1983, Vailburg
I scream at the top of my lungs that I can feel my own ears ringing in pain. The group of strong and rough hands of the doctors and male nurses. The two female nurses who have come to do their job are standing at the corner with their wide, horror filled eyes meeting my black ones.
“Get the Velcro straps! Hurry!” the doctor orders the nurses in his loud, gruff voice. The nurses didn’t waste a single second before dashing out of the room.
“Ah!” I scream again so that I nearly feel the nerves on my necks popping against my pale skin. Their fingertips now digging deeper into my skin, dark bruises will be left as a reminder for several days.
I writhe as hard as possible with all my might, not caring that my hair is a mess and the hospital gown is starting to ride up, exposing my bare legs.
Before I know it, I hear the faint snapping sound of the velcro as they start to tie me down to the bed. My legs are tightly bound against the bed posts, with no room for any movements. But the doctor, absentmindedly, let go of my hand, and using my chance I grab the nearest steel tray from the bedside table. Gripping it tightly, I hit as hard as possible against the side of the doctor’s head.
“Fuck!” he grunts in pain, instantly holding his head before he crouches. I hit him again, witnessing him fall face down on the floor with the nurses helping him.
With my free hand, I snap open the velcro straps, freeing myself before I hop out of the bed and head towards the door.
“Don’t let her get away!” I hear the doctor scream. Adrenaline fuels my fear and anxiety as I rush out of the room without a single glance over my shoulder. Breathing heavily, my wild eyes look around frantically for an exit…an escape. The corridor is empty like a desert with bright, plain lights brightening up the white walls and floors. The familiar smell of medicines and antiseptics fill my nostrils while I run down the hallway.
A vast door at the right side catches my sight. Ignoring my dry throat and thumping heart, I run towards the door. Heavy footsteps echo behind me, getting closer and closer. Hope for freedom starts to rush through me but it is instantly crushed like an innocent ant when the door doesn’t budge as I push it. I twist the handle frantically but it is pointless. Before I can think of another escape, those familiar strong hands engulf me back to be trapped where I escaped from.
I scream again, pulling away from their holds that I lose my footing and kneel on the floor. But it doesn’t bother them as they drag me down, ignoring my pleas and cry for help.
“Please, no! Don’t do this! No!” I yell with my voice echoing loudly in the hallway. I continue to writhe until we get back to the room. The doctor is slightly massaging his injured head when he glares at my return.
“Get her on the bed. Right now!” he barks at the nurses who carry me and lay me down with their vice grip.
But before I can even contemplate the situation, I feel the sting of the needle on my right arm. In the blink of an eye, my nerves start to turn weak, my body slackening as it feels weightless. My mind is losing control as everything around me starts to become blurry. The faint voices of the doctors and nurses reach my ears but I can’t grasp a single word. Bit by bit I’m breaking connection with sanity as darkness engulfs me into its arms.
I can’t move. My head, my chest…burning pain. Every inch of my body feels trapped…bound to darkness. It is dark everywhere.
Where am I?
I will myself to open my eyes but my body is defying me. I try to speak but I can’t feel my lips. Whispered voices reach my ears…listen to it. Listen. Damn it! Listen!
“She cannot be here anymore, Mr. Arthur.” It’s the doctor’s voice. But what is Tristen doing here? He can’t be here…he shouldn’t…
“You know well she has already been through a lot after losing her sister. After my wife’s death nothing has been the same for her. You have to help me, doctor, because this is my only option.”
No. Do not talk about her. Do not mention her name from your lips!
“Mr. Arthur, I understand your concern. But she was on the verge of losing control today. I can’t risk the reputation of my hospital and the safety of my employees because of your sister-in-law. I fear that what she is beyond us…perhaps she is…” his voice trails off.
“She is what?” Tristen asks.
“The nurses have heard her talk to herself about sins and demons in her room. She would look wildly every now and then at the walls. And some nights she would keep clawing her skin until it bleeds while she laughs hysterically. Her demeanor all points to the only conclusion that she may be possessed.”
“What! Have you gone insane, doctor-”
“I am stating the facts, Mr. Arthur. We all pray to God for our loved ones to be safe and healthy. We believe in His existence, so why can’t we believe in the existence of demons and the devil?”
There is silence for several seconds. “All I know is that Agatha cannot be in my hospital. I’m sorry, Mr. Arthur.”
“What do you propose then?” he asks.
The doctor sighs shakily before muttering his response, “There is a place I know that treats people like her. But it is far away from the Vailburg Hill’s range. No visitations are allowed until she is fully recovered. And there are nuns and priests who take care of the patients. And one of the priests there is a doctor who will be there twenty-four hours in case of emergencies.”
“Are you suggesting…” Tristen doesn’t finish his words and there is no other answer from the doctor as well, with the silence and suspense clawing within my heart.
“Oh, doctor. I will do everything in my power to make sure she is better. That is all I care for. Do not worry about the money or time, I will give them both.”
“Very well then. I will send them a letter first thing in the morning. We should have a response from them soon.”
The voices continue to whisper but they soon turn muted to my ears as darkness starts to shroud my soul again. But one thing I’m certain of is that the next time I open my eyes I won’t be here anymore.
I will be in an unknown place with strangers and being treated like a devil possessed woman. But I’m well aware of the place they are referring to. The name itself is like those horror stories children hear about from their grandparents, that I don’t want to think of. But I have no other choice…none.
The gates to this living hell will be opening for me.
I will soon be in the Magdalene.
