Fuck.
FUCK!
I push my hand through my hair as I slowly back away from the road, Aubree disappearing into The Almond Store. Do I go after her again?
Do I obey her wishes?
I’m so conflicted that I feel paralyzed.
Paralyzed in thought and paralyzed in movement.
I wasn’t prepared for this, and I should have been. I should have known Wallace would come into town and try to fuck this up, and boy, did he do it in grand fashion. Never in a million years would I have guessed that he’d bring Cadance with him.
“You look like you care that she walked away,” Wallace says. I turn to find him at the edge of the parking lot, arms crossed.
Something inside me flips as I charge toward him. Fear crosses his eyes right before I grip him by the shirt and push him up against my SUV.
“You motherfucker,” I say. “You couldn’t just let me be fucking happy, could you? You had to come over here and ruin it because you’re so goddamn unhappy with your life.” I slam him into the car again, causing him to wheeze.
“Wyatt, put him down,” Cadance says, pulling on my shoulder.
I turn toward her, feeling the wrath of my anger unfold one layer at a time. “And you, coming over here trying to act like you left me because of me, not because of you. What kind of fucked up are you to try to mess with my head like that?”
“I’m not trying to—”
“The fuck you’re not.” I release Wallace as I turn toward her. “You told me you weren’t in love with me. To my fucking face, you said it. If it was a trust issue, why would you say you didn’t love me? Just to hurt me? Either way, I don’t want to hear it. I don’t even want to fucking see you. I’ve moved on.”
“Oh please,” Wallace says. “You and I both know the only reason you married that town bumpkin is because you want the cabin.”
Town bumpkin?
The fuck did he say?
I pull back my fist, cocking it all the way back, and start to send it forward just as Cadance grips me, halting me from knocking the teeth right out of my cousin’s mouth.
“Don’t,” she nearly yells. “He’ll press charges, and you know it.”
“Why the fuck do you care?” I ask her. “You don’t care about me. If you did, you wouldn’t have shown up here.” I turn toward Wallace and say, “And call her that again, and you will find my fist down your fucking throat. Aubree is anything but a town bumpkin. She’s my fucking wife . . . the woman I love.”
“Oh fuck off,” Wallace says. “You don’t love her.”
“I do,” I say, standing taller. “And I don’t need to prove that to anyone but her.”
I turn away, but Cadance grabs me. “Wyatt, don’t you think we should talk?”
“No,” I say, looking her dead in the eyes. “I have nothing to say to you.”
“You can’t possibly walk away without at least talking to me.”
“I can,” I answer. “And I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to actually figure this shit out in my head.” I turn toward her, knowing this is exactly how I feel, deep in my bones. “You did me a favor walking out on me,” I say. “Because if you didn’t do that, I very well might be in a loveless marriage right now. Because as much as I was devastated that night, I know now after meeting Aubree that what I felt for you doesn’t even come close to what I feel for Aubree. I thought I knew what love was, but fuck was I wrong. So . . . thank you for that night, for crushing me, because I never would have known true happiness if it wasn’t for you.”
“Wyatt,” she whispers, stunned and insulted.
But I don’t give a fuck. What I said was true, and I’m not taking it back.
I turn toward Wallace and say, “Stay the fuck out of my marriage and away from me, or else I’m filing for a restraining order.”
With that, I move away from them and jog across the street, right up to The Almond Store. I open the door just as Hattie appears from the back room. When her eyes meet mine, they narrow with hate.
Not surprised.
“Where is she, Hattie?”
Hattie folds her arms across her chest. “What did you do?”
“Please, Hattie, can I just talk to her?”
“You realize my sister doesn’t cry, right? That’s not something she does, so to see her in tears, it means you fucked up, and I want to know what you did.”
“She’s crying?” I ask, feeling so fucking sick to my stomach.
“Yes, she’s crying. Now tell me what you did.”
I let out a heavy sigh, trying to reason with the guard dog standing in my way. “Hattie, please let me just check on her and settle things with her. I appreciate you protecting her, but I need to talk to her myself.”
Hattie purses her lips, thinking on it, then by the grace of God, she says, “In the back, up the stairs to the apartment.” I move toward the back, but she stops me before I can move past the door. “Ryland is aware you hurt her, and so is Hayes. Watch yourself, Wyatt.”
And with that, she steps aside, and I move past her up the stairs to a closed door. I don’t bother knocking. I just let myself into what looks like a small apartment with slanted ceilings and a queen bed pushed up against the wall. That’s all I notice before my eyes land on Aubree, who is curled up on the bed, her back toward me.
My stomach plummets as I shut the door behind me.
“Aubree,” I say quietly, and I watch her back go stiff.
In a sniffly voice, she says, “Go away, Wyatt.”
Yeah, like that’s going to fucking happen.
I move into the room and sit on the edge of the bed.
“I said leave, Wyatt.” She sniffs, and it feels like everything in me shatters because I brought on those tears. I’m the one who hurt her when I told her I never would.
I’m supposed to be her rock, her comfort, and here I am, hurting her.
“Aubree, baby, please can we talk.”
“A little too late, don’t you think?”
Yeah, I deserve that.
And I know it will be really hard to break through to her, but I have to at least try.
“I’m sorry,” I say.
She lifts up from the bed and scoots away from me. She pulls her knees into her chest and holds her legs tightly as she looks back at me. I’m met with red eyes, tear-stained cheeks and an expression of hurt.
It guts me.
“Why are you sorry?” she asks. “For hurting me? For not telling me the truth about Cadance? For lying? Or are you sorry that you got caught?”
“I’m sorry for hurting you,” I say, wanting to reach out to her, but I know she won’t allow it. “Back there, that was something you never should have been a part of.”
“Why?” she asks. “Because you didn’t want me to know?”
“No,” I say. “You didn’t need to find out like that.”
“You’re right. I didn’t,” she says. “I should have heard it from you. You should have told me about her when I asked. You should have told me more about you, but as I’m sitting here, staring at you, all I can think is . . . I don’t know this man at all.”
“Aubree, that’s not true.”
“It is true,” she shouts, then scoots off the bed and stands. “I know nothing about you, nothing beneath the surface, nothing that I can’t learn from your author bio. You haven’t shared anything with me. I mean, Jesus, Wyatt, you were going to be married to someone else. Don’t you think you should have shared that with me?”
“I was going to,” I say in a panic. “I was just trying to find the right time.”
“You mean you were trying to get over her first, right? Use me as a distraction to squash the hurt she caused. Meanwhile, I’m over here, falling in love with a man who can’t even be honest with me when asked.”
Falling in love?
She grips her forehead. “I mean, what the hell am I even doing? I’ve gotten so lost, so caught up in the fanfare of someone actually giving a shit about me that I lose all sense of myself?”
“Aubree—”
“No,” she shouts, holding her hand up. “Don’t. I don’t want to hear anything from you. I should have known this was going to happen. I told myself to keep it together, not to fall under this enchanting spell you seem to put on people, but slowly, I got caught up in it as well, and that’s my fault. I lost my composure, but that won’t happen again.” She wipes her tears and raises her chin. “I understand what this is, who we are together, and I understand the contract we signed. There will be nothing else between us other than what we signed up for. I should have never let it get this far. I see my mistake now.”
She moves toward the door, but I stand from the bed, my heart tearing out of my chest with every step she takes away from me. “Aubree, please, just listen to me.”
“No, Wyatt,” she says, looking over my shoulder. “This is done . . . I’ll see you back at the guest house.”
And then she takes off, her stoic, empty persona pushing her loveable, soft exterior right out of the way. She’s back to the woman she was when I first saw her.
And it’s all my fucking fault.
AUBREE
“HOW LONG HAS SHE BEEN CRYING?” Ryland says as I lie against the couch, unable to control myself.
“Since we left The Almond Store,” Hattie replies. “Wyatt was there and tried talking to her. I still don’t know what’s happening.”
The floor creaks, and I hear Ryland approaching right before he sits beside me and places his hand on my knee.
“Hey Aubree, can we get you anything?”
I shake my head as more tears fall down my cheeks.
“Grab her tissues,” Ryland says to Hattie.
Hattie is on it and has tissues to him in seconds. He takes one out and dabs at my face, which only makes me cry even more. We may have had a tough childhood, and we might not have been shown the kind of love every kid deserves, but somehow, we persevered and showed love to each other. That’s exactly what Ryland is doing.
“When you’re ready, we’re here to listen,” he says.
I take one of the tissues and dab at my eyes as well, realizing that if I’m going to make it through this next year, I’m going to need all the support I can get, which means telling them the truth.
While I was up in the apartment above The Almond Store, I thought about what I was going to do with Wyatt and how I’d handle this. I could walk away and call everything off, but I know if that were the case, he’d hand over the land and consider me stubborn, but I’m not taking that for free. I’m earning it, even if it means saving up enough to buy it off him early. But I refuse to take it because he hurt me or he pities me. This means I’ll be spending the next year with him, and I can only do that if my family surrounds me with support.
After a few deep breaths, I look up at Ryland and Hattie, who has moved an ottoman in close so we’re all sitting in what feels like a triangle.
“Um, I have to tell you guys something.”
“Okay,” Ryland says.
“But I beg of you, please don’t get mad.”
Ryland’s jaw clenches before he says, “Did Wyatt do something to you? Did he hurt you physically? Because I won’t be able to remain calm about that.”
I shake my head. “No, he’s never harmed me. It’s nothing like that.”
Ryland only slightly relaxes as he nods his head.
“But I will say, I haven’t been entirely truthful with you. Um . . .” I dab at my eyes again as guilt swarms me. “Wyatt and I . . . well, we married for convenience.”
Hattie sits back while Ryland’s brow creases in confusion. “What do you mean?” he asks.
“The week he initially came into town, well, it wasn’t because we were secretly seeing each other. He actually came into town because he had a business proposal for me.” I try to stop my hand from shaking as I continue telling the truth. “You see, he has this family cabin that means a lot to him, and the only way he’d get ownership of it was if he was married. He didn’t want it going to his horrible cousin, Wallace, so he came to me and asked if I’d marry him.”
“Why would he do that?” Hattie asks. “He barely knew you.”
“He told me if I married him, he’d give me ownership of his half of the farm.”
“What?” Ryland yells as he stands. “He fucking blackmailed you?”
“No,” I say as Ryland’s hand clenches at his side. I tug on him to sit back down, and thankfully, he does. “It was more of an agreement.”
“Why did you go along with it?” Hattie asks, looking hurt.
“Because I felt desperate to do something right for Cassidy. To do something right for myself. I felt like I was drowning in uncertainty and lacking in confidence. I saw Amanda and Matt together, and well, it was a perfect storm of insecurity that made me say yes. And the more I got to know Wyatt, the more I realized that he was . . . well, he was the kind of guy who made me feel seen, and slowly, I started to fall for him.” I bite my bottom lip. “I just wish I wasn’t so naïve in those feelings.”
“What do you mean?” Ryland asks. “Was he using you?”
I shake my head. “No, but I don’t think he’s fully over his ex-fiancée, who he was supposed to marry two months ago. I think that’s probably why he came to me. That marriage didn’t go through, so he struck up a deal.” I dab at my eyes as a new wave of tears forms. “That’s what I found out today. Here I am, falling for the man while he’s holding in the kind of information that would have been good to know. He was holding back, and you should have seen the look on his face when he saw her. It was clear that there was still emotion there.” I shake my head again. “I just feel foolish.”
To my surprise, Hattie draws in closer and takes my hand in hers. “Do not feel foolish for letting your heart lead the way.”
“Hattie, I fell for someone who I feel like I don’t even know now. That is foolish.”
“That’s love,” Hattie says softly. “And I know Ryland might not agree with me, but given the way we grew up, especially you, when you find comfort, you cling to it because our childhood was anything but comforting. I know when Hayes came into my life, it felt like this weight I’ve been carrying for so long was lifted, like I could share the burden of it. Is that how you felt with Wyatt?”
I nod as a tear slips down my cheek. “But it’s stupid because it wasn’t real.”
“It was—”
“Why are you defending him?” Ryland says to Hattie. “He clearly used our sister, didn’t tell her the whole truth, and made her fall for him. Why are you glorifying this?”
Hattie sits back, stunned by the harshness in his voice. “I wasn’t glorifying it, Ryland. I was trying to help her see that what she was feeling wasn’t foolish.”
“But don’t try to convince her that everything he did was right because it wasn’t. He used her to his advantage. He wanted something, he had leverage with the land, and he used it. That’s fucked up. No one treats my fucking sisters like that.”
“His intentions might not have been right at the beginning, but I think toward the end, recently, they have been in favor of Aubree,” Hattie says.
“Why do you think that?” Ryland asks.
“Because I know what love is,” Hattie says while pointing at her chest and getting emotional over it. “I know what it means to give your heart to someone else, to depend on them to keep it safe. I’m not afraid to put myself out there like you are, Ryland.”
“I’m not fucking afraid,” he says.
“Says the guy who hasn’t had a solid relationship since his high school sweetheart left him.”
Ryland’s eyes narrow on Hattie, and I can feel him ready to burst. “It’s because I’ve had responsibilities,” he says through clenched teeth. “Why do you think there was food on the table every night just before Dad died? It was because of me. Because I was working, because I was supporting this family. And the moment I had a chance to think about myself, Clarke died, which meant I was Cassidy’s primary helper, Aubree a close second. I haven’t had the fucking time in my life to even consider the kind of freedom to feel the way you have, Hattie. And don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful you’ve found Hayes, but don’t throw it in my face that you know what love is. If you grew up in my world, in my childhood, with Dad’s fist being the only thing that kissed your face, you wouldn’t be so prone to know what love is either.”
“Ryland, I’m . . . I’m sorry,” Hattie says as her eyes start to water.
“I know,” he says while squeezing her hand. He then turns to me and lets out a deep sigh. “Fuck, Aubree, we lost sight of what’s going on. I’m sorry.”
I shake my head, looking between my two siblings. “Please don’t apologize for wanting to protect me. I should have told you guys, but I didn’t want you to change my mind. Hattie, I didn’t want you to tell me that I shouldn’t marry for anything but love, and Ryland, I didn’t want you to try to help me buy the land from Wyatt somehow, which I knew you would have done. I wanted to do this myself, and it felt like this was the easiest way to do it because I’ve been so closed off.” I press my lips together, trying to hold back another wave of tears. “I didn’t think he’d wiggle his way into my life the way he did. I didn’t think I’d find comfort in him, peace . . . protection. I didn’t think I’d fall for him, yet I did.”
“Does he know how you feel?”
“Yes,” I say, wiping my tears. “And it’s fine, I can—”
The front door to the farmhouse opens, and our eyes fall on Wyatt, standing in the doorway, looking distraught and disheveled.
Immediately, Ryland stands, but I grab his hand so he can’t move forward. “What the fuck are you doing here?” Ryland nearly growls.
“I wanted to talk to Aubree.” Respectively, Wyatt stands his ground, unmoving from the clear threat that is my brother.
“Talk to her about what? The deal you made with her? How you made her fall for you while you were in love with someone else?”
“You told them?” Wyatt asks, looking at me.
“Of course she fucking told us,” Ryland says. “She should have told us from day one. Was that your idea as well? To lie to us?”
Wyatt stuffs his hands in his pockets but looks Ryland directly in the eye when he says, “I take full responsibility for everything. Yes, I told her not to tell you. I even threatened her if she did.”
“You motherfucker,” Ryland says as he starts to charge, but I grip him tightly. “Let me the fuck go, Aubree.”
“No,” I shout. “Ryland, stop. This won’t make anything better.”
“It sure as hell will make me feel a whole lot better.”
“Let him punch me,” Wyatt says. “I deserve it, and if it’ll make him feel better, then let him do it.”
“You heard him,” Ryland says as he shakes free of my clutch and charges after Wyatt, who doesn’t flinch, doesn’t move. And before I can even catch up to Ryland, I see his fist cock back, only to fly forward and connect with Wyatt’s face on a crunch.
A shrill scream tumbles past my lips as Wyatt falls to the floor, and Ryland starts to straddle him. That’s when I jump on top of Ryland, and Hattie helps, pulling him away.
This is not the first time Ryland has raised a fist to one of the men in this family. He also got in a fight with Hayes as well. Ryland might not carry the same kind of fist our dad did once, but when he’s protecting his loved ones, he sure knows how to use it.
“Stop, Ryland,” I yell as I pull him away with Hattie’s help. “Just stop.”
Wyatt runs his hand under his nose, where it’s bleeding, and looks Ryland in the eyes. “Feel better?”
“No.” Ryland breathes heavily, ready to strike again. I can feel it. “You said you wouldn’t fucking hurt her. You lied to my goddamn face.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt her,” Wyatt says calmly. “I was trying to protect her when, in reality, I ended up hurting her.”
“Protecting her? By forcing her to marry you?”
“He didn’t force me,” I say. “I willingly agreed to marry him.”
“Because he dangled the farmland in front of you,” Ryland shouts, then turns his attention toward Wyatt. “What kind of man does that?”
“A desperate one,” Wyatt says. “Pathetic one.”
“Pathetic is more like it.” Ryland stands taller. “Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to get an annulment, you’re going to give Aubree the title to the land, and then you’re going to leave our fucking lives and never return.”
“Ryland, no,” I say, my voice growing stronger. “We’re not going to take the land.”
“Fine.” Ryland moves toward the kitchen and digs into a drawer, where he pulls out a checkbook. “I have money. I’ll buy it from you. Name your price.”
“Ryland, that money is going toward a new house for you and Mac,” I say. “You’re not giving that up.”
“Aubree, I’m not going to stand by and watch this fuckhead take advantage of you.”
“He’s not,” I finally say, hating that I have to defend him. “I agreed fairly to work with him on this deal. I said I’d marry him so we both would win. And I’m holding true to my word. I’ll stay married to him.”
“You will?” Wyatt asks, looking confused.
“Yes,” I say, finally looking at him and his bloody face. “We will stay married. We will put on a show because, if anything, I keep my word. But when it comes to you and me on a personal level, that’s done.” I turn to my brother and say, “Ryland, I expect you to be cordial around Wyatt. If anything, do it for Mac. He will be here for a year, so we’ll have to figure out how to live with him being around.” I now turn to Hattie, who looks like a deer in headlights, completely scared. “Hattie, this stays between us. This deal, it does not leave this room. I don’t care how angry or upset you are. I want this land, and this is the only way I’ll accept it. Understood?”
Hattie nods but doesn’t say anything.
“As for you,” I say to Wyatt. “I suggest you find a way to make this better with my brother because he’s the one who protects Mac, and if you want any semblance of a relationship with your niece, then he’s the one you’ll have to speak with.”
And with that, I head out of the farmhouse and straight to the guest house, where I take a long, hot shower. Once again, I’ve let my guard down around a man who will never love me.
But I refuse to be beaten down by this. I refuse to buckle.
I will pick myself up like I’ve done many times before, and I’ll come out the other side stronger.
Like I’ve done many times before too.
WYATT
THE DOOR SHUTS, and I’m left with Ryland and Hattie, who seem just as stunned and confused as I am. Hattie hands me a tissue, and grateful, I take it, wiping my nose and the blood that seems to still be dripping out of it.
They stare at me. I shift uncomfortably, and after a few moments of silence, Ryland says, “Do you have anything you want to fucking say?”
I really fucking do.
Looking Ryland dead in the eyes, I say, “I love your sister. I’m in love with her, and I will do anything to make this right. Anything.”
Hattie takes a step forward. “You . . . you love her?”
“Yes,” I say while wiping my nose. “And I wanted to tell her that, but well, I fucked everything up.”
Ryland studies me for a moment, his eyes like lasers. After a few moments of dreadful silence, he finally says, “Take a seat. I’ll grab you an ice pack.”
Relief floods through me as I take a seat at the dining room table, Hattie following closely. She sits across from me, and so does Ryland as he tosses me the ice pack. Normally, I’d probably skip the ice, but fuck does Ryland have a strong right hook. My face is throbbing.
“Start from the beginning and don’t lie. Whatever you say will be vital to how much or how little we help you,” Ryland says.
“Understood, but I want you to know, I don’t expect your help. I’m the one who messed up, so I’m the one who needs to fix this.”
“I respect that. Now tell me, why did you think it would be smart to blackmail my sister into marrying you?”
I don’t even correct him because if I want this to go right, I will need to take full responsibility for my actions. “My ex, Cadance, broke off our wedding the night before it was supposed to happen. I was nursing my wounds when I was reminded that the family cabin I was supposed to take ownership of would go to my cousin, Wallace, because he was the next in line to get married. He doesn’t care about the cabin and would knock it down. That cabin, well, it means just as much to me as The Almond Store means to you, Hattie. Or the farm means to Aubree. I couldn’t let it get into the wrong hands, so I stupidly came up with a plan. I knew Aubree would want the land, and I thought we could work out a deal.”
“So you two didn’t have contact before the week you first came into town?”
I shake my head. “The only other times I’ve seen or spoken to Aubree was when Clarke and Cassidy were still alive. I surprised her and offered up the deal. It wasn’t until she ran into Amanda and Matt and their awful comments did she agree to go through with it. I know she did it to save face, and at one point, I tried to back out, but she was set on marrying me. And as we moved around town together, selling the idea of our relationship to everyone around us, I started to feel something for her on a different level. And those feelings grew with every moment I spent with her. Her strength and intelligence, her love for her family, her dedication to Cassidy’s legacy, I fell hard for it all. Before I knew it, I was saying I do to someone I fell hard and quick for. And I was so fucking terrified that I’d lose her, that she wouldn’t feel the same way, that I held back on anything that would scare her away since she was so skittish. Meaning I didn’t tell her about Cadance. I know now how big of a mistake that was.”
“When you got married, did she know about your feelings for her?”
I shake my head. “I told her when we were in the cabin. She confessed her feelings first, and I fell right in line, knowing it would be safe to tell her how I felt. I had plans to tell her about Cadance. I just wanted to find a time when it would work. I realize now that time would have been at the very beginning. But my stubborn ego got in the way, and I couldn’t fathom telling her that I was left the night before my wedding.”
Ryland nods as he sits back in his chair. “When did you tell her to drop out of the deal?”
“Early on,” I say. “And I offered her an out many times. I’d offer her the out now if I knew she’d take it. I’d give her the land, I’d give up my fucking cabin, anything, and I mean anything, to just at least make this right.”
Ryland slowly nods his head. “Good answer.” He continues to study me. “I don’t like what you did, but it seems Aubree was equally involved in the reason she married you. Regarding the rest, that seems to be between the two of you, but I will tell you that she doesn’t trust easily, especially men. The fact that she trusted you enough to enter into some marriage deal tells me you’ve made an impression on her. Now it’s up to you if that impression will be lasting.”
“I knew you loved her,” Hattie whispers. When her eyes meet mine, she adds, “And I knew she loved you. I could see it. She was so different. Lighter, happier. Like the weight of the world was no longer resting on her shoulders. Since you’ve gotten here, I’ve seen a shift in her behavior. She’s smiled more. She’s talked more. She’s done things like the burlesque show that she wouldn’t have done before. You’ve made an impact in her life, Wyatt, and I just need to say, if you’re not serious about this, if you’re not serious about her, then please walk away now. Don’t hurt her any more than you already have. I know Cassidy would say the same thing. We want her to love and be happy. I think she could be happy with you, but only if you’re in it for the long haul.”
“I understand,” I say. “And you have my word that I’m serious about this. I want her for the long haul. I want to be the man she trusts and loves. The one she can depend on other than her brother. I want to be the man who deserves her love back.”
Hattie nods. “Then good luck. She’s not going to give in easily.”
“She’s going to put up one hell of a fight. Good luck digging yourself out,” Ryland says, leaning back in his chair. “Also, you owe me at least five nights of babysitting of my choosing. Mainly so I can see how serious you are at being in our lives, especially Mac’s and Aubree’s.”
“Make it ten, then,” I say.
Ryland leans over the table and holds out his hand. “Deal.”
