plopped down onto a seat as the chatter stops in the dining room. I’m still gathering my bearings as Darius takes a seat at the head of the table next to me, a smirk upon his face as he starts putting food onto a plate.
“Uhh, well that’s different,” Damian mutters across the table.
I huff. “You’re telling me, I can’t seem to walk on my own recently.” I give Darius the stink-eye. This habit of his of throwing me over his shoulder needs to stop.
“I like looking at your as—“ I growl, cutting Darius off as his eyes heat.
“Stop putting me off my meal,” Leo grumbles into his food.
A nudge at my side harbors my attention. “You good?” Josh asks, eying me and Darius like we’ve lost our heads. Maybe we have, at least I think Darius has or he gained a new personality. Who the fuck knows at this point, only things have changed between us. Sarah giggles at Josh’s side and he immediately leans into her, nuzzling her neck.
“This is a new development,” Sarah says, giving Josh a lovesick smile.
“It’s something alright,” Leo mumbles around a piece of meat, and I glance his way. “Did you suck him good? I’ve never seen him so relaxed.” I glare, my hands tightening in my lap as Darius’s head whips his way, his own stare hard on the side of Leo’s face.
“Jealous you’re not getting any?” Zaide chimes in, his knife in hand as he sharpens it, not even bothering to look up. I didn’t know he was back. I thought he would still be trying to find the crystal.
“Ha,” Seb laughs. “Don’t worry, blondie, I’m sure you can have a good shower session worthy of an orgy after we have watched Darius and Rhea eye fuck each other after dinner.”
“The fuck?” I sputter, my eyes wide. We don’t eye fuck.
Seb leans forward so I can see him down the table, that twinkle in his eyes never leaving. “Come on, Rhea, baby,” he coos, and Darius halts the piece of meat he was putting on his plate, growling low at Sebastian. “Oh, would you look at that, he’s got it bad.”
“The only thing I got bad is the urge to put my hands around your neck,“ Darius tells him, the low tone of his voice a warning but it only makes Sebastian smile even more.
“Gods,” Colten whispers to Hudson. “I knew it was coming but I didn’t realize how deep it ran.”
“It was easy to see, pup,” Hudson replies. “Now eat more, we have training later. Taylor is already out there waiting with Jerrod.” Colton mumbles something else, but does as Hudson says. I pretend I don’t notice. Those two need to just jump bones already.
I’m still smiling at them as a plate is put in front of me and I look down, the confusion plain to see on my face when I look up at Darius. He ignores me and goes about getting another plate and piling on food while I stare at him.
Darius sets his own plate down and finally looks at me. Something heady stays in his eyes as he looks between me and the plate, a silent command, telling me without words that this is how things will be from now on. That he will provide for me and he is showing others exactly what he sets out to do also.
This is more than the blood oath we gave, more than a tentative truce, more than our confessions. This is more than anything I have ever known. All from just receiving a plate of food.
I swallow and look at my plate and dig in to the large amounts of meat and fruit, ignoring Darius as he watches me intently. The table is silent, they’re also acknowledging what this means, what he’s declaring to everyone.
He will be the only one to give me food from now on.
“Did you get it?” Darius says, and my gaze follows his to Zaide who shakes his head. I pick up another slice of meat, the flavors exploding over my tongue and damn, I’ve never eaten such delicious meat before.
“I’ll try again soon,” Zaide replies and my mood sours a little that the memory crystal still hasn’t been found. I need to see it.
Darius nods. “We are awaiting news of some information that could lead us to those that were stolen and Rhea’s pack members,” Darius announces after a time, and heads shoot up, giving him their attention.
“Where did you get this information?” Leo asks, running a hand through his blond hair.
Darius turns to me. “Rhea’s friend.“ He says the word ‘friend’ like he’s just eaten wolf shit, and I give him a warning look. Josh turns to me, asking an unvoiced question.
“Edward sent Ilium to me, left a note saying—“ The link goes dead and I let out an aggravating breath at Darius. “Will you stop doing that!” I seethe. “How do you even do it? You never tell me.”
“Why would I tell you, so you can stop it from happening?” He raises a brow and leans back in his chair. “I told you not to have private conversations around me.”
“Ugh, you’re so annoying.” I turn to Josh. “Yes, Edward. He said he will try and contact me again soon.” He nods and takes a hold of Sarah’s hand tightly, a look passing between them.
“We will leave when we receive word. In the meantime, Zaide and Damian will no doubt be summoned to Wolvorn by the Highers to be questioned about their time in Zakith. When that happens, we lay-low but be ready to send some Elites out on a hunt.”
“Then we go hunting them,” Damian says.
“They should have learned loyalty,” Zaide muses.
“They should have.” Darius taps his fingers on the table. “Make sure you get armor for everyone, Damian. We will keep training for now as we wait. We haven’t heard from Charles yet, but I don’t think it will be long before he asks about Maize.”
“I doubt we have much time,” Leo says. “And if we do receive news of the others whereabouts, they may not even be alive when we reach there.”
“Don’t fucking say that,” Hudson growls, looking at me out the corner of his eye while I slowly pick at my food, eyes on my plate.
“I’m speaking truthfully,” Leo defends himself. “We all know it’s possible.”
Swallowing roughly, I eat slowly. Three months ago I was in Eridian, working toward winter and trying to get through to Kade about letting Axis have more control than he should. Now I’m here, at the Elites’ keep, with not even half of my pack, eating a delicious meal given to me by the Alpha of Elites, and my pack is out there somewhere, maybe dead, and Kade is in the clutches of the Highers and our family.
What am I doing?
“We don’t know anything yet, so there is no need to speculate,” Hudson says.
I shouldn’t just sit around like this.
“And you all need to be realistic in what we may find if we get a location,“ Leo barks back. “You need to prepare if they are all dead.”
I’m not even helping anyone right now.
“You will be dead if you don’t shut your mouth!” Josh shouts.
“Not before Rhea gets us killed when they find out that she killed Maize!”
I drop my fork, the clang of it ringing loud in the suddenly quiet space as everyone looks toward me. My vision turns hazy and my power rushes to the surface unexpectedly. So strong, angry, wild and free when it bursts out of me. Ice-blue whips around me, my hair floating. I can barely hear anything, and I can’t see anything as my power is rushing out of me uncontrollably.
Someone shouts, things crash and bang and split and all I feel is…. lost.
Why me, why them, why us. Why am I sitting here doing nothing while others suffer again?
Why, why, why.
Haven’t I given enough blood to this world? Enough tears, enough cries, enough fucking pain! Haven’t I given more than is due for the stain on my soul from what I had to do to make sure we all survived. Yet they are out there, alone, and I may have just caused more deaths by not controlling myself with Maize.
I’m not worthy of this power coursing through me that I cannot even control. I’m not worthy of the title Heir of Zahariss if I can’t even protect my family. I am not worthy of being the daughter of a mother who did all she could for me.
Tendrils flow over me as a wall of power keeps me encased inside. It ripples angrily, sparks spitting out of it as Runa comes to the surface. She’s angry, so angry at the world, so menacing with a snarl upon her face. Power flows over her, coating her like armor as she runs at me from within and I lurch forward, gripping the table in front of me tightly, retching from the force of her hitting me.
My thoughts are scattering between anger and despair, I can’t focus on one or the other as Runa continues her battle from within. Hitting me again and again to the point where I swear I feel her creeping out of my skin. I can’t pull my power back and I can’t hold her back.
Darkness leaks through my blue, misty tendrils creeping forward and reaching for me. But I can’t move, stuck still as pain slices through my body, holding me captive. I grit my teeth, breathing heavily through my nose as I try to call my magic back, but I can’t. It’s not listening. It won’t listen.
That’s when I start to panic. I can feel it taking more of me, leeching from me as my eyelids droop. I stare at the black, willing it to reach me, to get it to stop, to just make it stop. As if it can hear me, it springs through my wall of power in a burst of speed and hits me in my chest, forcing me to take a breath.
I wasn’t even breathing.
I suck in lungfuls of air as more and more black reaches me, and I welcome, wanting it to help me. I’m suddenly yanked from behind and lifted into a set of strong, familiar arms, the black fully covering the blue around us.
“What—“ I cough, gripping Darius as he holds me tighter. “I can’t, I can’t stop it,” I tell him, my body waning.
“Don’t worry, little wolf.” he says gently, his lips coming to the top of my head. “Sleep.”
“I’m sick…” I breathe, “of fucking… sleeping.” But I do, unable to help as my power takes all of me that I have to give and I succumb to exhaustion.
Again.
Shouting reaches me and I peel my eyes open, wincing at the light piercing me.
“This needs to fucking stop, she can’t control her power so she shouldn’t use it, its dangerous,” someone shouts.
“She’s learning, she isn’t fully with her wolf yet but when she is she will have control,” Darius tells them.
“She nearly took my fucking head off!” Leo growls, it must have been Leo that was shouting. “You can’t expect me not to defend myself from an attack. Even if I have to stab her to—“
His words are cut off and I move my sleep-ridden eyes to where Darius has him pinned against the wall by his throat. “Do not,” he says in a low, dangerous tone. “Finish that sentence if you want to walk out of here without bleeding.”
“Brother, you can’t be serious,” Leo coughs out, his eyes wide.
“Deadly, do not make me hurt you, Leo,” Darius warns, and then lowers his voice, speaking too quietly for me to hear. Whatever he says to Leo has his blue eyes snapping to me over Darius’s shoulder, an understanding in them that wasn’t there before. He nods, his eyes moving back to Darius when he lets him go.
“Okay, I got it,” Leo tells him, putting a hand on his shoulder before he walks out the room without another word.
“Hey,” Anna’s gentle voice says, and I turn toward her on the other side of the bed.
“Hey,” I croak, moving to sit up the best I can. Darius rushes forward and helps me settle back against the pillow, his face tense.
“Drink this,” Anna says, handing me a cup of something green that smells like shit. I wrinkle my nose and look at her. “It will help, I promise.” She smiles, moving her red hair over her shoulder and taking a seat on the bed next to me while I look at the green liquid, hoping it’ll disappear.
“Drink or I will force it down your throat,” Darius warns from my other side, arms folded as he watches me.
“Gods,” I mutter at his grumpiness. I pinch my nose and bring the cup to my lips, trying to ignore the thickness of the liquid and drink it as quickly as possible.
“Good girl,” Darius praises and now I scowl, trying to keep whatever I just drank down. “How long until she feels the effects?” he asks Anna while I settle deeper into the pillows with a sigh.
“Around an hour,” is all she says and squeezes my hand. “I’m worried about you, Rhea. This power of yours.” She shakes her head, frowning. “If you can’t get a grasp on it, it will take everything from you.”
“I’m trying,” I assure her. And I am.
“Everything comes with a price. Yours will be your life if you don’t get it under control soon,” she tells me and Darius growls, the room vibrating with the depth of it as he starts pacing the length of his bedroom.
“What?” I ask her, my heart pounding. I can’t die, my pack and Kade are still out there, and I fought too fucking hard to stay alive.
“You’re giving too much too quickly and running yourself dry. If you have nothing left and attempt to keep going, or in your case unable to stop, it will take all of you.” Her eyes shimmer with tears. “You just need your wolf to be one with you, Belldame told you as much.”
“She doesn’t want to come out to be whole.” I deflate, wondering where in the Gods I went wrong. Does Runa hate me? Hate me for what she went though?
“She does want to,” Darius tells me, still pacing the floor. “I felt it, she wants nothing more than to feel the ground beneath her feet. Fear is stopping her.” He runs his hands through his hair, his gaze burning a hole wherever it lands.
“Even so,” I say, eyeing him cautiously, “there isn’t much I can do if she won’t come out.”
“You need to push harder,” Darius growls.
“No,” I snap at him, baring my teeth. “I can feel her, it’s too much, she needs to rest, Darius.”
“She will be able to rest indefinitely if she doesn’t show herself because both of you will be dead!” he roars, the room rattling with it as I stare, my wide eyes connecting with him.
“Dar…” He shakes his head and storms out of the room, the bedroom door banging off the wall violently.
I sigh and lay back down, still exhausted on a soul level. Everything feels like it’s crashing down around me, one failure after another. Always something getting in the fucking way.
I didn’t know this time it would be myself.
“Rest, Rhea.” Anna pats my hand and I jolt, forgetting she was even here. She gives my hand a squeeze and collects her things before leaving the room.
Leaving me alone in my own silence.
I gently prod at Runa. She’s curled up asleep, just as exhausted as I am. My Heir power floats around her, blue sparks coming from it every now and again, never settling but not aggressive.
At the moment.
I don’t know what even happened in the dining room. My thoughts just spiraled and it just burst out of me. Well, my power did.
Did I nearly take Leo’s head off? Am I a danger to those around me?
That thought stops me cold. No, I won’t accept it. I can’t.
I need to figure it out, my pack is at stake. Kade’s life is at stake. They won’t hesitate to use him to get to me, they already did.
But I fear this time they would do something I can’t even attempt to repair.
I can’t raise the dead.
When you’re dead. You’re dead.
I won’t let them take his life, I fought too hard to give him one, and I won’t let this power inside of me take mine. There is too much left to do.
I look toward the door where Darius left, wondering if he’s right about Runa. He’s the only one who can help, and to do that, I need to truly let him in. I need to forgive him fully for what he did to me and move on. He said sorry, he spoke his truth, and I think I need to speak the rest of mine.
He’s my only float in the seas of my path at the moment, and I need to grab onto it and hold tight.
He’s the only hope I have of getting Runa out and I need to drop some walls to do so.
My pack is worth the sacrifice, Kade is worth the sacrifice of letting the person who is the most dangerous of all inside my walls that I have so carefully crafted.
Darius is the Heir of the destroyer, he would have taken my fortress down in time anyway.
Anna checks me over again and then I drink down more of that horrible drink before I wobble out of bed to go find Darius.
I find him in the library, his pacing still on form as he goes back and forth in front of the window. Light shines on him, his shadow seemingly thicker on the floor and I know his magic is pooling around him.
I close the door behind me, keeping him in my sights as he growls to himself. I sigh, rubbing my arms and shuffling forward, feeling the exhaustion down to my bones. Anna telling me I would die if I can’t get my magic under control wasn’t something I saw coming. I thought that I could learn to live with the way things are now seeing as though Runa won’t come out.
It seems I have no choice in what I need to do now, no matter my feelings.
I walk over to Darius, mindful of the tension brewing off of him. He seems angry, and I’m not sure at what.
Me, maybe?
“Darius?” He continues his pacing. I take another step, reaching out a hand to halt him. “Dariu–” He turns suddenly and then I’m on the desk, one of his large hands grasping my throat in a firm hold. My legs dangle on either side of his hips as he breaths harshly.
“She will come out of you whether you like it or not,” he snarls down at me while I blink up at him. My hand goes to his wrist, trying to pull his hand away from my throat but his hold is firm. “I don’t care for your feelings on the matter, whether you think it is cruel. I will drag her ass out of you!” His words are full of anger, but I detect a hint of something else in them. “I will not lose you to your own fucking power.”
“Darius,” I gulp, and he feels my swallow in his hand. His thumb moves over to my pulse point and his eyes draw toward it, fixated as he can feel it beat beneath my skin. “I know,” I tell him, and his eyes slowly come to mine. His hold on my neck softens slightly. “I know she needs to come out. I… I don’t want to die,” I tell him, and I feel the unwelcome sting at the back of my eyes. “I fought too fucking hard to stay alive,” I croak. “And though I loathe the thought of dragging Runa out when I know she doesn’t want to and it will hurt her, I can’t let this be the reason I become one with the lands. Not like that.”
Darius’s eyes close briefly, and he leans forward, his forehead resting against mine. He inhales deeply, his thumb still rubbing back and forth over my pulse as he just breathes me in. “You may hate me even more for what I may have to do to drag her out of you, but at least you will be alive to do it.”
I shake my head against his. “I don’t hate you, Darius,” I whisper, and he pulls back, moving to rest on his hands at either side of my head as he hovers above me. his brows furrow at my words, his eyes swimming with confusion. “You hurt me, you explained and you regret it. I believe you.” I bite my lip. “I believe all that you said down in the willows. I was angry and I said some things I didn’t mean, but Darius, I never hated you. How could I?” Not when he is who he is to me. Hate is not possible for us.
“I took away the ability for you to hate me,” he mutters, looking off to the side.
“No, the Gods did.” I reach up and hesitantly touch his face. He stills as I stroke his chin with a finger, feeling the stubble there as I scratch at it. I move to his lips next, running over them softly before I move to his cheek. Then I press my finger in harder, turning his head so he’s looking at me. I trace his nose and the small scar there next, before touching between his eyebrows and then running my fingers through his hair.
Touching seems like such a normal thing for many, but to us, this is new, something unfamiliar. I can’t say I don’t like it though. Being able to touch him freely feels like I’m taking a new breath of air after a long time.
Darius sighs, pausing for a moment before he tilts his head into my hand that’s in his hair, and I wonder how long it has been for him that someone touched him like this. Darius doesn’t seem the type of male who allows this type of… affection. He always said he never wanted a mate so I’m assuming he didn’t stay around and cuddle when he had… arrangements. Yet he stayed in bed with me, wrapped around me every night, probably so I wouldn’t try and kill him, but he still cuddled with me nonetheless. Or is it the same now, just being close to me because he needs me near to keep an eye on me?
Doubts start to rear their ugly head and I start to move my hand back. His own flies up and captures my wrist, keeping my hand in his hair as his gaze roams my face. He grunts at whatever he sees, and he leans down and rubs his nose against mine. I melt into the table, closing my eyes and soaking it up like a flower that needs the light. We stay like this for a while, my hand combing through his hair while he nudges my nose and face, breathing me in.
This is a moment of soft affection that I will store away in my precious memories, along with the others where it is Darius, and not the Alpha of Elites.
“Will you help me?” I ask him quietly, squirming a little at his nearness. “I don’t think I can get her out on my own.”
“I will help you, little wolf,” he murmurs against my neck, nipping slightly. “You only need to ask and I will do it.” He leans up again, a smirk resting upon his face. I will happily help you out with the other problem too.”
“What other problem?”
“The one where you won’t ask to be fucked, so I will take it upon myself to fuck you when I see fit.” I blink up at him. “Problem with that?” I hesitate before slowly shaking my head. “Then let’s get started, because I need to feel you wrapped around me.”
