A few days ago, Fitz was the one avoiding me. Now we’re avoiding each other.
If he’s in the living room with Hollis and Hunter, then I’m in my bedroom. If I’m in the kitchen, then he’s somewhere else. Our townhouse turns into a pathetic game of Musical Chairs: The Room Edition, as we do everything in our power not to share the same space or breathe the same air.
But maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe I shouldn’t be anywhere near him. Because when I am, I’m either touching his dick or sucking it, and I refuse to let that happen again.
As usual, Fitz and the guys have already left for practice by the time I’m ready to head to campus. I have another check-in with Hal Richmond this morning. Yay. Fun times. Can’t wait.
I drive to Briar and park behind the admin building, but I don’t get out of the car yet. I’m fifteen minutes early, and damned if I’m going to spend any extra time with Froghole. Instead, I crank the heat, load up an old playlist, and start singing along to One Direction’s “No Control.”
I’m still humming the same song ten minutes later on the way to the dean’s offices. Man, why did 1D ever break up? They were so frigging magical.
“Get back together already,” I moan, at the same time that a dark-haired girl rounds the hall corner.
She jumps in surprise. “Sorry, what?”
I wave my hand flippantly. “I was talking to 1D. They need to get back together.”
She shakes her head, visibly saddened. “I know. It’s heartbreaking.”
As much as I’d love to spend the rest of the day—hell, the rest of my life—discussing the huge hole that the loss of One Direction left in my soul, I force myself to keep walking. I can’t afford to be late. Each time I see Froghole, I swear he’s even more condescending. It’s like he goes home every night and practices all the things he can say to make me feel like dog poop under his shoe.
Today, he doesn’t disappoint. The patronizing attitude makes an appearance before my butt even hits the visitor’s chair, as he asks how my dad’s golf game with Dean Prescott went this past weekend. “Must be nice being able to fly to Florida just for the day to get a round in.” His tone isn’t overtly sarcastic, but his eyes tell a different story.
I stiffly reply that I don’t keep track of my father’s golf or travel schedule, and proceed to give him an update about each of my courses.
When we get to History of Fashion, Froghole leans back in his plush chair and asks, “How are you liking Professor Laurie? You know, he received several plum offers to teach at the other Ivys, but he chose Briar partly because of me.”
“Because of you,” I echo, hoping my skepticism doesn’t show on my face.
“My mum attended North London Collegiate with Anna Wintour. Fancy that, right?” His fake accent becomes more pronounced. At least, I still think it’s fake. My dad never got back to me with proof of Froghole’s birthplace.
“Fancy that,” I say with a faint smile.
“Anyhow, they’ve remained in touch over the years. Anna made an appearance at Mum’s birthday celebration last year. Erik tagged along, and I convinced him that Briar would be the best fit for someone of his renown.”
“Cool.” I honestly can’t think of anything else to say.
“I assume you’re enjoying his course?”
“Sure. It’s fine.”
“Just fine?” He tilts his head. “Based on the feedback we’ve received thus far, it sounds like it’s a smashing success.”
“The class itself is interesting.” Hesitation washes over me as I debate whether to go on.
Maybe I should say something about the winking. And the touching. The shoulder squeezes, the hand caresses. His fingers on the back of my neck.
But Mr. Richmond already doesn’t like me very much, and I’m not sure what his reaction would be.
Tell him.
My mom’s voice fills my head, urging me to be direct. I know that’s what her advice would be. Mom never holds anything back.
“I enjoy the subject matter,” I continue, before stopping to take a deep breath. “But…Professor Laurie…” I exhale in a rush. “He’s a bit creepy, if I’m being honest.”
Richmond narrows his eyes. “Creepy?”
“Yes.” My mouth suddenly feels dry, but my palms are clammy. I wipe them on the front of my jeans. “He touches my hand a lot, and my shoulders, and his gaze stays on me a little too long—”
“You must be misunderstanding,” Richmond interrupts. “Erik is a friendly chap. That’s one of the reasons everybody adores him.”
I bite my lip. “That’s what I thought at first—that he was just being friendly. But I think it’s more than that. I don’t like it when he touches me. I find it inappropriate—”
“Summer,” the assistant dean interrupts.
“Yes?”
“As a beautiful girl, I’m sure you’ve grown accustomed to being admired, perhaps often enough that it’s led to the assumption that when someone is acting in a friendly manner or paying extra attention to you, there’s an admiring or sexual connotation to it—”
My jaw falls open in shock.
“However, I’m certain that you’re misinterpreting whatever signals you believe Professor Laurie is sending.” He leans forward in his chair and clasps his hands on the desktop. “Do you realize that throwing around statements such as these could seriously threaten and potentially destroy someone’s career?”
My own hands aren’t damp anymore. They’re dry as dust, and I curl them into tight fists on my lap. “I’m not trying to destroy anyone’s career. I…”
“Would you like to lodge a formal complaint? If so, we can begin the process right now. You should be aware, however, that it can often be a lengthy process, as well as difficult for all parties involved.”
My eyes start to feel hot. “I, um…”
Impatience lines his forehead. “Summer. Will you be lodging a formal complaint against Professor Laurie?”
After a long moment of indecision, I say, “No.”
“I see.” Richmond rises from his chair. “Well, do let me know if you change your mind. Until then, I advise you to be prudent before making these kinds of accusations—”
“I wasn’t making accusations,” I protest. “You asked what I thought of him, and I told you he makes me uncomfortable.”
Richmond rounds his desk. “I’ll see you next week, Summer. Let me walk you out.”
Later in the afternoon, I’m still smarting over Froghole’s dismissive behavior. But at the same time, I’m also starting to question myself. The descriptions I’d given Richmond sound kind of flimsy when I replay them in my head.
He touches my hand a lot, and my shoulders, and his gaze stays on me a little too long.
That doesn’t exactly scream “highly inappropriate behavior!” The more I think about it, the more I wonder if maybe my original assessment of Laurie was correct, and he’s simply a very friendly man. The fact that Richmond openly admitted that Laurie is known for being a “friendly chap” only makes me doubt myself more. If the assistant dean doesn’t think Laurie’s friendliness is anything to be concerned about, maybe I shouldn’t either?
Ugh. I honestly don’t know.
“Ow!”
Madison, the sophomore whose measurements I’m taking, jerks in discomfort, alerting me to the fact that I’d cinched the tape way too tight around her boobs.
“Sorry,” I say hastily, loosening the hold. “Let me finish with the bust, and then we’re all done.” I look over at Bianca, who’s sprawled on the ornate couch flipping through the latest issue of Vogue. “Thanks so much for agreeing to do this, by the way. I think it’ll be a blast.”
“Thanks for asking us. I’m super excited,” Bianca admits.
“Me too!” Madison bounces on the heels of her socked feet. “I can’t believe you convinced the football team to walk the runway in Speedos.”
“Not the whole team. Just six of the players.” I wink at her. “Six very hot players.”
Her expression lights up. “Oh my God. I can’t wait for the after-party.”
When Bianca messaged me to say she and five sisters were down to model in my show, I’d sweetened the pot by telling them they were all invited to the after-party. Not the official Briar-hosted one, but the after-after-party with the football team. I already got Rex to agree to host us. All I had to say was “sorority girls” and he was on board.
“I can’t wait to see the final designs,” Bianca gushes. “The pics you sent of the sketches are so hot.”
“Yeah, they’re boss,” Madison agrees.
“Thanks. I’m excited to see them on you guys.” I jot down Madison’s bust measurement and then roll up the measuring tape. I tuck it and my little notepad into my Prada tote. “All right. Perfect. I’ve got everything I need. Next time I’m here, we’ll do a proper fitting and—”
“What the hell is going on?” Kaya appears in the doorway, suspicion darkening every inch of her pretty face.
“Hey, Kaya,” I say cheerfully.
Bianca warily gets off the couch, while Madison scurries out of the room like an animal that’s just sensed a thunderstorm brewing.
Kaya glares at me. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to take some measurements.” I sling my purse strap over my shoulder and root around inside the bag for my phone.
“What for?”
“For none of your business,” I chirp.
Bianca makes it Kaya’s business quickly enough. “Some of the girls and I are walking in Summer’s fashion show.”
“Well,” I hedge in, “it’s not my show. The Fashion department does this every March.”
Kaya ignores me. She’s too busy staring Bianca down. “Why would you walk in her fashion show?”
Bianca falters for a beat. “Because it sounded like fun.”
“So fun that you didn’t think to ask me if I wanted to do it too?”
I arch an eyebrow at the huffy girl. “Would you like to model in my show, Kaya?”
“Absolutely not.”
It’s hard not to roll my eyes, but somehow I manage to restrain myself.
“I just feel like I should have been informed about this before you agreed,” she says stiffly. “I’m the president of this sorority, Bianca. Anything a Kappa does has the power to reflect poorly on me.”
“Chill out, Kaya. It’s just a fashion show, and it will look great for the house, I promise. We’re helping out a fellow student. Nationals likes it when we show community spirit.”
“How many of you said yes?” Kaya demands.
“Six of us.”
“Six? Oh my God. I can’t believe you all agreed and not a single person told me!”
“Because it had nothing to do with you.”
I edge toward the door. “Um. I’m going to take off now—”
“After everything I went through with Daphne! You know how upset I was when I found out she was going behind my back, and now you’re doing the same thing?”
“No one is going behind your back,” Bianca coos. She gives me a look that says, Get out of here while you can.
I make my escape, fleeing through the front doors of the house that, instead of Kappa Beta Nu, should be called DAPHNE KETTLEMAN WAS HERE, because holy shit did that girl leave her mark on this place.
As I’m unlocking my car, “Cheap Thrills” blares out of my purse. I fish out my phone and flip it over to check the screen.
Hunter.
I answer with an overly bright, “Hey.”
“Blondie. Hey.”
The sound of his husky voice triggers a rush of guilt. Saturday night is fast approaching, and I’ve been stalling in telling him it’s Valentine’s Day. Because he’ll either want to go anyway, or reschedule, and I don’t even know if I want to keep the date.
“So. I was just informed that I scheduled our date on Valentine’s Day.” He snickers. “My bad.”
I laugh in relief. “Okay, thank God. I was going to say something about it, because, yeah…I don’t know if V-Day is the best idea for a first date.”
“No, I totally get it. That’s a lot of pressure.”
“We should probably reschedule,” I say, even more relieved now. Maybe I can put this off indefinitely, or at least until I figure out how I feel about him.
Hunter throws a wrench in that plan by suggesting, “How about tonight?”
I gulp. “Tonight?”
“Yeah. No game, and I don’t have plans. Do you?”
“No.” Crap. Why did I say no? Now there’s no reason for me not to go.
“So let’s do it. Dinner?
“Sure,” I concede.
“Cool. I’ll pick you up at your place.”
Another laugh pops out. “That was so lame.”
“I know.” He chuckles. “Should we leave around seven?”
“Sounds good.” I hope he doesn’t hear the note of uncertainty in my voice.
“Later, Blondie.”
After we hang up, I instantly call my mother.
“Sweetie!” She sounds overjoyed. “You caught me at a good time. I just got out of a meeting.”
“I’m having man problems!” I blurt out.
There’s a second of silence, and then, “Okay, baby. Hit me.”
Laughter bubbles in my throat. I love this woman. “I have a date with one of my roommates tonight. Hunter. He went to Roselawn, but he was a year behind me.”
“All right…” I can practically see the deep furrow between her eyebrows as she absorbs my words. “Are you nervous about the date?”
“No, not really. But…” I let out a breath. “I kissed my other roommate.” Among other things. But what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.
“You kissed him before the date?”
“No, I didn’t kiss the one I’m going out with. Well, I did, but that was a while ago. On Saturday I kissed the other one.”
“Hunter.”
“No. Fitz.”
“Fizz?”
“Fitz!” I sputter. “Colin Fitzgerald. Mom, keep up.”
“Sorry, Summer, but maybe I’d have an easier time keeping up if your love life wasn’t like an episode of The Bachelor.”
“The Bachelorette,” I correct. “Okay. Pay attention. Hunter is the one I’m having dinner with tonight. Fitz is the one I kissed.”
“I see. And you have feelings for both of them?”
“Yes?”
“Is that a question?”
“No? I mean, I don’t know. I really don’t know.”
“Well, I’m not sure what to say to you, sweetie. You’re skimping on both the context and the details. I suppose pick the one you like more?”
“Mom! That doesn’t help at all,” I grumble. “Whatever. I’ll figure it out on my own.” I mimic her crappy suggestion. “Pick the one you like more. Come on, Mom. Get it together.”
Her laughter tickles my ear. “Hey, it’s all I’ve got. Call me later. Let me know how everything shakes out.”
Wonderful. Usually my mother dispenses the sagest advice in the world. Today she gives me nothing. Even grammatically incorrect fortune cookies offer better solutions than pick the one you like more.
Besides, it’s not a matter of liking. Half the time I’m not sure I even like Fitz. He drives me bananas most of the time. But I’m drawn to him, and he’s on my mind constantly, a lot more than Hunter is.
In all honesty, I wouldn’t be considering going out with Hunter if Fitz came up to me and said, “Let’s do this.”
But Fitz isn’t saying that. He isn’t saying anything, except that he’s “bad at expressing feelings” and “not good at this shit.”
What the hell am I supposed to do with that? Beg him to magically be good at “this shit”? Forget that.
Hunter is a great guy, and we get along so well. What’s the harm in getting to know him better?
You’ll be leading him on.
Not necessarily. Maybe we’ll have so much fun on the date that my feelings for Hunter will eclipse my feelings for Fitz.
Or that won’t happen at all, and you’ll be leading him on.
Do I keep the date or cancel it? I have no idea what to do.
I’m still debating it when I take a shower later. A worry-free shower, thanks to the new lock Hollis installed on the bathroom door.
I’m still debating it as I dry my hair and get dressed. I pair a dove-gray sweater dress with black stockings and Jimmy Choo lace-up combat boots, black suede.
I’m still debating it when Hunter calls out from downstairs that he’s warming up the car.
And I’m still debating it when Fitz enters my bedroom without knocking and levels me with two husky words.
“Don’t go.”
