very new girlfriend. Sarah and Lisa had left, feeling their presence was no longer warranted now that they knew Lucas would be okay. It was just Kane and I as he waited for Rachel to emerge.
‘Olive, right?’ Kane asked me as he sat on the chair. I had remained in my spot this entire time, unable to move or sit. It was like my legs refused to move unless it was towards him. I turned my head to look at Kane for a moment before looking back at the double doors.
‘Yes, that’s right.’
‘I see you’ve managed to stick around longer than all the other girls,’ he mused, making me turn to look at him a bit flabbergasted.
‘I see you like to stick your foot in your mouth.’ I rolled my eyes at him. He, surprisingly, chuckled at me.
‘That was a bit rude, wasn’t it? I am sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you. I’m surprised to see Lucas staying with one girl again.’
‘Yeah, I got that.’ I didn’t hide the irritation in my voice. Right now, all I wanted was to see Lucas with my own eyes, to hold his hand and somehow make him better. Instead, I’m stuck out here waiting my turn as one of the last ones to see him. I’m stuck out here with Kane’s unwanted commentary.
‘I think I see what he sees in you,’ he noted in amusement.
Some time later, Rachel and Leo emerged. They seemed a bit more at ease now, too. I was ready for my turn, finally having my legs move. I brushed past Rachel and Leo, straight to the nurse. She led me down the hall right to Lucas’ room. The lights were off with the exception of a small, dim lamp on the bedside table.
Lucas laid with his eyes closed. His head was bandaged around his forehead while his arm rested on a pillow with some kind of device to hold it still. My eyes watered as I took his hurt state in. It could have been worse. The thought made me feel like I’d shit my stomach out. I didn’t want to lose him right after I found him. He means so much to me. I somehow convinced my legs to take a few extra steps towards him. I grabbed his good hand, feeling him squeeze it in return.
‘I was wondering if my Rose would be coming.’ His voice was scratchy, almost like he swallowed glass.
‘How are you feeling? Are you in pain? What can I do to help?’ I asked him in rapid succession, unable to calm myself.
‘Come lay with me.’ Lucas patted the small bed beside him. I didn’t hesitate to climb in beside him carefully. I laid my head on his chest, hearing his steady heartbeat. With each beat of his heart, mine calmed. I let a tear fall, hitting his chest on its way down. He’s okay.
‘I’m sorry, Rose. I wasn’t being careful. My mind was a million miles away, and I wanted to get home to you.’ His good hand began to rub my arm as he spoke.
‘You don’t have anything to be sorry about. You didn’t do anything wrong.’ I shook my head at him.
‘But I did.’ His words made me pause, stopping my movements and my heart.
‘What do you mean?’
‘I went and saw your dad with Davis and Carter.’ He admitted. I sat up as best I could, looking down at his wounded state. I couldn’t be mad even if I wanted to be now. ‘I wanted him to leave, so I offered to buy his silence, and make him leave without seeing you.’ He continued, making me upset at the fact he tried to offer my dad money.
‘Keep going,’ I said, knowing there was probably more.
‘He came to town to tell you he’s having a baby with his girlfriend.’ He sighed. Dad is having another kid? I shook my head hysterically. This can’t be happening!
He can’t have another kid. He can’t!
‘Rose, the baby won’t be due for a while and you’re so close to finishing college. I know you’re going to want to go back home and help care for a baby that isn’t even yours, but you need to remember how much you put up with in high school to get here. Don’t go back, at least not until you graduate. Please Olive! Don’t go.’ He squeezed my hand, staring up at me like I could hurt him further with my answer.
‘When is the baby due?’
‘End of April. Three weeks without you there to help. Then we can rush to New Hampshire and help from there.’
‘We?’ I didn’t miss the fact he was offering to come with me.
My mind was still reeling from the news, trying to determine my best course of action. If I were only thinking about myself, then the choice would be obvious, but this involves more than my life. This involves the life of an innocent child. I want to say they will be okay, but I know Dad. What if he beats his girlfriend while she’s pregnant and ends up killing his unborn child? I have no idea how he was with mom when she was pregnant with me. I am not sure when he even started to hit her.
‘Of course, we, Rose. I told you, I’m never letting you go again. If you need to move back to New Hampshire to help, then I’m moving with you,’ he said so matter-of-factly, it caught me off guard. He’d move states with me…for me. I felt my eyes tearing up, overwhelmed by all the emotions I was feeling. I thought of how I could have lost him today and the waterworks started to flow. He’s everything to me already, and it’s scary how fast my life now revolves around him. I leaned forward carefully, trying not to hurt him, and kissed him gently. Yes, I was mad he tried to offer money to my dad to make him leave. I was more upset that he had planned to keep this baby a secret from me, but I still love him. In the end, he did the right thing, so I can’t exactly be too upset with him.
‘I love you so much, Lucas,’ I whispered to him as I pulled away from our kiss.
‘I love you, too. So very much, Rose.’
‘Don’t ever try to keep something like this from me again, and definitely never use your money to try to make a problem go away,’ I lightly scolded him.
‘Yes, sir,’ he joked, but when he looked down into my eyes he got serious. ‘I won’t, Rose. I promise.’
I nodded my head, content with his promise, before I closed my eyes and continued to focus on the beat of his heart. The heart that keeps my Knight alive. The heart that stole my own. I don’t ever want to lose him. Not ever. I’ll stay by his side for as long as he’ll have me. I will fight for us, and like all my fights, I’m determined to win. Our relationship will flourish. I will make sure of it.
‘I can’t lose you, Lucas. Please, be more careful,’ I whispered into the air.
‘You won’t lose me, Rose. I don’t plan on letting you go anytime soon. That includes dying.’ He wrapped his good arm around me, holding me tight against him. He kissed my forehead as he squeezed my arm. I could feel the tenderness of his actions. He loves me too, and I hope it’s as much as I love him. I bit my cheek as I recalled the words Hailey spoke to me this afternoon. I won’t know if I don’t ask. He won’t know if I don’t tell.
‘Lucas?’ He hummed in response. He was tired. I could hear it.
‘I want to tell you something, but I’m worried it will freak you out. I don’t want to scare you away, but I also want you to know how I feel. I don’t expect you to feel the same way. I will patiently wait until you do, if that’s the case.’
I paused for a moment, waiting for him to respond, but he didn’t. I looked up to find him peacefully sleeping. His face was relaxed, showing me a side to him I had not seen often. I’m usually the first to fall asleep, but not always the first to wake. I could count the times I’ve seen Lucas asleep, in one hand. I smiled as I looked at him, happy to see he was getting some rest. What I was about to tell him can wait for another day.
I carefully slid my phone out of my pocket and shot Leo a text. I told him to go ahead and leave. I’ll stay here tonight with him, because there’s no way I can leave his side. I let myself fall asleep beside him. It was a tight squeeze, and a bit uncomfortable, but there’s nowhere else I would rather be.
I was woken up by a nurse in the middle of the night and asked to move to a little cot. They were worried about me hurting his arm, and they needed easy access to him. I hated to leave the warmth of his embrace, but I did as they asked.
‘You stayed with me, Rose?’ His hoarse voice woke me easily in the silence of the room. I peeked at him through my lashes, giving him a small smile. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, stretching my body to try to wake myself better.
‘Of course. I didn’t want to leave you here alone,’ I answered him.
‘Thank you,’ he said, giving me that delicious smirk of his. The one that made my heart soar and my core dampen.
‘How are you feeling?’
‘Sore, very, very sore.’
‘I’m sorry. I’ll get a nurse and see if they can give you anything.’
‘Don’t bother. I don’t want you to leave.’ He shook his head lightly.
‘Don’t be silly. You’re in pain, it’ll only be a second.’ I got off the cot, heading towards the door.
‘A second too long.’ I heard him whisper as I left. I found the nurse, and she said she’d be down soon to take him back to surgery. They’ll be fixing his arm today. Thinking of him in surgery made me nervous even though the chances of anything bad happening were slim. When I returned to the room, Lucas seemed almost upset. He patted the bed beside him again.
‘We need to talk,’ he said, making me all kinds of nervous.
Lucas’ P.O.V.
**Please, if you’re willing, listen to Photography by Cody Fry as you read.**
My Rose stayed here with me last night. She had slept beside me until they made her move. Stupid nurse. I couldn’t believe she would willingly choose to sleep in a small cot like that rather than in a large bed. I want to tell her how I feel….how I really feel. She is everything to me and she needs to know it. I need her to know, but I’m also scared I’ll frighten her away. She can be so skittish at times.
‘What’s wrong?’ She asked, seeming shy. I didn’t mean to worry her, but I need her to know I am being serious.
‘Come here,’ I said, patting the bed again. She slowly made her way towards me.
‘I’m here,’ she announced as she sat on the edge of the bed. I used my good hand to grab hers, holding it tight in case she tried to run away.
‘I need to tell you something, but you can’t run away after,’ I said, smirking at her sweetly, but my heart was beating quickly. She gave me a small nod in understanding, letting me continue. ‘I’ve told you I love you already, but I need you to know what I mean when I say that. I don’t say it lightly, and I certainly don’t confuse it for the attraction I have for you. You’re the one thing that keeps me from suffocating in my own darkness. The person who brings me hope when the world is crashing down on me. I told you that you saved me, and I meant it. You’ve brought light into my life again. One that I refuse to let go of. I don’t want to fall into that darkness again.’ Her eyes were on me as I spoke, but I couldn’t look into them. I wanted to pour out my heart to her, and looking at her would only tie up my tongue.
‘When I say I love you, I mean that I cherish you. That you are the most important person in my life. When I say I love you, I mean that I will be by your side always. That I will support you in whatever you do. When I say I love you, I mean that I will not let you get hurt. That I will protect you with everything in me. When I say I love you, I mean I am happy as long as I have you. Do you understand what I am saying, Olive? I love you in all sense and meaning of the word.’
It was silent for a while, causing me to look up at her finally. Her eyes were pink and misted as she bit her lip. She nodded her head at me, but I couldn’t tell what she was feeling or thinking at the moment.
‘When I say I love you, I mean that I will give you all of me. That you will have my heart and my soul with you always.’ She started, making my heart swell and my eyes tear instantly. ‘When I say I love you, I mean that I will stick by your side through thick or thin. That I will not leave you, even when you send me away. When I say I love you, I mean that I will fight for you. That I will fight with you, if it’s for your own good. When I say I love you, I mean that you are my everything. That I will place your needs before my own. I love you, my Knight, in all senses of the word.’ I nodded my head, feeling overwhelmed and elated by her confession. She was on the same page as me, if not further in. Don’t worry, Rose, I’m right there with you.
‘No running away?’ she asked me.
‘No running away.’ I confirmed, pulling her towards me. Our moment was cut short before I could kiss her the way I wanted to. The nurse had come in with the anesthesiologist, and they had begun to prep me and roll me out to surgery.
‘I’ll be here waiting,’ she promised in a hushed voice.
I nodded, still riding the high of knowing she loves me so much. I wanted to be back by her side already, but the pain in my arm let me know this surgery was necessary. They wheeled me to the surgical room, having me hop onto the surgical table. They placed the mask over my face without a word, having me breathe in deeply.
It was like I blinked and everything was over. I felt myself waking slowly. My head felt foggy and my eyes had a hard time opening fully. I could tell my mind was still trying to fight the effects of the anesthesia. The warm small hand in my hand let me know my Rose was by my side. I squeezed her hand tightly as I continued to stir awake.
‘Lucas?’ Her sweet voice made me smile.
‘Mmm, my Rose. You didn’t leave me,’ words slid out of my mouth like a flowing faucet. ‘I was worried you might have changed your mind and ran for the hills.’
‘Never,’ she said so confidently.
‘Thank you, Rose.’ She shook her head no at me.
‘No, thank you, Lucas. You don’t know how happy you made me today.’ She smiled at me.
‘I wonder how you’ll feel when I ask you to move in with me in a couple of months?’ I winked at her, finally able to open my eyes fully, and take in her beautiful face. Her eyes widened on me before she blushed deeply.
‘Stop,’ she slapped my arm playfully.
‘Just wait and see, Rose.’
Rose kept me company all day. She skipped her classes and got her assignments emailed for the day. She worked on her homework and her classwork as she sat with me. I loved seeing her focus with the way she would suck her lips in when she was concentrating. Her brows would pinch at the center any time she would get confused, but it would soon unfurrow as she found her answer.
Leo stopped by again with Lisa, who seemed to be doing okay. I was still worried about her and the son of bitch that I still need to find. I hate that I can’t intimidate him now that I have this thick cast on. Lisa needs help. I love her to death, but she definitely has daddy issues, and it’s causing her to pick guys with large red flags. I hope she’s able to break this habit before it hurts her worse.
‘I still don’t understand it. Once you start mixing the alphabet with numbers, you’ve lost me,’ Lisa complained as she looked at Rose’s work quizzically.
‘That’s where you find me.’ Rose giggled as she took her work back from Lisa with a snatch of the paper.
‘She’s too smart for us,’ Leo added with a smile.
‘I’m sure Lucas wouldn’t be as lost as us.’ Lisa pointed out, knowing I actually enjoy math, and a challenge. She had Rose hand me the paper with her work. The problems were not simple, and way beyond my scope. I shook my head no.
‘Normally, math is my favorite, but even this is way too complicated for me,’ I frowned, sad I couldn’t help her with it.
‘I’ll teach you.’ She smiled, looking excited as she offered.
‘Go for it.’
Rose showed me how to work the problems with ease. I followed along fairly well, and it helped her in double checking her answers as she went through them again. She was absolutely perfect, and there’s no way I am letting her father keep her from graduating. I’ll find a way to convince her to stay and finish out school.
I’m not letting you drop out, Rose.
