How can he stand to look at her?
Mila Hart killed his dad, and he’s holding her hand at his funeral.
His father’s fucking funeral. With the girl who killed him!
The turnout is very small, and there is nothing but dry eyes. Damon Valentine wasn’t a good man. But the killer…at his funeral. If that isn’t a stab in the back—pun intended.
She stabbed him in the back. That’s what everyone is saying. I tried to ask Roman, and he refused to talk to me. Last week, I thought we were getting better. Closer. But now I see that all it takes to be his friend is to kill his father.
Though the guy was a grade-A asshole, he was Roman’s only living relative. That’s it. Roman lost everything because she, what? Forgot her phone.
Everything we’d built in the past four years has crumbled in weeks. This was our year for football and girls. Having fun and partying all year. Now, it has all been destroy by a petite blonde with a wicked tongue.
She uses that tongue to wreck her enemies and lure in her lovers.
Watching the three of them at school has been damn confusing. She kisses Hunter in the hallways; she sits with him at lunch and they’re a couple. But she holds Roman’s hand in the halls, even when she’s kissing Hunter.
Everyone has been talking about it. I know she said she wouldn’t choose between us. But this…it’s not what I had in mind.
Everyone starts to leave, and Mom pats my shoulder. She came for Roman. She said funerals are not always about the dead, but the living and showing you care for them. Mom always cared for Roman.
I stand where I am, watching as Mom gives Roman a hug. He accepts it and nods at whatever she’s saying to him. Probably telling him to come over for dinner, that she hasn’t seen him in a while.
We have a game tonight, and I can’t lose. This season has gone from decent to shit. The scouts aren’t gonna come to my games. And Grady…there have been rumors about the scholarships he’s been offered possibly being taken away. That’s total bullshit. But Mom and Dad have been talking about it when they thought I couldn’t hear.
I need the scholarship. I need to get out of this town and make something of myself. Going to the local college here isn’t an option. I want to leave the state. Start fresh. I want to go all the way. I want to be drafted into the NFL. I want it all. But I can’t have that here.
And without my friends…the ones who supported me through all these years? I can’t do it. Hunter, Roman, and I are a team. We work together, unlike other players on our team. Emerson tries, but it’s not his end goal to leave here playing football. He gives one-hundred percent, but I need more. Hunter and Roman gave everything; they knew, together, we could secure the dream for me, the college for Hunter, and we would have taken Roman with us. I wouldn’t have left him behind, even though he doesn’t want to go to college.
All three of us against the world.
Now, it’s all three of them against the world, and I’m left here drowning without even a life jacket.
I don’t confront Roman like I want to. I nod at him and he nods back at me before I turn and leave to get ready for tonight’s game.
Alone.
The game was a total disaster. Grady, the one guy everyone can depend on, our captain, lost it, and Coach took him out. After that, the rest of the team shattered, and the game turned into one big clusterfuck.
Seeing that Mila is still up, I knock on her door. Only her car is in the driveway, which surprises me. Where’s her dad? More importantly, where are Hunter and Roman?
It’s time to fix this shit between us all. I need the guys, but not for the team—fuck football. I need my friends back. I have nothing without them. My whole life, I’ve had amazing friends, and I didn’t realize how lucky I was until I lost it all.
When Mila answers the door, she’s wearing that little silk sleep set. The one she wore when she told us all we give her butterflies. I doubt I give her butterflies anymore.
Her eyes are rimmed with red. She’s been crying. It gets my back up—why is she crying? She didn’t lose her father. She took that life.
And I lose it. “Why did you kill him? He was all Roman had; you knew that. Even if he was a fucking asshole.”
She looks at me, the tears now rolling down her face, and I can’t stop myself.
“What do you have to say for yourself? I didn’t think you had it in you to stab someone in the back. But then, I guess, you’re more like your mother than I thought.”
She scoffs, then shakes her head. So much for the sassy girl I once knew. Can’t even talk to me.
“Well?” I prompt, yet again.
She crosses her arms over her chest. “I have nothing to say to you.”
Nothing? How can she have nothing to say to me? Fuck’s sake.
I wanted to Mila alone to ask her what really happened. Why she would do that. But as soon as I saw her, I unleashed all the anger I had—about the game, about us, about everything—onto her, and I can’t stop. It’s like the dam has broken, and everything is being released. I can’t stop it; the water is flowing too fast, and my mind screams with pain.
“Tell me,” I yell at her.
I thought things were broken before, but at least they were fixable. If I’m left on the outside, looking in, how can I fix anything? Especially when I don’t know what I need to fix. I’m sick of it.
“Fuck off, Jace. If you think you can walk over here and yell at me, like you know everything . . .” she screams. “You don’t know shit. You haven’t spoken to Roman or Hunter. So, why would I talk to you?”
“Roman won’t talk to me, but I deserve to know,” I scream back unsure of what I wanted to know. This isn’t what I had planned.
“Why do you deserve to know anything? You spout the same shit everyone else is at school. Isn’t that enough for you? Don’t you love gossip? Are you calling me a murderer behind my back as I pass you in the halls like so many others? You seem to know everything, so what are you asking me?”
Fuck. I spin on the spot and slam my fist into the wall. Fuck. What the hell really happened?
She stands there and glares at me. The Mila I used to know isn’t there anymore; she’s changed.
Everything.
“You ruined everything when you came back,” I yell. The words echo in my head.
“I’m sorry I kissed your brother, Jace. You were with Britney. We weren’t a couple; we were barely friends. You made that clear when you had her suck your dick for me to see. I understood loud and clear that you were angry. Everything else…it happened because of your actions. I didn’t ruin anything.”
Her voice breaks, and I want her to look at me. How can she say that it was all me? It started the day she came back.
Hunter wanted her, and now they’re this happy couple. Roman…I don’t even know where he fits in with them. But he’s touching her. He lets her touch him, and I have no idea how she even got him to do that.
I knew she would choose Hunter and Roman over me. Hell, if my brother wasn’t gay, she would have chosen him over me too. That’s why I invited Britney over and showed Mila I didn’t need her. I make my own choices.
I wasn’t going to be second best to my brother…again. I’m always one step behind. Grady 2.0, but the original is always better. Fuck, I bet she knew he was gay before me too.
Me and the boys had everything under control. We played amazing football. We hung out all the time. We went to parties. Played dumb drinking games and Xbox until we pass out. Life was perfect…before she came back.
“What do you want from me, Jace?” Her voice a broken whisper, and it has me stepping back.
I peer at my throbbing fist. This isn’t why I came here. Why do I get so angry.
“I want everything back to the way it was.”
She waits for a moment and looks at me before she answers. “Did you ever apologize to Grady?”
The fuck?
This isn’t just about Grady; it’s about Hunter and Roman. I don’t know how to stop whatever’s happening. I can’t get Hunter to talk to me unless it’s on the field. He refuses to look at me when we pass in the halls. Roman doesn’t even grunt at me anymore.
“Did you?”
What? Grady…what has this—Fuck it.
“I said I was sorry, and he just keeps ignoring me.” Like everyone in my life does; even my own parents aren’t speaking to me more than they need to. They’re angry at me for what went down, but I didn’t do anything wrong.
“You said you’re sorry and think that fixes everything?” She shakes her head at me like I’m the bad guy.
I know I’m not the bad guy. I didn’t out Grady to everyone; that was Britney. I didn’t kill someone; that was Mila.
“Britney took something very important from him—his identity. She had no right to do that, and you just let it happen. In front of everyone. Did you ever think to ask him why he didn’t tell you? Why his own brother found out the same way everyone else did?”
I don’t answer her. I didn’t let it happen—it happened all on its own. What was I supposed to do? If I’d known, then at least there was a chance I could have stopped her. I guess I was surprised and didn’t know what to say.
“Because he wasn’t ready.” She throws her hands up. “It was his choice. If he wanted to tell you. Or everyone. Or no one at all. That’s his choice. He makes it and only him.”
“I don’t know what to do,” I say, defeated. I came over here for answers.
Why did she kill Roman’s dad?
Why is Hunter kissing her against her locker, and why is Roman holding her hand like he can’t not be touching her?
Yet, all she wants to talk about is my brother.
Fuck that. I want to know what really happened.
“You need to fix what’s broken between you and your brother. Go to Grady and just listen to him. Even if he’s not ready to talk, sit beside him and show him you care. I know he’s hurting. He hates that there’s a rift between you, and I hate that for you too.”
Did she tell him that? Why does he talk to her and not me? I apologized, and I meant it. I’m sorry that it happened.
“If I do that, will you tell me why you killed Roman’s dad?”
Mila shakes her head at me and steps back into her house. “Talking and listening to your brother needs no reward, other than the reward of understanding and accepting him.”
“Fuck this.” I turn to leave. This didn’t help at all.
If anything, I’m more confused.
