Helen spent the next few hours alternately listening to the details of her father’s trip and insisting that Lucas was not her boyfriend. She figured out pretty fast that the only way to get Jerry to stop asking questions about Lucas was to ask him questions about Kate instead. And besides, she genuinely wanted to know what was going on between the two of them. Jerry kept insisting that they had never been anything more than friends. Disappointed that her dad was obviously still lugging around a big bag of hurt for her mother, all Helen wanted was to escape upstairs to her room to think, but she had to wait until they finished dinner first. By the time she and her father were done eating, arguing over how much salt he was allowed to put on his dinner, and talking about the store, Helen was so exhausted she nearly fell asleep sitting on the edge of the tub as she brushed her teeth.
The next morning, Helen skipped breakfast, packed her own lunch box, and shouted good-bye to her father from the front door before he even made it downstairs. He called after her as she jumped into Lucas’s car, but she pretended she didn’t hear him.
“Shouldn’t we wait to see what he wants?” Lucas asked her.
“Nope. Let’s just go,” she said a little too quickly.
Lucas shrugged and drove off as Jerry made it to the front door. Helen waved to him, but she knew she would hear about this little stunt later. In detail.
“Okay, I’m still new around here so I don’t know the cafés. Where’s a good place on this side of the island?” Lucas asked.
“Ah, the News Store?” Helen offered with a shrug. “I don’t think we’ll be able to talk there, though.”
“How ’bout this,” he said as he pulled into a chain restaurant that was popular with the tourists.
Helen winced but assented. There were other mom-and-pop choices, but she knew all the people who worked in those places. For this conversation she needed a little privacy.
They stood quietly together in line, waiting to sit before they started talking. Helen tried not to stare at Lucas, but it was difficult. It amazed her how comfortable he seemed wherever he went, as if the whole world was as private to him as his own bedroom.
She tried to watch him out of the corner of her eye, maybe catch him fidgeting or shuffling his feet the way she herself did in public, but there was none of that. He really didn’t care if people looked at him or not. He didn’t subconsciously apologize to the world for his presence by slouching or crossing his arms or playing with his keys. It unnerved Helen to see how he could just stand there and not do anything else, but it also inspired her. Why should she slouch and feel bashful for taking up more space than most people? She stood up a little straighter while she stared at him.
“Had enough?” he asked, smiling at Helen’s brazen admiration of his looks.
“Not yet,” she said, a matching smile breaking across her face.
“Good.”
As soon as they were seated, Lucas asked her what she wanted to know, and Helen had to think for a moment. She wasn’t entirely sure.
“I guess the first thing I need to know is who hurt Kate,” she said, dreading the answer.
“We have no idea,” he answered, sounding earnest. Helen’s heart sank. She knew from the night before that although Lucas couldn’t bear to be lied to, it didn’t stop him from telling a few whoppers of his own.
“That doesn’t make sense, Lucas,” she said carefully. “Your father told me that I was the only one of . . . our kind . . . who was not a member of your House. How can you not know two women who, by that logic, are related to you?”
Lucas nodded, like he understood why Helen doubted him. “The House of Thebes is very large. Our immediate family—those of us who moved back here to the States—are a just a tiny splinter group, but the main part of the House of Thebes is much, much larger. They’re known as the Hundred Cousins, although there are a lot more of them than that now, and they’re loosely led by my uncle Tantalus,” he said, looking down at his coffee, his eyes far away. “My dad knows everyone in our House on sight, but I don’t, and he wasn’t there when you were attacked. Helen, I’ve got so many cousins, there are some I’ve never even heard of, let alone seen.”
“If your uncle is the leader, can’t you just call and ask him which of your cousins is trying to kill me?”
“Tantalus may have been the one who sent them,” he said darkly. “But we don’t know that for sure yet. My uncle Pallas—Hector, Jason, and Ariadne’s father—he went back to Europe after the first attack on you to see how much Tantalus knows.” Helen studied his face for a moment. It was all sharp edges and glittering blue eyes.
“You mean spy on the rest of the House,” Helen said, surprised. He nodded. “But why would your family go through so much for me? I’m grateful, but still. What else aren’t you telling me?”
He tore at his croissant for a moment and then let out a fast breath.
“The Hundred Cousins are a kind of cult. They believe something that my family doesn’t, and they believe it so fanatically that they are willing to kill for it. That’s why we left Spain. Hector . . .” Lucas trailed off, and then shook his head as if to clear it before turning his focus back on Helen. “The point is that you’re in a lot of danger. I’ve been following you since I first saw you, but I can’t guard you every second. If either one of those women finds you without me there, they’ll try to kill you, and you don’t know how to defend yourself yet.”
“Well, it’s not like I’ve ever had to defend myself,” Helen said, at a loss. “I mean, this is Nantucket. My dad and I forget to lock the front door more often than not!”
“You’re very important to us. Much more than I can explain to you right now,” Lucas said, leaning forward and taking her hands. “I know you said you needed a few days, and I didn’t want to freak you out by throwing all of this at you at once, but you have to start training with us as soon as you can. My family will teach you how to fight.”
“You mean like judo and stuff?”
“Sort of,” Lucas said, smiling reassuringly. “Don’t look so worried. With your gifts you’ll be kicking ass in no time.”
“What gifts?” Helen asked doubtfully.
“You really don’t know, do you?” he marveled.
“Hey, Luke, what’s up?” Zach asked, entering the café. He was smiling, but his smile faded as soon as he saw whom Lucas was with. Behind him stood a few guys from the football team, all of whom were staring, openmouthed, at the unlikely pairing.
“Hey, Zach. Getting some coffee. You?” Lucas answered, totally unfazed. Helen gave a watered-down smile and untucked her hair from behind her ears to hide her face. Lucas reached across the table and smoothed her hair back behind her shoulder.
“Same, yeah,” Zach mumbled as he nearly tripped over himself to get away, his eyes darting between Helen and Lucas with disbelief. “See you in a few,” he called out before joining the other guys in line.
Helen bit her lip and stared at her coffee cup, rubbing her stomach under the table as subtly as possible. Please, no cramps, she thought.
“What’s the matter?” Lucas asked, watching her.
“Nothing. Can we just go?” she pleaded, desperate to change the subject, get away, maybe drop dead if at all possible.
“Sure,” Lucas said, standing up. He gave her a worried look. “I know it’s not nothing, Helen, and I’d rather you told me the truth, whatever it is. Ariadne gave all three of us guys a whole lecture about women’s troubles years ago, you know. And by lecture, I mean beating.”
“Well, I owe her one, but it’s not what you think.” Helen grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the door.
Lucas waved to Zach on his way out. Zach waved back, but he was still pouting.
“I think I’ve lowered your rank. Sorry,” Helen said as they got in the little silver Mercedes.
“What are you talking about?” Lucas asked, backing out of the parking lot.
“Well, Zach and all those guys saw us together,” she said, like her meaning was obvious.
“And?”
“Zach and Gretchen aren’t my biggest fans, which makes me sort of like popularity antimatter at school,” Helen explained sheepishly. Lucas’s face cracked into a huge smile and he grabbed her hand, but he had to let it go to shift.
“I’m going to have to start driving an automatic,” he mumbled to himself before continuing. “You think you’re unpopular? The first hour I was on this island I heard about the beautiful, perfect, heavenly Helen Hamilton. You know that’s what the boys call you, right? Heaven Hamilton?” Helen dodged his seeking hand, but he eventually captured hers and held it tighter.
“Stop it, Lucas. This isn’t a joke to me. And what’s up with this?” she asked, holding up their linked hands.
“I don’t know,” he said with a curious tilt of his head. “But it feels right, doesn’t it? Look, why don’t you tell me what’s really bothering you about being seen with me. Are you afraid of people talking?”
“Yes and no. You don’t understand because you haven’t been here long enough, but those popular people have something against me, and some of them go out of their way to be mean to me. I’ve never fit in with them.”
“And you never will,” he told her seriously. “No matter where you go you are going to be different, Helen. It’s about time you got used to it.”
“I am used to it! I’ve had my whole life to get used to it!” she exclaimed as they drove into the school parking lot.
“Good. Now stop freaking out and listen for a sec. Those guys weren’t staring at us because they hate you. They were staring at us because they couldn’t figure out how the hell I convinced a girl who tried to strangle me the other week to get in my car and go out for coffee.”
“Oh, yeah. I forgot about that,” Helen said to the ground, getting out of the car. She tossed her bag over her shoulder.
“And I’d like to go back to forgetting about it. If we never talk about trying to kill each other again, it would be fine with me,” Lucas said quietly. He took her hand firmly in his and pulled her up against him so that her shoulder was touching his arm as they walked into school.
Everyone was staring. The halls were lined with blank faces and slack jaws as conversations were momentarily halted and then continued twice as loud when Helen and Lucas passed. Helen tried to pull her hand out of Lucas’s, but he resisted at first. Finally, he let go when he realized that Helen was not just being modest, she was about to panic.
“Lennie?” Claire called out warily. Helen smiled briefly at Lucas and veered in Claire’s direction.
“Where were you all weekend?” Claire asked, eyeing Lucas suspiciously.
“Did you try to call me?” Helen asked, grateful for an excuse to pry herself away from Lucas and hopefully away from all the stares.
“Like, five times. What happened to you?”
“My phone broke,” Helen said apologetically. Then she turned to Lucas. “I have to stop at my locker before homeroom. Thanks for the ride,” she told him bluntly.
“Okay. I’ll see you later then,” he said, accepting his dismissal as gracefully as he could. When he was no more than three steps away, Claire grabbed Helen’s arm and dragged her toward her locker.
“What the holy hand grenade was that?” Claire practically shouted. Helen shushed her as she wrestled with her locker combination.
“We had a long talk,” Helen said quickly. “We don’t hate each other anymore.”
“A talk? Yeah, right. I’m sure tongues were involved but for some reason I don’t think much language was used.” Claire looked angry, but Helen was suddenly angrier.
“Stop it, Claire! I mean it! I had a really rough weekend. I’m sorry I didn’t think to call you last night but my father was pissed at me for leaving him stranded at the airport.”
“Well, tell me about it now then!” Claire replied defensively. “Not like you have to say anything. Everyone can see that you and Lucas are suddenly a couple.”
“I don’t know what we are, but it’s not something I can sum up with an easy label like ‘couple,’ okay?” Stressed, Helen shuffled through her books and realized that she hadn’t done any of her homework.
“Why can’t you just be honest with me? You slept with him,” Claire accused her. Her eyes were hurt. Helen knew she couldn’t shut her out entirely.
“Honestly? I did sleep with him. Twice. But not the way you think,” she said frankly. She turned Claire around and steered them both to Hergie’s. “We’ve never even kissed.”
“Rubbish!” Claire declared, stopping dead in the middle of the hall.
“Ask him yourself. You’ve got classes with him all day,” Helen responded, perfectly serious. The bell rang and they both had to run the last few steps to make it through the door before Hergie closed it.
Helen had a terrible morning. Several teachers considered giving her detention for not doing her homework and every single girl in school was furious with her for getting a ride with Lucas. Helen’s relationships with the girls in her class had always been strained. For years she’d gone out of her way to be nice to them, but she’d finally given up when she noticed that if she kept her head down and her mouth shut she could slide under the radar.
That was all over now that she had been seen coming to school with Lucas. She had crossed some sort of imaginary line, broken the truce that she had entered into by refusing to compete, and they’d declared war on her. All day long, Helen found that if she looked anywhere but at the board or her desk she was shot nasty looks. To top everything else off, Gretchen was whispering vicious rumors about Helen to anyone who would listen, and Claire was still upset.
Helen couldn’t help but smile with relief when she saw Lucas at his locker before lunch. He seemed to be the only person in the entire school who would smile back at her.
“So you like me again, huh?” he said as she made her way toward him.
“Not you too,” Helen moaned. “Is there a sign on my back that says ‘kick me’?”
“It’s just gossip, Helen. It can’t hurt us,” he said, wisely deciding not to tease her anymore.
“Maybe it can’t hurt you,” Helen muttered. She put a hand on her belly. Lucas saw her do it and was just about to ask what was wrong when Hector and Jason joined them.
“Your mom’s here,” Jason told Lucas, who nodded as though he was expecting her.
“What’s wrong?” Helen asked.
“Nothing. We’re meeting with the principal because my mom is going to try and talk our way back on to the football team,” Lucas explained.
“She’s playing the ‘have pity on a poor little woman raising so many gigantic boys’ card and then she’ll beg them to let us beat up kids from other schools instead of each other. All to the benefit of Nantucket High, of course,” Jason said with a grin. “It never fails. She’s like the Einstein of guilt.”
“But should you three be allowed to play football?” Helen said with a disapproving frown. “I mean, you all have an unfair advantage.”
“Keep talking, track star,” Hector replied with a little heat.
“Helen runs because she needs a scholarship for college,” Lucas said, shooting Hector a warning glance. “We play sports because it’s expected of us. It’s annoying, actually, because we have to pretend to be unbearably weak and slow.”
“And we spend as much time making sure no one gets hurt as we do playing,” added Jason with a rueful smile. “The truth is we’d much rather be beating each other up than pretending to beat up mortals, but that wouldn’t look normal at all.”
“Well, good luck on the whole looking-normal thing,” Helen said briskly, stepping aside to let Jason and Hector go past her.
“I’ll find you after school,” Lucas promised her as he followed his cousins. He glanced back and gave her a concerned look. Helen tried to smile for him, but her expression was so phony she wondered if Lucas could feel the lie in it.
Helen slouched into the cafeteria, hoping to duck across the room without attracting too much attention. She saw Gretchen say something to Amy Heart and then the whole table of cheerleaders started laughing mockingly at Helen. It took Helen far too long to recover, and by the time she got herself oriented, everyone in the cafeteria was staring at her. She retreated to her usual table with Matt and Claire, sure she could feel a cramp coming on.
“Would you please just stand up straight!” Claire barked at her. “There’s nothing more pathetic than watching you try to dissolve feetfirst into the frigging floor, and I swear if I catch you doing it one more time I’m going to lose it.”
It was the last straw. Helen spun around on her heel and fled the cafeteria. She tried to eat her lunch in the restroom, sitting on a sink, but the venue was so unappetizing that she gave up on her sandwich after a few bites.
She made it through her last three classes and practically ran to the girls’ locker room when the final bell rang, but Claire was already there waiting for her.
“Sorry I yelled at you earlier,” she said bashfully. She looked so cute when she was apologizing that Helen couldn’t even pick up a grudge, let alone carry one.
“Oh, forget it. I’ve been a flake, and I’d be angry, too, if I were you.” Helen threw an arm over Claire’s shoulder and led her outside after they changed.
“One thing, and then I’m going to leave you alone about it until you come to me to talk,” Claire said as they walked past the football field. Helen didn’t have the patience for any more questions.
“We’ve never even kissed, Gig,” she said, cutting Claire off.
“Really?” Claire practically shouted. Helen nodded and bumped Claire playfully with her hip.
“Really, really. I almost kissed him once, but he told me to lie down and go to sleep.”
“No way!” Claire shouted. Helen grabbed her, clamping a hand over her mouth.
“He’s right over there,” she said, gesturing toward him with her chin. “I told you I’d tell you if anything happened. I’m not trying to keep secrets from you.”
Claire gave Helen a knowing smile.
“You’ve always kept secrets. But it’s okay. When you’re ready to tell me you will,” she said patiently. Then she tackled Helen, trying to wrestle her to the ground. Helen went along with it, pretending to be overpowered by her pint-sized pal, both of them laughing hysterically. The fun only lasted a moment.
“Get a room,” said a boy’s amused voice.
“You wish,” Claire answered back. “Wait. How’d you get over here so fast?”
Helen rolled over onto her back, blew her tangled hair out of her face, and saw Lucas and Jason standing over them.
“We saw you go down so we ran over to check it out,” Lucas said, ignoring Claire’s question.
“Thanks. She is pretty ferocious,” Helen replied, allowing Claire to flip her over one more time before Lucas helped her up.
“Five feet and two inches of pure terror,” Claire boasted as she held out her hand, expecting Jason to help her. He folded his arms across his chest deliberately.
“Is that how tall you are without those ridiculous shoes?” he said derisively. “I think I was born bigger than that.”
“I bet you were. Five feet of fat head and two inches of ass,” Claire muttered, standing up.
“Claire!” Helen blurted out, shocked. Lucas’s shoulders were shaking with laughter. Jason pretended to take the joke okay, but Helen suspected his feelings were hurt.
Helen bit back her own laughter and gave Claire a little pinch as punishment. Claire yelped in protest, pointing out that monkey bites had been off-limits since they were ten, and was about to say something else to Jason when the Delos boys were called back to practice by their coach.
Helen watched as Lucas jogged back to the football field. Running in the sun, he was about the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen.
“Crap. We’re late,” Claire said, and they picked up their pace to catch up with their teammates, having to run up to the trailhead where Coach Tar was waiting with her clipboard. She was already shouting out start times, so Helen and Claire just kept running, calling back to their coach as they crossed over the line. Coach scribbled their times down, shaking her head.
“You owe me a full minute off your last run for being late, Hamilton!” she shouted after them.
“Sure, Coach!” Helen shouted back before she lowered her voice to berate Claire privately. “Why’d you say that to him?” she asked, still feeling bad for Jason.
“Because it felt fantastic!” Claire replied unapologetically.
“I like Jason,” Helen said, realizing it was true. He had always been kind to her, and he seemed to have a good head on his shoulders. “He’s a really nice guy, and you were awful to him.”
“Of course you like him, because Jason is nice to everyone. Everyone but me. You don’t have classes with us so you haven’t seen him do it, but whenever we debate, he always tries to shut me down, arguing against whatever position I take. Even when he actually agrees with me, he argues just to play devil’s advocate.”
“And why do you think he does that?” Helen asked with a little grin.
“I asked him, and do you know what he said?” Claire plowed on, getting herself even more worked up. “He said everyone else in this school is afraid to stand up to me in a debate, except for him, and it’s good for me to have to work a little bit for once in my life!”
“How dare he challenge you to think deeper,” Helen said with mock horror.
“Believe me, it’s not a favor. He’s just trying to prove he’s smarter than me.”
“Is he?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe. Lucas is smarter than all of us, so there goes valedictorian. And then there’s Ariadne. She’s really bright, too, but I think I have her beat. We’ll see what happens,” Claire said, biting at her lower lip.
She was deeply worried about all the new competition, and Helen hadn’t even asked her how classes were going so far. It sounded like Claire had basically given up on her lifelong dream of graduating at the top of the class, and Helen hadn’t noticed.
“I’ve been a terrible friend to you these past couple of days, haven’t I?” Helen asked, suddenly disgusted with herself.
“I wouldn’t say terrible,” Claire said with a wry smile. “But you could do me a favor to make up for it if you like.”
“Anything,” Helen replied immediately.
“If you could keep Lucas awake and occupied the night before exams . . .” Claire said, already holding up her arms to defend herself from Helen’s pretend slaps. “I don’t know why you’re fighting it, Len. One, he’s frigging gorgeous. Two, he’s so frigging gorgeous you need to count it twice. Three, he saw you fall down and left practice to see if you were okay. That’s, like, devotion.”
Helen didn’t know how to respond. She couldn’t exactly explain that Lucas had only come over to make sure she was okay because several of his relatives were trying to kill her. The image of Kate lying unconscious on the dirty ground flashed into Helen’s head and her stomach fluttered. Like Kate, Claire was in danger just being around her.
“I gotta pick up the pace,” Helen said urgently, and Claire nodded.
“Show Lucas those legs are for more than drooling over and call me later,” she said cheerfully before Helen sped off.
When Claire was out of sight, Helen sighed to herself, fighting back a fit of guilt. She didn’t know what she would do if anyone ever hurt Claire. The thought distracted her from reining in her stride and she almost allowed herself to run into Coach Tar’s view far too early. At the last moment she remembered to duck behind some bushes, waiting several minutes before pretending to sprint the last few yards. She still finished first, of course, and then had to spend another half hour waiting for Lucas to finish up with practice. If he was going to continue driving her to school in the morning, she decided she was going to have to come up with another plan for getting to work afterward.
As soon as Helen walked in the front door of the News Store, Kate started following her around with a stunned look on her face.
“Wow!” Kate managed to say after a few moments of speechlessness. “He’s like . . . wow! I could go to jail for even thinking what I’m thinking.”
“Kate!” Helen exclaimed, throwing a balled-up napkin at her. “I thought you were a feminist!”
“What’s that got to do with anything?”
“Aren’t you always preaching that there can be no equality if the sexes objectify each other?”
“Yeah, but damn!” Kate said, fanning herself with her hand. “When I was your age all of the guys were trying to prove how antiestablishment they were by out-uglying each other. I so got robbed!”
“Keep on going and I’ll tell my dad he’s got competition,” Helen teased, but the joke didn’t have the effect she thought it would. The laughter went right out of Kate’s eyes and the smile melted off her face.
“I don’t think it would make any difference to him,” she said, and then abruptly changed the subject. “But we’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you and Lucas and the importance of condoms.”
After several rounds of denial, and a few breaks to help customers, Kate finally accepted the fact that Helen was still as pure as the driven snow.
“Is he gay?” Kate asked. “I mean, look at you, Len.”
“I haven’t asked, but I’m pretty sure he’s straight,” Helen replied, and then she sighed. “I honestly don’t know what’s going on.”
“No reason to rush, and don’t let anyone make you feel bad if you want to wait, either. It’s more fun if you take your time, anyway,” Kate said with a warm smile, changing the subject at the first sign of Helen’s discomfort.
Although Kate seemed convinced that eventually she and Lucas would go beyond virginal hand-holding, Helen suddenly wasn’t so sure. The one time she had tried to kiss Lucas he had told her to go to sleep. Despite what everyone was saying about them, the truth was that she and Lucas were no more than friends. Lucas could have anyone he wanted, and if Kate’s response was any indication, that included women long out of high school.
Knowing that didn’t do anything to help Helen’s confidence. She could tell that Lucas liked her—she’d caught him staring at her and she’d heard his heart pound when she lay down next to him—but for some reason Lucas didn’t seem to want to do anything about it. Was that the way dating always was in the beginning, or was she unintentionally doing something to push Lucas away? She’d never had a boyfriend, and she honestly didn’t know what “normal” was.
After work, she went home and forced herself to do all of her school assignments before bed. By the time she switched out the light it was well past two. Helen was beyond tired, but she still couldn’t fall asleep. She felt like she was missing something, or maybe misunderstanding something. Lucas obviously liked her company and felt protective of her, but neither of those things meant that he was attracted to her. Maybe she wasn’t his type. Maybe he even had a girlfriend back in Spain. Helen imagined a dark siren with long black curls, olive skin, and a sexy Spanish accent waiting for Lucas to come back to Europe.
She flopped over in bed and put a pillow over her head, vowing not to be the pathetic loser who chases after a boy she can never have. She needed more information about Lucas, but since he was new in school, and no one knew his previous history with girls, Helen was going to have to see what she could get out of Ariadne and hope she didn’t come off as too obvious.
