When I notice the sunlight on my face in the early morning, my first reaction is panic. I shoot up in my bed, feeling Aiden stir beside me as I clamor for my cell phone on the bedside table.
Just after seven. Whew.
Sophie doesn’t normally crawl out of bed until eight thirty, at least. Especially on weekends. Still, I have labs today, and since Aiden’s and my late-night activities prevented me from remembering to set my alarm, I’m a good twenty minutes behind. I yawn as I replace my phone where I found it, rolling my shoulders and stretching as I try to wake myself up. I’d wager we only got four or five hours of sleep last night, and I have sore muscles I didn’t even know existed until today, but still. Seeing Aiden sprawled out in my bed, his hair falling into his eyes and his mouth parted softly in sleep—I’d say it’s worth it.
Last night had been one of immense surprise and relief; I had been so convinced that Aiden would ask me to leave that his understanding had knocked me on my ass. And what’s even more remarkable is his apparent happiness to know who I am, who we are. It’s like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, knowing that there are no more secrets between us. It feels now like maybe we can actually give this thing a real chance. If that’s what Aiden wants, that is. I’m well aware that in our frenzied arousal that followed his discovery last night, Aiden and I haven’t gotten a chance to talk. That is something I think we’ll need to do at some point. I’d feel a lot better hearing that I’m not the only one who is invested in this thing between us beyond just the physical aspect.
I know I’m still behind, and that I should be jumping in the shower, but I feel greedy with him next to me like he is. His body seems too big for my queen-sized mattress, one of his thick arms draped above his head and the other resting over his stomach above the sheets, which are tangled around his hips. There are things more easily noticed in the bright light of the morning that I haven’t been able to appreciate during our usual late encounters— things like the soft smattering of hair on his chest that is lighter than that on his head. I let my fingers brush through it carefully as he stirs, not enough to wake but enough to shift his body so the sheet slips further from his waist, leaving him mostly nude.
And I am definitely not complaining about that.
I check the time on my phone again, weighing my options before telling myself that dry shampoo is a thing for a reason. Sure, they probably didn’t invent it for the sole purpose of early-morning sexcapades with your long-lost camgirl knight in shining armor, but whatever. I’m careful as I scoot next to him, lightly tracing the bottom half of his scar, which spills out from under his draped arm. I lean in to press my lips there afterward, feeling his skin twitch under my mouth, but his soft snores don’t stop.
I smile as I press another kiss lower, right along the relaxed V near his hip, flicking my tongue there as Aiden makes some soft sound in his sleep.
His cock lies heavy against his thigh, and I steal a glance at his face as I run a finger down the length of him, feeling him jump slightly at my touch. His thighs are already parted, one of his knees angled out to one side, so it’s not that difficult to wedge myself between them, bringing me up close and personal with the most intimate part of him. He’s heavy in my hand when I slide my palm underneath, and even with this I can feel him twitch.
It makes me wonder how much I can get away with before he wakes up.
I’m careful with my tongue, running it along the entire length of him with a barely there touch, and under my other hand that is braced over the top of his thigh, I can feel him tense. I swirl my tongue around the head before I try to take more inside, and I can feel how he’s starting to get harder in my mouth. I close my eyes as I push deeper, not able to fit all of him but making up for the leftover inches with my fist as I grip the base.
I don’t notice he’s awake until I’m pulling back up, my eyes popping open when I feel the weight of his palm on the back of my head. Now, it’s hard to smile with a dick in your mouth, so I’m sure I look ridiculous, but I try to make up for it by bringing the flat of my tongue under the head to cover more of him.
“That’s—” His voice is gravelly with sleep, his eyes glazed and half-lidded as he watches me. “That’s some wake-up call.” He’s fully hard now, making it easy to kiss along his shaft as he groans low in his chest. “What time is it?”
“Early,” I tell him. “She’ll be asleep for a while.”
His lashes flutter when I slide my tongue back up his entire length. “Okay.”
“But I have labs today,” I tell him, pumping him lazily with my fist. “So I have to be quick.”
One side of his mouth tilts up. “If you keep touching me like that, I don’t think time is going to be an issue.”
I like the way he watches me when I take him inside my mouth, looking at me like I’m some sort of mythical creature he can’t believe he’s seeing. It’s enough to make any girl feel confident. I bob my head to take as much as I can, still using my fist to work what my mouth can’t reach.
He’s gentler this time—none of the frenzied roughness like the last time I had him in my mouth, but I’m enjoying this side of him just as much as that one. Idly I wonder if there are any sides of Aiden I won’t like. The pressure of his hand on my hair is slight, hardly even there, but that, too, is making me feel heady. I kind of like being the one in charge for once.
His head falls back against the pillow, his mouth parting as his breath comes more roughly to spur me on. I can feel every twitch against my tongue, every little press of his fingers against my hair—all of it only making me want to push him over the edge that much more. I can tell he wasn’t kidding when he said this wouldn’t take long; I’ve barely had him in my mouth for more than a minute or so, and his breathing has been reduced to a series of ragged pants, and his hips tilt up almost reflexively every time I take him as deep as I can manage.
“Cassie,” he rasps. “You should—I’m gonna—”
I know exactly what he’s saying, and maybe it’s hubris on my part, but I like this. I like it because it feels like he can’t help it. I like it because he likes it. I could do this as many times as it takes to blow his fucking mind so that he won’t even be able to look at his cock without imagining my mouth on him.
Although with the way he’s panting, I don’t think it will take all that much.
His body is impossibly tense now, and his fingers have actually tangled a bit in my hair, but I’m so concerned with the way he swells against my tongue that I barely feel any of it. I work my fist in tandem with my mouth, hearing his stuttered groan before I feel the warm splash against the back of my throat. I try to focus on the sounds he’s making, the way his body shakes beneath me, closing my eyes as I swallow everything he gives me. The way he goes boneless afterward is intensely satisfying, and it makes my watery eyes and my lack of breath when I pull away from him all worth it. He looks dazed as he stares up at the ceiling, hardly even moving when I crawl up his body to drape myself across his chest.
“Good morning,” I tease.
Aiden blows out a breath. “Alarm clocks are going to seem incredibly lackluster now.”
“Job security,” I laugh, enjoying my little running joke. I lean in to kiss him, and Aiden doesn’t seem put out at all that I just had him in my mouth, pulling me in to deepen the kiss. I give him a softer peck after. “I do have to get out of here though. You cost me my shower.”
“I’d like to say that I feel bad, but . . .”
I grin. “Yeah, I’d hate to make a liar out of you.”
“I’ll return the favor later.”
“Oh, absolutely. I have a mental orgasm tally. Don’t worry.”
“Wow, no pressure or anything.”
My smile hitches up another notch, and I give him one last kiss. “I’m supposed to get my car from the shop after class, so I’ll pick Sophie up from the restaurant later, okay?”
“They fixed it?”
“Apparently the check engine light is not something you just ignore and hope it goes away.”
“I really could take you to class, you know,” he insists.
It’s a conversation we’ve had a few times since my old clunker gave out on me, and I roll my eyes now just like I have every other time.
“I might be the only person in this house that doesn’t hold a grudge against public transportation.”
He pinches my ass, and I yelp. “I’m glad it’s fixed, at least.”
“My slightly less-broken hunk of junk and I will be perfectly fine to come get Sophie after class.”
“She’ll be anxiously waiting for you to save her, I’m sure,” he snorts.
I roll away from him, feeling his eyes on me but not hating the attention, and I cast another look back at him before I head into the bathroom to do a rush job of getting ready. “Maybe today she’ll give your pancakes another chance?”
I laugh as I close the bathroom door behind me, hearing him grumbling the whole way.
The rest of my day doesn’t go as well as my morning.
The wake-up call I’d given Aiden hadn’t officially made me late leaving the house, but since I left later than usual, the traffic jam my bus got stuck in following an accident definitely made me late. Between the missed assignment this week and being almost thirty minutes late to my first lab, my instructor had a few choice words to say about getting my head in the game. It colored my entire day, throwing me off in a way that had me dropping things I shouldn’t and charting things incorrectly—making all sorts of errors I wouldn’t normally make had I not been so rattled.
I’m exhausted by the time I leave campus, my ride back to San Diego seeming much longer than usual. Picking up the car helps— but the hefty bill certainly doesn’t. Hell, before becoming Sophie’s nanny, this same bill would have meant eating microwave ramen for a week or two.
I’m trying to pull myself out of my gloomy mood by blasting Taylor Swift’s entire discography on the drive to the restaurant, but even my Spotify seems to be against me today, playing entirely too much evermore and not nearly enough Red. It’s like the universe wants me to cry today.
Fickle bitch, I’m telling you.
I’ve been to Aiden’s restaurant to pick up Sophie a few times now since our first interview, and while the hostess doesn’t side-eye me as much about my body spray anymore, she seems to have an opinion on my shoes, if the way she looks at my worn Chucks every single time I step through the doors is any indication. I don’t even acknowledge her tonight, giving her a dismissive wave as I head straight for the kitchen. I have to pass through the bar area to get there, but I’ve developed a good routine of moving around the bartenders while staying out of their way as I push through the double doors that lead into the kitchen area.
Now, I’m fully aware that I’m not in the best of moods right now, but I can’t pretend that seeing Aiden in full executive chef mode—barking orders to the other chefs and peeking over their shoulders with a discerning look all while wearing that jacket that I shouldn’t probably be so attracted to—helps a little. He doesn’t notice me at first, too busy criticizing the braising of some meat sitting in a pan that’s out of my view.
Sophie is perched on her usual stool in a safe corner near the sinks, waving when she catches sight of me and setting her Switch on the counter before hopping down from her seat. “Can we go home?” She casts a wary glance toward her dad. “Dad is in a bad mood.”
It’s like we’re linked or something.
“What happened?”
Sophie shrugs. “I don’t know. Some customer was mad about something.”
“Yikes.”
I peek back at Aiden, still chiding who I assume is one of his sous-chefs, wondering if it might be better to sneak out and send him a text. I’d hate to make his night any worse. Before I can land on a decision, Aiden finally notices me standing on the other side of the kitchen, and his expression immediately changes as he offers one last word to his sous-chef before coming over.
“Hey,” he says, smiling with tired eyes. “How was your day?”
I roll my eyes. “About as good as yours, it sounds like. What happened?”
“Bullshit,” Aiden grumbles. “I didn’t catch a steak going out overcooked, and it got sent back with a nice note about whether or not we deserve our stars.”
“Ouch.” I make a face. “They sound like they’re a lot of fun at parties.”
“What happened with your day?”
I know if I tell him I was late today he’ll blame himself, and since it was entirely my choice to hang back and enjoy him this morning, I don’t want to make his night any worse with needless bitching.
I shrug noncommittally. “Just a lame day. Nothing in particular.”
“I’m sorry,” he offers.
I wave him off. “Eh. It’s fine.”
“Sophie,” Aiden addresses his daughter. “Why don’t you go get your stuff from the office?”
“Okay!”
When we’re alone, Aiden peers at me from the side. “I really want to kiss you right now.”
“How gossipy are your chefs?”
“Oh, the entire world would know before you got to your car.”
This makes me laugh. “You’d better not risk it then.”
Aiden nods like he agrees, but there’s a set to his mouth that says differently. His jaw clenches as he hesitates to continue, looking like he’s wrestling with something.
“You know,” he starts. “My boss is throwing a party next weekend.”
I perk up. “A party?”
“For his birthday. He does it every year.”
I guess he’s telling me that me and Sophie will have a night alone soon.
“Oh.” I bob my head aimlessly. “Sounds fun.”
“I thought maybe we could go together.”
This catches me off guard. “What?”
Shy is a strange look for such a large man but not an unappealing one. “Like a date?”
My mouth parts in surprise. “But . . . what would we tell Sophie?”
“Well.” Aiden’s hand reaches just enough so that his pinkie brushes against mine, and it can hardly even be called a touch, but it makes me shiver all the same. “I guess we would tell her the truth.”
I can feel my heart start to beat faster, a heavy fluttering sensation setting off in my belly at the seriousness of Aiden’s expression. “And you’re . . . okay with that?”
“She’s going to find out eventually,” he tells me. “It’s not like you’re going anywhere anytime soon.” There’s a flash of uncertainty in his features then, like he’s not entirely sure himself but looking for some comfort in this regard. “Right?”
My mouth opens and closes like I’m doing a goldfish impression; I thought that we’d have to talk soon about what we are and where we saw ourselves going, but I never expected Aiden to dive into it headfirst without any hesitation. I’ve barely had time to wrap my head around the idea, and Aiden is ready to lay all his cards out on the table. It feels a little reckless, and a lot endearing, but ultimately, it’s an easy answer.
“No,” I tell him. “I’m not.”
His smile is brilliant, so much so that it nearly takes my breath away, and I’m experiencing an intense need to kiss him now. “So? Do you want to go?”
“Is it fancy? I doubt I have a dress that works.”
“Let me worry about that,” he urges. “Say you’ll come.”
I bite my lip as I consider, still concerned about how Sophie will take this news but too elated by the idea of Aiden wanting to tell her to even entertain the idea of saying no. Because who am I kidding? There’s no way I’m going to do that. Reckless or not, I know that I’m as ready to dive in headfirst as he is. How could I not be?
“Yeah,” I tell him. “I want to go.”
Another distracting smile for my trouble. “It’s a date then.”
It’s a date.
I’ve had plenty of first dates before, but I don’t think I’ve ever been on one with a guy I’m already sleeping with. And still I feel a thousand times more excited for this one than any other I’ve been on. I practically feel like I just got asked to prom.
Sophie comes back before I have time to say anything else, but I think the goofy grin on my face I can’t seem to wipe away probably says more than enough. At least Aiden’s looks mildly similar, so I don’t feel completely ridiculous.
“Can we watch Encanto after dinner?”
Normally I might groan—it’s a good movie, but we’ve seen it a dozen times now—but strangely I don’t even feel put out. I pat her head with that same smile plastered on my face. “Sure. We can watch it.”
“Yes!” She turns to wrap her arms around Aiden. “Bye, Dad. Love you.”
“Bye,” he answers back, squeezing her into a hug. “Love you too.”
Sophie flounces past me, and I give Aiden one last look before following her. “See you later?”
“Yeah.” The look he gives me is heavy, the green and brown of his eyes seeming warmer than usual. “You will.”
It takes me at least an hour to stop smiling.
—◊—
My heart is beating so fast. This could be a terrible mistake. He could be someone entirely different than he seems to be.
But that doesn’t seem to be deterring me in the slightest.
And he’s still waiting on my answer.
“I want to see you too,” I breathe. “Really see you.”
I can hear his exhale, rushed, like he’d been holding his breath.
I reach for the mask, but he stops me, making a sound of protest.
“But you said—”
“I want to be able to touch you, when I first see you,” he says. Heat pools in my belly. “Because when I see you . . . I have a feeling I won’t be able to stop.”
—◊—
