My heart thumps in my throat every time I open a room in the hallway upstairs and they come empty or already occupied. Dash’s parting taunt replays in my head and I hate letting him get to me.
Niall would never cheat. Just last week, he said he loved me and apologized for being a shitty boyfriend. We went on a date and spent the whole week at my apartment since Rosa went home. It was perfect.
It has to be another one of Dash’s sick games. I saw the disappointment on his face when he found Niall and me together after the night of the club. This is his way of getting back at me.
Damn it. What am I doing?
I pause my hand on the last door open and intend on going back downstairs. I wouldn’t insult Niall for a single moment of doubt. Lowering my fingers, I back away and turn.
“Fuck yeah. Spread those legs, baby.”
I freeze in the dark hallway. It’s none other than Niall’s rough groan. For a second, I believe I’m hallucinating when he grunts again. I would recognize that voice anywhere. Everything happens in slow motion.
With shaking fingers, I shove the door and it makes a creaking noise, just like in horror movies. The sight that greets me is much worse. Nightmarish.
They don’t notice my presence. Or the sound of my heart breaking into pieces. Their moans as Niall fucks some random girl from behind are like cries of a witch; scratching and bleeding me.
Tears sting my eyes and I can’t hold them back. When the initial shock wears off, I slam the door against the wall and yell, “You asshole.”
My boyfriend’s—ex-boyfriend—head snaps at the loud bang and his eyes widen into saucers when they clash with mine. The girl moans about why he stopped while he blinks rapidly, expecting me to disappear.
“Bianca… baby,” he softly says, still inside her. She finally turns and makes no attempt to shove him off. She isn’t even regretting it and shrugs. I flick my gaze back to him and point in his direction.
“We’re over.”
I run and the tears I was holding back by a thread fall until I’m numb. Someone calls my name when I push through the bodies downstairs but I keep running, desperate to get away from here. Anywhere.
As if God recognizes my pain, electricity cackles in the sky and it begins to rain. And it’s not soft and slow. It’s lashing like a thunderstorm.
In an instant, I’m drenched. My hands shake around my phone as I book a cab. I don’t remember how long I stand shivering and soaking outside in the cold night until it arrives and I’m sliding into the back seat. I can’t remember telling the cab driver my address or how I ended up at Dash’s place, until I’m knocking at his bedroom door.
“Bianca.”
My blurry gaze collides with his handsome face as his lock on my tear-stained face. They stopped falling sometime during the ride. My eyelids close for a second as the image of Niall and the girl fills my vision and I know it will forever haunt me.
Suddenly, my anger returns full force. I gave him everything and he threw it all in my face. If he thinks I’m going to forgive him and cry, he’s dead wrong.
“Bianca.”
Awareness sinks in that I’m standing in a wet dress outside the room of my ex-boyfriend’s mortal enemy. He’s half naked and his black sweatpants hang low on his hips with that infamous V on display. His stormy eyes don’t soften, but grow darker and intense. That granite jaw of his clenches the longer I stay mute and my heart palpitates.
I really look at him, absorbing every single little detail, and give my body free rein to admire the expanse of his chest and eight-pack abs. Dash is all man with the broodiness and violence. All sharp angles and chiseled features. And I hate it even as shivers race down my skin, not from cold but him.
The bane of my existence.
His goddamn words came true.
And I just want to erase everything that’s happened tonight. I want to feel desired. Wanted. Loved. Even if it’s just for a night and by a man I should despise but can’t.
“Why are you here?” he literally growls.
He goes absolutely still when I press myself against his hard body. Apart from the thundering of our hearts and the rain pelting outside, the air is silent. His abs tighten when I softly graze the muscles with my fingertips and rise on my toes to kiss his neck. The silence stretches as seconds pass and he doesn’t react. He doesn’t even touch me.
Am I that undesirable?
Is there something wrong with me?
The tears return and I push off him, backing away. An involuntary sob spills off my lips and I whisper, “I-I’m s-sorry.”
I turn, only to be pulled back into a pair of strong arms. One hand wraps me in an embrace while the other tucks my head against a steady heartbeat. Ugly sobs keep coming as I cry and he doesn’t say a word, only holds me through it all, even as my tears soak him.
When the pain turns to a low throb, I meet his powerful gaze watching me tenderly. But I also need his hate, his angst that he reserves for me.
“Do you want me?” I demand, my voice low.
His fingers in my hair tighten and he grits, “Bianca.”
“Because I want you to be my first.”
“Bianca,” he sighs, letting me go, and runs his fingers through his hair. “I don’t deserve it. Don’t deserve you.”
“No, you don’t. But I’m giving it to you anyway.”
His chest heaves like he’s fighting for the control he’s losing. But when his resolve doesn’t crumble and he shakes his head, rejection stings me once again. “Go away.”
I flinch and stark pain flashes across his face. With a curse, he yanks me into his arms once more. I wrap my legs around his waist as he picks me up and slams my back against the wall. “You don’t know what you’re asking for, kitten. Because I’ll want everything. Every first.”
Nothing left to lose, I sell my soul to the sinful devil.
“Make love to me,” I rasp, resting my forehead on his. “Please.”
My plea has his eyes dropping to my lips and when he leans forward, I turn my head away. “No kissing.”
He freezes but then I feel his fingers push my hair away from my face and turn my cheek to him. He whispers softly, “Okay.”
Lowering me to my feet and without breaking our connection, his hand finds the zipper on the side of my dress. My chest caves when he slowly lowers it and even though he’s already seen me almost naked, this moment feels different. Once my dress and heels are gone and I stand bare before him, his gaze drops like he can’t resist.
They caress the tops of my breasts, my nipples that harden more under his attention, and stop between my thighs on my soaked panties. The urge to hide myself ignites but with one shake of his head, I clench my fingers on my sides.
“You’re too beautiful.” His voice is guttural while his features turn primal. “Every inch of you.”
Picking me up, he carries me toward his bed before laying me on my back. Every thought evaporates as I lean on my elbows and watch him push his sweatpants down until there’s nothing separating us.
My eyelashes flutter when he kneels and I gasp, feeling his palms graze my legs and trace upward. The simple touch makes me delirious and I hate how right it feels. It confuses me. I bite my lip when his fingers reach my waist and curl into my panties, pulling them until I’m completely naked.
My pussy was now on display for the forbidden man. I close my eyes, unable to handle the hunger in his eyes as they stare at me.
“No. You don’t get to hide, kitten.” He growls darkly. “Look at me.”
I shake my head, tightening my eyelids. My back arches when I feel his lips lay a soft kiss on my inner thigh and repeat the same gesture to the other side. He leaves no part of me untasted, soft kisses marking me until his breath flutters on my folds.
I hate how wet I am for him.
“Hide all you want, Bianca,” he rasps before promising, “but my name will be the only and last thought in your head long after I’ve claimed you.”
Without warning, he runs his tongue through my slit, parting my lips so he can lick between them. Deeper. Hungrier. My eyes fly open on a pleasurable moan.
Rough hands push and hold my hips down when I try to get away from the arousing sensations. He tastes me gently and reverently, like he has all the time in the world. Flicking my clit, he wraps his lips on my rosebud and sucks softly.
“Ahh…” I gasp as he slides one thick finger to the knuckle.
He stops pushing when he feels my barrier and plays with my clit to distract me from the slight discomfort. Minutes pass as he works me until a low throb begins in my lower belly. The ache intensifies, and I clench around him. Two fingers become three, stretching me.
“Good girl,” he praises. “Come for me. Ride my hand.”
His dirty command sends me over the edge. It’s more powerful than any orgasm I’ve ever had. Gentle hands cup my cheeks and push strands of hair away. When I blink my eyes open, Dash is leaning over me, his hard body enveloping mine in his warmth.
“Last chance, kitten.”
“Don’t stop,” I whisper while he waits. He looks at me the exact way I’ve desperately ached for Niall to do. It pains me that another man is giving me the things I yearned for.
His arm reaches into the side drawer and he sheathes himself in a condom. I grab the nape of his neck while he spreads my legs by cupping the back of my knee. My lips part when the crown of his cock rubs against my clit. His jaw hardens when he feels me become slick even more. Sliding his hand between our bodies, he runs his cockhead over my folds. Once. Twice. Thrice.
My nipples scrape against his chest as I dig my nails into his skin and scratch his back, silently begging him to end the agony. An empty ache builds in my core and I need him inside me.
“Please.”
“Say my name.”
I shake my head and he circles my entrance teasingly. “I hate you.”
“Say. My. Name, Bianca,” he demands in a deep voice.
A tear slips as I whisper, “Dash.”
He pushes inside and immediately, my body resists but he’s patient and plays with my clit until I relax. Slowly, he enters me and the feeling is strange and exhilarating at once. The slight burn only intensifying the feel of having him inside.
When he hits against the barrier, I murmur, “Dash.”
“You feel so good, kitten.” His voice strained.
His cock throbbing inside my walls and I can’t help but clench.
Pulling out until only the tip is inside, he thrusts inside but doesn’t stop until he pierces through my virginity in one deep thrust. I scream, feeling like I’m being ripped apart. It hurts so much. Soft kisses over my face pull me out of the haze of pain and I realize Dash has stilled inside, letting me adjust to his size.
“Breathe for me, kitten.”
“Dash.”
“Good girl,” he rasps. “The worst is over. Tell me when to move.”
His head dips as he tastes and peppers kisses over my skin that’s raised with goosebumps. His mouth, such a contrast to the slowly ebbing pain. I arch my back when his tongue flicks my nipple and I grab his hair, pressing his lips harder against me.
But he’s having none of it.
He sucks and pulls on my nub with his lips softly and teasingly. Tingles spread all over my body when his greedy fingers explore my curves possessively.
“Please move, Dash. I need… more.”
Wild eyes clash with mine and I feel his dick lengthen even more. I clench and he groans and rolls his hips so his groin leaves a delicious friction against my clit. He pulls out gently while watching my every reaction on my face. If I wince, he pauses and kisses my neck, the tops of my breasts until I sigh in pleasure. Then he enters me slowly.
“Ahh… yes.”
“So goddam tight.” He punctuates his words with another deep and slow thrust.
Love. He’s making love to me, claiming and erasing the bad memories until his name is all I can think of. Just like he promised.
“Let me kiss you, kitten,” he begs, his eyes latching on to my lips.
“No.”
His arm reaches above my head to grab the headboard and he gives another tortuously slow plunge. The corded muscles of his arm tightening like he’s fighting for control. I moan in pleasure, an ache rising in my belly and he does it again. My toes curl as I raise my hips to meet his with every downward thrust.
“Scream my name, Bianca.”
“Dash!”
“Who’s inside your wet cunt?”
“Dash.”
Letting go of the headboard, his weight presses against mine and I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him deeper. His thrusts become gentle and circling my neck, he demands, “Who’s making love to you?”
“You.”
Our breathing turns harsher and when he thumbs my clit without mercy, I shatter around him and he follows shortly after with a loud groan. His muscles flex when I try to push him off and his head rises from the crook of my neck.
“What are you doing, kitten?”
“Leaving.”
“It’s raining heavily.”
“I don’t care. I’ll find another cab,” I growl. “Move.”
In a flash, he wrenches my arms above my head, locking my wrists in one of his, and declares, “You’re not going anywhere.”
“Unless you’re planning to fuck me again, I’m not fucking staying.”
Darkness swarms his features and my belly flips. The Dash I know all too well returns with a vengeance. Smirking, he taunts, “I don’t fuck the same pussy twice. So you have two choices. You listen like a good girl and stay, or I fuck your virgin ass.”
He holds my defiant stare arrogantly, expecting me to choose the first. I call his bluff.
“Do it.” His smirk falters for a fraction of a second. “Fuck my ass, Dash. You had my virginity. Might as well steal another.”
I smile in victory when he lets my arm go and slides off the bed to stand at the edge. I only get to bask in my satisfaction before he flips me onto my stomach and slaps my ass. A stark contrast. As if he’s still expecting me to back down. When I don’t, he growls.
“As you wish, kitten.”
Shivers dance down my spine while my sore pussy becomes drenched at the anticipation of feeling him in my ass. Because damn him, I want it. I crave him. And he knows it.
A gasp spills from my lips when he yanks me to the edge and tilts my hips up. The move has my breasts pressing against the sheet and my ass and pussy on display. I don’t turn to peer at him, afraid he’ll witness the lust in my eyes.
“Last chance,” he repeats again.
“Fuck me, Dash.”
His breath teases my folds, wet with my juices and proof of my lost virginity.
He’s not going to…
My thought goes incomplete before it is answered in one long lick. I buck against Dash’s mouth as he eats my pussy, groaning like an animal tasting the proof of his ownership. My fingers fist the sheet below me as I grind against his tongue and fall apart.
And then I let him own me wholly.
Hours later, when I’m sated and spent, Dash murmurs in ear, “Stay here, kitten.”
The second his footsteps disappear and the bathroom door slams shut, I leave everything behind without a goodbye.
I lock his memory in a dark corner of my heart.
Never to be touched again.
