Callie’s giggle pulls me awake. I’m back in my bed, the blankets tucked tight beneath my chin and the soft breeze from the open window gliding over my face, bringing with it the fresh scent of the ocean. The birds call out their morning song, and the waves lap at the shore, creating a beautiful harmony. Gabriel’s booming laugh has me smiling. And Callie’s hysterical chortles have me beaming.
Now, that’s a soundtrack I love to wake up to.
I sit and roll my neck free of the cramps from sleeping in a twisted ball of limbs on the floor with my family. Gabriel must have put me back to bed not long ago, and judging by the smell wafting up the stairs, he was ushered to the kitchen for breakfast shortly after.
The girl loves to eat.
I swing my legs over the side of the bed and take a series of deep breaths.
In… out…in…out.
I tell myself where I am. I tell myself who I’m with.
I tell myself that I’m safe.
That everyone is safe.
Every morning I do this. Almost as if to ground myself in my reality.
My heavenly reality.
I get to my feet.
Our bedroom is a good size and wonderfully homely. The cottage reminds me of the pictures in the books I would read when studying history. This realm froze in the fifteen hundreds. The same day Rebecca Hooper performed the spell which created it. A mirror image of the human world but containing within it all the magic in the universe. It started moving again after I completed the final spell at the final Bloodstone, but otherwise, we live in a world lost centuries ago to humans.
This cottage was the same one I lived in with Amara when we were both over here, pregnant with our children.
I gave birth in this very bed.
It’s a Tudor home with high ceilings and wooden beams filled in with brick. Our roof is thatched, and every room has its own rustic fireplace and classic charm. The furniture is what I would call antique, but it’s all brand-new.
I feel like I live in the history books but in the most idyllic version possible.
We have magic, after all. And knowledge. And you better believe we have plumbing, clean water, and fully functioning irrigation systems.
The whole of the left side of the bedroom wall is fitted with shelves. Gabriel stacked them with countless books he found whilst I was “away”. The rest of the walls are filled with sketches of us all, drawn from his memories, to keep my presence in the house for him and Callie. I’m in every single one, side by side with them as she grows from baby to toddler to child.
I grab the shirt Gabriel wore yesterday evening and slide it on as I do every day.
His clothes. His scent. My drug.
He ensures I have one each and every morning to wear.
Even as I slide it on, I hear Hendrix.
“It ain’t normal. You’re always smelling that man and his clothes.”
“Because he smells of home,” I replied as we walked down the street towards the old Witch Museum in search of Rebecca Hooper’s wedding ring.
That never happened. Not after I threw us all back in time and changed our destiny.
But yet, we remember it all. We remember the pain and loss we all endured. The sheer terror as we were annihilated by Theo’s Hunters and the vigilantes.
And those memories of a life that never came into being refuse to leave us be.
We may not bear the scars on the outside. We sure as shit wear them on the inside.
I shake my head, ridding the words of the filthy vampire from my mind, and step out onto the landing.
Our home is nothing like we had in our old life. We have no electricity here, seeing as we have no need for it with magic and all it does is cause pollution and danger. We have no need to boast of wealth or standing. The Orchard was so grand and pristine. My Uncle’s home was so cluttered and loud.
Our home is ours. It’s perfect.
I pass through the landing, past Callie’s bedroom full of her toys, past the guest rooms, which are used more often than they’re not, and past the bathroom towards the stairs.
Below, there’s a small lobby with a door to the left which leads into our lounge, complete with sofas, more books, games and a pool table the boys no doubt spent far too long building.
Ahead is the kitchen. And that is where I hear them.
I linger in the doorway and watch with amusement as Gabriel and Callie look up at the ceiling, laughing like lunatics at the pancake currently stuck above their heads. The stove is splattered with pancake mix and the large table in the very middle of the room is filled with fresh fruit.
Gabriel puts down the pan and spatula and takes hold of Callie’s waist, lifting her high above his head.
‘Get it,’ he chuckles, reaching her higher. ‘Go on! It’s the best one we’ve made yet!’
She is laughing so hard her face is beet-red and she can hardly catch a breath, but she reaches up for it. Teasingly, he holds her just a little lower than she needs to be, making her giggle all the harder.
I can’t help but join in. My laugh has Gabriel’s eyes on me in an instant and they glisten with joy. Something as simple as a pancake stuck on the ceiling… it brings such happiness.
He lifts her higher and she grabs it. But it slips through her fingers and lands with a splat on Gabriel’s forehead.
The room falls silent before we all explode in hysterics.
I walk over and peel it off him before dropping it in the sink and picking out the odd bit of batter from his hair.
Callie is now snorting.
‘What are you doing to your poor daddy?’ I ask, taking her and sitting her on my hip. ‘And more importantly, what are you doing to my pancakes?’
She tries to explain how it got up there, but her laughs refuse to allow out a single word.
Gabriel leans over and we share a kiss.
‘Good morning, Beautiful.’
‘Good morning.’
‘Sit. Breakfast is almost ready.’ He gestures to the table, laid out for not just us to sit and eat but for others too.
And as if they were waiting to hear those words, the front door opens and in they come.
Same as every morning.
Collins holds open the door, letting his son, Finley, through first. As if there is any other choice. The kid’s a wrecking ball of energy and comes charging in. His face is so full of excitement as he plonks his backside down at the chair he has claimed his own. Right beside Callie’s. Each of them took their sweet time choosing which of the identical chairs they would claim as theirs forever and ever. They then proceeded to spend a day decorating them with paint and dried flowers before asking Gabriel to carve their names into the wood to really stake their claim.
Now Finley will forever have a place at our table, a fact he reminds us of daily. And one I will hold him to for the rest of my life.
Callie wriggles free of my arms and runs to sit beside him, keen to tell the story of the great pancake tragedy of this morning.
The next through the door is a rather tired-looking Amara, complete with six-month-old baby Lilah in her arms.
‘Morning, Honey,’ she beams, striding past Collins and handing him the baby. Her arms open wide and we hug.
The same as we do each and every morning when they come over for breakfast.
I think back to the time we sat talking about our future in the Arcane Realm. Amara said we would live next door to each other. That there would be a hole in the hedge between our gardens. But in reality, we never even put those hedges in.
We have a path lined with daffodils connecting our front door to theirs, and when that door opens each and every morning and she walks in with her family, I swear, the sun shines just that little bit brighter.
‘You look like you had as much sleep as I did,’ she yawns, stepping back to take a look at me. ‘Nightmares still determined to keep you up?’
‘No more so than your gorgeous little girl.’ As Collins passes, I take my chance and reach out to take her. ‘My turn for cuddles,’ I grin.
Lilah’s so small and obviously teething as she starts gnawing on my shoulder.
‘Watch that. She’ll soak through your shirt.’ Collins yawns with extreme exaggeration as he heads over to Gabriel at the stove.
The two share a hug. The half-brothers who had no idea they were related for five entire centuries. They stood side by side through thick and thin. Through every trial. Every battle. Every loss and defeat.
And now they stand side by side to make their wives and children their morning pancakes.
And soon, we’re all sat at the kitchen table together.
I hold Lilah as Amara and Collins eat and I watch as Callie, not so sneakily, drops some of her food on the floor for her kitten to enjoy. The children soon get bored, as children that age do when sat for too long, and they begin flicking blueberries at their dads to see who can hit them in the face first.
They both win with a bit of help from me as I use my Telekinesis to guide the projectile blueberries straight to both Gabriel’s and Collins’ foreheads.
‘That’s cheating,’ Gabriel reprimands, taking a blueberry and flicking it in my direction.
‘Natural advantage,’ I correct.
He and Collins stand and clear the plates.
‘Did you see him yesterday?’ I ask Amara quietly as the guys talk about a fence that needs sorting in the sheeps’ paddock at the far end of the field.
‘No,’ Amara replies, shaking her head apologetically. ‘I sent Collins out to his usual haunts last night, but nothing.’
‘I’m getting worried.’
‘You shouldn’t be worried. He does this a lot,’ Amara insists, reaching over and taking Lilah, nodding to my plate of untouched food. ‘Eat. Bias likes the quiet and sometimes he feels safer alone.’
‘He shouldn’t be on his own. What if he does something to himself?’ I take another glance at the others, making sure that they’re busy enough not to hear us. ‘We all remember everything. Even though it never got a chance to happen, it did happen. We all know that. Bias has to live with centuries of horror. I know he wanted to end everything after I forced him to fix his Break. What if-’
‘He needs time to deal with things his own way. He’s not ready to forgive himself yet. Not that he should,’ she adds with a mutter.
‘You don’t understand. Being Broken… you’re not responsible for what happens. It took going through it myself to really understand. Bias and Toby are not the same person. Hating him or blaming him would be like me blaming you for something Gabriel did.’
‘What did I do?’ Gabriel asks, picking a squashed blueberry from his hair and peering over at us.
‘Nothing,’ we both reply together.
He raises his brow, knowing damn well I’m talking about something he wouldn’t want me to be dwelling on.
And he waits, brow high and unyielding eyes boring into mine.
‘Bias,’ I concede.
‘What about him?’
‘Bias took off again,’ Collins tells him as he pours the juice. ‘I went to look for him last night, but he’s gone.’
Gabriel takes a slow inhale and lets it out heavily. ‘Did he leave a note?’
‘Yep. The same old. “Gone to clear my head. Be back soon”.’
‘Do we know how long he’s been gone this time?’
‘At least three days,’ I reply. ‘After he came over for dinner and stayed the other night, he rushed off early in the morning and no one has seen him since.’
‘He’ll turn up,’ Gabriel insists. ‘It’s what he does.’
‘I hate the idea of him hiding away, filled with self-hatred and fear,’ I reply, looking into nothing and recalling the fragile man I pulled out of Toby Smith in that cell. How he risked everything for me. Obeyed my dark requests even when it caused him to suffer. How he fought endlessly to keep me safe, to bring me back, to reunite me with the others. And how he suffered with the knowledge of what his dark side did when it was in control.
‘Bias has bad days. He just needs to work through it in his own way.’
‘Problem is, Gabriel, a bad day for people like us can be deadly,’ I remind him. ‘Once we suffer a Break, if we feel too much misery, we might lose everything.’
‘Correction. Bias has a Break. Yours never got to happen, remember? And neither did mine.’
‘We don’t know that for sure. The memories are still inside us all. I could just as easily Break as much as he could. Or you. I don’t want him on his own. I don’t want any of us to ever-’
Gabriel slams his hand down on the counter. We all fall silent as we watch his mouth form a straight line and the muscles in his neck bulge.
‘I’m done talking about this. Done!’ His eyes flash with anger as I sit stunned in silence at his fury. ‘I don’t want to hear another mention of Breaks or Toby Smith or any other fucking Kendryk man for as long as I fucking live. Got that?!’
I’ve not seen him angry since we reunited.
I admit, it frightens me a little. Evident by how I just blink at him and feel the colour drain from my face.
‘Gabriel…’ Amara hisses, looking just as stunned as I feel. She glances at the kids and then me before stopping to glare at him once more. ‘What on earth is wrong with you?! Don’t you dare speak to her that way.’
His features soften and remorse at his outburst washes over him. As he goes to speak, Callie beats him to it.
‘What’s a Break?’ she asks, looking up at us as she scratches behind Shadow’s ear.
No one answers her question. No one knows what to say at all.
Gabriel goes to walk toward me. To speak.
I stand.
‘Excuse me.’ I scoop Callie up in my arms. ‘The chickens need feeding.’
I leave the kitchen. Amara, Finley and Lilah follow. Amara glares at Gabriel and as he goes to say something, she waves her hand and sends several more blueberries at his face.
Collins snorts and hands him a towel.
‘You kinda deserved that one, mate.’
Together, we head towards the chicken coop. Callie and Finley run ahead, giggling and playing.
The grass is damp with mildew and the smell of the ocean fills my senses. Our cottage is at the top of a cliff, set back a fair distance but close enough so we can see the ocean from our kitchen window. I stop to look at where an evergreen tree grows. One decorated with silver stars and hand-carved decorations.
Our permanent Christmas tree, forever standing tall.
They all planted it shortly after arriving here without me, and they’ve tended to it every day for the long five years I was away.
Five years.
Five fucking years.
The heavy ache in my heart at those lost years drags at my soul, leaving a weakness in its place for the dark thoughts to sneak in.
My hands tremble as my mind flashes with a series of violent images.
So much blood. So much death and torture.
So many faces, all snarling and shouting and threatening.
My whole life… just cruelty. So much goddamn cruelty.
Is Gabriel snapping at me all it takes to feel this terrible?
‘You okay?’ Amara asks as we walk.
‘Fine.’
‘I think I got him in the eye with a blueberry if that makes you feel any better.’
‘A little,’ I smile. ‘It’s okay. Gabriel can be angry. I know I am. Angry. Scared. Paranoid.’ I look around us, at the world we now have as our own. ‘I’m scared it will all come tumbling down. Gabriel is too. I know he is. Every time Gabriel looks at Bias, he goes rigid. Like he’s getting ready to fight. I think that when Gabriel sees Bias, sometimes, he still sees Toby.’ I look at her as we walk. ‘I wonder if when he looks at me, if he sometimes sees her.’
‘Her as in-’
‘Her, with the white hair and lilac eyes. Blood on her skin and a soul as dark as death.’ I gesture to myself. ‘Her.’
‘No. Absolutely not. No way. He’s just the same as the rest of us. Scared to lose everything we’ve fought so hard for. He has a wife and daughter he adores, and he lost them both once before. Even the idea of losing you is too much to bear.’ She glances back and grins. ‘Case in point.’
I look over my shoulder and see Gabriel running after us.
‘I’ll sort the chickens. You sort your husband’s attitude.’ She gives my cheek a kiss and follows the kids as I wait for Gabriel.
‘You can’t yell at me like that,’ I snap as he approaches. ‘Not in front of Callie-’
He pulls me into his chest and seals his arms around me, burying my face into his shirt.
‘I’m sorry. I should never have snapped at you like that. It was my fault. Completely mine. It was nothing to do with you at all and I was an arsehole for reacting the way I did.’ His words spill out in quick succession before he leans down and kisses the top of my head. ‘I’m so fucking sorry. I am so, so sorry.’
His arms tighten and he slowly sways from side to side.
‘I just can’t even think about it, you know?’ he says quietly. ‘The thought of losing you. The thought of losing myself or Bias again. The mere idea of it… I can’t stand it. I can’t, Lilly. But I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. Not after everything you’ve been through. Please forgive me.’
I give a single nod. Of course, I forgive him.
I peer up at him. His dark hair hangs over his ocean blue eyes as he meets my gaze. God, I fucking love those eyes.
‘I’m sorry. I’m scared too. That’s why we must look out for each other. We need to stay together.’
He plants a lingering kiss on my forehead.
‘You’re not going anywhere,’ he says, as if reminding himself, me, and the universe, that he will not allow it. Not again. ‘Neither am I, and neither is Bias. Please, don’t talk about Breaks anymore. It’s too painful.’
We stand there for a moment, watching the forever Christmas tree gently sway in the distance.
I have no idea if the Break still exists within Gabriel and me. Technically, this body never Broke and neither did his. Technically, I never had a relationship with Toby. I never got pregnant with his child, and he never did what he did to me in that barn on the Miller’s farm. And the horrors that Gabriel faced when he became the Grey Cloak never come to pass either. Not for his body.
We all know it happened, though. We remember every bit of it.
But Bias, his Break did happen. It happened centuries ago. He feels it every day, scratching just beneath the surface. A constant promise that if it gets the chance, the monster of Toby Smith may one day return.
Bias fears his Break, just as much as I fear mine, and Gabriel fears his.
And that fear creates only more fear.
Bias is trying. I know that. The others know that too.
He dotes on Callie. He serves the community with all he has to offer.
But when he has a bad day, when it all gets too much, he goes. He disappears and hides away.
This is the third time he’s taken off without a word since I got here.
And I worry that one day, we will find his body. That he will decide that the threat of Toby’s return just isn’t worth it, and he will end it all.
When I look at Bias, I don’t see the man I once loved. I don’t see the monster that was Toby Smith.
I see the young man who risked everything to save Gabriel from Hunters all those centuries ago. I see the innocent boy who suffered unimaginable horror in the cells of the Witch hunters before he lost his battle to keep his soul and fell into the darkness, forced to live in the shadow of wickedness.
‘I’ll go looking for Bias later,’ Gabriel promises. ‘I’m sure he’s fine. Please, try not to worry. Okay?’
‘Okay.’
I gasp as Gabriel’s lips crash onto mine. His hands grip me tight as he pins me to him, his tongue caressing mine with ferocious passion as his heavy breaths mingle with mine.
I sink into him. His embrace. His passion. I feel his excitement starting to grow and press between my legs.
I grab at any part of him I can get to. His hair. His neck. His shoulders. His chest. I’m desperate to keep him as close to me as possible. To soak him up in all his glory.
‘EEEWWWWWW!’ Callie squeals from behind us. ‘Daddy, stop sucking on Mummy’s face!’
Gabriel clears his throat and steps aside, hiding his dirty smirk from her as she runs toward me.
Gabriel awkwardly readjusts himself out of her line of vision.
‘Amara and Collins are babysitting for a couple of hours tonight,’ he tells me in a seductive promise. ‘You and I are having some alone time.’
‘I’ll hold you to that,’ I whisper back.
Callie leaps into my arms.
‘Can I come with you to the village?’ Callie asks, full of excitement.
‘We’re not going to the village today, kiddo,’ Gabriel replies. ‘We’re fishing. Remember?’
Her brow knits together. ‘But Clara said I could come if I wanted.’ She points towards the chicken coop.
‘Clara?’ I ask. ‘Oh…’
Amara appears from around the hedges that section off that part of the garden, walking side by side with another.
Clara.
She’s a Telekinetic witch. Pretty strong, too. Considering she had no idea she was a witch when she first came here. She’s in her late forties and loves to wear the most flamboyant coloured dresses she can find. Her black hair is always in loose curls that reach her hips, and she has the warmest smile. She waves at us and Callie waves back.
But her eyes land on me, and I know something isn’t right.
‘Good morning,’ Clara greets happily. ‘I am so sorry to bother you this morning, but I was sent by the Council to ask you to attend a rather impromptu meeting today.’
‘Is everything okay?’ I ask.
‘I’m sure it will be,’ Clara says, glancing at Callie briefly, not wanting to say too much in front of her. ‘Are you able to come?’
‘Of course,’ I reply, looking at Gabriel. ‘We’ll come.’ I glance at Amara. ‘Will you watch Callie?’
‘Morning!’ calls Collins, with a mouth full of toast as he heads our way. He stops at Amara’s side. ‘Everything okay?’ he asks, seeing Clara here.
‘There’s a council meeting,’ Gabriel tells him.
Collins stills and looks uneasy at his words but says nothing more as the kids are here.
‘Can you watch Callie?’ I ask Amara again.
‘Well, if you don’t mind,’ Amara replies. ‘We’ll come to the village with you. We were planning on taking Finley to the school today so he can get a look at it before he starts next term. I can take Callie too? Let her have a look?’
I feel all their eyes on me.
‘I think that’s a great idea,’ Gabriel replies.
I frown as he smirks. He knows I’m not sold on the idea of sending her to school. Or anywhere if it means her being out of my sight for more than ten minutes. He shows me that half-smile of his.
‘An hour at the village, then we can come back and take her fishing as planned. What do you say?’ He waits for my answer.
All of them look beyond hopeful that I’ll concede.
‘Fine,’ I huff.
The lot of them visibly relax.
‘This doesn’t mean I’m saying yes to the whole school thing.’
‘She’s going to be an Arcane, Lilly,’ Gabriel says, reaching over and taking Callie from my arms. They both beam at each other. ‘She needs to be in school.’
‘I do, Mummy,’ Callie adds, nodding firmly. ‘I need to play with my friends all day.’
‘Yeah, yeah.’ I turn to Clara. ‘What time is the meeting?’
‘Whenever you’re ready. The Council are there already.’ She clears her throat and looks around, her face suddenly blushing. ‘Is erm… is Jensen here this morning?’
I spot Gabriel and Amara’s little smirks.
‘Not this morning, no. He didn’t stay over last night. Does the Council need him too?’ I ask, knowing full well that Dad has made it very clear that he wants nothing to do with politics, and he’s in retirement. Unless he’s needed, of course, then I’m sure he’d be first into battle.
But he’s had enough of all that and just wants to be a dad to me and a grandad to Callie.
Clara, however, is very keen on being something to him too.
And I know he feels the same. A couple of shy teenagers, I swear.
‘Can we whoosh?’ Callie asks.
I look at Gabriel, who nods.
‘Yes, baby,’ I laugh. ‘We can whoosh.’
We all gather outside. Gabriel holds Callie in his arms, a sight I will never get tired of, and in a flurry of wind, I summon my magic and send us all to the village.
As Callie says, we whoosh.
As soon as we arrive, we’re welcomed with excited gasps and enthusiastic greetings as those who live in the village rush towards us.
A couple of them shake Gabriel’s and Collins’ hands. Children rush to see Callie and Finley. And all of them offer me a bow and their thanks and gratitude.
Something I have asked them repeatedly not to do.
Amara and I are offered the food they have in their baskets or a sip of their lemonade or juice. We politely refuse, but I ensure I speak to each and every witch who chooses to speak to me.
Whilst I was away, Gabriel and the others built up several wonderful communities here. This village is the main one. There are also settlements by the coast. Some in the woodlands. And some witches choose to travel, exploring the country or the world.
As the witches arrived in the Arcane Realm, most of them flocked to England, keen to join together and start a new world as a united front. The Nomads were spread far and wide. The Traitors too. But with the knowledge of the truth behind both Grayson’s and Theo’s motives and how they happily murdered them all to serve their own selfish purposes, they soon aligned themselves with us.
With Gabriel.
He took charge and made this place a home for thousands upon thousands.
‘Gabriel!’ greets a familiar voice. A young man steps through the growing crowd and holds out his hand. Gabriel shakes it fondly. ‘Thank you so much for coming.’ He looks at me and gives a respectful bow. ‘Lilly. A real honour.’
‘Good morning, Ash. How are you?’
‘All the better for seeing you.’
Ash’s light brown hair is flecked with grey, odd as he’s only a few years older than me, and his eyes always feel familiar. Like I’ve seen them a hundred times before, but we only met six months ago when I first came here.
He puts on a large smile for Callie.
‘And hello to you too, young lady. My, my. Aren’t you getting big?! You must have doubled in size since I last saw you.’
‘You only saw me last week,’ she chuckles.
Ash turns to Clara.
‘Morning, Mum,’ he greets, leaning in and giving her a kiss on her cheek.
‘Good morning, darling,’ Clara replies.
‘Thank you for passing over our message.’ Ash turns to me expectantly. ‘Shall we?’
I let go of Callie, and Collins takes her hand.
I kiss her, as does Gabriel, and I watch Amara and Collins take her through the village.
With a slight nudge from Gabriel, I follow Ash down the cobbled streets, through the bustling markets and past the homes of the witches who now live here, filling up this once empty world.
I remember walking through here when only Amara, Rebecca and I lived in this place. I remember the deafening silence. The still summer day that repeated again and again.
Now there’s a wonderful breeze and the streets are full of life. Three children run past us, using their Telekinesis to play wooden sword fights with each other.
Two women stand at the door of a bakery, handing out freshly baked bread to all who ask for it.
No one here is hunted or persecuted. No one goes hungry or cold. No one is left to struggle alone.
Everyone chips in. Everyone is equal. Currency is not needed here. Everyone pitches in with the work, whether that’s growing food, making clothes, caring for the children, or educating them.
And that is thanks to Gabriel and the group of witches who stood at his side when they first arrived here.
Those who later became The Council.
It’s a group of twenty people from every background possible. Those born Nomads, Traitors and those who believed they were human and ended up here quite unexpectedly.
I wonder if perhaps that is what this is about.
Those who arrived in this realm without any knowledge of their heritage. Of the magic that lurked in their blood, lost to the sands of time.
Ash is upfront, storming ahead and too far away to ask without causing worry to the happy faces that surround us.
Many hold out their hands for me to shake. Many continue to offer a bow. Many give their friends a nudge, pointing me out.
So when we approach the town hall and step inside, I feel relieved to have fewer eyes on me.
That is until we walk into the council meeting room, where dozens of people suddenly stand and face me in silence.
‘Oh… this can’t be good,’ I grumble, looking up at Gabriel as he stands beside me.
Our hands grip each other a little tighter as the door closes behind us.
