Okay, don’t panic, Lucy. Don’t panic.
DING DONG.
I’m panicking! I’m panicking so hard. Red-flashing-lights, alarms-sounding, someone-give-this-woman-a-sedative panicking!
Cooper is here to take Levi and me to the park, and not only do I suddenly not know how to walk normally anymore, but my mouth is all dried up and devoid of the moisture necessary to speak. I’ve never introduced my son to a boyfriend before—not that Cooper is a boyfriend, or anything even resembling one. But I think we can comfortably state that he’s a crush…a crush like I haven’t had since high school when I cut out too many pictures of Orlando Bloom and pasted them to my wall. Yeah, that’s right, glued—not taped. I was serious.
I haven’t resorted to that level of crushing with Cooper yet, but mostly because he doesn’t have a social media account, so there’s nowhere to download and print photos of his gorgeous face. Ha ha, kidding. I’d never do that.
Never…
“He’s here!” Levi shouts, acting as an unnecessary second doorbell.
“Oh, great!” Does my voice sound high-pitched to you? “Go get your shoes on, and I’ll answer the door.”
“K!” Levi runs off, a blur of blond hair as he dashes to the mudroom for his shoes.
I take that opportunity to full-on madwoman-sprint to the door and fling it open. I spring out at Cooper like a crazy jack-in-the-box, and he responds appropriately. His shoulders jump, and he takes a quick step back before realizing I’m not a psycho murderer and relaxing his shoulders.
I shut the door behind me and lean back against it with my hands on the doorknob. Cooper takes one deep breath and shakes his head, smiling. “Geez, woman. I thought I was about to have a heart attack at thirty-two.”
My brows pull together. “Have you had your blood pressure checked lately?”
He’s wearing a baseball hat, but since I’m so short, I can still see his eyes—his confused eyes. “Huh?”
“Just saying…it’s not uncommon for men to have heart attacks at thirty. You should have your—” And then I realize I’m being a weirdo again and give myself a mental slap. “Never mind. I just wanted to get to you before Levi so you can know a few things.”
He crosses his toned arms and assumes a serious expression. “Okay, shoot.”
“He’s never been introduced to any of my male friends before, so be prepared for any uncomfortable question under the sun, and just know that I have zero control over what comes out of his mouth.”
“Like, what are we talking? Is Santa Claus real, or where do babies come from?”
“Probably some combination of both. Defer to me on both accounts.”
“Got it. Go on.”
I grip the handle harder, using it as an anchor so I don’t go wrapping my arms around his tempting shoulders. This casual cotton tee is really working for him. Let’s be real, though—everything works for him. “He’s a four-year-old. He’s going to get super upset with the kite sometimes, and he might throw a tantrum when it’s time to leave. When we’re in the car, he likes to listen to ‘Wheels on the Bus’ on repeat. And he almost always—”
“Lucy…” Cooper says, cutting me off with a heart-melting smile. He steps forward, and I watch his hands rise up to rest on my hips. I’m a human circuit board now. Electrical currents zing through me, and I’m pretty sure if his index finger touched the tip of my nose, my entire body would light up like a rainbow strobe light.
Cooper’s hands squeeze my hips as he pries me away from the door to inch up closer to him. I’m silent because obviously I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT’S HAPPENING. Are we at this level of touching now? Can I get in on this action too?
He pulls me up close to him, and it takes me an embarrassing amount of time to realize he’s hugging me. His arms are wrapped around my shoulders and flexing as he presses me up firmly against him. I tentatively raise my arms and settle them properly on his back—light as a feather, afraid that if I give those hands too much power, they’ll take over and suddenly be under his shirt, squeezing every ridge I find. And there are many, people.
Because my face is pressed against his pectoral muscles, I more so feel his words than hear them. “Stop freaking out. I’ve met children before, and I liked almost half of them.” I feel empowered by his joke and pinch his side. He jolts a little and chuckles. “Seriously. It’s going to be a fun day, so stop worrying.”
“I can’t help but worry. I’m a mom—it’s what we do.”
“You don’t have to, though.”
Wait, did he just…? Yeah. Cooper just kissed the top of my head. It was so soft it was almost undetectable. Like he didn’t mean to but couldn’t help himself at the same time. Suddenly, the bro-code theory holds a little more weight. I want to come right out and ask Cooper, but I’m not quite ready yet. I need to gather more supporting evidence, and when I’m 75% sure, I’ll ask him.
“So…I’m your only man-friend to ever meet Levi? Is there a reason for that?” I can hear the smug amusement in his voice.
“Yeah, but don’t go getting a big head,” I say, realizing we’re still hugging in a very unfriendly sort of way. “You’re also my only man-friend.”
In the next moment, the front door flies open. Cooper not only releases me in record time, but he also manages to somehow roll me away from him like I’m a leper in Bible times. I stare at him with wide eyes and laughter building in my throat. Cooper’s embarrassed smile is probably the sexiest thing I’ve seen.
He looks at me and stage-whispers, “You got in my head.”
“Can we go now, Mom?” Levi asks, blue sneakers Velcroed on, tall Buzz Lightyear sock game on point, and completely unfazed by the giant man who was just snuggling his mama.
“Yeah, babe, we can.” I hold my hand out and wiggle my fingers for Levi to step out and take. “I want you to meet Mr. Cooper. He’s…one of Uncle Drew’s friends.”
Levi takes my hand and squints up at Cooper. “Hi,” he says with a little wave.
I don’t know what I was expecting Cooper to do with Levi. Actually, yes, I do. I thought he would be kind, but probably try to shake his hand and say something either a little too old for Levi like How’s algebra going this year? or swing too far the other way and talk to him in a baby voice.
I didn’t expect him to squat down on Levi’s level and hold out his fist. “What’s up, buddy? You can just call me Cooper—or Coop, like your uncle does. Cool if I come fly a kite with you today?”
Levi’s face lights up as he pounds his fist into Cooper’s, looking so proud of himself for already knowing what to do because this is what he always does with Uncle Drew.
“Yeah! You can come! Do you like my socks?” Levi sticks a leg out.
Cooper makes a big show of studying the sock. “Dude, I am so jealous of these socks. I don’t care what anyone says—Buzz Lightyear is cooler than Woody.”
And just like that, Levi lets Cooper into his supersecret, favorite-people-in-the-world-only club. It’s very elite and prestigious, and I don’t mean to brag, but I’m definitely in it. I think it’s time we make t-shirts.
Cooper stands back up with a soft smile aimed down at me. I think he knows he’s in Levi’s club now, and I think he likes it. “Ready to go have some fun?” he asks, glittering aqua eyes showing off almost a little too much.
Allow me to tell you the story of how one morning park adventure turned into an entire day of hang time with Cooper James.
Once upon a time, the three of us went to the park. We all packed into my tiny old Honda Civic, Cooper having stolen the keys out of my hand before I had a chance to debate with him over who would drive. Somehow, the sight of his hands on my steering wheel and deliciously long legs barely fitting in the car was the most sensual sight in the world. Why? I have no idea, but I had visions of him driving this car with no shirt on and the back seat loaded down with groceries, and I was getting so hot and bothered I had to roll down the window. Do I need better fantasies?
Things only got worse from there. If my ovaries acted out at the sight of Cooper on the boat, they were unruly hellions watching the man race across the open field with Levi and his kite. He was laughing, and high-fiving, and lifting Levi onto his shoulders so they could work together to retrieve the kite when it got stuck in a tree. And I know it wasn’t fake, because you know that feeling when you’re bursting with happiness and your actions all become overly dramatic and reckless and you might lie in bed later that night wondering if you looked like too much of a doofus? That was Cooper all day.
At one point, when Levi finally got the kite up in the air by himself after several failed attempts, Cooper cheered like an obnoxious dad in the stands of a soccer game, raced over to me, wrapped his arms around my waist to pick me up, and spun me around while yelling, “YEAHHHHHHH!” My ovaries were so excited at that I think I somehow managed to get pregnant again just from that magic twirl.
After that, Levi invited Cooper back to the house for PB&J sandwiches. I told him Cooper was probably way too busy, giving Cooper more than enough chances to politely excuse himself, but he just gave me a dramatic pshhhh and said he never turns down a good PB&J.
On the way home, Cooper noticed my check oil light was on and asked how long it had been since I changed it. I replied with, “What’s an oil change?” so he stopped in at the auto supply shop and bought me a few bottles of oil.
At home, I made sandwiches while the men got to work on the car, and when I walked outside with a tray of lunch, I nearly passed out. In another life, I dropped the tray, and it clanged dramatically on the ground. Because when Cooper slid out from under my vehicle, his shirt was off, and I couldn’t keep my eyes from sliding down every single one of his tanned, cut muscles. Cooper’s body is all large shoulders and defined pecs, tapering down to a six-pack and rippling obliques, with just the tiniest sprinkle of hair in the center of his chest. Somehow, seeing him standing there in jeans, no shirt, and a backwards baseball cap, it felt downright dirty. I almost suggested he donate his body to science, because when they finally get the cloning thing figured out, he needs to be the one they replicate.
As if that wasn’t enough of a sight to behold, he helped Levi out from under the car, and HE TOO had his shirt off. The two of them stood there, hands on their hips, a lovely example of opposites. One was all hard body and sun-kissed skin, the other the little dough boy with an adorable round stomach pooching out over his Spiderman underwear waistband. It was too much. And honestly, my heart ached at the sight of it. Partly because Levi looked so proud and happy, but also because there’s a very real chance that all of this wonderfulness will go poof and disappear as quickly as it arrived.
Cooper and I are not a couple, and he’s the most desirable, sought-after bachelor in town (I’m assuming, because…look at him). It might be fun for him to play house with me today, but the day in and day out of being a parent is not all kicks and giggles like this. I just can’t picture a man like him, one who has everything to offer, choosing to settle down and jump right into a family man role.
Once again, I aimed too high.
Which is why now, as I’m standing in the kitchen, rinsing the plates, I try to avoid replaying any memories of this day. And I certainly try to ignore Cooper when he walks in (still shirtless) and leans back against the counter directly beside me. I wish I found his confidence repellant. I wish the cocky grin he flashes me because he knows he looks good in this pose, with his arms crossed and biceps bulging, didn’t make my stomach twist into a salty little pretzel.
“You’re busy in here,” he says, and I only allow myself one tiny glance at him before focusing my attention back on the dishes.
“Yep. Busy, busy. Lots of work for us moms.”
He reaches over and cuts the water off, gaze burning into my face. He doesn’t say anything, just stares, waiting for me to make eye contact with him.
I finally do with a dramatic what-do-you-want-now face, and he grins. “You can see your reflection in that plate you’ve been polishing for the last ten minutes. Why don’t you put it down and come build Legos with us?”
Because I don’t want to. I can’t. It’s too domestic, and I’m starting to see that inviting Cooper into our life like this was a VERY bad idea. He fits too well but won’t want to stay, and now I will judge every other man against this perfect specimen, and it’s just not fair.
Thankfully, I don’t have to tell him anything because I’m saved by my phone buzzing on the counter. Cooper looks over his shoulder and picks it up, unashamedly reading the caller ID before handing it to me. “Unknown number. Probably just a telemarketer.”
Probably, but I will buy fifty of whatever they are selling just to be able to avoid this conversation with Cooper, so I answer with an exuberant “Hello!”
“Hey, is this Lucy?” a man asks.
“Yep, it’s me.”
He gives a slightly nervous-sounding chuckle before saying, “Hey. My name is Ethan Townsing, and I’m friends with your brother. I’m a PA, and I work at the same hospital where Drew delivers.”
“Oh. Hi,” I say, slightly at a loss, because this conversation feels odd. Cooper sees my speculative frown, and his brows pinch together as he shrugs his shoulders and mouths, “Who is it?”
I wave him off and keep listening. “I hope this is okay, but he gave me your number and said you might be up for going out sometime. I realize this is super weird because we’ve never met, but I’m hoping you trust your brother to play matchmaker as much as I do…” I’m slightly distracted at this point because Cooper has moved to press himself up beside me and lean his ear in toward the phone. He smells so freaking good. Like his body wash, man musk, and motor oil. FOCUS, LUCY. “…anyway, I know this is last minute, but I was wondering if you’d like to go to dinner tonight?”
Cooper pulls a disgusted face mixed with a who-does-this-guy-think-he-is headshake.
“Oh…well…”
“Before you say no, I’m texting you a picture of myself right now so you can see I’m a normal-looking guy and not covered in warts or anything else that would be considered gross. I’m a PA in the pediatrics wing, and I have a seven-year-old daughter.”
My phone pings with a text, and sure enough, he is pretty normal looking. He’s wearing a button-down shirt, mid-thirties maybe, nice brown hair, and glasses.
“Got it, and your word holds up—you’re very normal looking.” Oops. Did that sound rude? Cooper stifles a laugh, so I think it did. “Oh, shoot. What I meant was—”
He laughs. “Don’t worry about it. I know what you meant, and I’m the one who said normal first, so I have no reason to be offended, remember? Also, I realize this is awkward, and you probably feel a little blindsided, so feel free to hang up and think it over before giving me your answer.”
But the whole time he’s talking, I’m staring at Cooper. Perfect, swoony, funny, hot, Cooper. And I realize I have to say yes to this guy. Cooper is out of my league. He knows it. I know it. Levi probably even knows it. And Drew DEFINITELY knows it, otherwise he wouldn’t have warned me to stay away from him. More than that, Ethan is actually asking me out, whereas, so far, Cooper ghosted me until I was the one to start things up.
Ethan is exactly the reality check I need.
Cooper is watching me closely as I respond. “Actually, I don’t need time to think it over. If Drew trusts you, I do too. Let’s go out tonight!”
Cooper’s smile drops into a full grimace that makes my heart tremor with hope. Hope that he’s jealous? Ridiculous, Lucy.
“Great. I’ll see what reservations I can get on such short notice, and then I’ll text you an address and time. Want to meet at the restaurant, or should I pick you up?”
“Let’s meet.”
“Sounds good. Looking forward to it, Lucy.”
“Me too,” I say, trying to force some joy into my tone.
I hang up, and Cooper sinks back against the counter again, looking less confident and more thunderous now as he crosses his arms and studies me. “Tonight, huh? Didn’t want to play it cool and tell him you were busy tonight?”
I mimic his pose, leaning against the adjacent counter. “Nope. I’ve never been cool before—why pretend I am now? Do you have a problem with me going out with him tonight?” Oh, I really wish I’d left off that last part. I might as well have laid my feelings out on a silver platter in front of him and said DIG IN!
His eyes narrow slightly, and because he is shirtless, I can see his big chest fill up with air and hold it for three beats before letting it out in a rush. “No. You deserve to go out and have fun.”
I resist the urge to melt into a depressed puddle on the floor.
A second later, my phone pings with a text from Ethan, giving me the name of the restaurant and saying our reservation is for 7:00. My first thought is that, on a normal night, I would have already eaten a full meal plus whatever Levi refused to eat by that time AND snuck Skittles in the pantry when he wasn’t looking. My second thought is… “Oh, shoot. Thistle is a fancy restaurant, isn’t it?” I ask Cooper, looking up with wide, frightened eyes.
He chuckles softly and nods like I’m the cutest thing he’s ever seen—and I don’t mean cute in a sexy way. “Yeah. What’s wrong with that?”
I shake my head, feeling the weight of my stupid, stupid decision settling over me. “I don’t have fancy clothes! I have mom clothes. Appropriate for crouching down on the ground and playing leapfrog with Levi without showing my butt crack kind of clothes.
His grin widens, and honestly, I want to jump him. He holds out his hand for me, and I hesitate a moment before taking it. He starts tugging me out of the kitchen toward my bedroom. “Come on. Let’s see what you’ve got.”
I giggle like a silly little schoolgirl who just learned about innuendos and my brain definitely assumed that was one, and also because seeing his fantastic back as he pulls me toward my bedroom has carbonated my nerves, making them foam up through my body. “You’re going to help me pick out my clothes?”
“Yep.”
“Well, that’s nice of you.”
“Mmhmm. I’m a stand-up guy.” Does anyone else think he sounds a little more gruff than normal? It’s probably all in my head. What jealous man would help a woman pick out the perfect outfit for a date?
We step into my explosion of a room, and I pull Cooper to a stop, my face flaming with embarrassment. “Wait! Close your eyes. I need to pick up a few things.”
He doesn’t obey, just smiles. “Too late—already saw the pink underwear on the floor by the dresser. It was literally the first thing my eyes made contact with.” He’s so full of smug delight, and I race across the room, rip it from the ground, and toss it into my hamper.
Cooper sits down on the edge of my bed and bounces a little before turning a daring grin at me. His thoughts are projecting from his eyes as he makes a show of checking how springy my mattress is.
I point a threatening finger at him. “Stop that!”
“Stop what?” he asks, all innocence.
“I know you’re just trying to get a rise out of me by doing suggestive things on my bed. Knock it off.”
He leans back onto his elbows and—WILL SOMEONE PLEASE GET THIS MAN A SHIRT?! “I told you, I like seeing you blush.”
Great, now this is the image of Cooper that’s going to be burned into my mind all night as I have to go stare at a mediocre man and pretend I find him half as attractive as the Calvin Klein model lying across my mattress.
“You need to put on a shirt.”
He grins because he can completely read my thoughts. “Yes, ma’am.”
