I’m frozen.
My limbs have turned to stone and my body doesn’t follow my brain’s command to move.
Flee.
Survive.
Tentacles of fear wrap around my rib cage, keeping me imprisoned in place.
And that’s not even the strangest part.
To say I’m not scared of the gun in his hand would be a lie. I haven’t been this close to a weapon since I moved to New York and adopted a completely different lifestyle. However, that’s not what robs my breath and burns my lungs.
That’s not what digs rusty daggers in my chest and forbids my body from acting on my brain’s commands.
It’s the deep ice in his gray eyes.
They’re as harsh and unforgiving as the winter, as cold, too, with the sole purpose to eradicate any life in his way.
He stares at me with silent apprehension. He’s not glaring or scowling, but the threat is right there.
In his silence.
In the fact that he knew to look straight in my direction as if he were aware I was there all along.
Paralyzing fear loosens my limbs and a shot of survival instinct bursts into my ribcage. It’s like I’m back in that black box, locked, left all alone, and the only way to remain alive is if I dig my way out.
I’ve always used that childhood memory as my darkest time, the one moment that I compare everything to. The jabs, the behind-my-back talks, the harassment. All of it.
But I feel like this situation will put that moment to shame. I survived the other time, but my chances of getting out of this alive are slim to none.
Still, I stand on shaky legs and dart behind the cars, hoping to get to the elevator and—
I’m not even two steps in before a harsh grip wraps around my upper arm and I’m yanked back with a hand to my mouth.
I don’t stop to look at who it is.
A rush of life bubbles in my veins and I squirm, hitting and biting at the hand. My movements are frantic and far from calculated. I doubt that I’m doing any damage, but I don’t stop to think about that. I don’t stop to let them hurt me.
In my attempt to get free, the bulky blond guy drags me to where the murder took place. My insides lurch at the view of the dead man with a hole in his forehead, sprawled on the ground. My struggles increase in volume and I kick and scratch, mumbling my cries for help that merely come out like an ugly horror movie sound.
Cold metal meets my forehead and my whole body goes slack. I’m standing in front of their bossman with the impenetrable gaze of his, freezing ash eyes boring into me. My heart thumps and my lips tremble beneath the hand that’s muting my voice.
This close, he’s even more striking, but in a quiet kind of way, like the rare attractive people who don’t want to stand out in a crowd.
Is he going to kill me now as he did that man? If I have any doubt, the complete disregard in his blank stare erases it.
This man is capable of killing countless people without a second thought. He’s capable of ending lives and walking away as if nothing happened.
“Kolya is going to remove his hand and you’re going to be quiet,” he says ever so casually as if he’s inviting me for tea. “If you don’t, I’ll have to shut you up using other methods.”
My face must be as pale as the white neon lights overhead. All I keep thinking about is the metal that’s now connected to my forehead and that I will soon meet the same fate as the Italian man.
“Nod if you understand,” he continues in his unperturbed tone.
What choice do I have except to agree? I certainly don’t want to find out what his ‘other methods’ are.
I nod, but he looks at me for a beat too long, stealing all the air from my lungs. I think he hasn’t seen me nod or something, but then he tilts his head at the man standing behind me. Kolya, he said his name is.
The man releases me, just like that, and leaves me in front of his boss. I massage the spot where he grabbed me, sensing a bruise already forming. I try my damnedest not to glance sideways, because if I catch a glimpse of the corpses, I’ll start vomiting.
The bossman studies me for a long second, his gaze sliding from my face to my arm. I drop my hand, forcing it to stay still by my side.
“Fight or scream and you won’t like the consequences.” He digs the gun deeper into my forehead, driving the point home.
“O-okay.” I sound like a scared kitten.
And I am.
These men just killed people. Why would my fate be any different?
He drags his gun down the hollow of my cheek. I swallow, and it’s not only because of the deadly weapon. The way he watches as the metal slides down appears to be nothing short of anticipation.
The observation is burning—invasive, even—as if he’s sizing me up, and contemplating whether he should waste a bullet on me.
If I want to get out of this alive, I need to be smart about it. I need to bargain my way out of this situation as best I can.
“I’ll pretend I saw nothing.” My voice quivers, even though I try to sound as confident and neutral as possible.
“Will you now?” His tone isn’t mocking, but it suggests he doesn’t believe a word I say. “Are you sure you won’t call 911 as soon as you round the corner?”
My lips part. I should’ve realized he’d figure that out. I mean, yes, of course I’m calling the police. Who in their right mind would witness a murder—a triple one, at that—and remain quiet about it?
At the reminder of the dead men, my stomach coils, rippling with tension, and I bite down the taste of nausea.
“Yes,” I whisper.
“How come I don’t believe you?” The slow tempo of his voice implies that he not only thinks I’m lying, but he also finds the idea that I thought I could fool him ridiculous.
You know what? Screw justice right now. I just need to save myself. Justice won’t be able to do it for me.
“I really won’t,” I say it like I mean it this time, because I truly have no plans to scheme against him considering that the possibility of being shot is hanging between us like a guillotine.
“What’s your name?” he asks out of the blue, taking me completely by surprise.
I think of a fake name to give him, because the less he knows about me, the better. But before I can open my mouth, he lifts my chin with the gun. “And do not lie to me. I have my ways of finding the truth, and if I catch you in a lie, it’ll be your first and final strike.”
“Lia,” I blurt out, fear getting the better of me. “My name is Lia.”
“Lia…” he rolls my name off his tongue with his accent, as if that will give it meaning. “So you’ll pretend you saw nothing tonight, Lia?”
I nod more times than needed, my chin hitting the gun with every movement, and nausea recoils in my belly.
“How will I make sure of it?”
“You…you can trust me.”
His lips twitch and I find myself holding my breath, waiting for the smile to break free, but it never does. It seems trapped somewhere out of reach, just like the rest of his emotions. “Trust you? Surely even you realize how absurd that sounds.”
“There are surveillance cameras,” I blurt again. I want to tell him that the police will find out about the murders—and mine—if he decides to go through with it.
“Don’t worry about those. They’re not flesh and bone and, therefore, can be dealt with expeditiously. The current topic of discussion is you.”
A human. Flesh and bone he can hurt.
His underlying threat mounts in the air and swiftly pierces through my jumbled nerves.
I rack my brain before I finally whisper, “I…I have money. It’s not much, but…”
“Do I look like someone who needs your money?”
I stare at him then, really stare at him. At his pressed pants and elegant shirt. At his leather shoes and the expensive watch strapped to his wrist. He definitely doesn’t look like someone who needs money. However, he specified it. He said he doesn’t need my money, as if that has a category on its own.
He glides the tip of his gun to my mouth and I shudder, recalling exactly where that muzzle was only seconds before.
“You’ll keep these lips shut. You’ll forget all of our faces.”
I nod meekly. My only focus is to escape his swirling orbit that’s more freezing than the winter outside.
“If you let even a single word out, I’ll know, and believe me, you won’t like what happens, Lia. In fact, you won’t like it in the slightest.”
A burst of fear snaps my shoulder blades together and I stare at him, dumbfounded. How will he know? How is that going to be possible?
“Is that clear?” he speaks slowly, unhurriedly, cementing his words.
I nod.
He pulls his gun away and I let out a long sigh.
“Use your words, Lia.”
“Yes.” My voice is barely a whisper.
“Say, ‘yes, I understand.’”
“Yes…I understand.”
He reaches for me with his other hand and I freeze as his fingers replace his gun, gently gliding over my lips. Flames erupt across my skin, even though his touch is like crossing paths with death. Literally and figuratively.
“These lips will stay shut.”
My throat clogs and I’m unable to make a sound or even nod my head.
He releases me as fast as he grabbed me and a cold wave washes over the earlier fire, dousing it in one harsh sweep.
The bossman tilts his head toward the elevator. “Go.”
For a second, I don’t believe what he’s said, that he’s simply letting me go. I take a tentative step backward, fully expecting him to pounce on me.
He doesn’t make a move to follow.
I back away another two steps, not breaking eye contact. When he doesn’t move, I run to the elevator and punch the call button.
My frantic gaze is still on him.
The stranger.
The scary fucking stranger.
He remains as I left him, his gun motionless at his side and his attention on me as if he’s contemplating whether or not he should shoot me in the face anyway.
The elevator finally opens and I dash inside, holding my breath and shaking uncontrollably as I hit my floor’s number and code. I miss the first time because of my trembling fingers and scattered thoughts. I have to try again before my passcode is accepted.
As the door finally closes, I slide down to the floor and empty my stomach in the middle of the elevator.
He didn’t kill me. He didn’t put a bullet in my head.
So why do I feel like I just signed my death certificate?
