“I’m so nervous,” I tell Phillip as we enter the doctor’s office.
“I’m excited,” he says. “This is going to be so incredible. We’re going to see our baby for the first time.”
“I know. I’m so excited, too, but I’m scared. Afraid to get my hopes up. Especially after you were talking about all the different types of miscarriages. With the blighted ovum one, you can feel pregnant, even start to show, but there’s no baby. Just an empty sac. That would be so sad. And what about the other one you read about, where they couldn’t find a heartbeat? I don’t know what I’ll do if that happens, Phillip.”
He grabs my hand and squeezes it. “Everything is going to be just fine. I’m sure of it.”
I nod. “You’re right. It will be fine,” I say, but I’m still a nervous wreck. It’s weird. I know I’m pregnant. I know my body is changing, but sometimes, I don’t feel pregnant, which makes me question if everything is okay.
“Do you care if I record the ultrasound?” he asks me. “Danny said we should even though they will print us out a picture.”
“Yeah, I think we should.”
“Did you drink enough water?”
“My teeth are floating.”
Phillip laughs, and it helps break the tension. “That ought to be good enough then.”
We get set up in the ultrasound room—me on the table with my shirt pulled up and Phillip sitting next to me, his phone ready to record.
Our ultrasound tech comes in. She puts gel on my stomach and rubs the wand across it. Grayness moves across the screen in front of us. She frowns at the screen.
I squeeze Phillip’s hand tighter, worried there’s no baby to find.
But then she slides the wand to the other side of my abdomen and says, “There we go.”
On the screen is a little black oval, and inside of it, at the bottom, is—
“Is that it? Is that our baby?”
“Yes, it is. See there? That’s the baby’s head,” she says, directing us with the pointer on the screen. “And there are the facial bones. You can see the cord coming out of the belly here, and there’s its bottom. How far along are you?”
“Eleven weeks.”
“It’s moving,” Phillip says, sounding a little worried.
I want to look at him, but my eyes are glued to the screen.
“It is very active,” she says. “The last baby I had was quiet and napping. This one is bouncing all over the place.”
“Look at his little arms move. And his legs are kicking. It’s amazing.”
“The baby is moving a lot. Is that normal?” Phillip asks.
“It’s completely normal. Let’s see if the baby will hold still long enough for me to get some measurements.” She makes a few clicks and then says, “Your baby is measuring at eleven weeks and two days, so its size is as expected. Your due date should be accurate.”
“Look at the baby! It’s going crazy. Is it because I’m nervous?”
“No,” she says. “Your baby’s putting on a show for you. Oh, look, there’s its hand. It just waved at you. Hello, baby.”
“Ohmigawd! Hi,” I say.
“Hello, Baby Mac,” Phillip says.
I turn to look at him. There’s joy written all over his face, and he’s practically vibrating; he’s so excited. He pulls my hand to his lips and kisses it.
“Can you believe that’s our baby?” he says to me.
“I can’t believe I can’t feel the baby moving. It’s all over the place.”
“Well, the baby’s not very big yet,” the tech says. “In a few more weeks, you’ll feel all of this. At first, like a flutter, and then later, you’ll feel hard kicks and elbows to the ribs. Look at him showing off. That was a somersault.”
“Did you see that?” Phillip says. “The baby just opened its mouth.”
“And swallowed,” the tech says.
“That’s amazing. This is all so breathtaking.”
“Let’s hear the baby’s heartbeat.”
The room fills with the kind of sound you would expect to hear in a submarine. An odd, sonar-like whooshing sound.
“That’s your baby’s heartbeat,” the tech says.
“That’s crazy. I can’t even believe this. I’m sorry. It’s just such—” I get choked up.
“A beautiful sound, isn’t it?” she says. “I never get tired of hearing it.”
“The heartbeat seems fast,” Phillip says.
“It is. About one hundred and sixty beats per minute. Your baby has a nice strong and normal heartbeat. Everything looks great.”
Phillip puts his lips across my knuckles again, only this time, he keeps his head down. When he finally looks up at me, his eyes are glistening with tears. “This is really happening.”
Seeing Phillip get emotional causes tears to flood my face.
I nod at him. “We’re really doing this. We’re really having a baby.”
We walk hand in hand to the car, not saying much. I think we’re still both in awe.
“I could have stayed all day and watched that. Have you ever seen anything so amazing?” he asks me.
“I haven’t. Could you believe how much it was moving? It was crazy.”
We go get lunch, but neither of us eats much. We’re too busy watching the ultrasound video over and over.
Later that evening, Phillip strolls in from work as I’m getting ready to run over to see the progress on Lori’s kitchen. His tie is slightly loosened, and he looks delectable.
“Hey,” he says, putting one hand on my ass and kissing my neck. “Where are you going in such a hurry?”
“I was just running over to see the kitchen progress before you got home.”
“My parents won’t be here until late tonight. They have a benefit dinner.”
“Yeah, I saw your mom was all dressed up. She looked really pretty.”
“Did you show her the ultrasound video?”
“No, I wanted to wait for you,” I tell him, giving him a kiss and running out the door. “I’ll be right back.”
When I’m standing in Lori’s kitchen, looking at a newly framed wall, I realize that I just missed out on an opportunity. “Lori, does Danny have a sexual tell?”
“What do you mean?”
“Like, in poker, a tell is how you can tell what kind of hand they have.”
“I don’t know. I’ve never thought of it. What does Phillip do?”
I walk up to her, put one hand on her ass, and pretend to kiss her neck just as Danny breezes in.
“Can I play, too?” he asks. “I knew you were gonna be a good neighbor.”
Lori and I look at each other and laugh. Danny struts across the kitchen and pulls Lori’s waist in tight to his but gives her just a sweet kiss on the cheek.
“Oh my God!” She bursts out laughing. Danny looks confused, but Lori points at me and screeches, “That was just it!”
“What was what?” he asks.
“Nothing,” she says to him.
“Well, on that note,” I say, “I’d better leave you two alone.”
“Good idea,” she says, not even bothering to walk me to the door.
When they’re finished with whatever they were doing, they come over for dinner. Since Phillip’s mom isn’t here, we eat delivery pizza at the kitchen island.
Phillip and Danny both stand and eat. Something she would not approve of.
And that makes me happy in a sadistic way.
“So, Mac,” Danny says, “did you know our wives have started hooking up behind our backs? I mean, the least they could do is let us watch if we can’t play along.”
Phillip squints at me as I’m setting down a plate of brownies.
Lori giggles in a way that makes her look guilty.
“What are you talking about?” Phillip asks.
“When I walked in tonight, your wife’s hand was on Lori’s ass, and she was kissing her neck. It was pretty hot, I’ll admit. Been a while since the days of two girls kissing.”
“We weren’t kissing, Danny,” I say.
Danny waves his hand at me and goes, “Whatever.”
“Did you do that in college?” Lori asks him. “Like, two girls at once? A threesome?”
Phillip and I remove all expression from our faces. I’m pretty sure this is not something Lori wants to hear about right now.
I say to her, “Of course not.” Then, I turn to Phillip. “I wasn’t kissing Lori. I was demonstrating your sexual tell.”
“My sexual tell?”
“Yeah, what you do when you want sex. You grab my ass and kiss right here on my neck. And Danny pulls Lori’s hips in tight to his, but then he just gives her a sweet little kiss on the cheek.”
“I do, do that.” Danny laughs. “Lori has one, too, though. She rubs her hand up under my shirt.”
“So, we had the ultrasound today,” Phillip says with a beaming smile.
“Really?” Lori says. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“JJ was nervous,” Phillip says. “We wanted to be sure everything was okay.”
“And?” Danny asks.
“We have a video,” Phillip says proudly.
