Callum carried the intruders as he followed me to the greenhouse; the woman slung over his shoulder, and the demon dragging behind him. His anger made the hairs on my arms stand on end. His eyes bored into the back of my skull, as if he could burrow into my brain and find the answers he sought.
I didn’t have an answer; at least not one he’d be satisfied with. Juniper was an enemy, a threat. In his mind, there was only one way to deal with the enemies.
When I reached the foot of the great tree, I turned to him and said, “Leave them here with me. Let me talk to them.”
He set Juniper down slowly. A muscle in his jaw ticked as he said, “I’m not leaving you alone with a demon. You can punish me later for disobeying you; I don’t fucking care. I’m not leaving him with you.”
“Fine. Just don’t hurt him.”
He looked confused, angry. His breathing became faster and sharper. “You shouldn’t be alone with her either. She came here to harm you, Everly.”
“We’ve taken her weapons, Callum. I’m safe in the house, and Darragh is watching.”
He scoffed. “Darragh. As if that —” He shook his head. “At the least, take the demon’s name. Give yourself a little more protection.”
He sounded disgusted, and guilt bubbled inside me like a boiling pot. Part of me wanted to apologize, but for what? I’d done nothing wrong, even though he was frustrated, even though he didn’t understand.
But I refused to perpetuate the harm my father had already inflicted on Juniper. I wouldn’t carry on his legacy.
“I don’t know how.”
Callum’s face softened, and he looked away from me before he knelt down and grasped the demon’s wrists in his own.
“Come over to his side,” he said. “Lay your palms against his chest, over his heart.”
Crouching, I did as Callum said, but I couldn’t bear to look at him as I did. I hated this feeling, this roiling tension.
He’d almost killed Juniper right in front of me. I didn’t think he would stop, even though I ordered him to, even though I begged him. I’d felt powerless. Again. Helpless to the forces around me, unable to fight back against the will of others. Just like when I watched my parents cut Juniper, ignoring her cries in that dim, drafty church.
My fingers tingled, numb as cold panic swirled in my stomach.
Callum’s hand came to rest gently on top of mine.
“Don’t be afraid,” he said. “I’m frustrated because I don’t understand. I feel your frustration too. Now is not the time for a deeper discussion, but I assure you, I am no less yours than I was an hour ago.”
My eyes stung with tears. But his assurance gave me the confidence to proceed. The demon’s heart beat against my palm, slow and steady, and I focused on it like I would the ticking of a metronome. Glowing threads in a myriad of colors appeared behind my closed eyes, and I unraveled them like a ball of yarn. They took shape slowly, forming a sigil made of jagged lines.
“Zane,” I whispered, and the demon twitched. Callum instantly tightened his hold on him, but the other demon didn’t open his eyes.
His sigil stood out starkly in my mind. Part of me felt proud for having accomplished something new. But another part felt as if I’d crossed a boundary. I’d invaded a place where I wasn’t welcome.
Callum got to his feet, dragging the demon up over his shoulder.
“If you need me, call,” he said. His voice was strained, his mouth drawn down as he glared at Juniper. “I’ll be listening.”
Then he disappeared with a whisp of smoke.
Taking off my sweater, I folded it up and placed it beneath Juniper’s head. Her head felt so heavy in my hand, and when I drew away, blood stained my fingers.
After all these years, she remembered me. She felt such hatred that she pursued me here, bringing weapons, a demon…
Callum was right. She meant me harm, she wanted to kill me.
“Why did you come here?” I wrung my hands as I paced in despair. “Why couldn’t you just leave me alone?” My throat was swollen with panic, and I choked on my words, sinking into a nearby chair. “I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”
A soft scent filled the air. When I looked up, a porcelain cup had appeared on the table beside me, filled with steaming tea. Although I couldn’t hear her without a radio nearby, I could feel my grandmother’s presence, warm and soothing.
“I don’t know what to do,” I whispered. “I don’t know what I can say.”
Juniper had come back to Abelaum to enact her revenge. Anger hung around her like a cloud; even unconscious, her bloodlust clung to her with undeniable fierceness. Her life had been destroyed thanks to my family. Only my mother’s guilt-ridden betrayal of the Libiri had saved her. But that didn’t erase what had happened. It didn’t undo the harm.
She deserved her vengeance. Perhaps that meant I deserved to die.
Callum would have a fit if he could have heard me thinking that way.
From deep within the house, I could hear the piano playing. Its tune was light, soothing, intertwining with the birdsong around me. The house was trying to calm me, giving me a gentle song to guide me. Callum’s answer to this was violence, and I didn’t blame him for that. But maybe I could choose another way.
Juniper stirred, and tension shot up my spine. She groaned as she tried to raise her head, and I said quickly, “Be careful. He was rough with you.”
She went still, her eyes widening as she slowly turned them toward me. Her expression was hard, guarded. Her gaze moved over me like a cornered wolf, trying to decide whether she could bite or flee.
“Everly Hadleigh?” Her voice was husky, deeper than when I’d last heard her speak. It gave me a sudden vision of long nights spent in desolate bars, the smell of cigarettes heavy in the air and the taste of whisky on my tongue.
“Everly Laverne, please.” My hand shook as I sipped my tea, struggling to maintain eye contact with her. “My father never wanted me to have his name anyway.”
Fury rolled off her in a wave as she snapped, “Where’s my demon? Where the hell is he?”
“With Callum. He’s alive. Callum won’t allow him near me, so…”
“What the fuck is a Callum?” She got to her feet, her face contorting with pain. Regret that I’d sent Callum away suddenly seized me as I stared at her. She wasn’t quite as tall as me, but she was muscular, and her hands were balled into fists.
My fingertips tingled as they grew warm, my arms itching as fire flowed through my veins.
“He’s my demon,” I finally said. “He’s the guardian of this place. Of…me. I didn’t mean for him to be so rough with you. With either of you. But your demon…Zane…he’s fine. I mean…they heal quickly.”
“Don’t you fucking talk about him like it’s not a big deal that your demon bashed his fucking face in.”
Unbidden heat flared in my chest.
“Did you come here to kill me, Juniper Kynes?”
Her answer was obvious before she spoke. Her anger shimmered around her in a red haze. There was a pulse in the air that I could feel in my chest, shocking me with its fury.
In quick, unbidden glimpses, I saw visions of her life. Handfuls of pills and bottles of liquor. Tattoos to cover the scars on her chest. Her brother’s pale corpse, wrapped in a sheet. Blood on her hands.
She avoided my question. Instead, she said, “You remember me. You looked terrified when you saw me in Abelaum. You looked like you’d seen a ghost.”
A ghost of my past. The specter of my guilt. I said, more to myself than to her, “Memories are far more frightening than ghosts.”
Her anger was justified. I envied her for having it, for being furious instead of frightened.
She glared at me. “You want to talk about scary memories? We share one: you, me…and your mother. Is she here? Is Heidi Laverne here?”
She yelled, as if hoping my mother would hear her. The red cloud of anger around her grew deeper, darker.
Maybe the truth would comfort her.
“My mother is dead,” I said. “Her mistakes…I can’t apologize for her. An apology probably isn’t even what you want to hear. She regretted everything. She tried to make things right.”
“She tried to make things right?” She shook her head, lip curling in disgust as she charged toward me. “What have you done to make things right, Everly? You were there too, hiding in the shadows like a fucking coward!”
She lunged, but she didn’t get far. Dangling vines snapped toward her, coiling around her arm and pulling her back. It wasn’t my doing; Darragh was watching.
The plants rustled. Even the great tree creaked and groaned. A breeze whispered through my hair, and Darragh said softly, “Say the word, and I’ll strangle her, my lady. You don’t need to lift a finger.”
“Please don’t be violent.” My hands shook as I grasped my teacup, but I couldn’t make myself drink. My stomach was churning. My skin was on fire.
Juniper yelled, “Don’t be violent? Don’t be violent? You listened to me scream for help and did nothing! Was it fun for you, Everly? Did it make you happy to see some innocent girl suffer for your God? Did you —”
“I don’t serve that God!”
Magic exploded from me in a wave as I raised my voice. One of the greenhouse’s glass panes shattered, shards raining down like glittering rain.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I attempted to regulate my breathing. Somehow, I needed to convince Juniper that I wasn’t her enemy, and losing control wasn’t going to accomplish that. If only she would stop talking, stop blaming me, stop blaming my mother…
But she was right.
I couldn’t change the past, I couldn’t undo the evil my family had inflicted on her. But I also couldn’t give her the justice she wanted.
My voice sounded so far away as I said, “I can’t make it right. I was supposed to be inspired, that’s what they told me. I was supposed to witness something beautiful and be left in awe of God’s power.”
I’d been petrified as I watched, all my horrified emotions locked up tight. That was the day I lost faith, the day blasphemy took root in my heart.
“All I saw was torture.” I was still unable to meet her eyes, although I could feel her glaring at me. “There wasn’t a day I could look at my mother after that and not see it. But she’s dead. And I am not my mother.”
“But you are your father’s daughter.”
Part of me wanted to laugh. Another wanted to weep. My vision was tunneling, my head throbbing. The magic pent up within me was making my skin itch as my emotions grew more erratic.
“He didn’t raise me like them. He raised me, but not like them.” Not like Victoria and Jeremiah. Not like the children he wanted. I was the extra child, the leftover, the mistake.
When I spoke, my voice didn’t shake. “He was clear, always, that I was not the daughter he wanted; I was only the one he needed. I wish I could change it. I wish I hadn’t been afraid. I wish I hadn’t spent so many years afraid.”
The teacup exploded. The noise startled me, and even Juniper flinched in surprise. We both stared in silence at the broken porcelain until, finally, I lifted my head and met her eyes.
She was looking at me differently now. As if she finally saw something she could understand. Something to connect us.
“What are you going to do, Everly?” she said. “Turn your demon on me? Or kill me yourself?”
I didn’t have the right words to say. An apology wasn’t enough. Excuses were a waste of breath, and she deserved better than that anyway.
Slowly, desperately, I said, “I don’t want you dead, Juniper. I need you alive. I need you to finish what you set out to do.”
