My phone buzzes, but I don’t glance at it. Mom is sitting across from me. Viola is beside me. It’s so quiet that I can hear each coarse breath rattling in my lungs.
“What happened last year, mom?” Viola whispers. “What happened that night?”
“That night… I decided to take a shortcut home when I heard grunting and the sounds of a struggle.” She inhales deeply, fingers moving into her pocket for a cigarette.
Viola leans forward.
I hold my breath as mom puffs out smoke.
“I should have run away, but I didn’t. Stupid of me. But I did the next best thing. I hid behind a dumpster and stayed out of sight. When I heard things go quiet, I figured the fight was done and the guys had left.”
“And?” Viola croaks.
“I was wrong.” Mom’s brown eyes glaze over as if she’s reliving the moment. “There he was. Covered in someone’s blood. Knife in his hand. Looked like the devil come to life. And he was staring right at me.”
Viola shivers.
I frown. I don’t know if I believe her.
I don’t believe anything that comes out of her mouth.
But Viola is transfixed.
“If you witnessed a murder, why didn’t you tell the police? Why run away and play dead?” My sister’s eyes are earnest. A glimmer of her innocence rising from the ashes.
I’d be relieved—but that innocence is bordering on naïveté. An ignorance that would allow a child to play with fire.
Or with a snake.
“You know my history,” mom says, sighing in a way that makes her look pitiful and frail. “I’ve been in and out of rehab. No matter what I said, the police wouldn’t have believed me. And I couldn’t take the chance. What if that guy came after you two? He didn’t seem like the type to let a witness walk.”
I scoff.
Mom pretends not to hear. “I made the choice that would keep you both safe and, thankfully, Cadey agreed to cover for me.”
“I guess you both didn’t feel the need to share that with me.”
I open my mouth but mom steps in before I can. “Sweetheart, we just wanted to keep you safe. That’s all.”
Viola’s eyes soften on mom.
“If the situation was so dire, how is it okay to come back now? Isn’t that guy still out there?”
“I’ve already proven that I’m not going to be a problem.” Mom taps the cig on the table and it burns out. “I could have gone to the police by now, but I didn’t. And the case is closed. There were no witnesses. I’m free and clear.”
“Are you sure? It feels a little too easy.”
“I’m very sure.” Mom’s eyes dart to the side. Her hands are getting fidgety. Some would call it a sign of nerves, but I know exactly what that means.
It’s been too long since she’s gotten a hit. The cigs aren’t keeping her urges at bay anymore.
“Everything is fine now.” Mom smiles and pulls her hands under the table. Probably to scratch. Sometimes, she scratched herself to the point of bleeding. It was the scariest thing to see as a kid. No six-year-old wants their mom to be hurt, but when she’s the one inflicting her own pain…
“Vi, it’s time for bed.” I check my watch. “It’ll be hard to wake up for school tomorrow.”
Mom rises. “I’ll get some rest too.”
“Where are you going?” I stop her with a cold look.
“To bed.”
“We only have two bedrooms.”
“Mom can room with me,” Viola says.
“Absolutely not.”
“She’s right,” mom agrees. “I’ll take Cadence’s room. You and Viola can bunk together like you did before I left.”
My mouth pinches tightly. “You’re not—”
“Please.” Viola touches my arm and gives me a pleading look. “Mom’s supposed to be dead. She can’t just get a motel room. And it’s not like we haven’t slept on the same bed before.”
Everything inside me wants to argue, but I can tell that this means a lot to Vi.
“Fine,” I give in.
Mom smiles.
“Just for one night.”
“Of course.” Her eyes glitter.
The alarm bells in my head won’t stop ringing. Letting mom back into our lives is the last thing I should do.
But what other choice do I have? Turn her back onto the streets so she gets into more trouble? What happens if the police find out I helped disguise her death? What if they start investigating further and realize that we live alone? Or worse… live with an active drug addict who faked her own death? Will they take Viola away from me?
I can’t risk that happening.
Besides, I don’t believe mom gave us the full story tonight. Something isn’t adding up and the only way to make sure her stupid decisions won’t come back to bite me and Vi is to ask more questions.
I glare mom’s way. “Refrain from stealing anything in my room while I’m sleeping.”
Mom laughs. “Goodnight, Cadey.”
I follow Vi down the hall and tug her into the bathroom, insisting that she brush her teeth. She’s half-sleeping when I put her to bed and pull the comforters over her.
“I really hate you for keeping it a secret, Cadey,” Vi mumbles, half-conscious.
My heart pricks. “I know.”
“You always do things alone,” she murmurs, her eyes sinking further shut. “You always take the pain by yourself.”
“I’m okay.” I run my fingers over her hair.
“I want to help you,” Vi mumbles.
Damn it, Cadey. I want to help you. Dutch’s voice rings through my memories.
Did he mean it? Is that even possible? He spent every day making my life a living hell. Now, suddenly, he wants to help me?
I chew on my bottom lip until another thought strikes.
Dutch.
Ring box.
Super expensive diamond cut engagement ring.
Mere inches away from a drug addict with nothing to lose.
As Viola sinks deep into slumber, I tear a path down the hallway. Thankfully, I see the bathroom door is shut, which means mom isn’t in my bedroom.
I throw the door open and stalk to the dresser. Shifting under my panties, I feel around until my fingers hit a velvet box.
Yes.
It’s still there.
“What are you looking for?” Mom’s voice echoes behind me.
I jolt and quickly shove the ring box into the pocket of my school skirt. Pretending to shuffle around in the clothes, I murmur, “Underwear. I want to shower before I change into my pajamas.”
“I see.” Mom gives me a knowing smile.
Tugging at the hem of my skirt, I clear my throat. “I meant it, mom. You only get one day under this roof. Go back to wherever you’ve been hiding the past few months.”
“Was it here?” Mom sits on the edge of my bed and bounces on the mattress. She eases back, arms falling behind her.
“What are you talking about?” I huff. Did she even hear what I said?
“Did you have sex here? On this bed?” Her smile gets a little more excited. “Right here?”
My nostrils flare. I can’t do this with her.
Turning, I stride for the door.
“He should have taken you to a nice hotel. Candles. Music. A little romance. You deserved the five star treatment, especially since you were holding your virginity tight with those pretty piano fingers.”
I put my hand on the door knob.
Turn.
Open.
“With a car like that, he could afford flowers at least.”
I stop in my tracks.
Panic seizes my throat.
I whirl around as my chest heaves in fear. “What? What car?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know.”
“Mom!” I shriek.
She curls into the bed and closes her eyes. “I’m tired. It’s been a long day, Cadey.”
I stalk over to her and wrench her to a sitting position.
Mom yelps and claws at my hand. “That hurts!”
I don’t care.
My face bears down over hers and I hiss, “Whatever you think you saw, whatever you think you know about me, you’re wrong. You stay out of my life, do you hear me?”
“Strong, brave, perfect Cadey.” Her eyes turn dark and calculating. “Did attending that fancy school make you think that you’re as privileged as them? Did you forget who you are?”
She laughs in my face. Her dank breath wafts over me and makes me sick to my stomach.
“You came from me. You and I are in the same boat. And if you have even a hope of climbing out of this hell, you’re taking me with you.”
I release her shoulder and back away from the bed.
Her words are too cryptic for me to understand, but I know two things with distinct clarity.
Mom has no intentions of leaving this apartment.
And she has plans… plans that involve Dutch.
