AMANDINE SAT ON THE BED, looking at Gavin’s ring. After a time, someone placed a hand on her shoulder. Startled, she looked up.
“You okay?” Brooke said, settling next to her.
“Yeah. No. Maybe.” Amandine buried her face in her hands. “Damn it.”
“What did she say?”
Amandine told Brooke everything. As she went through it, she realized Catherine was right. Amandine would never know the true reason Gavin wanted to keep her. He was always so busy, and babies took a lot of time and effort. Countless children grew up with divorced parents. Meredith hadn’t even bothered to get married before having a kid, and no one from his family seemed to care.
So why was he insisting on staying together? “Avoiding personal defeat” seemed like a feeble excuse, something he’d made up on the fly so he didn’t have to give her the real reason.
And if it weren’t, why should she care about his personal defeat? Catherine was right. What about Amandine’s future? What about what she wanted? She needed more than “avoiding personal defeat” to stay with Gavin. If he hadn’t figured out that nothing less than love would do after three years and three months…
“I hate to say it, but Catherine has a point,” Brooke said. “You deserve a man like the one she talked about. You shouldn’t stay with a guy who doesn’t love you just because you’re pregnant.”
Amandine rubbed her temples. She’d been content, even hopeful, until Catherine had shown up. If only she could erase everything her cousin had said from her memory…
Eighteen more years. Did she want to spend that much time with a man who didn’t love her just because they had a baby together? What would she do if she realized her situation was really hopeless? Would she have the courage to start over?
Even if she did, would it be possible in her mid-forties?
Gavin stalked inside, his face dark and grim.
Amandine forced a smile. “How was your visit? Everything go well?”
He nodded. “As expected. Mother sends her regards.”
“Luna’s making dinner.”
“I don’t have time.”
Of course .
“I have to return to the office soon,” he added.
No surprise there , either . “I’ll ask her to pack something for you then.” When she started to rise, Gavin stopped her.
“Brooke, can you give us a moment?” he asked.
“Sure.” She left.
Gavin sat next to Amandine. “What did Catherine say?” His gaze bore into hers, like he could will her thoughts to surface on her face.
“This and that.” She shrugged. “She wanted to return your wedding band.” Amandine handed it to him. “So now you have two.”
“That I do.” He stared at the original ring, then took the replacement off and put it in his jacket pocket. He threaded the original ring onto the finger.
“I thought about what you asked me last night and… I’m wondering why you married me.” She looked at him, at the old ring now back on his hand, hoping and waiting.
He looked back at her, his dark gaze shuttered.
“Why, Gavin? You could’ve married anybody. It didn’t have to be me.”
He hesitated, then finally said, “I thought you’d make a good wife. You’re smart and loyal and—”
“I’m not a dog, Gavin.”
“I never said you were.”
She jumped to her feet, hugging herself. “You might as well have. Your actions have proved it over and over again. I was just too stupid to see it.”
“Amandine, you’re upset.”
“Upset? I’m furious!” She flung an arm. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to be constantly pushed onto others because your husband can’t be bothered? You started hiring people to groom me, feed me—dress me, for fuck’s sake—like I’m some kind of helpless puppy.”
“That’s not—”
“Did you really think Josephine could fix me?”
“Jesus, I thought having clothes selected for you would lessen your workload after you started doing all those fundraisers and charity work.”
“No. You hired her so she could make sure I wouldn’t wear anything that would embarrass you.”
“Oh for— Amandine, wear whatever you like. Okay?”
“How can I, when Josephine doesn’t buy anything that I like?”
“Then tell her what you want.”
“She only listens to you.”
“Then fire her!”
“How am I going to fire somebody you hired without consulting me? She works for you, not me.”
Gavin rubbed his face. “We’re a couple, Amandine. We’re supposed to be able to talk about stuff like this if it’s been bothering you so much.”
She folded her arms. “When?”
“What?”
“When are we supposed to talk about it? When you’re at work? You never have time to talk. Our ‘movie nights’? They were your idea, but you hardly ever made it on time. And now you don’t come at all.” She started pacing. “For the love of god, Gavin, I didn’t even get to tell you I was pregnant! You had to find it out because I dropped a sonogram printout.”
“You had an opportunity to tell me—”
“When? In the private jet? Which you bought for…I don’t even know why you bought it since you know I don’t travel much. Or during our anniversary dinner? Oh wait, that’s right.” She snapped her fingers. “You were with Catherine.”
“Calm down, Aman—”
“I’m through being calm!” She slashed the air with her hand. “You always give me things to make up for the fact that you never have the time or the energy for me. I’m an afterthought, something you take for granted. But you won’t give me anything of yourself, not even the baby, since you’re going to take it from me if I decide to leave you. Ridiculous, isn’t it, when you and I both know that you don’t have the time for a baby.”
“That’s enough!” Gavin stood up. “What’s wrong with you? What the hell did Catherine say? That I came on to her? I did no such thing. She’s lying.”
“She didn’t have to tell me that. I trust you. I hope the feeling is mutual.”
“Yeah, well, I’m an expert on investing, and I’m not investing myself in anything or anyone I can lose. To Jacob, or anyone else. It’s not worth it,” Gavin said, then looked somewhat surprised, as though it wasn’t something he’d ever planned to speak out loud.
Suddenly it dawned on Amandine. She’d heard whispers of Jacob stealing Gavin’s girlfriends. He’d ended up with Catherine, too. Amandine had assumed it was just a rumor, but maybe not. “You think I’d leave you for Jacob?”
Breaths sawed in and out of Gavin. “Not for Jacob, no.”
How could she have not seen how hopeless their situation was? If she’d had the guts to speak her mind sooner, they would’ve avoided wasting so much time. “Nothing can make me leave you except yourself. I married you because I loved you,” she spoke through the cold lump in her throat. “There’s no point in continuing this joke of a reconciliation anymore. I’m going to divorce you, Gavin. And no, you cannot have the baby. I’m going to fight for it with everything I have. I’m entitled to at least that much.” If I can’t have your love , I want to have something of you —the baby we created together , so I can give it all the love in my heart . “But you can keep your money. All of it. I don’t want it.”
“Amandine…”
“I can’t live with you like this, Gavin. I’m not happy.”
His Adam’s apple worked. “Are you…are you truly unhappy? With me?”
She nodded, closing her eyes with the pain of her heart splintering. “I’m miserable, Gavin. I can’t live my life feeling…unwanted.”
It took a while before he finally said, “I see. I’ll have my lawyer call yours.”
When she opened her eyes, he was gone.
* * *
Gavin stumbled into the Bentley waiting outside. “Office,” he croaked.
If Thomas noticed anything odd, he didn’t comment. The car pulled smoothly away.
Gavin’s head rolled listlessly until it rested against the back of the leather seat. His gut twisted as he replayed her words. He’d never known he’d made her so miserable. She knew she was risking a nasty legal battle by trying to take the baby with her, and still she didn’t care, so long as she could be free of him.
He racked his brain. Where had he gone wrong? Had his mother been right, and it was a case of too little too late? Was it something Catherine had said?
He’d focused most of his life on work, trying to multiply his wealth and his clients’ in every way he knew how. He was good at it too, and beating the market—winning—made him feel like a god. It was as addictive as cocaine, and he craved the high from each victory.
But it wasn’t worth making Amandine miserable.
His mother was right. What could he do with another twenty billion? He should’ve paid more attention, listened to his gut, and realized Amandine was not at all like the other women out there, like Damien had said. It shouldn’t have taken this long for Gavin to realize he’d been a bad husband, who took advantage of Amandine’s good, accommodating nature.
He sighed. No matter how much Gavin wanted to hold Catherine responsible for poisoning his marriage, he ultimately had nobody but himself to blame. If he hadn’t been so blind, Catherine wouldn’t have been able to influence Amandine. And Amandine wouldn’t have decided to cut her losses.
What should I do?
He was good at finding out what needed to be done. But now no matter how he examined the problem, there was only one course of action left for him to take, except it would’ve been preferable to stick his finger in a live socket.
Closing his eyes against the ache in his heart, he pulled out his phone and dialed Craig’s number.
“Gavin. What’s going on?” Craig asked, not wasting time with how are you? s. Clients didn’t call this late at night when they were doing well.
“Amandine wants to leave me. Told me to keep all my money.”
“Congratulations.”
A bitter taste spread in his mouth. What kind of lawyer congratulated his client on an impending divorce he didn’t want? “I intend to provide a large settlement for her.”
“Why? I thought you said she didn’t want any money.” Gavin could hear a fiduciary scowl in Craig’s voice.
“It’s something I’m offering. That’s the least I can do.”
“All right. Depending on how much is on the table…could be a pretty smart strategy. That way she can’t change her mind about money later and claim you took advantage.”
Gavin’s hand tightened around the phone. He hated Craig’s reasonable voice. Never mind he was just doing his job. “She can have half my assets.”
Craig sputtered. “Half! That’s way too much, Gavin. Half a percent is plenty enough, given the prenup.”
“Just do it. That’s why I hired you.”
“You hired me to give you good legal advice.”
“I am the client.”
Craig sighed. “You sure you don’t want to think it over? There’s no rush.”
“No. My mind’s made up. But there are some conditions. Here are the most important ones…”
