Age 23:
From: [email protected]
What are you wearing? So I can know whether I should walk away or not when I see you.
Just kidding, of course.
I wouldn’t walk.
I’d run.
Lily
***
Skipping down to Bessie with Nathan’s car keys, I prepped myself for meeting Shiny. Whether Shiny knew it or not, today would be the end of an era. A time when I so often used this outlet as an escape from reality. A place free of judgment. Just true and pure friendships. And I would miss that. A lot.
But a whole new era with Nathan was starting now. One door was closing and another was opening. One friendship was coming to an end and one relationship—one that had the potential to be forever—was beginning.
I think I’d love Nathan since the first time he kissed me. Well, really kissed me. And I felt this overwhelming peace about the whole thing. I wasn’t sure how wrapping things up with Shiny would go. And sure, I was a little concerned about how Luke would handle the news, but deep down, I knew it would be okay.
But first, Shiny.
Plugging my phone into Nathan’s car, I pulled up one of Rachel’s many playlists. This one was called “The Girls Who Get It, Get It.” It made me giggle every time. I don’t know how she found the time to make playlists for all of her friends, but it was absolutely precious.
I wasn’t supposed to meet Shiny at the park for another hour, but my anxiety was getting the best of me and I was ready to get the scary part of this meetup over with. So what better way to do that than meandering up and down the aisles of the nearest Target?
I hummed along to “Break My Stride” as I pulled out of our parking deck.
My hair was curled perfectly, a fun contrast to the rat’s nest it had looked like when Nathan walked into the kitchen this morning. That didn’t stop him from looking at me like I was a chocolate bon-bon he wanted to pop into his mouth.
I giggled to myself at the thought. He was insane. Insane for falling in love with me and insane because, even at my worst, he still saw me as beautiful.
Part of me was ready to meet Shiny so I could tell Nathan all about him. After that whole dream about Nathan being Shiny, it was a bit touchy for me. I’d needed time to process the meaning behind it. Now, though, I couldn’t wait.
I turned my left turn signal on and accelerated, the afternoon sun casting a warm glow over the interstate. The hum of engines and the rhythmic beat of music filled the air around me as I merged into the flow of traffic. The music momentarily hushed as a cheerful text alert chimed from my phone, nestled in the cup holder beside me. A playful smile tugged at my lips as I hoped for a message from Nathan, my heart dancing with anticipation.
With a sense of excitement, I leaned down to steal a glance at the phone, my fingers brushing against the smooth surface. The anticipation turned to surprise, then a hint of dread, as I saw the sender’s name: an email from Shiny. My heart fluttered in my chest, anxiety tightening its grip as I dipped my chin to read the ominous notification.
But before I could even open the email, the world around me transformed. A blinding flash of white filled my vision, accompanied by the screeching wail of tires on pavement, tearing through the music’s rhythm. Panic surged within me, instinctively causing my foot to slam onto the brakes, a desperate attempt to halt the impending collision. But time betrayed me, and the collision was inevitable.
The impact was a violent explosion of sound and sensation. The violent force of the collision rocked my car, sending shockwaves through the frame. My phone, once a source of excitement, was now an airborne missile, torn from its resting place and sent soaring. My body was thrust to the right, a helpless passenger in a chaotic symphony of crumpling metal and shattering glass.
Glass erupted around me like crystalline fireworks, the tinkling shards dancing in the air before cascading down like confetti. The airbags, those silent sentinels, erupted from their hidden chambers with a forceful embrace, enveloping me in a cloud of white dust. The acrid scent of burnt rubber mingled with the metallic tang of exposed metal, assaulting my senses.
As I struggled to make sense of the chaos, the world felt distant and distorted, like an ethereal dream. My ears rang, the clamor reminiscent of action scenes from movies, a discordant symphony of disorientation. A warm wetness trickled down my chin, drawing my attention downward. Trembling fingers reached up to touch the source, only to be met with a chilling reality. The tips of my fingers were stained red, the color vivid against my pale skin.
Time hung suspended in that moment, a tableau of shattered hopes and shattered glass. In the midst of the wreckage, my thoughts swirled like dust motes in the aftermath of a storm, a whirlwind of fear, pain, and confusion. And as the world slowly came back into focus, the taste of copper on my lips and the distant echo of sirens became my haunting companions.
Huh, that’s weird.
Nothing hurt. Why did nothing hurt?
The car was still in gear. I should put it in park. But my eyes felt so heavy. My arm dropped to my lap. Try as I might, I couldn’t reach for my phone. All I wanted was to call Nathan.
“Ma’am, are you okay?” The voice in my ear was frantic, but my heart rate felt so slow. Everything felt slow, like time was moving at half speed.
Shiny. I needed to tell Shiny. He would think I stood him up. He wouldn’t understand.
“Stay with me.”
I lifted my head and turned toward the voice, but tiny black dots formed in my vision, then quickly turned into bigger dots.
“Shiny,” I called out with a scratchy throat, my voice far away.
But as I said his name, all I could think of was Nathan.
And as an image of the man I loved flashed in my mind, the world went dark.
