(Present)
Stay away from Justin.
Two days and his roughly growled warning is still haunting me. I’ve never ran as fast as I did that afternoon once he opened the door. The stark possessiveness in his tone frazzled me so much, especially the foreign reaction it caused in my body. It left a wicked throb in my pussy and I fucking hated it.
He’s the last man I should lust after.
No. I don’t desire him.
It’s only because it’s been a while since I’ve been fucked. Been a while since I’ve been so close to any man, and that’s all this is. A case of horniness.
Maybe I should have a one-night stand. They aren’t messy, are they? I’m sure I can manage to sleep with a guy without going on a few dates first.
Then why not fuck Dash, a tiny voice taunts, and I take a deep breath.
Stop thinking about him. I mentally scold myself.
Besides, I’m mad at him for ordering me to stay away from his best friend as if he has any right. The underlying message is as flashy as his massive ego that if he can’t have me, nobody else can either.
I swear I was so utterly speechless when he accused me of seducing Justin.
And how dare he threaten to call my dad!
That was taking it too far. The only reason that kept me in his office was my job and the slight fear of him going forward with his threat. Knowing him, I knew he wasn’t bluffing.
It was a miracle and also my experience dealing with asshole clients that made me go through with the rest of my meeting. Once I shift into that headspace, hardly anything affects me. The project is actually good and will add a lot of value to my portfolio. The excitement outweighs my annoyance with the man himself.
I survived him once. I’ll do it again.
The loud ringing of my phone pulls me out of my musings as I sit in my home office. When my sister’s name flashes, my mood sours. She had texted me a couple of times but I ignored them, not wanting to talk. Until now, she felt resentment toward me; but now, it’s building in my chest.
I have lunch with my parents tomorrow and I’m dreading it like the plague. Knowing I can’t avoid Arya any longer before she notices, I pick up the call with a calming breath.
“Hey, Arya.”
“Bi-Bianca,” she stutters.
My fingers tighten around my phone when she sniffles, and my senses sharpen. “What happened, Arya? Where are you?” She sobs harder, making me worried, and I demand, “Talk to me, baby. Why are you crying?”
“Aryan br-broke up with me,” she replies, hiccups lacing every syllable.
My chest hurts at the pain in her voice, and I softly ask, “But why? I thought he loved you.”
“He does and that’s why he did it.”
“What do you mean? I don’t get it,” I pry, confused.
“After I talked to you that night, I realized how unfair I was to you.” I sit back in shock, not at all expecting that, and continue listening. “I can’t ask you to sacrifice your happiness for me by asking you to get married when you’re not ready. You deserve to find love whenever it may be.”
“Oh, sweetie. But I still don’t understand why you two broke up.”
“I told Aryan the same and we decided we’ll find another way to convince our parents. That’s why I was trying to reach you but you didn’t return my texts. Then today, Aryan came to my house and said we need to break up because our families will never agree. It’s best to part ways now than later when it’ll hurt worse.”
“Arya,” I mumble as a tear leaks down my cheek.
“I-I begged him to stay but he wouldn’t listen.” She cries harder as she speaks, “But he left anyways. I ca-can’t live without him, Bianca. I love him so much. You remember how I told you I wished to find my soulmate? Well, he’s the one, but I can’t even have h-him.”
At moments like these, I wonder why we ever let ourselves be vulnerable to one single person. To give them the power to dictate our happiness.
Even when it seems perfect, it always leads us to heartbreak.
Love is nothing but messy and painful, and I’m proven right once more. The only difference is I have the power to fix it this time. It will be so easy to let my sister wallow in hurt after she told me I no longer have to help her. I have the chance to walk away unscathed, yet I can’t. Because I’ll regret it like so many choices in my life.
Besides, she’s my little sister who I’ve held in my arms as a baby and vowed to protect and cherish, no matter what.
“Call Aryan and tell him he made a mistake,” I say, hiding the tremble in my voice. There’s nothing but silence for the longest seconds like my words shocked her or something.
“What!?” she whispers. “Why would I do that?”
“Because I’ve decided to get married, Ari.” Just like that, I seal my fate. “I was going to tell you after I talked to Dad tomorrow.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes. So talk to Aryan and tell him not to worry about our parents.”
“Oh my god!” she gasps and the happiness mixed with astonishment is evident in her tone. “Did you meet someone? Tell me it’s not because of me and that you genuinely want to get married, Bianca.”
“Of course, Arya,” I lie as numbness sinks in. The taste of it is like poison in my mouth. “Let’s just say your words gave me the push I needed.”
“You mean it?”
“Yes.” I sigh. “Now go win your soulmate back, baby sis.”
“Thank you! Thank you! Bee. I love you.”
“Love you back.”
I’m about to hang up when she yells, “But wait… you didn’t say if you’re seeing someone.”
The urge to say Dash’s name screams inside me but I hold myself back. I wish I could’ve gone with Iris’s plan because it would’ve solved everything. Maybe I should’ve tried harder to convince him, but it’s too late now.
“I’ll tell you everything once I’ve talked to Dad. Okay, Ari?”
“Fine. Maybe we can meet for dinner?”
I relax when she doesn’t push. I have a feeling it’s because she’s eager to call Aryan. “Yeah… Dinner sounds good. I’ll let you know. Bye.”
Once she hangs up, I drop the phone on the desk and fight the urge to scream. Or cry. Or disappear. I can’t pick, and instead sit with my head between my hands as I come to terms with the decision I’ve made. I console myself that I’ll be fine. Maybe if I say it enough, it might become true.
***
The crisp night air caresses my skin and sends a shiver down my naked back in the black minidress I’m wearing. I’m standing at the entrance of The Mirage. The gentlemen’s club I visited with Rosa the last time.
My mom always said that one should never make hasty decisions when angry or when emotions are all over the place. Like mine are tonight. Because they only lead to terrible regrets, and a burden like that is heavy to carry.
In spite of knowing it myself, I’m unable to stop as I’m about to make one more.
It’s not the only lesson I learned, though. Sometimes when you’ve lost one battle, you need to fight another to feel strong. It’s a human instinct to do so when you’re pushed into a corner, and I don’t know about others, but it’s always helped me.
I’m risking a lot coming here. A last bold attempt. If it goes like I hope, I might just come out winning.
Well, that’s if I’m allowed inside. Or my efforts to doll up will all be in vain.
I hand my keys to the valet before confidently striding toward the gates, even though deep inside I’m a nervous wreck. After the last time, I expect a security guard to appear at my side and ask me to leave or, worse, run into Nova who will surely tattle on me to Rosa.
Instead, I’m greeted politely by the guard as he opens the door, and I keep my expression neutral and confident like I have every right to be here. At a gentlemen’s club.
I channel my inner Rosa and boldly walk up to the bar and settle on a stool. When the bartender approaches, I order, “One gin and tonic please.”
Once he places the drink in front of me, I take a sip and let the alcohol burn down my throat. Warmth spreads through my body once it settles in my stomach. Sometimes a girl needs liquid courage, and I certainly do if I want to face Dash.
After the phone call with Arya, I could feel my walls closing in on me and panic rise inside my chest. I couldn’t stop picturing what my life will turn out to be like with a strange man who I’ll call my husband, with no way out. The claustrophobic feeling grew and I knew I had to try convincing Dash one last time.
Despite our mutual animosity, if he agrees, I trust him not to betray me. He may be threatening and arrogant, but I have a feeling he’s a man of his word.
I’m just praying he’s here tonight since it’s a Saturday and I can pretend to run into him. It would be so much easier if there was something he could get out of this too. So the fake arrangement is beneficial to us both. Sadly, there isn’t and that’s why this makes it so much harder.
Most men have the inner instinct to be a woman’s knight in shining armor. I saw it that night in Dash’s eyes when I came crying to him after breaking up with Niall. Maybe it’s still lying in a dark corner inside him and I can entice it to come out.
But if he asks me to beg—which he might, since he’s also an asshole now—I won’t do it.
There has to be a line where it becomes pathetic, and begging is it.
I stare at the wall and pray to the angels who’ll listen and send me a hint or a way to accomplish my plan.
“Is the drink that bad, beautiful?” says a voice I know all too well.
I turn and look up into Justin’s eyes as he hops onto the empty stool beside me. Of course, he’s here. Thank fuck! I at least didn’t run into him this time.
“My drink is fine,” I answer with a smile.
“Then why are you scowling at it?” he asks jokingly.
Huh. I didn’t realize I was thinking so hard. “I wasn’t.”
“If you say so, beautiful.”
He’s always in a cheery and flirty mood, it seems. Suddenly, I recall Dash’s words that it’s all a mask to hide his true feelings. If that’s true, then he’s a great actor. I wonder if it gets tiring to wear it all the time.
I’m the kind of person who wears her emotions on her sleeves. Sometimes, it can be a weakness when you don’t want the other person to know your hidden thoughts.
“So what brings you here tonight?” he questions curiously while pointing at the bartender. I watch as the bartender brings Justin his drink—a glass of expensive whiskey—like he’s done it many times. Hmm… Justin must come here a lot.
“Do you live here in the city?” I avoid his question by asking my own. He doesn’t miss it but lets it go to answer.
“No, I don’t,” he replies, sipping his drink. “I came to visit Dash and was supposed to leave last week, but my plans changed. I take it that the meeting went well since he hired you?”
“He told you?”
“Wasn’t he allowed to?” he queries.
“Nothing like that,” I utter. I’m wondering if Dash also mentioned his threat. “He doesn’t seem like the type who talks much, except to bark orders.”
He chuckles low and I shrug innocently. Shaking his head, he smirks as he agrees, “You’re right. The man is a workaholic, so it’s become second nature to him.”
“So I should expect him to be demanding and overbearing while we work together?”
“I’m afraid so, but something tells me you can handle him,” he muses before leaning slightly closer to me. “My turn to ask questions now, beautiful. Are you here to see him?”
My cheeks heat at the bluntness of his question and going by the satisfied grin on his face, he already knows the answer. His closeness has me thinking of Dash’s accusation followed by the threat he issued. However, when I accused him of being jealous, he denied it and taunted me instead.
Out of nowhere, an idea forms in my brain, which just might backfire on me if gone wrong. I also know my instincts have never steered me wrong. Except once. Besides, when your back is against the wall, you have nothing to lose.
Keeping my eyes pinned on a smug Justin, I slowly take a sip from my glass. Inching closer, I softly say, “Actually, I was hoping to see you.”
Justin looks stunned for the first time and I have to hide my smile. It doesn’t take him long to recover and the flirty expression brightens his blue eyes.
“Is that right?” he lowers his voice, running his tongue between his teeth. His tone indicates he knows I’m lying but he decides to play along.
I don’t care as long as it ends up in my favor. “Yes, and you wanna know why?”
His head tilts and he shrugs. “I won’t lie, I’m curious.”
“Because Dash threatened me to stay away from you,” I reveal while flipping my hair back. Finishing my drink, I boldly declare, “And no man tells me who I can and can’t date.”
“So you want to make him jealous?”
“No. I want to teach him a lesson that his threats don’t scare me.” Rising from my chair, I ask him, “So the question is, are you in or not, Justin?”
“It’s not even a question, beautiful.” He winks and stands up, grabbing my hand as he leads me inside to the main area. “In fact, I’m more than happy to.”
