The entirety of Jade City came out for the royal wedding. The palace ballroom could not hold everyone and so they spilled out into the streets and sat upon rooftops all trying to get a glimpse of our union. Kendal attended with my mother and Adaline, but when I tried to meet her gaze she looked away in shame.
She knew. Of course she knew about the arrangement. I’m sure Dr. Elsie and Annabeth had briefed them all.
It was heartbreaking when I thought about it, so I just didn’t think about it. I said yes to becoming Drae’s wife, to becoming his queen, in front of the entire city. I drank wine and he drank mead. We ate chocolate cake that was the same recipe as our first date. We danced and rode around the city on horseback greeting the people. All the while, I stuffed the issues surrounding our little arrangement deep down inside of me. All of these smiling people would eventually die if Drae didn’t restore the magic by giving them an heir, so any needs or thoughts I held around that were just selfish.
After a full night of revelry, my new husband brought me back to our shared room. He’d had a room of the palace never before used completely redesigned for us. No more dark wallpaper and black carpet like his old chambers. This room was full of creams and gold and felt airy and bright.
A new beginning.
I walked nervously to our shared bed, suddenly scared of the pinch of pain Kendal told me would happen when I gave up my purity.
A little pain at first for pleasure down the road, she’d informed me.
I sat at the edge of the bed and stared at Drae. As much as I wanted to make love to him, I was also nervous. He was so much more experienced than I was. He seemed to pick up on my fears as he crossed the room to kneel before me. Grasping my butt, he scooched me closer to him so that he was tucked between my legs.
“You are in charge in the bedroom, okay?” he said, and my stomach dropped out. “We can move as slow or as fast as you want.”
I swallowed hard and nodded, feeling emboldened by him giving me the control. Leaning forward, I took his bottom lip into my mouth and sucked. The moan of pleasure that ripped from his throat caused me to grin. Reaching behind me, I pulled the string of the bow that held my corset together, and then shimmied out of my top half, freeing my breasts.
Drae dipped his head slowly and took my breast into his mouth, causing me to fall backwards with a moan. Heat built between us and I started to unbutton the side opening of my giant skirt. With tender hands, Drae helped undress me, pulling his own clothes off until he stood before me fully naked and fully… aroused.
I stared at his body as he lowered himself on top of me. “You’re in charge,” he whispered, peppering my neck with kisses. His wet tongue sent tendrils of pleasure through my body.
The heat started to pulse between my legs and I grasped one of his hands, placing it between my thighs. The second he touched me down there, rubbing small circles over my most sensitive spot, I gasped in shock. Waves of pleasure danced over me as I leaned forward and rested my lips on his shoulder, panting through the ecstasy.
He hovered over me, propped up with one arm, gazing down at me with a rakish grin. He liked my pleasure, and I wanted more.
Reaching down, I lined him up with my hips and then we came together. He slowly rocked forward and back and I hissed at the sharp stab of pain, causing him to freeze. “Are you okay?” He looked down at me with concern.
I nodded, leaning up to kiss him, and then he rocked some more. The pain was still there, but lessened with each thrust until there was just a deep throbbing which gave way to more pleasure.
Now I understood why my mother pressed upon Adaline and I to keep our purity until marriage. This was an incredibly intimate thing shared between two people. Something I couldn’t imagine doing down at the tavern for one night like some of the girls did.
He started to tremble on top of me, and then quickly pulled himself away from me, grabbing himself with his hand.
For a moment, I thought something went wrong—he’d left so abruptly—but then I realized this was the method he spoke of to make sure there was no pregnancy.
It was the most special moment of my life, giving myself fully to him, giving him something I’d saved for him alone. But my face fell when I realized that he would soon be sharing this moment with other women. That we would never have a child together.
He peered over and scanned my face, worry taking over his as he seemed to understand what I was thinking.
“It won’t be like that with them. I won’t kiss them, I’ll barely touch them, just enough contact to get the job done.”
A single tear slid down my cheek, running behind my neck and I realized that our marriage was doomed from the start. I’d never truly be okay with this arrangement. It would fester inside of me until I exploded. I learned in that moment that I was a horribly jealous woman who didn’t want to share one inch of my husband. Not even to save a kingdom.
But I said nothing, because I knew if I did he would back out of the arrangement, and Adaline and everyone I loved who carried dragon magic would die.
THE NEXT MORNING we made love two more times, staying in bed until midday. Finally, we bathed and got dressed to have lunch in the dining hall. Drae promised to take me on a two-day trip to Grim Hollow. I’d never seen the shipping port, which was famous for its wares from beyond the realm and was full of trader stalls and markets.
We were going to have lunch and plan out the trip, but when we stepped into the dining room, Cal and Falcon burst in through the other doors just as the horns of war blew from the city gates.
Without hesitation, Drae took off running toward where Cal and Falcon stood.
They murmured something to him and Drae looked at me. “Stay here, my love!” he shouted, and they all ran down the hall, presumably for the barn to ride to war.
Like Hades I’m waiting here! Just because I was his wife didn’t mean he could tell me what to do. I jogged after them, grateful I’d worn trousers and a small tunic today.
“The Nightfall queen has taken Middle Bridge. Our army is keeping her back, but barely,” Cal said as they ran.
I jogged up beside the three of them, passing Annabeth on the way, who flattened herself against the wall in fear as we passed.
“The king and I will fly to lend aid,” I said.
Drae stared at me and shook his head. “You must stay back and keep safe.”
I growled, an almost inhuman growl which caused all three men to glance over at me in shock. “I am still a member of the Royal Guard, sworn to protect you. I will fight and you will not tell me what to do.”
His eyes narrowed. Cal looked like he was hiding a grin.
“The queen has spoken,” Falcon said. “We could use her power, sir. Especially after losing Regina.”
Her name hung in the air like a tangible thing. Her loss was felt deeply in that moment. She would know what to do, she would call the shots. Drae hadn’t even replaced her yet. I believed a part of him didn’t want to accept she was really gone.
“A queen who fights in the Royal Army?” Drae said as we burst outside to the chaos of the entire Royal Guard suiting up for battle.
I nodded. “That’s right.”
He just sighed in resignation but said nothing. We stepped into the barn; the others stayed outside to give us privacy while we shifted. I no longer turned away from him, this time taking off my clothes before him while he watched me with yellow glowing eyes.
“Are you sure it’s okay that you use your magic to shift?” I asked him.
He inclined his head. “I’ll just attempt a partial shift of my wings. We could use two fliers.”
I pulled on my magic and then was thrust forward as the shift took over my body. I was on my hands and knees as I heard Drae grunting above me, bones snapping as he completed his own shift.
A growl of frustration ripped from Drae’s throat. I looked over at him in my dragon form now that my change was complete. He was shirtless, on his knees, half of a wing protruding from his back, black scales on his face and one hand turned to a claw.
My heart plummeted into my chest. ‘What’s wrong?’ I asked, using our mental link.
His chest heaved up as he stared at me with pure shock marring his beautiful features.
“I… I can’t shift.” His words slammed into me like arrows and I stumbled backwards until my tail hit the backside of the barn.
No. No… we weren’t ready for this. Not now, not while we were under attack.
He seemed shocked into silence, and so I channeled my inner Regina and took charge. I looked him right in the eyes. ‘Get dressed. Get my saddle, and ride on my back as a bowman.’
He stood there wide-eyed, as if hoping something might change. He’d waited too long to have an heir. His parents only had one child before his mother died in labor with their second.
We were out of time.
“My men will wonder why I don’t ride in my dragon form,” he said, shame marring his deep voice.
‘Tell them your wing is injured. Or better yet, tell them not to question their king. Let’s go!’ I urged him. Every second we stood here talking, the Nightfall queen got closer to taking our Middle Bridge territory.
He got moving then, changing his one hand and wing back to human and then throwing on clothes. Within moments, he had secured my saddle and sat on my back holding a bow. As I walked out to the rows and rows of men dressed for battle, my heart was with my husband, my king. The queen was retaliating for her son, and I wasn’t going to let anything happen to Drae in his weakened state.
If he died, if they all died, I would be the only one with dragon magic left… and that thought was too terrifying, so I pushed it aside.
The men looked confused for a moment at seeing Drae riding on my back, but he started to bark orders and they quickly fell into line.
“Meet us at Middle Bridge!” he yelled, and then I took flight.
He was heavy, so my initial liftoff was wobbly, but pretty quickly I was able to balance myself and control my wing speed in order to smooth out the ride.
I flew faster than I ever had before, the drums of war beating throughout the entire kingdom. Below us, warriors rode to Middle Bridge on horseback. I squinted to try and make out anything in the distance. On the horizon ahead I saw smoke wafting up from Middle Bridge.
‘They’re burning it!’ I shouted.
Middle Bridge was our only way through the Narrow Strait and into Thorngate, where we traded with the fae. A third of the food we consumed came from trade with Thorngate. This would devastate us. Anger swirled inside of me. Metal specks glinted in the sky and I knew it wasn’t birds.
‘Take down the human fliers,’ I told him.
‘On it,’ he replied and I drew closer, watching in awe as he expertly shot arrows while standing on my back. One by one, the flying humans dropped from the sky like stones, and I focused my sights on the bridge below. The fire was small, just at the beginning of the bridge, and our warriors were trying to put it out with buckets from the river. At the end of the bridge, the entrance to the Narrow Strait, was the queen of Nightfall. I’d never seen her in person, but I could not mistake the regal woman on horseback wearing a red leather battle suit and a tall golden crown. Her arms glinted with metal from the contraptions strapped there. Her face was pulled into a grimace.
‘Arwen, no! She’s too powerful,’ Drae said, but I was already flying at her. She was right there in front of me. One stream of fire and the world would be rid of her. She was weak, a simple human. If I didn’t take her out now, she’d keep coming for me and Drae and his future children.
“Arwen!” He slapped my shoulder as if trying to steer me another way.
I built the fire up inside of me, ready to blast her with it, when her head snapped up in my direction. I’d been wrong to mistake her for a weak human, but I realized that too late. In one swift move she leapt into a standing position on her horse’s back and raised her arms. One second she was pointing at me and the next a dozen metal bolts flew from the device on her forearm right for Drae and I like comets falling from the sky.
I prayed he was strapped in as I did a roll midair to avoid the metal projectiles.
‘Holy crap! Are you okay?’ I asked Drae as I straightened out.
‘I’m fine. Don’t get too close to her! That thing on her arm is shooting way farther and faster than I can with my bow.’
I nodded my dragon head, still shaken by the whole thing.
‘What do we do? They can’t take that bridge. We won’t survive the winter without the fae crops.’
The queen looked delighted at my retreat. She dismounted her horse and walked to the other side of the bridge that wasn’t yet burning. There was a glint of steel and a small flame flickered in her palm.
Stupid machine contraptions!
She was going to take the bridge.
‘Burn her forest!’ Drae bellowed. ‘If she wants to take our bridge, we take her land too.’
Yes!
It was brilliant.
Veering to the left, I flew outside the rocky cobblestone path of the neutral Narrow Strait and into Nightfall territory.
An arrow flew from the trees but I dodged it, and then swooped low into the thick forest. When I was a few feet from the tree line, I released all the magic I’d been holding in a blue stream of deadly fire.
I flew low, spreading the flames across the tops of as many trees as possible, not even stopping when I reached a wooden guard tower. The tower ignited, and a man screamed, jumping out of it and towards the ground.
“Retreat!” I heard the queen bellow. “Fetch water.”
I started to turn back towards the bridge as the Nightfall warriors scattered like ants. They abandoned the bridge and ran from the river to the now-burning forest. I stayed far from the queen’s range of shot, but close enough that I could see her face.
She looked livid, her mouth contorted in an evil grimace, and it brought me great joy. The bridge fire was dying down as our people splashed it with water. The wood was charred black in parts but it would hold.
For now.
The Royal Guard cheered as I flew over them, circling to make sure the queen didn’t try to come back and burn the bridge, or worse, enter our lands. But she was busy enough trying to contain her own fire, which had now spread to three times as many trees as I’d ignited. She’d have her hands full for weeks, maybe even months, if it spread to buildings.
I landed and let Drae talk with his men, checking on them and doing an inventory of injured warriors. After everything calmed down, he ordered them to keep a presence there and to start making plans for a bridge made of stone. Once we felt the situation was handled, he climbed back on my saddle and I flew us home.
As I landed on the ground of the palace, Dr. Elsie rushed forward and examined me for injuries. Drae dismounted, pulled off the saddle, and I shifted and changed into clothes.
“I’m fine. Check him,” I told her, spinning to find Drae staring at me with concern.
“I’m fine too,” he said.
I shook my head and widened my eyes. “Tell her.”
Dr. Elsie frowned. “Tell me what?” She had her healing wand ready.
He sighed as Dr. Elsie looked confusedly between the both of us. Stepping forward, I lowered my voice. “His magic is…”
I couldn’t speak it out loud; the thought terrified me.
“Dying. I can no longer even partial shift,” Drae finished, and Dr. Elsie’s face fell.
“Well, then you know what you must do. Tonight.” There was an urgency to her voice.
Drae nodded in understanding and then she left us.
It was like a knife to the chest, how quickly she determined that my husband needed to bed another woman.
She’d broken one of our rules without knowing it. A rule that was supposed to keep me sane throughout all of this. I didn’t want to know when.
Now I knew and I wouldn’t sleep. I’d chew off every fingernail. I’d pace holes into the carpet.
Tonight.
“I don’t want to.” His voice was low as his arms came around me, holding me while he breathed down my neck.
The side door opened and Adaline stepped out, completely unaware of what she was walking into, and upon seeing my beloved little sister I nodded. “You must.”
I wouldn’t let Adaline and everyone else die on account of my jealousy.
Spinning, I kept my emotions in check as I kissed his cheek. “I’m going to have dinner with my mother and sister tonight,” I informed him.
He went very still, watching me like an animal watches its prey, trying to see through the façade I was putting on. I wanted to sob, I wanted to slap him, I wanted to make love to him.
I did none of it.
“I love you,” I said, then stepped away from him and beckoned my sister.
My first duty as queen was to save my people. Only the people had no idea, and they never would.
I MOVED my food around my plate a lot at dinner but didn’t eat. Adaline didn’t seem to notice but my mother did. She frowned, looking at me as my heel bopped on the carpet nervously. We spoke of the weather, the fig trees, and every other boring thing, and after a while I bid them goodnight.
I paced the carpet of our luxurious bedroom and stared at our marital bed. Thinking of the way he bedded me last night made heat bloom between my legs, but thinking of him doing that to other women caused smoke to steam from my nostrils. I walked over to the bed, picked up a pillow, and threw it across the room in frustration. My mother had once told me it was hard to tell when a woman’s good fertile days were, so she advocated daily bedding for the couple trying to conceive. The thought of Drae doing this nightly made bile rise into my throat.
Why did I tell him it was okay? I suddenly regretted giving him permission to do such a thing. I wanted to run down the halls of the palace screaming his name and then attack whichever woman was under him right now. I wasn’t cut out for this, not now, not ever.
Grasping a porcelain teacup, I threw it against the wall with a scream. When it shattered, splashing hundreds of broken pieces across the sofa, I felt no better.
Desperation gripped me. Then the door blew open, slamming into the wall so hard that I jumped. A yelp of surprise ripped from my throat and I spun, my gaze raking over Drae’s shirtless form.
A single tear stained his cheek and he shook his head as he closed the door behind him. A tear, a head shake. What did it mean?
I was frozen in time, locked in my mind trying to analyze the situation. Was he mad? Did I do something wrong? Had the women rejected him?
When he reached me, he grasped my hips. “I can’t. I won’t.”
Four words. Four small words was all it took to deepen my love for him.
“I want a baby with you. I want to be the father of your child, and I want you to be a mother,” he said.
My lip quivered as tears rolled down my cheeks unencumbered. “But… if it’s deformed—”
“I don’t care. I will love whatever child we make together for however long we have with him.”
My heart nearly grew wings in that moment and I feared it would fly out of my chest. A king so consumed with bloodline didn’t care if he had a child with a defect? It was unheard of. The Nightfall queen once killed one of her sons for having a stutter.
“Him?” I quirked an eyebrow.
He grinned. “Or her.”
His hands moved from my waist to my stomach, and I thought about the gravity of the situation. Wasn’t having a child you knew would be born in discomfort wrong? “It’s not right to put a child through pain for our selfishness,” I said.
“One journal entry doesn’t mean every child between that couple was born with an ailment. These things happen. It could have been just the first baby but not the others. They could have had five more healthy children between them.” It was as if the dark cloud that had been following me around all day had parted in the sky.
He was right. My mother told me these things did happen. Cruel twists of fate with no cause. I wished this couple were still alive today to ask them.
A child having a condition didn’t make them any less, and I would love whatever little one we created. It would be half me and half Drae.
“If the child lives for only a moment, does it still strengthen your magic?” I asked.
He nodded. “The moment you get pregnant, my magic will strengthen a bit, then fully at the birth.”
I was suddenly overcome with adoration for this man. He chose me, he chose us, in all our imperfections, and that was pretty perfect to me.
NINE MOONS LATER.
“SHE’S IN PAIN. DO SOMETHING!” Drae barked to Dr. Elsie.
The dragon-elf healer rolled her eyes at the king. “She’s in labor! Pain is expected.”
My mother stood from my side and walked over to Drae, who was pacing the carpet. He stopped, looking down at her with frantic, wild eyes. He’d been to every one of Amelia’s labors, lost four children, and a wife last time—this was very traumatic for him. I told him he didn’t need to be here but he’d have none of it. He said he wouldn’t leave my side.
“I know you’re scared,” my mother said. “But I’ve seen many women through childbirth and they weren’t half as strong as my Arwen. She’s going to be fine.”
He all but fell into her arms for a hug and my throat tightened with emotion. Adaline and my mother had moved into the palace when I’d announced my pregnancy, and my mother and husband formed a special bond. She had a way of calming him; he respected her and valued her wisdom.
I grunted as another tightening took hold of my stomach. It had been a pretty easy pregnancy. No sickness like other women complain of; Drae fed me chocolate cake every night and whatever else I wanted, and gave me foot massages. But the labor was far from easy.
The elf king, Raife, had done us a kindness and engaged the queen in a small skirmish, and she’d lost interest in us… for now.
I screamed as pain took hold of my body, and both my mother and Drae rushed to my side, each one taking a hand. It felt like the area between my legs was on fire.
“It burns,” I grunted, trying to push hard like my mother taught me over the last few months of coaching sessions.
“I see the head!” my mother said, getting into position between my legs.
Dr. Elsie grasped a blanket and a basin of sterile water and rushed beside my mother. We agreed that my mother would tend to me, and Dr. Elsie, who had more experience, would tend to the child and its… complications. Whatever they might be.
Drae’s head leaned against my shoulder. He spoke barely above a whisper. “I’ve loved you more than anything in this world,” he breathed into my ear.
I realized then that he was preparing for me to die, and it shocked and saddened me.
“Tell me that again when I’m actually on my deathbed.”
Pressure built, and I growled as pain like I’d never felt before sliced between my legs, like a butcher knife cutting my most sensitive parts.
The pressure was so intense I almost passed out. Then there was relief.
“A girl!” my mother said with joy, and I looked down, shocked. I braced myself for deformities, organs outside the little one’s body, an unbreathing child, blue skin, but… she was perfect. A golden glow dropped from the ceiling then and covered the baby, causing the breath to catch in my throat.
Was that the magic? The dragon magic that fed to our people? The second it hit her skin, it was gone almost as if I’d imagined it.
I burst into tears, and realized that Drae’s head was still down. He couldn’t bring himself to look up. He was probably afraid of another stillborn. That’s when our daughter let loose with a big cry and Drae’s head snapped up.
I studied his face, wanting to commit this moment to memory forever—the moment he had a healthy child.
“Elsie, check her heart, her lungs, her…” A sob formed in his throat.
“She’s fine. I just scanned her.” Elsie held up her wand.
Drae sobbed, holding his hand over his mouth, no longer able to hold in the emotions. My mom stood and went to hand the baby to me, when the pressure built between my legs again. I grunted in pain, wild-eyed as I stared at my mom. “Something’s wrong,” I said, and Drae’s entire body went rigid.
My mom handed the baby to Drae and he took her, holding her as if she were a delicate egg. “What’s going on? Is she bleeding? That’s how it happens, the woman bleeds too much,” he said.
My mother shook her head. “It’s probably just the afterbirth—” Her breath caught in her throat as she looked between my legs.
“Push!” she shouted, and my abdomen went rock hard. I leaned forward, not really sure what was happening, and pushed.
Fire. Pressure. And then relief.
A second cry split through the room and Drae and I stared at each other with wide eyes.
“Twin girls,” my mom said with joyous laughter.
“Two?” Drae peered down at the daughter in his arms, and then the one in my mother’s. She leaned on the bed and handed the second child to me. She too was covered in that golden magic that lingered for only seconds before disappearing.
She was perfect. Soft skin, blue eyes, a button nose. Twins. It was so rare, and there was no way of knowing until you got in labor. I couldn’t help the laughter that bubbled out of me.
Two girls.
“Regina and Joslyn, that’s what I want to name them,” I said to Drae.
He nodded, and then sat on the edge of the bed and looked down at the tiny child in his arms. “Two princesses.”
I grinned. “You’ll be the last dragon king for a while.”
The smile grew wider on his lips. “I’m okay with that.”
He lay back, snuggling into me as we held our girls between us. Sometimes life was hard and horrible things happened, but we were proof that even the darkest times could be turned into a happily-ever-after.
My mother tended to me and cleaned the girls. Drae and I just lay there staring at them in wonder. Joslyn had fuzzy blond hair like me, but Regina’s hair was darker like her father’s.
“I can feel the magic coursing through me. It’s so strong,” Drae said.
With two heirs now, I hoped so. It was a great relief. Adaline and everyone else I cared about would be okay.
There was a knock at the door, and Drae called out for them to enter.
Cal walked in, took one look at the two girls and bowed his head, smiling. “Twins? Congratulations.”
“Thank you,” we said in unison.
The smile fell from his lips as he peered at the king. “My lord, there is an urgent matter to discuss.”
Drae frowned. Calston wouldn’t intrude moments after my giving birth if it truly were not urgent.
“You may discuss it freely before my wife and queen,” Drae said.
Cal cleared his throat. “King Raife Lightstone is in your study.”
Drae jerked into a sitting position, looking down at little Regina and then to me. If Raife was here, it meant he was here to make good on Drae’s promise. He was here to ask my husband to start a war.
“Go,” I told him, trying to keep the shakiness from my voice. Raife wouldn’t come all the way over here if it weren’t serious. I owed my life to that man, and even though war brought death and hardship, I was in agreement that the Nightfall queen had to be stopped.
My mother took baby Regina from Drae and he crossed the room, taking one last look at me and smiled.
I loved that smile. I loved that all he’d done since I’d met him was smile more and more each day. I liked to think it was because of me. No matter what this war brought, we had each other and our new little family of four.
