Three nights ago
It had to be a coincidence.
I knew that wasn’t true, but I kept telling myself it was as the Uber pulled away from the curb. If I didn’t, I was pretty sure I was going to vomit all over the poor guy’s backseat. I was completely freaked out.
The minute we pulled up to my apartment, I flew out of the car and raced for the elevator. When it didn’t come in two seconds, I decided I’d rather keep busy running up eight flights of stairs than stand waiting while the inside of my chest felt like a ticking time bomb.
In my apartment, I ran straight for my bedroom and dropped to the floor to pull out the plastic bins I kept stowed under my bed. In my panic, I couldn’t remember what the outside of the diary I was searching for looked like, or even which storage bin had the most recent books. So I grabbed the first container and started to yank them out one by one.
The first bin had at least thirty different diaries packed into it that I’d collected over the years, but none that were recent. I didn’t bother to put anything back before ripping the top off the next plastic container. Just a few books into that one, I lifted a red, leather-bound volume that sent a jolt of electricity through my body. Ten seconds ago, I couldn’t have identified it in a lineup, but the minute I held it in my hand, I knew. I just knew it was the one.
Unlike every other book I picked up, I didn’t immediately flip it open and rush to read. Instead, I took a deep breath and steadied myself as the seriousness of the situation hit me all over again. If what I suspected was right… Oh God, I know I’m right.
A wave of nausea rolled through me, and my hands shook as I cracked open the book and began to read.
Dear Diary,
This is the first page of a new book, which seems very fitting as I sit here and write today. I know it’s been a while since I last wrote, but all the pages in my old book were filled, and I hadn’t had anything good to write about to start a new one.
Happily, things have recently changed. Summer has been far from boring. In fact, I think this summer has been one of those that musicians write songs about. You see, I met the love of my life. He’s sweet and kind, but also sort of broody and tough. Back in May, when I got home from college, my parents dragged me to some boring party that one of their friends was throwing. I hadn’t wanted to go, but I’m damn glad I did because I met the man I’m going to marry someday!
More soon! ~A
I stopped to micro-analyze every word. Hudson hadn’t mentioned how he and his ex-wife had met specifically, but he’d said their families were friends and they’d run in the same social circle. I’d assumed H stood for husband, but it could also be Hudson.
As I pieced the puzzle together, everything fell into place.
My ex-roommate Evelyn had given me this diary for my birthday. Evelyn and Hudson’s ex-wife were friends. Maybe Alexandria had given her the diary for safekeeping, or who knows—maybe Evelyn had stolen it. Lord knows she had a penchant for taking things from friends.
Alexandria had gotten married at the New York Public Library—that I was certain of. I’d read every detail of her planning. Hudson had also gotten married there, just like his parents before him.
I was also 99.99-percent sure that the child Alexandria had written about was named Laken Charlotte. I remembered because it was the only time the writer had used anyone’s name but her own. Everywhere else she’d referred to people with initials, but on the day her daughter was born, she’d written her name. Laken Charlotte.
It wasn’t a common name, but I needed that extra hundredth of a percent of certainty, and I needed it now. No way I could keep reading from the beginning and wait until I got to that point. So I flipped frantically until I found the section I remembered.
Dear Diary,
Today I became a mother.
A mother.
I had to write that again because I still can’t believe it. The birth was all the gruesome stories of pain I’d heard, and then some. But the moment they laid my little girl in my arms, I forgot all about the agony of delivery. She’s perfect in absolutely every way.
At 2:42 today, my life changed. I took one look in my baby’s eyes and knew in my heart of hearts that I needed to be a better person. A stronger person. A more selfless person. An honest person. I’m so proud to be my sweet girl’s mother, and today I make the promise to become a person she can be proud of someday, too.
Welcome to the world, Laken Charlotte.
~A
I dropped the book to my lap and closed my eyes.
Hudson’s ex-wife was Laken Charlotte’s mother—Charlie’s mother. But unfortunately, that was all I could say for sure. Because according to other entries in her diary, that was all Alexandria could say for sure. She’d kept a secret from her husband—a big one.
This time, I couldn’t hold back my nausea. I ran to the bathroom and unloaded the contents of my stomach into the toilet.
