We’re driving to Kansas City to pick out office furniture. This is the lie Phillip told me.
Yes, Phillip told me a complete lie.
I know this because Danny told me that he talked Phillip into just looking at the house today.
So, I’m not at all sure what that means!
And it’s killing me!
I wanna talk about it!
I want him to tell me what he thinks. If he’s considering it.
I’m going craaazy with wondering.
And he’s sitting there, driving, all calm and cool, while bobbing his head to Aerosmith.
I wanna pin his head to the back of the seat and threaten him with torture if he doesn’t tell me what he’s thinking.
Why would he want to look at a house he thinks he can’t afford?
No. Be calm. Be cool.
Maintain the I know you don’t want to buy it routine.
You planted the seeds; now, let them grow.
And I’m trying to, but, hey, plants need a little water, right?
Maybe they’re not growing because I need to water them.
So, I say, “I’m surprised the commercial office furniture place is open on a Saturday.”
Phillip grins. “I lied. We’re not really doing that. Danny told you about the house next door that’s going on the market, right?”
“Yeah.”
“We’re gonna take a look at it today. See if it’s really as nice as Danny has been going on about.”
“But why would we do that?”
Phillip turns his head and gives me a confused look. “I wanted to surprise you with this. I thought you’d be really excited.”
I sigh, a defeated, slightly pretend sigh. “It’s hard to get excited about seeing something you can’t have. Lori says it’s gorgeous. All it’s gonna do is depress me more when we go look at houses in our price range. It’s like dangling Jimmy Choos in front of me and then making me buy my shoes at Target.”
Phillip squints his eyes at me. This is the part where he should say, Oh, Princess, but now, we can afford that house. It would be so cool to live by Danny and Lori, and it would be amazing, and we’ll live happily ever after.
Or something like that.
Instead, he smiles and says, “Well, if nothing else, maybe we can get some ideas from it. Kinda like when my mom tours those dream homes.”
“Yeah, I suppose,” I say pathetically again. I’m really trying hard not to pout.
But, all of a sudden, I totally am.
And I’m not faking it.
For real.
Because getting ideas was not the seed that I planted.
We look at the house. Danny has been whispering in Phillip’s ear about what he and Lori spent on their house, what the remodel is costing, and how this is a much better deal. Lori has mentioned how great it would be not to have the mess of a remodel.
And, well, I gush to myself since I can’t gush to anyone.
This house is IT!
Like Phillip is the ONE.
Like my dress is the ONE.
This house is the ONE!
Even the house knows he’s the one for me. The house is pleading with me like a hopeful lover, You know I’m the one for you, baby. Let’s live together.
The house has everything on Phillip’s wish list. A gorgeous kitchen with granite countertops and sparkling new appliances, a big island with six barstools, an open floor plan, and an incredible basement game room. If he isn’t already sold on the kitchen, the expansive master bedroom overlooking the lake with its huge closets and a bathroom where I’d happily spend the rest of my life, the sweeping staircase, and the huge deck, he has to be sold the second he sees the walk-out basement. It’s like a boy’s wet dream down here. Pool table, foosball, bar, poker table, three flat screens, sound system, huge sectional couch, and a hot tub out on the patio.
I’m so sold.
I wanna run outside, cheer, do cartwheels, and stab a big SOLD sign in the front yard. The sign would say, SOLD TO ME, and it’d have a picture of me hugging the front door.
Phillip and Danny are grinning like maniacs in the basement, which you’d think might be a good sign, but Phillip has said nothing to me to indicate this is any more than a dream tour.
Shit.
Speaking of shit, maybe I forgot to fertilize the seeds, and that’s why they’re not growing! I try to think of all the bullshit things I could say to make Phillip fall in love with this house.
But I can’t.
Truth is, I want him to love it for all the reasons I do. And, yes, I planted seeds, and that sounds sort of manipulative, but I don’t want him to get talked into doing something he doesn’t want to do. I don’t want him to be unhappy.
Even if that means passing up this amazing house.
You know, love kinda sucks sometimes.
It makes you do stupid stuff, like care more about the person you love than you do about yourself.
I watch him grin at Danny. I notice how sexily his forearm flexes when he runs his hand down the bar.
I’m pretty sure I could live in a shack with him and be happy. As long as he was there, it would feel like home.
I’m just so in love with that boy.
After our tour, we meet with the couple who owns the home. Phillip tells them the house is beautiful, what a great job they did on the remodel, and how they must be sad to leave it.
They agree as they grab us beers from the outdoor kitchen’s fridge.
An outdoor beer fridge?
Seriously? Is there anything this house doesn’t have?
Phillip discusses pricing with them. What they are going to list it for. What they’d take for it now. When they’d like to close.
I can see the corner of Phillip’s jaw twitching slightly. Usually, he does that when he’s trying to play it cool. When he doesn’t want to smile. It’s like his poker face.
But what does that mean? Does it mean he’s considering it?
No.
Not going to get my hopes up.
Because I don’t think so. I think he loves it, but he’s convinced we can’t afford it. I still don’t even understand why he agreed to look at it.
Nothing like setting yourself up for disappointment.
Or, well, setting me up for disappointment.
Phillip says to everyone, “Do you guys mind if Jadyn and I take a quick walk and talk about it?”
And I’m thinking, Talk about what?
Talk about how the house is great, but we can’t afford it?
Talk about which great ideas we should file away in our brains for someday?
Phillip nods for me to get up.
As we walk down toward the lake, he grabs my hand. “So, what’d you think? You didn’t say much in there. I thought you’d be oohing and aahing over everything. Didn’t you like it?”
“Well, Phillip, I think it’s a gorgeous, perfect, amazing house. It has everything I could possibly want. The kitchen is a dream, and the master bath is to die for, but I’d love it for the basement alone.”
His eyes light up. “The basement is totally tricked out. Can you imagine the parties we could throw down there?”
“Well, yeah.” I look really pathetic, I’m sure. I’m totally pouting—and not because I’m trying to get my way, but because I feel sad about this. I knew looking at something I couldn’t have was a bad idea. It’s depressing. “Maybe, someday, we can have a house like that.” I nod my head and put on my best fake smile.
Phillip pulls me into his arms. He softly runs his hand across my cheek and into my hair. I look deeply into his adorable brown eyes and feel bolstered with confidence.
It’ll be okay.
There will be other houses, but there’s not another Phillip.
I mentally stomp on the stupid seeds.
I want Phillip, and nothing else matters.
Phillip nuzzles his face into mine and says, “I was thinking maybe today should be someday.”
My eyes get big. I back away from him and barely whisper, “What do you mean?”
“I think we should start someday today and buy it. I thought you’d be more excited about this.”
Ohmigawd. I might start hyperventilating.
“Really? Are you serious? I didn’t think you were interested. I didn’t wanna get excited because I knew you were against spending that kind of money.”
“Well, that was before I had that kind of money sitting in the bank.”
I smile. Big.
“So, Princess, is that a yes?”
I fling myself on Phillip, jump into his arms, and wrap my legs around his waist. He twirls me around while I kiss him.
“That’s a yes,” I finally say. “In case you couldn’t tell.”
“I figured. I didn’t get this much excitement from the ring. Should we go tell them we’ll take it?”
“Not just yet,” I say. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him some more.
