TRINITY
The fact that I woke up in time to get breakfast cooked was a miracle. Although Huck and I hadn’t had sex again last night, we’d done many other things. He didn’t move when I got out of bed to go start breakfast. I caught myself smiling while thinking about all we had done, but would have to remind myself that I had to keep my feelings out of it. No attachments. I wasn’t worried that I’d fall in love with him. I still didn’t think I had that in me.
Trying to make up for not cooking the guys dinner, I made sure to make everyone’s favorite. Gage and Levi liked it when I made a large breakfast, but Huck always scowled. I was torn between doing what I normally did to make the majority happy or pleasing Huck.
He was the one who had stressed that this was just fucking. I had to remember that, and making decisions with that in mind meant I was making a big breakfast. It was what I would have done before we had sex. The only thing that I struggled with was, I liked when I pleased him and he praised me. The good girl thing was a weakness I had to work on. If I didn’t, this would be more difficult when it ended, but then I had to accept I would feel something for him. He was my first. Emotional attachments came with that. Right?
Gage walked in, grinning as he inhaled deeply. “Smells so fucking good,” he said as he grabbed a plate I had set on the end of the island. He surveyed the food I had laid out, then nodded his head approvingly. “You didn’t let me down.”
I was again thankful I’d woken up on my own this morning and not overslept.
“Food!” Levi called out as he entered the kitchen. “God, I love waking up here.”
At least I made them happy. I tried not to think about Huck’s reaction. I wasn’t even sure how Huck would treat me today. Would I get the hot or the cold Huck?
“Listen,” Levi said to me.
I looked at him with a serious expression.
“The Huck thing, when that stops—and it will—we want you here. Don’t go getting any ideas about leaving.”
I needed that reminder. The one about it ending. I had been telling myself the same thing, but having someone else confirm that this was a brief sexual thing with Huck kept me from getting my head somewhere it didn’t need to be.
I nodded. “Thanks.”
“I second that,” Gage said as he walked to the table with his food.
Now, if I wasn’t so nervous about Huck’s reaction to my breakfast buffet, things would be fine. I picked up a piece of bacon and ate it.
“There’s a fight on pay-per-view tonight,” Gage said from his spot at the table. “If I ask real nice, would you make one of those killer spreads of food for it?”
I finished chewing and swallowed. “Of course. That’s my job. You don’t have to ask real nice, but I appreciate it.”
The door from downstairs opened and closed. I walked over to get a cup down for Huck and pour him some coffee just so I had something to do other than look at him.
“If you bitch about the food, I will take you out back and kick your ass,” Gage said before Huck could say anything.
“It’ll be two against one,” Levi added.
I wished they’d be quiet and not make a big deal out of it. He might not even have said anything if they hadn’t pointed it out. Forcing a smile, I turned around with his cup. He was scanning the food. I waited on him to look at me. When he finally did, he wasn’t scowling, but he wasn’t smiling either. He simply gave me a nod and picked up a plate. Not the warmest reception, but I hadn’t expected him to come up to me and touch me or anything. This was sex, not affection.
Keeping the two separate would be hard. Affection was something I had craved most of my life, but was too afraid to get close enough to anyone who might give it to me. Until Hayes.
Huck put the same amount of food on his plate he always did. Three pieces of bacon, two biscuits, cheese grits, and scrambled eggs. Sometimes, he got a cinnamon roll, but today, he didn’t. When he finished filling his plate, I held out the cup of coffee for him. He took it without a word and went to the table.
This was a typical morning. Nothing different. Except my feelings were struggling.
Thank you, mind-blowing orgasms, for screwing me up.
Huck asked Gage about some transaction with a man I didn’t know. They fell into shop talk, and I put a few things on a plate, filled a cup of coffee, then made my way out to the back patio. It was warm already, but then it was late spring in Florida which was summer weather for the rest of the country. I tucked my legs under me and ate my second piece of bacon.
After cleaning today, I had to prepare for tonight, so that would keep me busy. I looked out over the pool and wondered if they’d use this area out here too. They hadn’t yet, but the warmer it got in the evenings, there was a possibility. I needed to ask Gage. If they were going to swim, then the towels needed restocking, and the outside bar needed to have ice. I should probably do an inventory on the liquor for out here too.
I finished my meal and stood up to go get things started. Huck was walking out the back door as I turned. Being alone with him after all we’d done last night made me suddenly feel shy. Something about the light of day and reality.
“I’m heading to the shop, and then I’m needed at the ranch. I might not make it back for the fight tonight,” he said, not moving to get closer to me.
“Okay,” I replied, holding my empty plate and cup.
He studied me for a minute. “You’re good then?”
No, Huck. Not even close.
I nodded. “I’m fine.”
“All right,” he replied, then turned and went back into the house.
That was painful. I could admit it. Really painful. But I could get over it. Think about other things. Not Huck.
I followed him inside the house and went to the sink and began putting away leftovers and cleaning up the mess from making breakfast. When I finished, I made a grocery list of items I needed. Gage walked into the kitchen while I was writing it all down.
“You good?” he asked me.
I clenched my teeth. Were they all going to ask me that? No, I wasn’t good. Stop asking me.
I nodded, then took the list and held it out to him. “I need these things for tonight. Are you planning on opening up the pool area? If so, we need to check the liquor cabinet. You might need to pick some more up along with beer for the bar out there.”
Gage took the list and tucked it into his pocket. “Yeah, we’ll have the lights on out back. Might as well use the pool. It’s time to start enjoying it. I’ll just grab everything, and if we don’t need it, then it’ll get used eventually.”
“Okay. Great,” I replied with a false smile and turned to head for the cleaning closet to get out what I needed to start.
“He’s my friend, and I’d kill for him. But you’re family now too. If you need anything, let me know.”
Gage’s words should have warmed me, but they only drove home the point that last night had been a onetime thing.
“Thanks,” I said, glancing back for only a moment before leaving the kitchen.
The day went by quickly. Cleaning had taken me several hours, and then preparing the pool area had taken another two hours. Once that was finished, I had the groceries I needed, thanks to Gage, and I threw myself into preparing food.
Levi and Gage both stopped by the kitchen to taste something I’d finished. Huck never came back, but then he had told me he probably wouldn’t. I didn’t think about it too much. Just every other five seconds. I was going to torture myself if I didn’t stop it.
“This looks fucking incredible,” Gage said, coming back in to look things over before people started to arrive.
I smiled, happy he was pleased. I’d needed a distraction today, and thankfully, this had provided it.
“Go get ready. Put on a swimsuit. You don’t like watching the fight, but you’ve worked all day. You need to enjoy the pool,” he told me.
My first thought was no. Huck had said I couldn’t wear a bikini in front of anyone. But that had been before. Before we’d had sex. Before he’d gotten it out of his system. Not to mention, he wasn’t even going to be here.
“You’re frowning,” Gage pointed out.
I shrugged. “Not sure if I am supposed to wear a swimsuit.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Because of Huck?”
I didn’t reply, but I knew the look on my face said it all.
“He’s not your keeper. Wear what the fuck you want.”
He was right. I wasn’t Huck’s. He wasn’t here.
“Okay,” I agreed.
Gage grinned and popped one of my homemade tortilla chips into his mouth. “Thatta girl,” he said.
Walking up to the bedroom, I hoped I was doing the right thing.
