“You have to say yes,” my friend Eric says as he idly strums his guitar.
After my classes, I decided to swing by Eric’s house. He lives here with another guy, Lennon. The two of them, plus their friend Ted and Ted’s girlfriend, Mackenzie, have a band, The Letterman Jackets, that I sometimes jam with. I’ve even filled in for Mackenzie at a few shows when she was sick or had a conflict.
“Headlining the Spring Fling could open up more paying gigs for us,” Lennon says. He’s a senior computer science major who plays bass in the band and is the level-headed one of the group.
“They didn’t ask for the band.” Mackenzie takes a seat on the couch between Eric and Lennon. “They asked for Jane.”
Mackenzie has an amazing voice. It’s raspy and unique. She has a limited range, but more than enough style to make up for it.
I knew telling them could stir up some unease, but they already know that Paris has been hounding me since we got back from the holiday break. “I would never do it without you guys, but it doesn’t matter because I’m not doing it at all.”
Eric stops playing and looks up. “Why not?”
I squirm in my seat across from him. “We’ve been through this. I don’t have time to prepare for a show like that. We’d need twice as many songs as we usually do. Plus, some new material. We’ve been using the same setlist for the past year. And anyway, I’m taking a heavy course load this semester and trying to focus on that.”
Eric ignores my concerns. “Spring Fling is almost three months away. We have plenty of time.”
“We do?” Lennon asks.
The thing I don’t say, the thing I can’t say to these guys, is that I don’t want my first performance after revealing my identity to be singing the same cover songs we’ve been doing all over town. I want it to be bigger and better. I don’t have time to make sure every detail is perfect.
“You guys might, but I don’t. I’m taking French 2 this semester.” I stand and grab my backpack. “Speaking of, I need to get home.”
As I head to the door, Eric drops his guitar to the couch and follows me.
“We have a show this weekend. Will you sing with us?” he asks.
“What about Mackenzie? Did you run this by her?”
“She’s cool,” he says. “You can switch off songs or sing together.”
I laugh lightly. “I’ll take that as a no, you haven’t talked to her.”
His expression says it all. Mackenzie has always been really nice about me filling in for her, but joining them as another singer isn’t cool unless they’ve all talked about it and agreed.
“I appreciate the offer, but I’m not going to take songs from her or steal her spotlight.”
I open the front door and Eric grabs the side to hold it for me as I step outside. “Fine, but tell me you’ll at least think about the Spring Fling. You belong on stage, and we won’t let you down. French isn’t that hard. Get a tutor or something.”
I reach forward and hug him with one arm. “Thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
His next response comes when I’m halfway down the sidewalk. “That wasn’t an answer, Greenfield.”
I lift one hand over my head without turning around.
As soon as I get home, I tell the girls about my run-in with mystery guy and Cam asking me out. Dahlia and I live with two other roommates, Daisy and Violet.
The three of them sit on my bed while I try on six different dresses for my date.
“That one is stunning,” Violet says as I come out of the closet in a slinky silver dress.
Dahlia nods. “But maybe a little too much for a Monday night.”
“I’m never afraid to be overdressed.” I turn side to side as I stand in front of the full-length mirror on the back of the closet door. “But I’m not loving silver with my new hair.”
As Ivy Greene I had been known for my seafoam green hair. When I moved to Valley, I went platinum. But this new turn in my life where I’m Jane but no longer hiding Ivy, I decided on blonde with green on just the ends. It’s a mix of both worlds. A little Jane and a little Ivy. It’s fitting as I figure out who I am, but I need to reconsider my wardrobe.
“Only you could get asked out by one guy and then literally fall into your mystery crush’s arms five minutes later.” Daisy looks at me with her big, blue eyes full of admiration and playful jealousy.
“It was a little embarrassing. He ran off so fast, like he was annoyed he’d needed to save me or something.” My insides heat as I remember the way his intense hazel eyes stared down at me. I adjust the straps of the dress. “What do you think?”
“I still like the black one best,” Violet says as she sits forward and grabs the first dress I put on. “It’s simple, but sexy, and it looks killer on you.”
I take the dress from her and head back into the closet to change. “I’m running out of time, so I guess it’ll have to do.”
“I can’t believe you’re finally going out on a date with Cam.” Daisy stands as I come out of the closet and zips up the back of my dress.
“Me either. He’s so cute.”
Dahlia doesn’t say anything. She isn’t team Cam, but that’s just because she doesn’t really know him and what she does know of him is that he didn’t show the one time we were supposed to hang out.
“I have to go. I’m staying at Jordan’s tonight, but I want to hear all about it tomorrow when I get back.” Daisy hugs me. “Have fun and be careful.”
Vi is the next to stand and hug me. When she pulls back, she tips her head down, sending her black hair falling over her shoulders as she regards me seriously. “Have so much fun. And I want more details on mystery guy tomorrow. We need to figure out who this guy is.”
“Already working on it. I scoured all the athletic team rosters. Next up, professor bios.”
She laughs. I’m serious. I can still feel his strong arms cradling me against him. I push that memory away for later. I need to focus. Cam is going to be here any minute.
When it’s just me and Dahlia, I hold my hands out to my sides. “Still your favorite? I probably have time for one more wardrobe change.”
No sooner do I say the words than my phone pings with a text notification. My stomach flips. “He’s here.”
“You look so hot. Cam is going to choke on his saliva. I hope he knows how lucky he is.” She stands and waits for me to grab my purse and cell phone, and then we head downstairs together.
Before I head out, Dahlia gives me basically the same pep talk that Daisy did. “Have so much fun and be careful. Text me if you need anything or if Cam is a total bore.”
“I’m not going to need an out. Cam is anything but boring and tonight is going to be amazing.” I slide my phone into my purse and flash my biggest smile at my best friend before heading out the door.
The Hideout isn’t very busy tonight. The restaurant and bar near campus is often packed with students or locals, but the rain and cold seems to have kept people home.
I didn’t bother with a jacket and that was a mistake. My bare arms and legs are frozen, and then Cam picks a table on the bar side that’s near the door. Every time it opens, a cold draft whips through. I’ve barely touched the Sprite in front of me and am wishing I’d ordered a coffee or something else warm.
“Tell me more about the singing and acting thing,” Cam says. He’s wearing a long-sleeved black button-up over a gray T-shirt. Leaning back in his chair, he rests one arm on the empty chair next to him and his long middle finger taps the wood absently. He has a nervous energy about him, always moving somehow, but his gaze doesn’t leave me.
“What do you want to know?” I ask, soaking up his attention. He’s so cute and unexpectedly more interested in me than I would have guessed from his cocky demeanor.
“All of it. Why’d you stop? What was it like? Who’s the biggest celeb you’ve met?”
I laugh softly. “It was fun, mostly, but it was still a job. Lots of long hours and hard work.”
He bobs his head like he’s waiting for me to say more. I hate name dropping.
“Penelope Hart. She was on the show before her career blew up.”
Sing Your Heart Out ran for four seasons and almost six years of my life. The premise was a bit cheesy. It followed three sisters who were in a pop group together, traveling the world during the summers to perform, but maintaining “normal” lives the rest of the year. It was fun pretending to go to middle school and deal with teenage drama while in real life I had tutors and barely enough time to hang out with my friends.
But for whatever reason, the show resonated with people, and for a while I couldn’t go anywhere without being recognized.
“She’s so hot,” he says automatically, then smiles sheepishly. “Sorry.”
“No. She is. And she’s nice too. Or she was. I haven’t talked to her in years.”
He stops fidgeting and leans forward, elbows on the table. “Why’d you stop?”
“I wanted to enjoy my teenage years and then go to college.” That isn’t the complete truth, but I don’t like to think of my career as over, even if it’s been years since I did anything noteworthy.
“I’m glad you’re here, but I can’t imagine giving all that up for this. If I hadn’t injured my arm last year, I would have dropped out to go pro.”
“Really? You had a chance to play baseball professionally?” Valley U has a lot of athletes across different sports that have gone on to play in the MLB, NBA, NFL, and more, but I’ve never heard anyone talk about Cam as being one of the guys on that track.
He dodges my question. “Eh, this isn’t so bad though. College is cool.”
I smile and take another icy sip of my drink. The door opens again, and a full-body shiver wracks my body.
“Ah, there they are.” Cam stands and brings my attention to the group of guys that just walked in.
I recognize some of his teammates from parties, but I haven’t spent a lot of time around the baseball guys. Puzzled, I smile as Cam introduces me around. It’s only when they pull up chairs to sit with us that I fully understand what’s happening. The flicker of annoyance I feel at our date turning into something else completely is short-lived when Cam sits beside me and drapes an arm around my shoulders. I lean into him and revel in the warmth.
“You’re the famous chick,” one of the guys says. I’ve already forgotten his name.
I offer a weak smile.
“Ivy Greene,” Cam says. “Look her up. She knows Penelope Hart.”
The guy grabs his phone from the table and, much to my horror, looks me up on the spot. The guys hover around his phone as they swipe through my Instagram account and then do a Google search.
“Why don’t you go by Ivy now?” Cam asks. “It’s a great name.”
“It’s not my real name,” I say with a shrug. The truth is my agent at the time came up with Ivy Greene based on some test cases of names that had star potential. I liked it well enough, but it’d never felt like my name. It was a job, a character. Maybe I’d feel differently if I were still acting or singing professionally.
Cam just laughs along, keeping a tight hold on me as his friends continue to perform a deep dive on my life according to the internet. It’s the weirdest experience I’ve had at Valley. Sure, lots of people have been curious, but they’re acting like I’m not here while gawking at old pictures of me. It’s giving me major ick, but I try to brush it off and keep a smile on my face. I don’t want this to ruin my date with Cam. We’re finally out together and things were going great. Well, maybe not great, but I was having fun.
I’m relieved when the conversation eventually veers off onto something else. I’m not usually so quiet, but I find myself fading into the background as they talk about practice, parties, and people I don’t know.
Cam squeezes my shoulder and I glance up into his eyes. He really is so handsome.
His gaze drops to my mouth, and he leans closer. I stop breathing while I wait to see if he’s going to kiss me. It seems like a bold move an hour into our first date, but I can’t say I’m not interested in finding out if he’s as good a kisser as the Valley U female population has made him out to be.
“Let’s take a pic,” he says.
“A picture?”
“Yeah.” He holds up his phone in front of us and then leans his face closer to mine.
After we’ve smiled through a few photos, he removes his arm from around me. “My buddies back home are never going to believe I’m out with Ivy Greene.”
My face flushes and I tense.
“Oh, I want a pic with her.” The guy who was looking me up on his phone earlier glances between me and Cam, silently asking for approval.
“Let’s do a group one,” someone else says.
“You don’t mind, do you, beautiful?” Cam asks.
Even if I did, saying so is going to make me seem like a total bitch. I’m not sure if my irritation is warranted. Maybe I’m being extra sensitive because I thought Cam and I would be hanging out alone tonight. “No. Let’s do it.”
For several minutes, the guys take turns getting their photo taken with me individually and then as a group. It draws the attention of other people in the bar and I’m really thankful it’s such a quiet night.
The guys are all having a good time and I’m desperately trying to see the fun in being their plaything. I’m not sure whose genius idea it is for them to lift me up and hold me across them for a final picture. One guy has his arms around my shoulders, another at my middle, Cam holds me around my hips, and two others are holding my legs.
“I don’t really think this dress was made for this pose,” I say as I clench my legs together. The fabric is tight enough I don’t think I’m giving anyone a free show, but one slip and they’re all going to see the lacy underwear I picked out for tonight.
The bartender snaps the pic for them, but instead of putting me down, Cam says, “Oh, I have an idea. Put her on the bar.”
“Wait, wait, wait,” I say as they somehow navigate me upright and stand me on top of the bar.
I glance at the bartender apologetically. “I’m so sorry.”
“My manager will kill me if he sees this,” he says through a smile, but he doesn’t tell me to get off his bar.
“Not funny,” I say to Cam. “Help me down before I fall or get us kicked out.”
“You look so good up there. Sing for us.”
“What?” My voice quavers. “No way. Help me down.” I’ve had a fantasy or two about dancing and singing on top of a bar, living my best life with lots of people watching and singing along, but this is so not it.
Cam still doesn’t come forward to help me. He sticks out his bottom lip in a pout and stares up at me. “Come on, babe. You have an amazing voice and you look so hot.”
More and more people are watching. A few of the guys even have their phones aimed in my direction. The way the bar is situated, people on the restaurant side can see me too.
My legs wobble and it feels like an elephant just took a seat on my chest. I have never wanted to disappear in front of a crowd more than I do right now. My vision goes hazy, and I bite down on my bottom lip to stop it from trembling.
It’s only when Cam’s blurry body in front of me is pushed out of the way that I notice the dark head approaching me. I blink back what I now realize are tears in time to see my mystery guy reach up and grab me around the waist.
I freeze under his touch, but then his voice is reassuring me as his big hands span out around my middle. “You’re okay. I’ve got you.”
