Starbeam: Chapter 17

Days passed and Al didn’t stop bugging me about this dragon thing. But he had so many plans and didn’t hesitate one second about sharing them.

The school was one of the most brilliant ones he had.

He told us about it around the campfire at night, to the children before bedtime, and they were so excited.

A part of me missed Goran, but another part not as much as I was falling harder each day for Albert.

I hated the magic kernels. I wished I could tell him who I was. I couldn’t stop thinking about that night either. But then mother’s warning of what would happen when all this was over jumped into my head.

I would get hurt as no prince ever married a commoner.

Prince Louis learned that the hard way when King Alexander discovered that his first love was a dragon.

They beheaded her and he was forced to marry another.

It ruined him.

I didn’t want that for Albert or myself.

So keeping Katherine a secret for as long as I could was still my first priority.

The next day a silver dragon flew in hard.

The ground shook when she landed and when she changed back it was Connie.

She ran straight into Albert’s arms and kissed him feverishly. I didn’t like it and I was glad that the men around me took it to have a different meaning.

They started to laugh and I had to push my tears aside and play along, smiling with them.

“Am I missing something here?”

“It’s Issy’s twin.” Helmut said. “Constance.”

“I met her before at the base camp when she healed all of our injured soldiers. Dragons attacked…” I looked at the men and smiled. “I’m sure you know about that already.”

They laughed as I sneaked a peek at Connie and Al.

He was with a dragon. What about Drizelda?

I wanted to throw her back in his face. He was betrothed to her and if Drizelda didn’t mean anything to him, what were the chances that I did.

“Andrew,” Albert’s voice was right next to me with Issy’s twin in his arm. “I want you to meet Connie, or Constance.”

“We already met, Al. At the base camp Bill and I went to.”

“I forgot, sorry.”

We both laughed.

“It looks like Goran isn’t the only one with deep admiration for you, Andrew.”

I huffed as Albert smiled. “What can I say. He kicked my royal butt at archery.”

Connie laughed. “Oh Al, that must have been so hard on you.”

“There is nothing wrong with healthy competition, Connie.”

“I’m sure that is what you tell yourself at night.” Connie teased which had us all laughing, well, I was pretending as my heart was busy breaking just slightly.

“Connie,” Issy’s voice came from the log house. She ran to her sister and hugged her tightly. “I missed you so much.” She spoke softly to her twin. “What is new, what is happening at Eikenborough.”

“You were in Eikenborough.” Al asked the question I wanted to.

“Yes, the need is bad there Al.”

I looked at his face, he didn’t smile anymore. He was worried, which lifted my heart slightly.

“I have news too.” She sounded grave, which had me on alert. “But we should speak in private.”

“Just tell me Connie.”

She looked at all of us. “Please, in private.” She begged again.

What news could she possibly have and now we wouldn’t even hear it as Al just nodded.

I watched them leaving for the log house.

The kids were playing outside.

Helmut slapped Emanual on the chest and he closed his eyes.

I squinted.

“Dragons can hear exceptionally far.” Helmut whispered and my gaze snapped toward Emanual.

We all fell super quiet and Emanual shut his eyes tighter.

“What is it?” Helmut whispered.

A scream came from the log house. Al? What the hell had Constance told him?

Helmut got up and went to them. Followed by Caleb.

“She didn’t make it.”

“Who didn’t make it?” I asked.

“He didn’t tell you about his mystery girl?” Emanual asked.

“What?” I sounded harsh. “Sorry, I’m confused.”

“It’s a confusing tale.”

He is crying because that wretched dragon told him, what? I was dead.

“Constance, tell me.” Albert demanded from the log house loud enough for all of us to hear.

She stormed out from the log house and Helmut and Caleb came back.

I knew why she was lying. She wanted him all to herself. He must have told her about the ball. What did she tell him? How could she possibly even know what had happened to me?

I didn’t like her. How could she put him through that.

He followed her with tears streaming down his cheeks. “Please,” he pulled her back. “Just tell me how she died.”

“I’m not going to do that, Al. You will only blame yourself.”

He grunted at her and stormed into the forest with Helmut and Caleb after him.

“So you found her?” Emanual asked as Connie sat on one of the logs looking guilty. Tears glistening in her eyes.

“I found the girl who won the lottery to that ball in Eikenborough.”

Maggy? Maggy was still alive.

“She told me that she’s dead.”

What? Maggy would never, unless she assumed, which sounds just like Maggy. She must know telling them that I fought in my father’s place in this war would get me killed. That would be the easiest explanation, but why did she tell Albert she didn’t want to give more details? Because she didn’t know any.

She could’ve just told him she didn’t know.

Maggy, you idiot. So little faith in me.

I should feel glad that he was really having these feelings for me, but I wasn’t glad to see him breaking down like this.

For crying out loud, he hadn’t even seen my face. What if he didn’t even like what he saw.

But I knew what he was going through. I was miserable for months thinking he was dead.

I didn’t know if I could go through months with him thinking I was.

“You got her name at least.” Emanual asked.

“Katherine. That’s all the girl was willing to tell me.”

Maggy was still alive. My best friend in this whole world was still alive.

Maybe just maybe my family…no, you can’t hope like that.

Hope like that doesn’t exist.

I didn’t see Al, Helmut or Caleb for the rest of the day, not even that night.

I helped with the dishes when Connie threw a little tantrum.

“Constance!” Issy said.

“For crying out loud, he only discovered her name today. He doesn’t even know what she looks like.”

“He shared a real connection with her, Connie.”

“He should’ve known better, she was a commoner.”

“Excuse me. It doesn’t make you better than her. You are just jealous, that is all. Is this girl really even dead?”

“Yes,” Connie yelled. “You think so little of me.”

She wasn’t dead, she was just not a girl at this moment.

“Then how did she die?”

“I can’t tell you that.”

“Constance!” Issy warned.

“There are too many ears here.”

“Oh please, Andrew has his own shit to worry about.”

“What shit?”

She sighed. “The bond we were told as kids, the myth,” Issy said.

I didn’t see what Constance did with her head.

“It’s real. Emanual’s grandfather saw it with his own eyes.”

“Bonds like that aren’t natural.”

“Oh, I agree,” I finally said, still pissed off with this Silver Annex for lying through her teeth.

“Emanual thinks Andrew is sharing one with Tanya.”

“The Green-Vapor?”

“She is hostile towards him without a reason.”

My eyes landed on Constance. “Anyone ask him?” She sounded hostile too.

“Ask me what,” I retaliated.

“You’ve never met her before. She is Chromatic. You might want to be a dragon slayer for all we know.”

“Constance, what has gotten into you?”

“If only it was that easy. No, I’ve never seen her before in my entire life, and for your information, I was keeping my distance as far from them as I could. I’m not like Albert, but I’m no monster either.”

“There could be other reasons,” Connie said.

“Like what?” Issy asked, clearly annoyed at her twin.

“I don’t know. Maybe she is attracted to him and that is pissing her off.”

“Or maybe she feels something she can’t explain with him. A dragon always knows.”

“What is that supposed to mean.”

“You know what that means, Issy.”

“Oh for crying out loud, it’s Bob. He actually is going to kill this one if he comes back and finds out this ludicrous tale you all are coming up with. He will not like it and he is never going to see you in that way Issy. Whatever you feel for Bob, it’s not mutual.”

Connie stormed out.

“And neither is Al’s feelings for you.” Issy yelled and my lips tugged softly as Issy growled.

“Sorry,” she said and grabbed another plate to dry. “She just infuriates me at times.”

“You really think your sister would tell Al that she was dead if she wasn’t?”

“No, she isn’t cruel. Jealous yes, but she would never say something like that just to get her way. There is something she isn’t telling us though. Sorry for what she implied.”

“Don’t worry, she wouldn’t be the first woman at this camp hating my guts.”

Issy laughed. “You know she doesn’t hate you Andrew. She just doesn’t want it.”

“And neither do I.”

“She is one lucky dragon but if that bond is real, something will happen. It’s not something you can run away from Andrew.”

I didn’t like that, not one bit.

“So you and Bob.”

She grunted again and covered her face with her hands. “It’s a hopeless case.”

“Not that hopeless. You are kind, Tanya isn’t, or in my opinion.”

“He is Chromatic, I’m not.”

“You are a dragon. Not human.”

“It’s not that different to be honest. They hate our guts too.”

I squinted. “They do.”

“Because we love humans, they hate our guts for that. To be honest when Al came up with this stupid idea, I never even thought we would get to this stage, but here we are.”

“You have known him for a long time, haven’t you?”

She nodded. “Our mother and father are in King Louis’ Royal Council. My father is a Swallow Annex too. We practically grew up with Albert.”

“I see. So he’s really hard up on this girl, huh.”

“Love at first sight. The way Al talks about that night is magical, which I guess we will never hear about it again.”

I nodded solemnly.

“Bob has been trying for years to find her, at least he knows her name now.”

“Not that it will help now that she is dead.”

“Sad but true. Just give him space for a few days please.”

I nodded and we finished the dishes in silence.

I was spent. Took all my frustrations out on a tree while Helmut and Caleb waited patiently.

Constance refused to tell me how my lady, how Katherine had died.

My heart was shattered.

So what if I had no idea what she looked like.

That night was perfect, magical, she hated my guts and I had no idea how she felt about me after that and now, now I would never know because she was dead.

Bob could find her friend. I know Constance would tell me at least what this woman’s name was that knew Katherine.

I would strangle a name out of Constance if I needed to.

I needed to know how she passed away, even if that was the last thing I did.

“Al,” Helmut said. “Do you think Connie might have just said that because of how she feels about you.”

“No, Helmut, Constance would never do that. We live in an imperfect world, that is it. But I knew she was the one for me.”

I sighed, Helmut and Caleb too.

“Let’s be honest here for a second, Al. I know you felt something deep with this girl.” Caleb said. “But would your dad really step aside this time.”

“He loved a dragon, Caleb. He would see the same love in my eyes. I know he could relate to that. Drizelda is nothing compared to Katherine.”

Katherine. She even had a royal name. “She loves her people like I love Chromatics. I wanted to be a better person after my brief encounter with her and the best part was that it felt as if I was. She was that powerful and I didn’t care how I felt about commoners, I was wrong. I didn’t even get a chance to tell her that.”

“She knew that Al, if she passed away she truly did.” Helmut said.

“I need to know what happened. I need a grave, Helmut.”

He sighed again. “Al, what if she was a dog.”

Caleb started to laugh and I wanted to punch Helmut in the face.

I growled at them instead and got up.

“C’mon Al,” they both yelled as I stormed back to the camp. They both followed me. I wished they would piss off.

“You only saw sad grey eyes, and beautiful lips. She could seriously have been hideous underneath that mask.”

“Then she was a fucking dog, Helmut.” I roared. “I don’t care.”

“Okay, sorry. The connection was real. I just wanted to make sure that you cry for the real deal and not what you made up in your head. Sorry.”

“I didn’t make things up. Her soul spoke to mine.”

“You do know what you sound like, right.”

“I don’t care!” I yelled again. “She is dead and you both are acting like idiots. Just leave me alone.”

I stormed to my tree and would stay there until it was time to fight again, and hopefully I would die in this war so that I could finally be with her.

My body shook with silent sobs. My lady was gone. She wasn’t in this world anymore.

Issy scolded Helmut and Caleb when they got back. There was talk about how inconsiderate they were to Al’s feelings about me. It was still so hard to accept.

I wanted to laugh from joy as he truly did feel the connection I had had that night, but I didn’t like him being this unhappy and sad. I wasn’t dead, I was right under his nose and he had no idea.

“It was real to him, I don’t care what he sounds like. The day is going to come Helmut when you are going to lose your head over a girl the way he did and I hope she gives you the cold shoulder.”

“Issy,” Helmut sounded shocked and I chuckled.

“You didn’t hear him, shut up.” Helmut joked playfully. “I’m not made for that mushy talk.” He shivered.

“Still, Issy has a point. I heard it’s pretty bad when you meet the one.”

“If I were you,” Caleb said. “I would shush as you could be the dragon’s lover.”

“Oh shut up, she is not my type.” I growled and the banter stopped.

We sat and talked about the intel that Goran got back via men that scouted our perimeters. They really had smart tactics and I could see that all three of them had grown up around war discussions, probably had tutors that taught them how to start a war and how to end one.

I went to bed early and thought about that ball.

It was magical but for him to be so down just by rumors that I could possibly be dead was hard to witness. It was just one night. We didn’t grow up together, we had nothing in common and to be honest, it made me nervous for the day he was going to discover who I truly was.

He knew my name.

I sighed at just how hopeless this was. I should’ve walked out that day when he came to pay off Drizelda’s debt. At least we could’ve met for real, but then maybe this would’ve been harder or maybe it wouldn’t. I wasn’t as beautiful as Maggy or as spontaneous as Fallon. I was difficult when it came to the opposite sex and only could relate to them through Andrew.

I should just try to forget about Albert in that way and let him believe that I was dead. That would be the best for both our hearts